Natasha Romanov - Tumblr Posts

⋅˚₊‧ ୨୧ ‧₊˚ ⋅ 𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭'𝐬 𝐚 𝐬𝐞𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐭 𝐠𝐚𝐫𝐝𝐞𝐧, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐬 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲 𝐡𝐢𝐠𝐡

pairing . Natasha Romanoff x fem! reader

summary . two girls with a pure heart and the will to do the best things in the world, but forced to do the one they would never dream of doing.

warnings . red room, suicidal thoughts (lmk if i have to add more.)

notes . i'm sick, got a really bad flu — and those are somehow the only times i get inspiration to write (also when depressed <3) this one goes through red room era, so both Nat and reader are little. english is not my first language (🇧🇷) so i apologize for any spelling errors.

divider credits: @iwonbin, @iluvrei

your 'parents' had left. they went to the store, so the house was all yours. Natasha was curled up on the corner of the couch, watching intently the movie playing on the television screen. her eyebrows were slightly furrowed, eyes narrowing at the screen. you could tell she wasn't watching the movie. she was paying attention to the actors performance, how they expressed their emotion, how they behaved in front of the cameras.

"you'd want to be an actress?" you ask softly, making her jump slightly, breaking her trance.

"maybe." she simply replies, shrugging her shoulders. she sighs and leans back against the backrest, grabbing the remote and fidgeting with it. "you?"

"i think it would be fun." you giggle, eyebrows raising as a bunch of little scenarios played on your head. "not necessarily a movie star. just.. be able to show people how i actually feel, you know?"

Natasha hums, a small smile tugging on her lips. it was the one job that was the complete opposite from your daily life — that was what being a spy was like, hide your emotions, hide from people, hide hide hide. from everything. absolutely no one knew you — neither you did, since you had to change identities every year or so.

"i think, you could do absolutely anything you ever want to do." she says, pointing her finger at you. "if you become an actress, i will be in your every premiere, watch all your interviews, and be the first one to buy the tickets for your movies,"

you laugh, playfully slapping her finger away. "you smartass,"

⋅˚₊‧ ୨୧ ‧₊˚ ⋅

silence filled the house as everybody went to sleep, except for you and Natasha, of course. you always stayed awake late, even if one of the rules was go to sleep at 8:30pm. you both jumped out of bed quietly and hurried to open the blinds, so you could see the starry sky.

"do they really think we're asleep?" you inquire with a smirk, sitting down on the cold tile floor and patting the space between your legs.

Natasha sits down with you and carefully leans her weight against you, her head on your chest. "if you keep shouting like that they might figure it out."

you shake your head at her sarcasm and chuckle. your eyes drift to her hair, the pink strands illuminated by the moonlight. you carefully grab a few of them and begin braiding them. "when are you going to Ohio?"

and when she was about to relax, you ask the most inconvenient question in the most inconvenient time. why did you have to bring up that? Ohio was not a mission like this one — she'd meet other widows, future widows, you weren't gonna be there. and she didn't want to be away from you.

you notice how she stays silent, and decide not to push. you finish the two little braids on her short hair and coaxes her head back to your chest, arms wrapping around her.

"do you think," Natasha begins, quietly, as if this was a topic she'd like to avoid. she gulps, eyes locked on the twinkling stars. "do you think we would be happier if we weren't here?"

the question wasn't direct, but you understood perfectly. being a normal girl meant never being in the red room, which meant never meeting each other. that was a tough one, but the answer was obvious.

"yeah," you nod, shrugging, pondering. "you know, Natalia? i think that even if we were born in different families, somehow the universe would find a way for us to meet."

she smiles, feeling a warm, fuzzy feeling in her chest. something rare. something that didn't happen often. it quickly faded, but she appreciated that. "i hope so. because right now? i'd throw myself down this window if i could."

"so would i," you chuckle humorlessly. the life of a widow would never end up with joy, you both knew what you were submitted to.

she shifts her body, pulling her head back a little to look in your eyes. she didn't have to speak for you to understand. gratitude, longing, pain. "moya malenkaya zvezdochka, (my little star),"

⋅˚₊‧ ୨୧ ‧₊˚ ⋅

"we're leaving!" you yell, a smile on your face as you watched Natasha finish adjusting her white dress. she wore black chucks and her hair was down. out of every style she ever played, this was the one you most liked. dresses.

"where are you going?" your 'mom' asks, her smile widening as she sees her daughters all dressed up.

"just riding our bikes!" you answer, putting your hair up on a ponytail and putting your shoes on. "we're not going too far, promise!"

"okay! come back before five!" the woman answers as you run out of the house, grabbing your bikes and hopping on them.

"—back before five," Natasha mimicks her with a silly face and a high pitched voice, coaxing a laugh out of you. "we know mom. you tell us that every freaking day."

and with that, you both go pedalling to downtown, which was yes, a little too far from home. Italy was very beautiful, sunny, full of joyful people around. sometimes you hated that. Natasha suddenly stops as you pass through a little flower shop. it was tiny, and the grandpa behind the counter seemed kind.

"would Natalia like to receive a flower bouquet today?" you try a rough voice, which made her laugh. you hop out of the bike and run in the store.

"ciao, bambina! (hi, little one!)" the man exclaims, his happiness almost surprising you.

"hey!" you match his good humor and point at a colorful bouquet on a basket. "how much for these?"

"these are 50 euros, but for you, young lady, i can make.. 49!" he laughs, grabbing the bouquet and carefully handing it to you.

you raise an eyebrow at the joke, grabbing the coins from your pocket and placing them on the counter. after he counts everything, you don't even say goodbye before running to Natasha again.

"here you go, malyshka, (sweetheart)," you politely bow and hand her the flowers, feigning chivalry. it seemed stupid, but her smile seemed way too genuine for your liking.

she grabs the bouquet and smell the flowers, a small tear runs down her cheek, which she quickly wipes away. "thank you,"

you nod, a little heat creeping up your cheeks. you would never receive flowers, neither from a romantic partner, nor a relative — that was for sure, so you did it, even if it wasn't real.

oh, how much she wanted to say the three forbidden words right now.

⋅˚₊‧ ୨୧ ‧₊˚ ⋅

it was raining, heavily.

the time was approaching. the time..

the time for the Sicily mission was almost over. general Dreykov, along with his soldiers would soon be there to retreat you, just like the police. it was always like that.

"come on!" Natasha calls, extending her hand for you as she steps out of the house. "we got to go,"

"gonna get a cold, Natalia," you laugh, grabbing her hand and stepping out as well. you immediately got drenched in water, shivering from the coldness.

"are you scared?" she mocks, shaking her head.

pink droplets of pink hair dye fell down the concrete ground, a colorful contrast of what it used to be. her hair would soon be blue. you didn't like that.

"where are we going?" you ask, running with Natasha as she took off the yard, leaving the household.

"anywhere," she yells back to you, running across the sidewalk, as you followed behind. you rolled your eyes slightly, shrugging.

as you ran, the cacophony of the city could soon be heard. probably your parents would realize you weren't home and call the cops or something. but that didn't matter. not when you were both trained spies. you found a small park — which was empty due the rain — and sat on one of the benches.

"i don't know if we'll meet again after this," you say quietly, finger traveling upwards to tuck a strand of pink behind her ear. "you're going to America. i'm returning to Asia. and the chance of us being paired up again is so small—"

"i love you," she interrupts, voice weak and almost tired. "gosh, i always wanted to tell you that."

your eyes widen, a mixture of foreign emotions filling your being at her confession. "i love you, too,"

"when we grow up, i'll marry you." she smiles, scooting closer. "and we'll live a happy life. we'll have a picket fence and a birdhouse. we'll have a cat and a dog and probably adopt a kid,"

tears run down your cheeks, blending with the rain droplets. you nod, wrapping your arms tightly around her neck, a hug she quickly returned.

"chertovski nespravedlivyy mir, (goddamn unfair world,)" you murmur against her skin, pulling back to look into her eyes.

"it is," she agrees, placing her palm on your cheek. "it's ironic. i'm glad you're here with me. but i don't want you to. i don't want either of us to be here."

"but we are," you whisper, taking a quick glance to the people around, seeing their gaze almost burning you. "that's how life is, i guess."

and with that, you and Natasha lost each other — having to cling to the memories, to the small comfort they brought.

because a widow never had a happy ending.

to be continued..?

˗ˏˋ ꒰ ♡ ꒱ ˎˊ˗ 𝐬𝐡𝐡... 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐚 𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐥𝐞 𝐛𝐢𝐭 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐞

pairing . Natasha Romanoff x virgin! fem! reader

summary . when she decides to make the move and discovers you had never experienced anything like that ever before, she plans the perfect way to put your fears away and get to see that side of yours for the first time.

warnings . smut! i am not responsible for your content consumption! — implied sexual abuse (from Dreykov), virginity loss, foreplay, nipple play, strap on usage, fingering, multiple orgasms, lots of praises, Natasha's incredibly hot russian.

notes . english is not my first language (🇧🇷) so i apologize for any spelling errors. feedback is highly appreciated! <3

divider credits: @anitalenia

you had been waiting for Nat to come home from the avengers compound all day. she had told you Tony was making some updates on FRIDAY and needed the team's opinion on everything, so she stayed there a little longer than the usual.

you had to admit — it was never the same without her in the house. wearing her clothes didn't help as much as you thought, neither did Liho meowing all day as if telling you she missed her.

so your eyes perked up to the door as you heard the doorknob turning, eyes sparkling at the sight of Natasha. she was smiling.

most of the times she came back from the compound she had bruises and cuts from missions, and looked down and tired. so knowing she had fun with her team made your day a hundred times better. even if it was already midnight.

"hey, kitten," she chuckles and crouches down to pick the cat up as she runs to her, immediately nuzzling against her and meowing. "i missed you too,"

"i missed you too." you say quietly, Natasha's eyes immediately following the voice. she drops her bag on the floor and runs towards you, sitting on the edge of the couch where you laid.

"hi, dorogaya!" she places her hand on your cheek and pecks your lips, coaxing a little sigh out of you. her mouth then travels to your forehead to plant a kiss there. "i'm sorry for making you wait. but it was so fun. all i could think about was coming home and telling you!"

you giggle, seeing her so enthusiastic. you shift to make room for her on the couch and she adjusts herself so you're leaning on her chest now — Liho laying comfortably on both of you. "okay. tell me!"

"so," she begins, taking a deep breath as she became selfconscious about how happy she was. "Ant Man was there, and he was struggling with his pym-particle blasters and he became very very tiny. more than he should. and then, when Tony opened FRIDAY's device, he decided to tease all of us and entered there, tickling the artificial intelligence! she pretended to laugh, and Tony couldn't understand why everything he was trying to do wasn't working."

her laugh was so sweet, so genuine, that a sense of calm washed over you, everything was okay now, you were both okay. and knowing Natasha, having her happy was the best gift you could ever have. your arms wrapped around her neck, and you kisses the tip of her nose. "i'm glad you had a great day with them,"

Natasha's lips parted as she felt the kiss, her gaze locking with yours. she realized she had finally gotten rid of that feeling that something bad could happen anytime. she wasn't alert 24/7 anymore. now, she was home. with you. "i did.. and i have you now."

she carefully picks the sleeping cat and place her on the little bed next to the couch, then returns her attention to you. her hands travel down to your waist, fingertips sliding under the thin shirt you wore. you gulp, fingers tangling in her red locks and pulling her closer.

"i have you, now." you repeat quietly, before crashing your lips on hers.

the russian immediately melts against you, a faint groan echoing from the back of her throat, the vibrations going straight to your core. she carefully lifts you up and pulls you onto her thigh, allowing your weight to rest on her. you usually didn't have make out sessions, since she was with the others most of the time, doing missions. but you wouldn't let that opportunity slide.

the tip of your tongue darts out and licks her bottom lip, a silent plea for something more. she was surprised. she didn't usually see you making the moves. her lips part fully, welcoming your tongue in her mouth, as she returns the action. her tongue mingles with yours, slowly, wanting to make the moment last, but it wasn't enough.

her hand slid up your back, pulling your chest flush against her own. you whimper as the kiss deepens, body shifting and molding perfectly with her. this was getting further than you thought it would.

Natasha broke the kiss with a small gasp, shifting your positions and carefully laying you down on the couch. her body hovered yours, and her lips trailed kisses down your face, your neck. your eyes widened — in surprise, but also in panic.

"Nat," you breathlessly whisper, weakly grabbing her shoulders to hold onto her. her lips didn't stop, only seeming to be hungrier and hungrier for you. "wait,"

"no, krasivaya, (beautiful,)" she mumbles against your skin, pulling your body even closer to her. she didn't want to stop. "just let me, please,"

you take a deep shaky breath to try and calm yourself down. you knew Natasha, and that she'd never hurt you, so this helped. you carefully took her face in your hands, and pulled her head which was tucked on your neck back. she took a great look into your eyes, and frowned. "what's up, baby?"

"nothing, it's just.." you sigh. her eyes narrow for a brief second, then, a small chuckle comes out of her mouth. damn it, she saw the soft pink creeping up your cheeks.

"are you shy?" she inquires, raising her eyebrow. you got relieved as she suddenly got off you and sat on the couch properly, pulling you onto her lap again and wrapping her arms around your waist.

"it's not that." you shake your head and look down, begining to pick on your nails.

it wasn't shyness. you just had a feeling that would lead towards sex. and not that you weren't ready, you just never had it before — other than pleasuring yourself — and Natasha didn't know that fact, until now.

"oh..." she suddenly realizes what's going on. instead of getting angry, a smile tugs on the corner of her lips again. she looks at your face for some good seconds, before wrapping her arms completely around your frame and pulling you to her chest.

that reminded her of all the times she was forced to do something she had no idea of what it was, all the times she felt scared, felt dirty, doing something she didn't want to. god, she didn't want you to feel like that. she never wanted anyone to feel like that, ever.

"are you a virgin, lyubovmoya? (my love,)" her voice sounds extremely calm and tender that it makes you a little surprised. "tell me,"

"yes, yes i am." you exhale and lean your head on her shoulder, eyes fluttering close.

"okay. do you wanna keep it like that?"

that. the question you've been most fearing. usually, if it were anybody else, you'd say no. but Natasha just made you feel so safe, so loved. you wanted to take that step further with her.

"no, i don't."

˗ˏˋ ꒰ ♡ ꒱ ˎˊ˗

"just keep 'em closed,"

your soft giggle melts Natasha. her hand covers your eyes as her hand maneuvers you by your hip, inside the bedroom. she had decided to keep everything natural for you this day. no rushed things. but she couldn't be happier. you were trusting her with that.

"did you feed Liho?" you whisper as Natasha carefully places you on a specific spot on the room.

"i'm about to fuck you and you're worried about the cat?" she laughs, making you gasp. you playfully smack her shoulder.

"you!" you smile. her hand gets removed from your eyes. they immediately get dreamy at the sight in front of you.

Natasha was only in a set of lingerie. for the first time ever, you saw her. it was something she thought — in order for you to feel safe, she'd have to show you she felt safe with you herself. because deep inside, she was just another broken, insecure person.

your eyes scanned her body, trying carefully not to stare too hard, seeing the scars and marks that engraved her skin. your fingertips shyly reached for her, and she didn't stop you. in fact, her hands hovered yours as she slid them up her skin.

a quiet 'wow' leaves you, followed by a genuine smile of yours. you pull her closer, looking all doe eyed at her. "you're beautiful,"

"i wanna see you too," she looks down at you. "can i?"

"you can," you hum, raising your arms, a silent invitation for her to undress you.

Natasha's fingertips gently tug at the hem of your blouse, before pulling it over your head. you were the complete opposite of her. smooth skin, no battle scars like hers. she was quick to kneel down and tease the buttons of your jeans, wanting to see if you would stop her or not.

"please, Natasha."

she does as you ask and undo the jeans, letting them pool around you on the floor. she helps you step out of them, and hum as you're both now half naked. everything felt otherworldly romantic and.. safe. even if Natasha was trying her best not to ruin you right there, just by seeing you so soft, so.. vulnerable for her like that. she liked being in control for once.

so your eyes squeezed shut as she suddenly pressed her body against yours and pinned you back against the wall. "shh."

your breath hitches in anticipation, her fingertips slowly tracing up your spine and allowing her palm to rest above the clasps of your bra. Natasha's free hand moves up your stomach, her knee sneakingly trapping you against the wall between your legs. she tucks a strand of hair behind your ear. "let me, malyshka. (baby). i know what i'm doing, just relax."

"mhm," a little whine comes out of your throat, which makes her smile. she nods in encouragement and moves her mouth close to your ear, pressing a kiss on the spot under it.

"ya ne khochu, chtoby ty zhalel obo mne, detka, (i don't want you to regret me, baby,)" she whispers in your ear, and you have no idea of what it means. but something was right — the thin fabric of your panties felt extremely soaked right now. "so, i'll make you feel so, so good."

"please," you wrap your arms around her neck, pressing yourself closer. her skin felt better than you could have ever imagined against your own.

"i'm here." she reassures you, then carefully spins you around and lay you down on the bed. her hand that ghosted over your back undid the clasps of your bra, and tossed it somewhere else on the floor.

you're absolutely sure that it was not the cold air that made you shiver and that got your nipples hard. you gulp, breathing coming out in soft pants as Natasha's hands gently handled you, cupping your breasts as her lips pressed a trail of kisses on the valley between them. "you're gorgeous, my girl."

"you feel so good," you breathe, subconsciously leaning towards her hands. her thumb pinches your nipple as she suddenly latches on you, slowly sucking on your other breast, giving both of them the same attention. "Natasha."

the way you moaned her name, breathlessly like that coaxed a sound of her own. your fingers tangled on her hair to makeshift a ponytail, so her hair wouldn't get in the way. she released your skin with a pop and claimed your lips, kissing you like she never did before — as if trying to pour all the love she had for you in the kiss. you slowly got a handle of the whole thing. you reached up to take off her bra, and yet she didn't break the kiss. only when you got impatient, whimpering as the ache between your legs became unbearable.

"i need you," you murmur, clearing your throat, lips tingling due the intense kissing. "please, Nat. make me yours."

god, yes. she was never letting you go. not before, and certainly not now.

"i will." she says huskily. she moves, so she's straddling one of your thighs, but not putting her weight on you. "tell me to stop whenever you want to,"

her pointer finger put your panties aside and jeez, that was torturous. you didn't want that fabric there anymore. but she was teasing. but that all flew away from your thoughts when you gasped, her middle and ring finger suddenly entering your hole — thumb lazily rubbing your clitoris, all of that with one hand, her other arm resting next to your head to support her weight on the bed. you instinctively reached out to hold her arm, eyes embarrassingly rolling to the back of your head. being masturbated by someone else was so perfectly good, nothing compared to doing it alone.

"oh, my.." you coo, head falling back against the pillow as your breathing quickly got laboured.

"you like that, detka?" she asks, eyeing you down almost possessively, silently promising herself she would never allow anyone to see you like that, touch you like that ever again. she curls her fingers against your g-spot, making you nod desperately.

"yes, yes yes." you gasp once more, biting on your lip and bucking your hips up towards her hand. she could tell you were getting close, you made it obvious. "don't stop,"

"my, my princess. already gonna cum for me?" she gently teases and increases the pace, doing her best to get through your clenching walls — getting another pleasured moan from you. "that quick?"

"i can't.. can't hold it, Nat," your body suddenly shudders forward, shuddering gasps coming out of your mouth as your juices coat her fingers, as they fuck you through your orgasm. it was nothing new, yet sharing it with her was definitely something else. "fuck, fuck.."

"good job, baby." she carefully pulls your panties down and throw them aside, leaning down to kiss your forehead. "that's it. i'm so proud,"

you just laid there, feeling the whole adrenaline from the new experience, letting yourself be pampered by her kisses and praises.

"hold on," your eyes snap open as she suddenly leaves you on the bed and grab something on the closet. you could've never had imagined she had it before, nor that she'd use it with you, in you, someday. a strap on. "i'm not done with you yet."

what was supposed to make you scared, the size, just got you more excited. watching her put it on was the hottest thing you ever saw, made your heartbeat go to the moon and back. and it was already hammering since the start.

"do you want to back off from this?" she whispers, now sounding genuinely concerned. you shook your head, grabbing onto her shoulders and pulling her closer.

"no, no. i trust you." you weakly confirms and she smiles. she takes one of your legs and presses it against your stomach, knee to your chest, revealing your totally drenched cunt to her. she grabbed your hip with the other hand and positioned herself.

the first inches were just fine, but you could saw it did hurt as much as she pushed inside you. you did your best to suppress your groans, but she saw it hurt. she knew it did. "shhh.. just a little bit more."

her stomach and breasts pressed against yours and she leaned her head down close to your own, pressing her cheek against your cheek, nuzzling gently, giving you all the time you needed to adjust to the size.

you felt so.. complete. filled up, by the woman you trusted the most. your arms wrapped around her shoulders when you got ready. you were so lubricated that it didn't bleed, it was just a discomfort that was soon over. "move."

with the green light, all of Natasha's self-restraint disappeared as her hands held your hips, then she began giving you slow, tiny thrusts. to introduce you to the whole thing — which you quickly became addicted.

moans surely echoed on the room when the feeling registered. it was good. it felt amazing.

"go faster," you plea, holding her body tighter to yours as your hips tried and matched her movements.

"so eager," she hisses and quickens the pace, to a point the headboard was already hitting the wall. her strong arms hold you in place as she fucks the little remains of purity out of you. "all mine now."

the tip of the fake cock brushes deeper each time she pounds into you, as you both discover the depths of your body together, as just as this new way of coming you never experienced before.

the familiar pit in your stomach slowly built tighter and got ready to snap, and she recognized that. her hand slid between your sweaty bodies to stimulate your clit a little bit more, and you were sure you moaned a little too loudly.

"Natasha!" your nails dig into her skin, as a toe curling wave of pleasure washes over you, once again.

"that's it, dorogaya," she nods, slowing down and allowing you to savour the feeling, watching you fall apart. your cum soaked the silicone material of the strap on, and honestly, the wet sounds it made got you a little embarrassed.

you weren't aware of your surroundings anymore, only that Natasha leaned her weight on you and held you close, still inside you. she rolled over to pull you on top of her, and stroked your hair, hearing the little moans you made.

"you're so perfect for me.." she coos, carefully pulling out of you, making you hiss as the material dragged across your extra sensitive walls. "you took me so well, my girl."

"thank you..." you mumble, shifting just to bury your face in the crook of her neck.

Natasha didn't want to talk right now. and she wouldn't. she just pulled the blankets over the two of you, giving you time — to feel, to think, to recompose. she sighed, and a wide smile showed on her face. she was glad you couldn't see it, she looked so giddy, so happy and so proud. she did something right. once.

Podrías hacerme este pedido: qué pasa con ella? Con Natasha, tu novia. Luego del Blip, se la paso distante -sin esa dulzura que mostraba contigo- o simplemente sin cumplir su papel de novia. Se la pasaba en su oficina, con la mirada perdida y en sus pensamientos - nunca te hablo de eso.

Podrías agregar que cambió cosas en su rutina, como por ej: antes la escuchabas en llamadas con los restantes vengadores, pero eso ya no pasa o la extrañas en tus sábanas - ahora se la pasa despierta.

Por último, el complejo, el cual previamente llamaron hogar y dónde intercambiaban risas o amor mutuo, paso a ser un espacio silencioso, tal vez sombrío, sin amor.

༉‧₊˚. 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐬𝐢𝐥𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐥𝐲

pairing . Natasha Romanoff x reader

summary . when Natasha met you, you brought the side of her she didn't know before — the happy, gentle, soft side. when something major happens, will she continue to be the girlfriend you deserve? will she allow her feelings and past to take you away from her?

warnings . the blip events, brief descriptions of Nat's past, cursing, yelling, breaking down, breaking up (?), angst.

notes . english is not my first language (🇧🇷) so i apologize for any spelling errors. this fic here is for my big sister @scarjosii22 who couldn't finish her story and asked me to do it for her.

divider credits: @sister-lucifer @i-mmaculatus

part two: loving you from afar (somewhere)

it was another day in which you stared at yourself in the mirror, after brushing your teeth, showering and braiding your hair before sleep — something she used to do. yeah, the dark circles under your eyes certainly grew bigger, that was for sure. a tsk comes out of your lips as you walk out of the bathroom, the only sound echoing through the pavement being your heavy steps.

perhaps you did it on purpose. a little sound was certainly missing in that place.

it had been five years, five years since she started blaming herself for not managing to stop Thanos — Natasha Romanoff, the only one with no superpowers, that had to rely only on her weapons and strength, blamed herself. you tried to talk to her about this, you had multiple conversations, and yet they seemed pointless. that woman was so goddamn stubborn, and never listened to you.

at some point, you'd certainly grow tired of that. and that point had co—

no, it didn't. you told yourself everyday you'd never give up on your relationship. you tried to remember the reason you fell in love with her over and over, to see if that would keep you grounded.

she protected me, she saved me, she showed me i could trust her, she showed me i was enough for her.

it was what she used to tell you, everyday, basically. when you got insecure, about the fact she was powerful and good at so many things, she reassured you you were the best thing that has ever happened to her. that you were the one that saved her. the light on her life.

maybe's just the fact that Natasha never had a relationship before you, so she didn't really know how it was to love and be loved back, or... she just didn't have any experience. but she did. she's a spy, and if there was an Avenger that knew about feelings it was her. you knew for a fact she was aware of how neglected you were becoming in your relationship, but for some reason she chose not to do anything about it.

you walked past the main gate — unfortunately, you had to pass through her office to get to your room — to see her eyes focused on the screen computer. again. watching the faces of the people who disappeared with the blip. you shook your head, sighing in frustration and pulling the computer's wire out of the socket. Natasha frowned, and the words that came out of her mouth cut deep.

"what's wrong with you!?"

"what's wrong with me?" you scoff back. "you're treating me as if i were some stranger, Natasha. i'm your partner. do you recall that?"

she completely ignores everything you say and narrow her eyes at you. she abruptly stands up from her chair and towers you. "i'm working. can't you fucking see that?"

your eyes widen in surprise and honestly, annoyance. it wasn't the first time you confronted her on the week and it wasn't gonna be the last either. "you saw those goddamn slides for a thousand times already, and literally! do you think staring at them will bring them back? keep dreaming, then,"

that statement intrigued her. she took a step back, wrapping her arms around herself, gulping audibly. her only answer was to turn the computer on again and turn her back on you.

"good night, Natasha." you tell her, not realizing the one tear rolling down your face. "i'm going to sleep now."

and with that, you took the elevator to the dormitories floor and entered your shared room with her, practically throwing your slippers away and tucking yourself under the covers, the cold, empty sheets.

you missed her there. god, you did. your body subconsciously snuggled up against the blanket as you grabbed the pillow that once belonged to to her, and held it tightly. and you just, cried.

༉‧₊˚. ★

Natasha didn't sleep, those weren't news. she stayed the night on the sofa of her office, staring at the big glass window there. the colour pallette of the garden outside reminded her of herself. dark green, grey, navy blue, and black. the nature was already dead because no one bothered to go outside and take care of the plants.

she couldn't brush away the thought of the similarity between that and your situation with her. you were drowning, and she wasn't even trying to pull you out.

the compound was empty. no more jokes. no more laughter. no more the Avengers and certainly no more Natasha. the russian woman thought of that as a punishment for her uselessness. she was purposefully dragging herself away from you, so with that you'd probably find another partner, someone else who wasn't broken like her, that could give you the love you so desperately needed. or, a tiny, tiny piece of her wanted someone to suffer like her, to feel everything she felt. but that wasn't something she was going to admit. was it?

so she just laid back against the backrest and stared at the ceiling, trying to calm down her racing thoughts but failing.

some of the superheroes tried to get in touch with her by the communication channels, but she wasn't accepting the calls. she'd given up on leading the Avengers. it wasn't her job anyway.

her best friend, Clint, was out there killing people like she once did. Steve had a support group for the people who didn't snap, but she thought it was bullshit to join. so she lived within the four walls of the office, trapped, unable to get out.

༉‧₊˚. ★

the saliva you swallowed dragged across your sore throat, making you hiss out of pain. this morning, you were trying— no, you were determined to give yourself a good time, regardless of that sounding insane on the current circumstances. a girlfriend who didn't love you anymore and half of the world gone? what a great way of living.

you searched inside the pantry for the strawberry tea and made yourself a cup, heating it on the microwave. you leaned against the counter and waited for it to get ready. while waiting, you took a moment to glance around. you smiled when your eyes landed on a specific plushie resting on a corner. a turtle plushie you and Natasha used to take care of together.

when the microwave clicked, you grabbed the tea and took a sip of it, the strawberry flavor, along of the warmth of it were a momentary relief, for all the mess going on there. speaking of mess, it was the definition of the person who had just walked in the kitchen.

"good morning, Nat," you murmur, attempting to be friendly. "i made myself some tea. would you like so—"

"just here to get some aspirin." she quickly, roughly cuts you off, opening the cabinet and searching through it. instead of taking one, she opened the bottle and turned it on her mouth, taking all the pills at once.

your eyes widened. what the hell was she doing? trying to dope herself and not even hiding? your feet moved faster than you as you grabbed her chin with one hand, as your other one practically punched her on the back, making her cough all the pills out.

instead of speaking, you take a moment to process what just happened. you frustratedly run your fingers through your hair, pacing around the kitchen. "look. if you don't want to have a good day, that's fine by me. but if you're not giving me a good day, at least allow me to have it myself. please?"

"i'm minding my business," she coughs out, dull eyes looking into yours. "you don't have to get in my way."

"you literally almost killed yourself in front of me!" you snap, a sudden rush of anger washing over you. "what the fuck do you expect me to do in a situation like that, huh? do you want me to sit here and enjoy the freaking view, to watch you as you slip away from me!?''

Natasha's body involuntarily shake as you yell. she didn't like yelling. it was what triggered the tears pooling on the corners of her eyes.

"tell me, Natasha. what do i have to do for Thanos to snap me away too!?" you scoff and throw the porcelain cup on the skin, the sound of the shards shattering filling the place. "because i really wish i disappeared too. would you like that?"

you breath heavily after the outburst, eyes watching as her body sunk down to the floor. her eyes were wide in fear and shock. it wasn't a pleasant view. you gulp and walk towards her. "i'm sorr—"

"get away!" she yells back, stumbling backwards as if you were some monster. "leave me fucking alone!"

"Natasha, i don't wanna hurt you—" you try again, frowning and trying to reach out for her.

loud sobs escapes the redhead, and she doesn't try to suppress them. she body is a mess autopilot working and everything is way too confusing for you to understand. she buries her face in her hands and refuses your comfort. so you sit on the floor as well, leaning against the cold wall but keeping a good distance between you two — hearing her cries.

༉‧₊˚. ★

the tension was palpable between the two of you. you were way too tired to have another pointless conversation with her, so you stayed quiet. it was already night again, 6pm precisely, and neither of you had left the kitchen. when you looked to the side, you saw Natasha's eyes still open. she was still listening.

"i'm still here," you begin, lifting your hand up and staring at the ring on your finger. "loving you silently."

Natasha's eyes barely flicker with the sound of your gentle voice. but she stays quiet.

"i still imagine myself getting hugged by you. having your kisses. having your body close. having you close. i miss all of that. i miss when you listened to me," you chuckle humorlessly, grabbing a shard of porcelain and fidgeting with it. "i miss my Natasha."

"stop," she quietly pleads, squeezing her eyes shut. "please stop."

"you're so selfish. you became so selfish." you sigh, weakly standing up. you open the sink faucet and throw a little bit of fresh water on your face. "trying to protect yourself, trying not to face the truth. you don't even think about me anymore."

when she doesn't speak, you continue.

"i could help. i helped you before, didn't i? i helped you with everything you ever asked me for. i helped here, your team, because i'm good at what i do. that's why Tony hired me. because i was good for all of you. i got a room in the Avengers Compound. but this?" you gesture around. you raise your voice again, but not yelling — just as if you wanted somewhere to hear. "this seems like a haunted house! where's all the people in here!?"

Natasha stands up, her red baggy eyes looking into yours as she pointed a finger at you. "it's not gonna change. there's no point in trying to."

"really? you don't say," you laugh dryly and shrug your shoulders. "i realized that a long time ago."

you take a deep breath, shaking your head. you had no tears left to cry, really. you shed so much for her, and for everything around you. the next thing you did surprised Natasha — but not as much as she thought it would.

you carefully slip the ring out of your finger and placed it on her hand, folding her fingers around it. your lips pressed on a thin line. "i love you, Natasha. i always will."

she clears her throat, feeling her eyes begin to burn again.

"when you become the Natasha i love again, please let me know."

part two: loving you from afar (somewhere)

(aí está, @scarjosii22. espero que você goste dessa, e espero que você pegue as referências do chá, e da tartaruga 🐢🍓)

₊˚⊹♡ 𝐚 𝐬𝐰𝐞𝐞𝐭 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐞

— ₊⊹ 𝒑𝒂𝒊𝒓𝒊𝒏𝒈 . WandaNat x fem! virgin! reader

— ₊⊹ 𝒔𝒖𝒎𝒎𝒂𝒓𝒚 . [based on this request.] Natasha and Wanda's relationship was going well... when talking generally. — they completed each other. but something was still missing. and there was no better person to reach out to, other than you, their closest friend. will you allow them to show you a whole new concept of.. love?

— ₊⊹ 𝒘𝒂𝒓𝒏𝒊𝒏𝒈𝒔 . smut! i am not responsible for your content consumption! — established relationship, soft doms WandaNat, subby reader, little bit of angst on the begining if you look very closely, swearing, reader's first time, threesome, making out, Wanda's enchanted strap, breast play (r receives), penetration (r receives), oral (N receives), multiple orgasms, cum eating, pet names, aftercare.

— ₊⊹ 𝒏𝒐𝒕𝒆𝒔 . english is not my first language (🇧🇷) so i apologize for any spelling errors! feedback is highly appreciated!! <3

never thought it was so hard to write a threesome 😭

divider credits: @anitalenia . ݁₊

small droplets of sweat started to build on Wanda's hairline, ready to roll down — soft pants and huffs leaving her mouth as she desperately tries to increase the pace, the pace that was already fast — she tries to accelerate even more. to get Natasha there, like she always did. but for some reason, it wasn't working. it wasn't being of any use. no matter how she tried to change positions, or angles.. Natasha just breathed heavily, with no result.

"stop, stop.." Natasha pants out and pats Wanda's shoulder, multiple times. "stop, baby. 'ts okay."

the woman reluctantly slows down her movements and groans, a mixture of tiredness and frustration.. and a little bit of sadness. right now, she was feeling so, so incapable, worthless. since when did that happen? since when a woman couldn't even bring her girlfriend an orgasm?

eventually, she pulls the strap out of her, making Natasha hiss quietly due sensitivity. she turns on her back and removes the strap off herself, waving her hand to disenchant it. her hand reaches out and puts the toy on the nightstand. the witch's eyes squeeze tight, clearing her throat as she does her best to catch her breath again.

Natasha of course, didn't need Wanda to tell her how she was feeling. as a spy, and like anybody else in this situation, she knew it. the russian weakly turns on her side and wraps her arm around Wanda's waist, placing her head on her shoulder and looking up into her eyes. deep down, both of them knew this wasn't physical.. it was phychological. lately, whenever it came to sex, both their minds couldn't completely focus on each other — and it wasn't fault of either of them. their toughts always wandered to her, that girl.. you.

"i'm sorry," Wanda whispers, wrapping her arms around Natasha and pulling her to herself. she sighs heavily and nuzzles into her soft red locks. "i'm sorry."

her heart was at war. battling to decide between giving into her desires, or holding back, in respect to Natasha. she just didn't know that the russian felt the same way. both of them did towards you. you're their closest friend, not an avenger, but an ordinary girl. thinking about that, it made sense — two people with a fucked up past, heavy emotional baggage, needed someone like you in their lives. someone soft, gentle, almost innocent, to say at least. the way you dressed, the way you smelled. always captivated the redheads. in the middle of all the chaos they called life, you were their beautiful, sweet escape of routine.

"don't apologize." Natasha replies, voice low and husky as she traces imaginary patterns on Wanda's chest. "i can't read minds like you do, so why don't you tell me what you're thinking about?"

Wanda chuckles at the remark, and turns her head to look at her girlfriend. she takes a slow, shaky breath again. she knows she can't hide anything from Natasha, and wouldn't try to. "look. can you listen to everything i got to say, before making any conclusions or saying anything else?"

Natasha nods, giving her a small, genuine smile, that showed patience. so Wanda started talking again.

"it's.. it's not easy to talk about this, i admit. it's like a taboo, and stuff.. we've been together for three years now, and i love you. i love you so much. i always tell you that and i always mean it. we help each other, we work together, you're the perfect fit for me, Nat. but.. lately, i've been thinking a lot about.."

"i know." Natasha interrupts anyway, and her smile doesn't vanish. "i know you have. i see it. and god, I think about her too."

surprise immediately shows in Wanda's wide eyes, and she exhales the air she was holding. relief washed over her being, even if Natasha hadn't elaborated yet.

"Wanda, darling." she chuckles, nuzzling closer and placing her hand on the woman's cheek. "we struggle sometimes. and it's not our fault. she's a ray of sunshine. it's everything we need, don't you think?"

"are you saying that we should consider.." Wanda says, in a softer tone.. her hand finds it's way to Natasha's back, nails tracing her spine. the mere thought already got her in a better mood. "inviting.. her.. in?"

"yeah." Natasha bits on her bottom lip. both of them had never tried a threesome before, but it seemed like a good idea. it felt like a good idea. if they both had thoughts and maybe even feelings for you, why don't act on them? "let's invite her tomorrow. tomorrow night."

"oh, Natasha." Wanda chuckles, understanding the implication. she leans down to peck Natasha's lips, and looks at her with a new sparkle in her eyes. "are you sure? completely sure about this? i never, ever want to hurt you, or make things weird between us—"

"we trust her. and basically, the only reason that we've been failing is because we want her and don't act on it." Natasha raises her eyebrows and pokes Wanda's nose, then wraps her arms around her neck. "and also. she's not a child. we'll talk about everything, and if it doesn't work out, we'll just seek another solution."

they both stay silent for a moment, and Wanda agrees. she giggles to herself, pulling the blankets over them and snuggling against Natasha, their legs tangling. they went to sleep happily, the tension from before eased because of you. they would just wait for the next day, and hope for the best.

₊˚⊹♡

the word to describe what you were feeling in that moment was: anticipation.

Natasha and Wanda had never invited you over to their place like this: at night, with no special occasion. they had told you they wanted to see you again, and to talk about a few things. you had absolutely no clue about what it was, so jumping to the most probable conclusion was what you did: a casual catch up.

yeah, for sure.

Wanda was the one to open the door after you knocked, and she shamelessly looked at you from head to toe, which got your eyes to snap open. you cleared your throat as she took in the sight of you, in a small, pink dress that covered just a little more than your ass — hair falling down your shoulders, a light makeup.

"Natasha," she calls out, tilting her head towards you. "you gotta see this,"

okay, you were so confused. first, one of your friends that was taken, clearly looks at you in a not so friendly way, and now, she's calling her girlfriend to do the same? you stand there, flustered, a little disoriented.

the other redhead comes. she opens the door wider so she could see you better, and stops in track when her eyes land on your figure. they exchange looks, and silently communicate — as if saying, why didn't we think of this before?

"come in, sweetheart." the russian says and allows you inside the house, closing the door right after.

you observe as the two of them talk between themselves, quickly finishing so they could return their attention to you. they notice how nervous the greeting had made you, and decide to get straight to the business. they sit on the couch, letting a little space between them and patting on it, so you could sit. you place your purse on the entrance counter and chuckle nervously, then walk towards them and sit where they wanted you to.

"so... hi!" you finally speak, still feeling a little awkward. "uhm.. is everything okay with you two?"

"absolutely." Wanda nods, shifting on her seat. her knee brushes against yours as she places her hand on your cheek, thumb caressing your jawline. "you just look so beautiful right now, we couldn't resist."

as she speaks, Natasha's hand lands on your thigh, and you were absolutely sure you looked redder than a tomato right now. but it still felt wrong. you gently placed your hand above both of theirs to still their touches.

"i don't get it."

"alright, dorogaya. that's the whole reason we invited you over." Natasha says and Wanda nods, allowing the russian to explain. "first, we want you to know that is absolutely alright if you don't feel comfortable with this. you can just say 'no' and leave, we're not forcing you into something you don't want to."

by this moment, just with those vague words, combined with their previous actions, you had a slight idea of what this was about, and it made you shiver. ever since you met them, you had a little crush on both, but they were avengers. superheroes, powerful, and older than you. they're gorgeous women that unfortunately were taken— well, you felt lucky just for having their friendship.

"we've been thinking about you. a lot." Natasha admits with a deep breath and purposefully scoots closer, making you almost a little sandwich with them. "the way you talk to us.. the way you look at us whenever we're together."

"like right now. the way your eyes are sparkling." Wanda breathes, her arms sneaking around your waist and her chin on your shoulder.

"you're so perfect.. so precious to us, detka." Natasha whispers and wraps her arms around you too, tilting her head and pressing a kiss on Wanda's forehead, then on yours. "so we want to know, if you're okay with trying out with us."

a deep sigh leaves you, and you melt like a puddle between the women. your weight leans on Wanda's body, and your eyes travel from one to the other. your defenses vanished, completely, and the thought of this being.. uncommon, was buried deep down in your mind.

"trying out?" your voice sounds more like a whimper, and your hand grabs Natasha's wrist, that still rested on your thigh.

"yeah.. trying out." Wanda whispers on your ear, her hand turning your hair into a makeshift ponytail, exposing your neck for them. "just for tonight.. then we'll give you time to think."

"but i never.." you stutter, feeling Natasha's warm breath on your neck, as her lips began trailing kisses there — right above your pulse. "i-i've never.."

"it's okay." Wanda breathes in your ear, watching as Natasha took her sweet time to taste you, feel the softness of your skin. "we're gonna take care of you."

"i never.. i never had.." you continue, voice becoming weaker and weaker. "i never went beyond kisses.."

that was new information. Natasha slowly pulled away from your neck and exchanged a look with Wanda. so you were still a virgin. that just turned them on even more. they'd be the first ones to play with you, make you their good girl.

"god, sweetheart." the witch purrs, her hands cupping your waist and giving it a little squeeze. "you have no idea what you're doing to us."

the action coaxes a soft, needy sound out your throat, head lolling backwards against her shoulder.

"please, baby. let us have you." Natasha begs. you don't gotta be asked twice.

₊˚⊹♡

the room was dark — burgundy walls, the yellow light of the dim lamp casting on the furniture and being the only source of illumination. you couldn't put in words the way you felt. Natasha, naked, the freckles on her pale skin on display for you. toned breasts, muscular arms. red hair naturally wavy, not straightened like she usually had it. she looked like a true goddess. her gaze, hungry yet tender, had you frozen in place.

Wanda's hands guided you towards the bed — her chest against your back, an amused chuckle leaving her. you looked so innocent. it was clear you never even thought of the possibility of that.

"look at her," Wanda coos. Natasha's eyes remain glued on you, but travel to your body as Wanda starts to slowly get that dress off you. her pointer and thumb pull the zipper down and the straps fall down your shoulders, revealing your bra. she kisses your shoulder and places her palms flat on your stomach, letting them roam downwards, to your hips, and pulling the pink fabric of the dress down, as it pools around your feet. the woman hum together in satisfaction, being allowed to see your half-naked body. "such a precious little thing. now go with Nat and watch me strip."

you couldn't help but blush a little bit under their gaze, and the way they were addressing to you. doing as you're told, you climb on the bed, and Nat spreads her legs. your heart hammers against your ribcage. she only did that so you could lay against her chest, but accidentally — or not — your eyes landed on her intimacy, and the slick arousal that was almost dripping down her thighs.

"oh my god, Natasha." you moan, allowing her to pull your back against her chest. she smirks, unclasping your bra and tossing it aside.

now, it's Wanda's turn to get the unnecessary clothes off her. she firstly discard her blouse, then her jeans, and lingerie — she uses her foot to kick the pile of clothes away, and walks to the nightstand, opening the drawer and pulling out the.. toy. it does get you a little tense. but they had a way of showing you there was no reason to be. with a wave of her hand, the strap is enchanted, and she will be able to feel everything. everything she dreamed of with you.

"we will take good care of you, kotenok." Natasha whispers and grabs your chin, tilting your head up — and kissing you.

a kiss never felt so good. throughout your whole life, you never had a kiss like this one — warm, slow, needed. her tongue mingled with yours, slender fingers tangling in your hair to keep you in place. Wanda watches with a hungry, almost predatory gaze as she sees her two favourite women making out. she climbs on the bed with you and hooks her fingers on the waistband of your panties, pulling them down — your hips instinctively lifting to make her work easier. you were slowly letting yourself go.

Natasha releases your lips, panting. her hands pull you back even more against herself, pressing your body against hers and go to your breasts, kneading the skin, slowly, massaging them, knowing exactly how to pleasure you. you moan sweetly, throwing your head back against her shoulder as her fingers pinch your hard nipples.

"that's it, baby." Wanda hums, satisfied with the scene. she liked that you were comfortable with them, which meant she could do everything she wanted.

you don't even realize as they start to adjust your body, the positions — Natasha brings her knees up and spread them a little, Wanda bringing your legs around Natasha's, so you were completely spread and open.

"oh, fuck." she says, knees digging into the mattress as she takes a good look between your legs. "such a beautiful pussy. can't believe we're the only ones to have it."

her words make you gasp, and your back arches a little — but before you could do anything, her cock was already stretching you out, with little effort. the woman groans, placing her hands on your waist and hovering you. she leans up and kisses Natasha, a low chuckle leaving her as she whispers. "so warm and wet. she's a perfect girl."

"we're not gonna let you go," Natasha whispers in your ear. her arms wrap around your waist, securing you, and with that, Wanda starts moving.

her movements are gentle — not too slow, not too fast, showing you how it was to be deliciously filled up. the new, foreign sensations consume you, breath coming out in soft gasps. your eyes look at the redhead who was fucking you, half-lidded, in pure bliss, adoration. the strap drags up your sensitive walls, until the tip was the only thing inside of you, then pushes back in, discovering spots you had never found before with your own fingers.

"oh my god," you grip Wanda's shoulder with one hand, and intertwine your fingers of the free hand with one of Natasha's that held your waist. your hips buck upwards, matching the movements with Wanda's cock pounding inside you. "feel so good,"

"you're so tight, detka," Wanda mutters, feeling her climax starting to build up. she had to speed up, had to feel you more, clenching around her so perfectly.

"s-shit... ah.." you moan and arch your back, doing your best not to fall apart that quickly. but Natasha doesn't allow you to hold back.

her hand slides down your stomach, to where Wanda was connected with you, and starts to rub lazy circles on your clitoris, looking up at her girlfriend with a satisfied smirk. "you can come for us,"

"i'm close too," Wanda moans, head lolling back as she grips your hips tighter, chasing after her so needed release, which doesn't take long to come.

your vision starts to blur a little, not being able to focus on anything specific. your eyelids fall shut, and all the sounds around fade — the first real orgasm you ever had washing over you. an almost pornographic moan echoes on the room, coming from your throat, and your legs tremble around Natasha's — cum coating Wanda's strap, juices rolling down your legs and mixing with Natasha's who was under you. Wanda's climax comes right after and she quickly pulls out, painting your stomach white as you laid there, dumb and cute, drained.

Wanda rolls on her back and closes her eyes, the high still present. she hadn't felt that good in so, so long, she had missed it so much. now it's Natasha's turn to take control.

she carefully lays you down next to her and licks Wanda's release from your stomach, missing the taste of it. she takes some on her fingers and point them at your mouth. "open up,"

you blush softly, opening your mouth and welcoming Natasha's fingers in. your tongue swirls around her digits, swallowing obediently.

"good job, malyshka." she praises, cradling the side of your head and pressing a kiss on your forehead. you look at her up and down, then weakly sits up on the bed.

"wanna taste you too, Natty," you say, and it drives her crazy.

undoubtedly, Natasha was more than dripping, and yes, she wanted you to teach you how to eat a woman out. she leans back against the headboard of the bed and intertwines her fingers with her tired girlfriend, winking down at her. she spreads her legs. "come over here, princess."

your legs, still shakily, dig into the mattress and you settle yourself on your knees, hands holding Natasha's thighs apart as your face approaches her core. she was so sensitive and achy.. and you'd repay her, for everything she had done. it shocked her, you didn't show inexperience — your tongue licked a long strip, slipping between her folds and brushing inside her, stimulating her g-spot and making her mouth agape. her fingers gently tug on your hair, pulling you closer, pressing your face against her cunt. your nose brushes her clit, and it doesn't take long for Natasha to cum too.

"oh, malyshka.." she stutters out between moans and whimpers, hips bucking upwards as she released. "s-such a.. perfect.. mhm.. girl.."

you swallow her sweet juices, pressing a kiss on her inner thigh and pulling your face back. just by watching both of their expressions, a tired and proud expression showed on your face, knowing you did a great job.

₊˚⊹♡

now, the digital clock on the nightstand showed 2AM. the sheets were crumpled, blankets all over the floor, long forgotten. you laid there, naked and vulnerable on the bed, waiting for Wanda and Natasha to come back to the room.

when they did, they were both wearing silky robes — Natasha held aspirin and a bottle of water, and Wanda, a cloth, and an additional robe that they hoped would fit you.

they walk towards you and Natasha places the items on the nightstand, sitting on the edge of the bed. she carefully handles your body and pulls you onto her lap, holding you closely, your side against her chest. you felt warm again, fuzzy, happy.

"you were perfect, sweetheart." Wanda smiles, carefully spreading your legs and using the cloth to clean the sticky cum still there. you whimper, feeling a little stingy and sore.

"we got aspirin for tomorrow, in case you need it." Natasha grabs the water bottle and opens it, bringing it up to your lips, helping you sip on it. "there you go..."

"now, we'll sleep. and tomorrow we are gonna prepare you a nice warm bath." Wanda chuckles and puts away the cloth, closing your legs afterwards.

you all settle on the bed comfortably again, having to grab the blanket from the floor and cover you up. you sigh softly, lying between them and gathering courage to speak.

"was this just... a playtime?"

that question was expected, and they were ready for it. they sweetly smile and replied in sync.

"you are our missing piece."

para o anon que fez o pedido: mto mto obrigada!! eu sei que adicionei várias coisas, porém eu precisava de um contexto para encaixar o seu pedido. espero que tenha ficado bom! 🥹

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳ 𝐨𝐮𝐭𝐬𝐢𝐝𝐞 𝐨𝐛𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐯𝐞𝐫

— ₊⊹ 𝒑𝒂𝒊𝒓𝒊𝒏𝒈 . Natasha Romanoff x reader

— ₊⊹ 𝒔𝒖𝒎𝒎𝒂𝒓𝒚 . in which she finally feels heard, seen.

— ₊⊹ 𝒘𝒂𝒓𝒏𝒊𝒏𝒈𝒔 . angst, emotional breakdown (panic attack), swearing, mentions of scars (sh), mentions of suicidal ideologies. Nat being honest and open about her feelings for once. hurt/comfort.

— ₊⊹ 𝒏𝒐𝒕𝒆𝒔 . english is not my first language (🇧🇷) so i apologize for any spelling errors. rainy days, match sad stories. venting.

divider credits: @saradika-graphics ༉‧₊˚.

the heaviness of the afternoon air settled over Natasha — weighting down what was already heavy. her mind, her body.. everything felt like a weight, a weight she carried since she was born, or even before her soul was incarnated in her body. she felt— no, she knew that she was born in bad news, cursed, and there was no way of getting out of this. it's funny, those were the exact same thoughts she had ever since she was a child— 10, 11, maybe? and in that age, crossed her mind that probably when she grew up, those ideas would vanish and she would be free to have a normal life.

but that certainly didn't happen. and now, she found herself trapped. trapped in web that the more she struggled, more stuck she got, and that was a routine that repeated over and over and over — optimistic, optimistic delusional thoughts that came to battle with the bad ones, telling her that things would someday be okay, and the real, coherent ones, that crushed all the hope, the little sparkle of hope she had within her, making her mind a complete and total mess. chaos behind chaos. sleepless nights, restless days.

god, how good would it be if at least, her body wasn't enchanted. how perfect would it be, to throw herself down a building and don't feel anymore, instead of having just a few scratches here and there. the blade helped, even with the acknowledge that a normal person would feel 10 times more than she did. because the pain was still little, when comparing to everything this woman already endured. the red lines on her arms and thighs were just a reminder of the red on her ledge, and that it was now impossible to wipe away.

in moments like those ones, her brain desperately searched for any solution, any thought to refute her current state — it was the human instinct to survive. (yeah, she's human). her eyes squeeze tight, feet stumbling forward and hands gripping tightly the trailer's window rail, knuckles turning white.

inhale, exhale. inhale— no, let's stick to panting.

her mind would drift back to the little girls who she shared her life with in the red room, remembering each of their personalities, what each one of them would do in a situation like this. ironically, for Natasha, they deserved to be listened and helped. but herself? nah. but in the deep end, she didn't know if they were still breathing, still in this world. what was the point..?

"come on..." she mutters, hissing loudly as her legs start trembling, knees ready to give up. "stop, stop, stop, stop..."

her heart never felt so filled with anguish and pain like right now — yes it did, but it was always like that: whenever that happened, the past experiences felt like they never existed — and the now felt like too much to handle. her ears buzzed, the sounds of the wind blowing across the tree leaves around her went down to volume zero — the hair on her legs and arms went up in a deep shiver, and eyes went wide — realization.

the same fucking realization as always. nobody listens, nobody cares. no one will ever know her true story. no one will ever fix her. she won't be remembered. her life's a waste— why was she even born, when everything that happened was disgrace after disgrace. that's when the thread snaps, and her body reacts before her mind can follow.

her throat closes, as if suffocating — body falling backwards, hitting the floor with full force. her fingers run through her hair and tug on the strands, pulling them strongly, even breaking a few of the auburn locks. tears of desperation threatens to fall down her cheeks, but she doesn't really realize that yet. she's just so out of air, that's impossible to control any other action.

"why won't that fucking—" Natasha manages between gasps. she groans, grabbing on the skin of her thighs and squeezing them harshly, creating moon-shaped little marks, enough to draw blood. "won't it— stop!"

then, she sobs. wait, but.. why did it felt like.. relief? perhaps because now, she was in your arms.

a foreign, strange sensation of warmth, warmth of another human being, enveloped her. she didn't recognize who it was, nor did she care. with pure instinct, her arms wrapped around the person's midsection, clinging for dear life. and now, with the sense of security, she was able to cry freely. she cried silently, something you didn't like. her chest heaved with emotion, but you wished she was louder. she was taught that widows didn't feel pain, wether it was physical or emotional. that's why her small cries sounded as painful and miserable as loud ones. you, sitting on the floor with her, scooped her weeping frame into your arms and held her — her side against your chest, head tucked in the crook of your neck.

sadly, it wasn't the first time, and you knew it wouldn't be the last. you were always in the trailer with her when she had breakdowns like this one. and that was what broke you the most — her brain subconsciously would tell her she was alone, and she didn't know how to deal with intense feelings like those: thus, she didn't know how to ask for help, how to come to you so you both could prevent those mental draining episodes.

when you first met Natasha, the first thing she asked you was to forget that she was a deadly spy, an avenger, or whatever the hell else people knew her as. at least for a day, so you could see where things would go. this fact only, meant that since the beginning, she had a feeling about you.. one she couldn't quite put a finger on, but which made her want to be herself, with no masks or titles around you.

it was common sense everything she went through. but only you knew about her true point of view. when her own self felt like an outside observer regarding to her own life, you were always there to remind her of who she was.

"you're safe... you're safe, i am safe.. we're both safe.." you whisper, running your hand up and down her shivery arm, putting the cold away. "okay, Nat? you are safe. i am right here, ready to fight whatever evil that befalls you.''

"i don't know.. i-i just.. i'm exhausted... i'm s-so tired.." she manages between small cries, eyes pleadingly looking up into yours. her hand reaches out and intertwine her fingers with your own, grasping on every sense she had of your presence — because she knew it could fade again, that she could fall in the loop again. and it was torturous. "i never.. no one ever listened to me... i never.. told anyone.. about.. a-about..."

"i know." you nod, arms tightening around her. you crawl a little backwards, just so you could reach the blanket that laid upon the couch and grab it. you wrap it around her with one hand, not letting go of her own. she subconsciously brings the fluffy fabric closer to herself and snuggles up against your body. "but you can tell me. isn't it clear, malyshka? that you're stuck with me?"

malyshka. the endearment term in russian she had taught you. she loved it, so goddamn much. a little weak smile tugs on her lips, the kindness you were showing her easing the tension — as if you were offering to carry the weight with her. compassion, empathy. so foreign.

"i just.." she shakes her head, sniffling and taking a deep, shaky breath. she stays silent for a few minutes, and you wait. voice so quiet, small.. and scared. "before you.. no one ever.. held me. i never had anyone holding me. i never had a touch that didn't mean harm. never had anyone to listen."

"i know, Nat. and that pains me more than you think." you confirm, running your fingers through her hair, and nuzzling the side of your face against her cheek, resting on your shoulder. "but trust me, i will listen for hours, days, years and centuries. if you wanna share every single second of your life with me, i'm here to listen."

"that doesn't make any freaking sense to me." she chuckles humorlessly, a soft groan escaping her throat. she was feeling a little tired. "but.. the truth is.. few people understand what i went through. the little people who lived in the same circumstances as me are probably all dead.. and... i truly don't want you to understand. i don't want you to try and live the same horrors as i did. all i wish for..."

you take a moment to stare at her when she pauses. hurt arms, tear filled face. oh, what you wouldn't do to protect this heart. to keep it safe. never let anything harm it again.

"all i wish for, is for you to be here. to hold me like you're doing, to share your own experiences with me, to live with me. to whisper sweet nothings in my ear by the night. handle my body gently. just be here. be here and i know i'll be forever safe."

that was it. everything you ever wished for. you exhale deeply and shift her carefully, so she was on your lap. she looks down at you, and at your hand.. that slowly comes up to land on her cheek. she leans against it and breathes heavily. you smile, waiting for her next expected words.

"can i..." she clears her throat, hands shyly gripping your shoulders, eyes looking at you from below her eyelashes. "can i cry more?"

"of course." you cradle her again and settle her thighs around your hips. her arms wrap around your neck, and she gently leans her head on your shoulder... allowing herself to cry.. out of relief.

your right hand tenderly caresses her leg, tracing over the self indulged scars she had. the left one, makes slow, soothing circles on her spine, moving up, and down her back. she was letting all her emotions out, all the pain inside her heavy heart, was flowing out of her being. thanks to your patience, your gentleness, and your love.

turns out, love wasn't only for children. goodness gracious, how good it was to be loved...

"god," she sobs, squeezing you tighter, nose brushing against your hair as she allows herself to.. let go. "god, i need you."

"i'm here." you confirm quietly, looking up and kissing her temple. "i'm here, i'm not going anywhere."

*The squad over at Steve’s house*

Thor: Ohhh, we each get our own oven?

Steve: …N-No…

Steve, laughing: How many ovens do you think I have???

Thor, motioning to the kitchen: Three, I thought!

Bruce: I see a—

Steve, motioning to one device: This is a microwave.

Thor: Oh, well I—

Steve: Hey wait, wait, actually- hang on- *fiddles with the buttons on the microwave*

Steve, amazed: It’s got a bake setting!

Clint: Ohoho, you learn something new everyday!

Tony: Do we- Do we roshambo for who gets to pick first?

Steve: Now I’ve just discovered I have more ovens than I thought, we don’t need to roshambo nothin!

Steve: I am someone who owns four ovens…

Steve, louder and way too happy: I am someone… who owns FOUR OVENS…

Steve: I didn’t know I was so rich with ovens…

Natasha, pointing to another appliance: Also the toaster oven!

Steve:

Thor: Ohhh, toasty boy! Four- Five ovens!

Steve:

Steve, fucking ECSTATIC: I AM SOMEONE WHO OWNS FIVE OVENS

i stg if tony stark dies in endgame I will snippity snap give my neck a crack 

Goodnight to the domestic avengers who are having a movie night rn and are all gonna fall asleep in a pile on the living room floor

Natasha: Lets go.

Tony: Wait, if you're here who's guarding Hades?

Clint: Run, bitch. RUN

^^ This is Tony BTW

Natasha: Lets go.

Tony: Wait, if you're here who's guarding Hades?

Clint: Run, bitch. RUN

incorrect marvel quotes 5

Wanda: Can you really put a price on love?

Natasha: yes you can,

Y/n: it's 20 dollars

Y/n: *running into the living with a smile* omg! Omg! Omg!

Natasha: *sitting on the couch with the rest of the avengers* what are you laughing about

Y/n: I changed Steve's ring tone

Tony: really?

Bucky: to what?

Y/n: *whispering* hold on

Steve:*walks in* hey guys

Y/n:*dialing on phone*hey stevie

Steve's phone:

Natasha: I bet they're together

Steve: what who?

Natasha: Bucky and y/n

Steve: why do you think that

Natasha: just look at them

*y/n sitting in buckys lap braiding his hair*

Steve: y/n does that to thor

Natasha: ok but look how content bucky looks

*not paying attention to anything but y/n*

Tony: *walks in* what are you guys talking about

Steve: Natasha thinks y/n and bucky are together

Tony: hold on i got an idea...

Tony: hey y/n can I ask you a question

Y/n: yeah go ahead *still playing with buckys hair:

Tony: what do bees make

Y/n: honey?

Bucky: yeah,baby doll

Natasha: *smirks*

Natasha : Why do you look like that?Bucky, laying face-first on the floor : Like what?

Natasha : Like you’re dead.

Bucky : It’s because I’m dying. Leave me here to perish.

Steve : Bucky accidentally called Sam “babe” in front of everyone today.

Bucky : *sobs into the floor*

no thoughts just natasha romanoff

Exploring explosions ~

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Series

Summary - While on a mission, something happens to bucky. On his journey to recovery, he finds something he wants more than life.

:⚠️warnings: talk of unconscious people, talks of torture and violence ⚠️:

Bucky x reader (no use of Y/N)

(Idk if this makes sense.. it makes sense to meee)

You watch from the back of the room, as 4-6 shield agents continue their 'interaction' it was torture not only to look at, but probably also to go throught, it was disturbing to watch, so you got up trying to make a little scene as your chair loudly scraps along the floor and to pick up your books, looking up and seeing mostly everyone even a couple agents in the room with him staring at you, so you left to head to your room, you slept in the compound most nights even thought you had a apartment. You threw your books on your desk as you walk towards the large window covering the whole back wall.

You fell backwards on your bed and stared at the ceiling. You were in your own world and didn't realise your phone was blowing up, you came back to reality when you heard a frantic knock at your door, getting up you unlocked it and a red headed assassin barged through before slamming he door shut and using all your 4 locks making sure she used them all. She was leaning on the door with her ear to it, listening. She swallowed dramatically. "I'm never gonna make fun of you for all your locks again." She said while sounding out of breath. You tried to listen to what she was running.. from?

"I don't hear anything.. what's going on?" You whispered as she slowly made her way to your bed, sitting at the foot of it.

"He just appeared like right there and.." she tried speaking but also trying to catch her breath." I walked in, trying to remind them you left, so it's over, but.. he was out. They were all dead or unconscious in his.. room.. he was just watching them..." she looked at you like she wouldn't believe herself, but she saw it, so she had to.

"And you ran here? To me, to the woman who hates, HATES violence, " you gave her a look on confusion. "OK, wasn't me best move, but I thought with your past.." she tried reasoning but gave up pretty quickly, you give a slow nod as you walked to your desk and relieved you grabbed some of the wrong papers. You turned your head, giving her a lovely smirk. "Guess what?" You choked out, but you were met with a defeated look. You just hum picking up the right papers and make piles before grabbing the wrong ones and heading towards the door with Nat praying behind you.

~~~

You giggle as tried defending herself - "So you're one of the more deadly assassins the red room even made.. but you're scared when he looked at you, and you just ran, not knowing if he was also running.. Hahaha, cmon Nat, it's funny, " you giggled as you reached for your badge as the bay was on lockout. Before you could swipe it, you got a weird feeling when you realised you weren't afraid of the wintersolider and weren't scared when Nat almost took out the door and told you her lovely story. You were going to say something but didn't and just swiped your badge with a beep. You shrugged as it took a while for the door to open. As it slowly opened, you went to take a step inside, and you stopped looking around.

You saw the room a mess desks and tables tipped papers everywhere, glass shards covering the floor, what looks like ripped clothing scattered through out the room, without thinking or even looking you slowly slip your hand towards a big red button "you believe me now?" You hear the shake in nats' voices before hitting the panic button. The room starts spinning as what you think is classical music plays in your head, your own world turned into a record player, and you were the record.

@sapphirebarnes @cjand10 @unaxv @scott-loki-barnes

WHO LIVES, WHO DIES, WHO TELLS YOUR STORY CHAPTER 12

Who Lives, Who Dies Who Tells Your Story

Natasha Romanoff x Fem!Reader

Summary: Natasha and Reader get into an accident that leaves Natasha in critical condition. When she wakes up, it’s revealed that she has amnesia and doesn’t remember her life, wife, or children.

Masterlist | General Masterlist

Follow my update page @natsxaddiction2

w/c:5.4k

Warning: Brief mentions of R’s time in HYDRA. 

Note: Sometimes Tumblr deletes entire paragraphs and sentences. You can read the chapters here on my a03

The grey light of dawn crept through the curtains, casting delicate shadows on the worn wooden floors of Natasha’s bedroom as she sat on the edge of the bed, a tangle of emotions twisted within her, threatening to consume her fragile heart. Her fingers gripped the photographs delicately. Today, was different. Today she had received something she’d never expected. Something that tore her world apart and made it whole again. Pictures of her mother, a woman she had never met before. A woman she only dreamed about. 

Natasha could only wonder what she was like. Was her voice as deep as hers? Did her eyes shine when she was happy? Did she have calloused hands or soft, delicate fingers only made for her? She wondered what their life was like. Did she have siblings? A father? A home? The longer she sat the more she thought. 

Her trembling hands clutched the photographs, each one a window into a past she had been denied. The images, yellowed with age and a touch wrinkled from years of neglect, revealed a woman whose eyes mirror her own. Whose hair fell on her shoulders the same way Natasha’s did when she allowed it to grow as long. Natasha switches between the two photos, admiring the woman inside of them. Her face adorned a bittersweet smile that hinted at a life filled with untold stories. 

The weight of guilt pressed heavily on Natasha’s chest. For years, she had harbored a deep-seated sense of shame, a belief that she was somehow unworthy of knowing her mother. Questions had plagued her thoughts like relentless echoes, but the answers remained elusive, lost in the murky depths of her tangled history. One she didn’t even know. A mix of joy and sorrow washed over her, the contradictory emotions leaving her overwhelmed and uncertain. She yearned to feel the warmth of her mother's embrace, to hear her voice whispering words of love and understanding. But alongside that longing came the knowledge that she had missed out on so much, that the years between them were an unbridgeable abyss of lost moments and untold stories.

The room felt suffocating as if the weight of her mother's absence had seeped into the very air she breathed. Natasha rose from the bed, the photographs clutched tightly in her hand and moved toward the window. She drew back the heavy curtains, exposing herself to the world outside. The forest skyline greeted her with a mixture of gloom and faded hope, a reflection of her inner turmoil. There was a thick layer of fresh snow covering the ground and trees. It’s Christmas and she’s here in her bedroom feeling sorry for herself. 

She leaned her head against the cold glass, hoping for a second to feel anything other than the emotions coursing through her. In this moment of vulnerability, Natasha realized that the photographs were not just a glimpse into her mother's life, but also a painful reminder of her fractured existence. The weight of her mother's absence threatened to consume her, the guilt of not knowing her tugging at her soul like an anchor dragging her down into the depths of despair. As she gazed at the images in her trembling hands, Natasha made a silent promise to herself. She would embark on a journey of discovery, a quest to unravel the secrets of her past. She knew it would not be easy, that the path ahead was shrouded in uncertainty and emotional turmoil. But she also knew that she owed it to herself and the woman in those photographs to uncover the truth, to find consolation in the answers she sought.  

She moves over to her bed, stuffing everything back into the package just as she found it before she walks over to the wall opposite her bed. She taps the paneling, wondering if she can trust her shotty memories, and the panel opens. It only does so with her fingerprint. There’s nothing inside this time. Just as she expected. She places the box inside and closes the panel again. She remains kneeling, breathing in and out, wiping the tears from her eyes. She hasn’t slept a wink. There might still be time to fall into a restless slumber before she has to wake up to be with the girls. She wouldn’t miss this moment for the world. She couldn’t. Natasha looks back to her bed, not at all ready to fall asleep, as she stands to her feet. She walks towards her bathroom instead. Her muscles still ache, her limbs are stiff, and her eyes are puffy and red from all of the cryings she’s done. 

This isn’t the way things are supposed to go. It’s not supposed to be like this. Yet it is. Because she’s made it so. Natasha ruins everything she touches. Right now in her haze of self-deprecation and guilt, Natasha can’t help but think of it as the truth. Why couldn’t she just stop thinking with her head? Forget about all of her reservations and talk to you. Talk to her wife. Why wouldn’t she stop being a coward?

Natasha stood in front of the mirror, her reflection a source of both familiarity and uncertainty. Her gaze met the piercing green eyes that stared back at her, searching for answers she feared she might never find. The weight of her past as a former spy pressed upon her shoulders, intertwining with the intricacies of her amnesia, creating a tangled web of doubt within her mind.

She leans over to splash water on her face. Her heart thudded in her chest as she wrestled with a decision that felt both monumental and terrifying. Should she confide in you, her partner and lover, about her feelings? Should she expose her vulnerability, and the fractures in her memory, and risk everything she’s been taught? Natasha's fingers traced the jagged scar on her hip, a silent reminder of the dangers she had faced in her former life. She had built walls around her heart, fortified by years of secrets and self-preservation. But now, as she stood on the precipice of rediscovering love, the fear of vulnerability threatened to shatter those walls and expose her to a pain she wasn't sure she could bear.

Her mind became a battlefield, torn between the instinct to protect herself and the desire to trust in the possibility of love. What if her amnesia prevented her from fully reciprocating your affection? What if the pieces of her past would forever haunt your relationship, whispering doubt into the spaces between your hearts?

A sense of longing surged within Natasha, a yearning to remember the love that had drawn her to you in the first place. She paced back and forth in her bedroom, the sound of her footsteps echoing in the silence. The weight of indecision pressed heavily upon her, threatening to drown her in a sea of uncertainty. But amidst the turmoil, a flicker of courage emerged, a voice urging her to take a leap of faith, to trust in the resilience of her heart. Natasha stopped in her tracks, her eyes drawn to the photograph on the mantel. She’d tried to ignore it in the little time she’s spent here. It captured a moment of stolen intimacy between her and you, your smiles radiant with the promise of a future filled with love. The photograph seemed to taunt her, a reminder of the passion she couldn't fully remember but could sense lingering in the depths of her being.

Taking a deep breath, Natasha steeled herself for the vulnerability that lay ahead. She walked across the hall with your bedroom in mind. She raised her hand to knock, wondering if she was doing the right thing before her fists land against the door in rapid succession. No answer. Of course. It’s early in the morning and you could be asleep. Were you able to sleep after a day like yesterday?

Natasha knocks again with no answer. She tries the doorknob, twisting it, finding that it’s unlocked. Every cynical part of her tells her you don’t want to be bothered with her. She opens the door, hoping you wouldn’t be angry if it’s the opposite, and she steps inside. The bed is unmade, a sign that you had been there, but otherwise looked untouched. The bathroom is empty if the lights being off is any indication. 

Natasha tries the girls’ room next. They’re sleeping just as peacefully. They would be up soon. All of her courage seems to dwindle as she begins to wonder where you are. Has she missed her chance? 

*********************************************

Down the hall, on the other side of the living quarters, you lay on Wanda’s bed, wrapped up in her arms with tear-stained cheeks. The warmth of your shared connection, the comfort in the familiarity of sibling love, offer a brief respite from the storm raging in your heart. Your body trembled, the attempts to contain your magic taking a toll on your weary soul. You had always prided yourself on your strength. Your ability to weather any storm had been admirable. Not that you had some inflated sense of ego. It was Natasha who taught you to wear it with confidence. So, you always held your head up high. You listened to your body. You marched forward. 

But now, facing the possible end of your relationship with Natasha, that strength wavered, threatened by a weakness that you had long tried to keep hidden. 

Wanda’s touch was a soothing balm, her presence served as a beacon of understanding and support. With each rhythmic rise and fall of her breath, you found a resemblance of calm, a reminder that you are not alone in your pain. You cling to your little sister, your fingers tangling in the fabric of Wanda’s shirt, seeking comfort in your shared bond. 

As the sun continued its ascent, casting a golden hue over the room, you closed your eyes. Your mind churned with thoughts and doubts. You love Natasha with a depth that could only be matched by the intensity of your magic. The growing distance between you only intensified your feelings. 

Your heart physically ached at the thought of losing Natasha, of watching your love slip through your fingers like sand. You longed for the laughter and intimacy, the moments when your connection felt unbreakable. Wanda, even in her sleep, could feel your unease, tugging you closer to her before she presses a kiss to your forehead. You remember the days when you were the one protecting her. Keeping her safe. Making her feel better. 

You shudder at the memory of your shared living space. The cell in which you and your siblings slept was a cold and desolate place, devoid of any warmth or comfort. Its bare concrete walls rose high, trapping the echoes of your whispered hopes and dreams within its confines. The only source of light came from a dim, flickering bulb suspended from the ceiling, casting eerie shadows that danced along the frigid floor. After many years of dedication to HYDRA, your loyalty meant nothing. The air was heavy with a stale, musty scent, a reminder of the isolation that enveloped you. The small, narrow window, its glass covered in layers of grime, offered a glimpse of the outside world, teasing you with a mere sliver of the freedom you longed for. The sound of distant footsteps and muffled voices drifted in a constant reminder of the guarded existence you were forced to endure.

You would pull Wanda and Pietro closer to you, covering them with your single blanket, watching the door for signs of life. You had grown protective over them from your time spent with them. Though they seemed content only being together. They took to you like moths in a flame. Wanda is the one to model her behavior after you. Some days, she wouldn’t talk, only looking to Pietro to be her voice. He would do it willingly. He was defiant. He was resilient. Funny even. He would crack jokes and make fun of Strucker. His favorite pastime. There in the confines of your hell, you would listen to Pietro go on and on about his adventures with training as Wanda cuddled into you. She would tangle her fingers in your shirt, her hands brushing against the skin of your belly, as she cracked a smile at her brother. Even with chapped lips and paled skin from lack of sunlight, Pietro never lost his smile. With you by his side, he wouldn’t. 

You’re brought back to reality when Wanda begins to shift. She takes deep breaths and your eyes flicker to her face. 

“Did you sleep?” She rasps, the lilt of her accent apparent, as she covers her mouth to yawn. 

“Some,” You nod. You return your gaze to the ceiling. 

“You’re not calm,” Wanda taps her hands. The magic seeping from them only further proves her point. You sigh, allowing the purple tendrils to recede into your skin before you turn to your side to look at her. 

“I’m fine,” You assure her. “I just need time. It’s not easy.”

“I know,” Wanda says. Her voice held no judgment whatsoever. You believe her. 

“Tell me something,” You encourage. “Maybe something about you and Monica perhaps?” You smirk and Wanda groans. 

“Nice way to change the subject,” Wanda shakes her head. “We’re not dating. I don’t think. It…it’s new. We’ve been together a few times but we lead different lives.”

“And you like her?” You can see it in her eyes. 

“I do,” Wanda confirms. With a smile that only radiated happiness, she begins to tell you all about Monica. “She’s gentle. She listens to everything I say. She doesn’t make fun of me for not knowing some things in English. Which is huge for me.” You’re appreciative of that. “She makes me feel seen in ways I’ve never felt before.” She praised her infectious laughter, which had the power to chase away the shadows of her past, and Monica’s unwavering support that emboldened her to chase her dreams. But above all, Wanda cherished the way she made her feel safe and cherished, igniting a flame of love that burned brighter with each passing day. At that moment, as the world swirled around you, you couldn't help but share in Wanda's joy, knowing that your sister had found someone who cherished her as fiercely as she deserved. 

“I’m sorry,” Wanda frowns. “I didn't mean to be selfish when you’re going through-”

“Never apologize for your happiness,” You interrupt her. “I like the look of love on you. It’s nice. It suits you.”

“Thank you,” Wanda curls into you again. There’s a shared silence between you. Neither of you is ready to get out of bed and face the day just yet. “Are you going to be okay?”

“I’ll be fine,” You say. Wanda doesn’t seem so convinced. You tap at her shoulders, forcing her to look into your eyes before you promise her again. “I’ll be fine.”

Wanda nods silently. She wouldn’t push. “The girls will be awake soon.”

“I’m excited to see their faces,” You tell her. “I want them to be happy. Even with everything going on. I think Olivia’s starting to notice something is wrong. She’s so young but so perceptive.”

“Blunt too,” Wanda jokes and you share a laugh. “Did you buy a lot?”

“Tons,” You gesture with your hands. “I’m thinking I may have gone a bit overboard considering how small they are.”

“You’re making up for lost time?” Wanda tries to use the right phrase. 

“For my childhood,” You take her hand in yours again. “I mean, I remember with my birth dad, for Christmas we would do things. It wasn’t traditional like decorating a tree or getting gifts. He would let me watch Christmas movies in the lab while he worked with Strucker.” Wanda knows this story already but she lets you tell it as if it’s the first time. 

Wanda’s phone receives a ping, breaking you from your cocoon, and she turns to inspect it. 

“Sam is inviting us down to breakfast. Says everyone wants to come up to open presents with the girls,” She waves her phone. 

“They can,” You begin to sit up. “I have to go and get them awake. I’ll meet you guys in my den in twenty.”

“Okay, see you there.” 

You rush out of Wanda’s suite and back down to your own. The lights are still off, it’s quiet, and there’s no sign of life. It’s still quite early in the morning. Too early even. Though no one in this entire compound has a habit of sleeping in. It could be attributed to the odd hours of Avenging and training and an assortment of other things. You glance over to Natasha’s bedroom door, noticing it closed, fighting the urge to go and knock. You instead walk to the girls’ bedroom. You find Lily awake in her crib, sitting up with a tired expression on her face, as she looks at you. She stands to her feet, waving her arms with grabbing motions, as she reaches out to you. 

“Good morning, Lovebug,” You kiss her forehead as you take her into your arms. “Merry Christmas.” You whisper to her. You walk over to the changing table, wasting no time in getting her clean, as she signs to you. Milk. She wants milk. Which of course means she wants some time with Natasha. It would probably be a while before that happens. You zip her onesie closed and carry her on your hip now. You kneel to gently shake Olivia awake. Olivia gives a big stretch, touching the headboard of her bed before her arms return to her side. 

“Mommy, it’s Christmas?” Olivia blinks sleepily. 

“Mhmm,” You grin. “Are you awake? Your presents are all lonely in the den waiting for you.”

“Presents?” Olivia’s still quite tired if her responses are any indication. 

“Do you want to go see it?” You offer. She takes your hand and you walk with her towards the living room. 

“I have to potty,” Olivia announces before she races ahead of you for the bathroom. You follow her detour, monitoring her as she relieves herself before you help her wash her hands. It’s then Natasha appears in the doorway, with a solemn expression on her face. 

“Hey,” She nods to you tersely. She doesn’t look like she’s had a wink of sleep. Though her hair is brushed and she has on a new outfit. She’s showered. Though that doesn’t cover the slight dark circles under her eyes. 

“Good.” You can’t help but think. Maybe you wanted her to feel just as bad as you. You’re not a terrible person for thinking so. In your arms, Lily wiggles out of your grasp to toddle over to Natasha. You can see the moment Natasha winces as she raises the twenty two pound girl in her arms. She’s in pain too. That part you feel a bit guilty about. 

“Mommy, I’m done,” Olivia finishes her business and walks to the sink where you lift her to wash her hands. 

“We have to get Lily’s cochlear,” You begin but Natasha raises a hand. She reaches into her pocket and pulls both devices out. Lily pats her ears in recognition while she settles long enough for Natasha to put them on. 

“Mama, we got presents!’ Olivia informs her other mother. She’s more awake than she was a few minutes ago. 

“You do?” Natasha fakes her enthusiasm for Olivia’s benefit. “Let’s go see.” They race towards the living room and you take your time following after them. 

“Wow! Mommy, Mama, look,” Olivia points to all of the presents. It’s even cuter when you consider she can’t pronounce her L’s. Olivia stalks over to the stacked presents, running her fingers across the papers, as she grabs one. Lily is set on the floor for her to do the same. Nothing could prepare you for the joy of seeing your kids excited about Christmas. Their wide smiles and twinkling eyes made your heart soar. 

“I, um, the guys and everyone wanted to see the girls open their presents,” You inform Natasha when someone knocks at the door. You go to open it, smiling widely when you notice a few of them have wrapped gifts in their hands. 

“That’s what I’m talking about,” Sam cheers as he walks into the suite. “Merry Christmas!” He cheers as he’s followed by Steve, Wanda, and Yelena. Somehow you know Melina and Alexei stayed back not to overwhelm Natasha. The room was adorned with festive decorations, casting a warm glow that reflected the love and unity shared by the team as they piled in. Tony and Pepper were probably still asleep or helping Morgan tear through the mountains of her presents. They opted to have family mornings alone for Christmas. You could respect it. 

The Christmas morning was filled with an air of anticipation and subtle tension as you gathered around the twinkling tree in the cozy living room. As the children's excited giggles filled the room, you and Natasha exchanged hesitant glances, your unspoken emotions echoing between you. It has been a challenging time for your relationship, with uncertainty holding you back, and the strain lingering beneath the surface. But amidst the awkwardness, you remained determined to provide your daughters with a joyful Christmas. 

With a nod of agreement, you and Natasha took your places beside Olivia and Lily. Your smile masks the complexities of your heart. The room fell into a hushed silence as the children eagerly tore into the brightly wrapped presents, their eyes wide with wonder and delight. 

Olivia squealed in joy as she unwrapped a stuffed animal, hugging it tightly against her chest. Lily clapped her tiny hands in glee, discovering a set of colorful blocks. The room filled with laughter and the delightful chaos of torn gift wrappings. Meanwhile, the Avengers watched on, their presence offering a comforting backdrop to the strained atmosphere. They exchanged knowing glances, their eyes conveying support for you and Natasha, understanding the intricacies of your relationship and the delicate dance they now navigated.

“Oh, open that one,” Yelena was so engrossed in her niece’s gift opening she didn’t have time to question you or Natasha. She was enjoying this way too much. Olivia, under the guidance of her aunt, opens a giant box. 

“A baby!” Olivia cheers. Lily, always in her sister’s business, walks over to Olivia to try and snatch the doll. 

“Uh oh,” Steve voices as there’s a hint of a fight in the midst. 

“This one is yours,” You sign to Lily as you show her an identical box. Lily waits with her hands on her tummy, bending over in excitement, as she bounces with her knees. You open the box, turning the front to her to watch as her mouth forms a perfect oh.

“Baby!” Lily grabs the box and clutches it to her. “Open.” She demands. There’s a slight roar of laughter and she startles. She doesn’t understand how that was funny. You open the box for her and pass her doll to her. She walks over to sit in Natasha’s lap to show off her new doll. “Mama, baby.” She practically shoves the toy into Natasha’s face. 

“I see,” Natasha signs. “She’s your baby.”

“Mine,” Lily nods. She tucks the baby’s head in the crook of her elbow, the body and legs dangling from her arm, and moves on to the next present. So much for taking care of her toy. 

“There is so much presents,” Olivia smiles. 

“I know right,” Yelena agrees. “Your parents are loaded.”

“What’s that mean?” Olivia tilts her head. 

“It means you still have more presents to open,” Natasha doesn’t think now is the time to explain the concept of money and wealth to a three-year-old. 

“So, Natasha, what did you get R for Christmas?” Sam questions, either oblivious or not caring about the tension between the two of you. 

You look over to Natasha, not offering any reprieve, as she stumbles for only a second. 

“Nothing that is of your concern,” Natasha answers. Truthfully she hadn’t been expecting him to ask. 

“Oh, is that code word for an inappropriate toy,” Sam questions and he receives a wack from Steve. 

“Ouch,” Sam rubs the sore spot on his arm. 

“Oh, no hitting, that’s bad Uncle Steve,” Olivia scolds the man. 

“You’re right it is bad, Olivia,” Steve agrees. “I’m sorry Sam that I bruised your puny arm.”

“My arms are not puny,” Sam begins to flex his muscles. Steve rolls his eyes. Out of your peripheral, you can see Natasha smile at their exchange. She’s missed the guys. Maybe staying in the compound will be a good thing for her. 

As the gift opening continued, you and Natasha find yourselves sharing brief smiles and stolen glances. You remained civil, respecting the sanctity of the day and the shared memories you’re building with the girls. Amid the festive chaos, Olivia and Lily, oblivious to the complexness of the adult world, radiated innocence and love. Their laughter and excitement were contagious, their innocent joy a reminder of the preciousness of family bonds. 

****************************************

When all is done, everyone begins to crave breakfast. The girls jump at the chance to go down to the kitchen to sit with Steve and Sam. They chase after the guys with shrieks and shouts. Yelena and Wanda linger as you offer to stay behind and clean. 

“I can help,” Wanda offers but you shake your head. 

“Go, eat,” You shoo her. “I’ll be fine.”

“Okay,” Wanda nods. She looks to see if Yelena is coming too. The blonde nods but looks between the two of you. It’s then you notice Natasha has been staring at you. 

“I’m going to stay behind and help,” Natasha decides for the both of you. Wanda’s eyes flash to you. Would you approve of that?

“Yeah, you two go ahead,” You lick your lips nervously. The women both shuffle out slowly, probably in hopes to hear your conversation, but nothing is said. You get straight to work cleaning. The room was scattered with discarded wrapping paper, a colorful aftermath of the Christmas morning festivities. Natasha stood there, her hands absentmindedly clutching a crumpled piece of paper, her thoughts swirling with uncertainty. She felt a knot in her stomach, unsure of how to approach you and mend the fractures that had formed between you.

You, on the other hand, moved about with a touch of distance, your body language guarded. The remnants of your argument still lingered in the air, casting a shadow over the otherwise joyous occasion. Natasha could feel the walls you had put up, a barrier that seemed impenetrable, and it weighed heavily on her heart. The silence hung between you, heavy with unspoken words and unresolved emotions. Natasha's mind raced, searching for the right words, but finding none that seemed adequate to heal the wounds that had formed. In her life as a spy, she had been trained to navigate treacherous situations, to infiltrate and extract information, but matters of the heart were foreign territory.

As she moved about the room, picking up wrapping paper and carefully folding it, Natasha racked her brain for something, anything, to bridge the gap between you. And then, as if by a stroke of inspiration, a question formed on her lips. "What's your favorite childhood memory?" she asked, her voice soft but filled with genuine curiosity.

Your eyes flickered with surprise at the unexpected question, momentarily caught off guard. But slowly, a hint of a smile tugged at the corners of your lips, your guard softening just a touch. You would humor her for now. 

“I wasn’t a child, but I certainly acted like one at times,” You begin, your voice tinged with a hint of nostalgia. “Back at the lab, we… me, Pietro, and Wanda would sneak out of our room, courtesy of magic.” You continue. “When the guards were at their lowest, drinking or watching sports or whatever it is they were doing, we would rush through the hallways. We would sneak up to the roof. We could see the city lights, what was left of them at least, from the top. We would laugh, dance, and tell stories. I wanted them to experience some form of happiness. The twins were fifteen when I met them. Scared and lonely. I did everything I could to make sure they felt like they had someone.” You look to Natasha before turning away. “In those moments, on the roof, we were just siblings. They always believed they joined HYDRA to serve the greater good. They were naive. I knew better. Still, I didn’t take away their hope.” 

“I’m sorry you had to go through that,” 

“I’m not,” You shrug. “Who knows where I would be.” 

Natasha nods silently. 

“I was determined to be something other than what they raised me for,” You informed her. The last of the wrapping paper in your hands as you drop everything into the trash can. “My father didn’t die in vain.”

Natasha takes this moment to reflect on her feelings and what she wants this moment to be. As the last remnants of wrapping paper were tidied away, Natasha mustered up the courage to address the elephant in the room. She took a tentative step towards you, her voice soft yet laced with trepidation. You want to think her intentions are good. You want to listen to whatever she has to say. Instead, you take a step back. 

“Y/n,” Natasha begins. Her eyes searched your face for any signs of receptiveness. Your expression remained guarded, a flicker of defiance in your eyes. 

Natasha’s heart sank, her instincts telling her that now might not be the right time to push further. She had noticed the control of your magic seemed more strained than usual, the subtle flickers of energy escaping your grasp as she’d stepped closer to you. It was a sign your emotions were beginning to run high, and she didn’t want to add fuel to the fire. Silently, Natasha withdrew her approach, giving you the space you seemed to need. She watches as your gaze shifts, your eyes cast downward, avoiding any direct contact. 

“I want the girls every weekend,” Natasha begins. “I take it you’re going to keep them.”

You lift your head. You weren’t expecting that. “T-that’s fine. I can drive them up or you can pick them up. I’m sure, um, Tony has a car you can borrow.”

“Thank you,” Natasha nods. 

The room grew uncomfortably silent, tension hanging heavy in the air. Natasha swallowed the words that lingered on the tip of her tongue, understanding that pushing you further might only deepen the divide between you. Instead, Natasha chose to respect the silence, allowing it to envelop you in its uneasy embrace. She knew that sometimes words weren't enough, that silence could hold its power—a moment to reflect, to gather thoughts, and to find solace in one's presence. And so, in that stillness, you stood, two souls struggling to find common ground amidst the turmoil of their emotions. Each passing second felt heavy with unspoken thoughts and unaddressed fears, yet neither of you dared to break the silence.

With a gentle sigh, Natasha turned away, her footsteps barely audible as she retreated to her bedroom. She didn't know what the future held for you, but she was determined to give you the space you needed. 

You stood alone in the living room, emotions swirling within you. Natasha seemed like she was opening up to you and you had pushed her away. The silence in her absence enveloped you, amplifying the turmoil that had been building up inside. 

In that solitary moment, your control over your magic wavered. A surge of raw energy crackled through your veins, sparks of vibrant colors dancing around your fingertips. For a second, you wanted to allow it to consume you. Oh, how good it would feel to let it all out. Your powers run off emotion. They only work as best as you allow them. You’re not some animal waiting to be uncaged. It’s just, you’re tired, and you're hurt, and you’re confused. As quickly as it had appeared, your magic subsided. You closed your eyes, taking a deep breath, desperately trying to regain your composure. The room returned to its calm state, the remnants of your unleashed magic fading into the air. 

WHO LIVES, WHO DIES, WHO TELLS YOUR STORY CHAPTER THIRTEEN

Who Lives, Who Dies Who Tells Your Story

Natasha Romanoff x Fem!Reader

Summary: Natasha and Reader get into an accident that leaves Natasha in critical condition. When she wakes up, it’s revealed that she has amnesia and doesn’t remember her life, wife, or children.

Masterlist | General Masterlist

Follow my update page @natsxaddiction2

w/c:5.5k

Natasha stood in the expansive training room of the Avengers' compound, her lean frame tense with anticipation. The room echoed with the sounds of her footsteps as she paced back and forth, her mind a whirlwind of confusion and frustration. Her heart pounded in her chest, a constant reminder of the void she felt within her, the absence of memories that should have been there.

Amnesia had stolen her past, leaving her adrift in a sea of uncertainty. The accident had taken so much from her—the memories of her wife, her two beloved children. Even with her love growing and her fierce protectiveness of the girls they were mere names to her now, their faces like faded photographs in an old album.

She knew you had tried to fill in the gaps, tried to help her remember the life you had built together. But your interactions had been strained, filled with tension and hostility. Natasha couldn't help but feel guilty for breaking your family, for being the cause of the fractures that ran deep within the once-solid foundation.

So she stands here, wishing she could force herself to remember, and still coming up short. She wipes a sheen of sweat from her forehead before dropping her hands. It’s so early here. Just barely reaching six a.m. and she’s been here for hours. She had pushed her body to its limits, even while still nursing the wounds and injuries sustained in that fateful car crash.

With a deep breath, Natasha stepped toward the training equipment, the scent of sweat and metal filling her nostrils. She felt the coolness of the room envelop her, the familiar sensation of anticipation settling over her like a second skin. Her body ached, a constant reminder of her physical limitations, but she ignored the pain, pushing herself harder, faster, and stronger.

As she began her routine, the world around her faded away, her focus narrowing to the rhythmic cadence of her movements. The weight of her past, the guilt that threatened to consume her, momentarily lifted as her muscles flexed and her body contorted with precision. Each punch, kick, and somersault was a testament to her resilience, a testament to the fighter she had always been.

At that moment, alone in the training room, Natasha found solace in the physicality of her training. The motion became her refuge, the only constant in a world that felt unfamiliar and foreign. With every step, every leap, she fought to reclaim her identity, to find the fragments of her past that remained buried within her subconscious.

Natasha’s fists clenched tightly as she executed a series of precise punches, her muscles flexing with each strike. Lost in her world of determination, she barely noticed Clint Barton's arrival in the training room.

Clint approached cautiously, waiting for a break in Natasha's relentless assault before calling out to her. "Hey, Nat, mind taking a breather for a sec?"

Startled, Natasha turned toward him, her chest heaving with exertion. "It’s the day after Christmas. Shouldn’t you be home?” She doesn’t seem the slightest bit phased that he’s here. 

“A friend called in a favor,” Clint shrugged. He stepped closer, concern etched on his face. "Just wanted to check in on you.”

Without a second thought, Natasha continues her punching against the bag.  

“How are you feeling?"

Natasha took a moment to catch her breath, wiping the sweat from her brow. She glanced at Clint, her gaze flickering with a mix of determination and frustration. “I’m fine,”

Clint's brow furrowed as he said bluntly. “Bullshit.”

"Y/n asked me to come back to the compound," Natasha admitted, her voice tinged with uncertainty. "She thinks it might help me regain my memories, and piece together who I used to be. Also, give her some space. I think things have been intense."

Clint's eyes softened with understanding. "That's a lot to take in, Nat. But maybe it's worth a shot. You've been through so much, and having familiar surroundings might trigger something."

Natasha sighed, her shoulders sagging. "I know. It's just... I feel guilty, Clint. I've broken our family."

Clint placed a reassuring hand on her shoulder. "Nat, we all have our battles to fight. And while it's true that you're dealing with amnesia, you can't blame yourself for everything. I highly doubt it’s broken. You’re both better than that."

A flicker of gratitude flashed across Natasha's eyes as she absorbed Clint's words. "I hope so."

A mischievous smile tugged at the corners of Clint's lips. "We could all use a little downtime. How about we head to the bar after you've cooled down? It might be good for you to unwind."

“It’s six am,” Natasha shakes her head. “I’m also still nursing. I don’t know the mechanics of it. Lily needs it. I don’t want to taint it.”

“One cup won’t hurt,” Clint shrugs. Knowing Natasha won’t give in he tries for something else. “How bout a strong cup of coffee then?”

Natasha considered his suggestion for a moment, a small frown playing on her lips. "Just one."

Together, Clint and Natasha left the training room, walking side by side towards the kitchen, ready to engage in a little therapy session. Even if Natasha wasn’t in the mood to talk, she knew having Clint be a sounding board was better than nothing. 

*******************************

Clint led Natasha to a quiet corner of the kitchen, away from the prying eyes and eager ears of the compound. He starts up the Keurig before grabbing two mugs for both of them. He settled into a chair opposite her, a serious expression on his face. Neither of them speaks for a while. They simply enjoy the other’s company. Clint knows how stubborn Natasha is. She won’t break first. 

“So, clearly things haven’t been going well since I last talked with you,” Clint clears his throat. 

Natasha's gaze dropped, her fingers tracing the rim of her glass. She took a deep breath, trying to gather her thoughts. "It's been... difficult," she admitted, her voice laced with frustration. "Losing my memories, seeing this family that’s supposed to be mine, it's like a constant voice telling me not to trust it."

Clint nodded, his eyes filled with empathy. "I get it, Nat. It's a lot to process, to suddenly have this person claiming to be such a significant part of your life. But have you been kind to y/n? Have you tried to see things from her perspective?"

Natasha's shoulders slumped as she shook her head. "No, I haven't. I've been distant, cold even. I can't shake the feeling that it's all a trap, a manipulation to exploit my vulnerability. My instincts as a spy are telling me to be cautious, to question everything." She murmurs. 

Clint leaned forward, his voice gentle but firm. "Nat, I understand your reservations, but remember, y/n has been here by your side since the accident. She’s supported you, cared for you, and loved you despite your memory loss. She deserves your kindness and consideration."

Natasha sighed, a mix of guilt and uncertainty washing over her. "I’m well aware." 

Clint placed a reassuring hand on Natasha's, his gaze filled with understanding. "It's not easy, Nat. But maybe it's time to give her a chance. Try to see her as the person she claims to be, the person who loves you unconditionally. You might find that your heart remembers what your mind cannot."

Natasha nodded slowly, a flicker of hope glimmering in her eyes. "When did you get so wise?” She tries to ease the pressure. At his serious face, she closes her eyes. “She won’t talk to me."

“Give it time,” Clint replied. 

Natasha sits with a torn expression on her face. She studies the liquid inside of her cup as if it would turn into something else. Something stronger. She’s been so conflicted and she doesn’t think it’s her place to ask these questions. Who better to ask them than Clint?

“She grew up with Hydra,” She says finally. Clint nods, though his expression has morphed into confusion. 

“You two are alike in a lot of ways,” He pushes his mug away. 

“Did they hurt her there?” She asks. Then she sharks her head as if to say forget it. It’s not truly her business to know. 

“If you’re asking what I think you’re asking then I don’t know,” Clint shifts in his chair. “She would never tell us. Not even the therapist. She’s secretive.” Clint looks at her to gauge her reaction. “I can’t imagine her time there was fun or easy. When they came back with us. They were weird. She and Wanda. I hate to describe it like that. She would wander the halls at night sometimes. She had nightmares. She and Wanda were practically joined at the hip. The only difference was Wanda was more open to the idea of a family. Which is a stretch. Y/n would only talk to her or you.”

“I thought we hated each other then?” Natasha raises a brow. 

“Like I said before,” Clint fiddles with his fingers. “When you weren’t sleeping together that might have been true. It’s hard to be mad at someone you’re with in that way.”

“Laura loves her,” Natasha says suddenly. 

“She’s the only girl you’ve ever brought home to us,” Clint reminds her. Besides Maria Hill, you are the only person Natasha’s ever felt the need to introduce people to. You’re the only person she’s ever bragged about. The only person she’s ever loved. She doesn’t even remember it. 

“She’s good with the girls and she’s kind.” Natasha lists. 

“She is,” Clint agrees. “You don’t have to convince yourself to love her.”

“What if I want to? What if I need to and I don’t know how?” Natasha’s hand trembles, her frustration growing. She drops them to her lap. “Everyone keeps telling me that we had this great love. I want to see it for myself. I almost hurt her, Clint.”

“You hit her?” Clint doesn’t want to accuse her of such a thing. 

“Course not,” Natasha frowns. “Doesn’t mean the alternative is any better. That’s not what a marriage is supposed to be.”

“We all make mistakes,” Clint says gently. 

“A mistake is if I forgot she asked me to pick up the milk,” Natasha becomes frustrated with herself. “A mistake is if I add a pink shirt to the wrong laundry piles. It’s not putting a knife to my wife’s throat and expecting her to accept my apology.”

“A knife?” Clint rubs a hand over his face. “Jesus, Nat.” 

“Tell me which apology speech fixes that,” Natasha leans back in her chair. 

“And have you?” Clint tilts his head. There’s a look of confusion on her face. “Have you tried apologizing? Talking to her? Or are you doing the thing where you keep pushing her away because you’re afraid? Things won't heal if you don’t do the work.”

Natasha looks away from him. She squares her jaw and shakes her head. 

“I did yesterday,” Natasha takes the empty mugs to carry over to the sink. Anything to keep her from seeing the disappointment in his eyes. “She’s not really receptive to it. I don’t blame her.” She sets the mugs into the near-empty sink. She turns back to Clint, folding her arms before she looks up at the ceiling to blink back tears. “She’s struggling with her magic. I can um, see the stress maybe, it’s bothering her. She takes anxiety pills.”

“Did you learn that from snooping?”

“No, she told me,” Natasha bites her lip. “I think she’s been using some sort of glamor this entire time. Her face the first day I was in the hospital had a few cuts and scrapes. A gash on her head covered by a bandage.” Natasha gestures. “ I didn’t really pay attention to her after that.” 

Clint listened intently as Natasha shared her concerns about your struggles with your magic. His brow furrowed, showing his genuine concern for the both of you. "Nat, I can see how torn you are. It's tough to be in a situation where you want to help but feel like you're causing the stress."

Natasha nodded, appreciating Clint's understanding. "I know, Clint. I want to support her, to help in any way I can. But I feel so new to relationships, especially with my memory loss. I'm navigating uncharted territory, and sometimes, I don't even know where to begin."

Clint's gaze softened, and he leaned closer, his voice filled with reassurance. “Relationships are all about growth and learning together. It's okay to feel unsure or make mistakes. What matters is that you're willing to try, communicate openly with y/n, and support each other through it all. Remember, love is a journey, not a destination."

“That’s the corniest yet loveliest thing I ever heard you say,” Natasha shakes her head. “I’ll try.” Natasha nods. Clint cracks a smile. That’s all he needed to hear. As they delved deeper into their conversation, discussing the intricacies of relationships and the importance of communication, their dialogue was suddenly interrupted by the entrance of Wanda. The air seemed to grow tense as Wanda made her way through the kitchen, her expression guarded and her eyes fixed on her own thoughts.

Silence hung in the air, unspoken tension threading its way through the room. Natasha glanced at Wanda, recognizing the loyalty she felt toward you. Understanding the unspoken dynamic, she kept her gaze lowered, allowing Wanda the space to express herself.

Clint, ever the mediator, attempted to break the heavy atmosphere with a random conversation starter. "Hey, Wanda, going out for a run?"

Wanda's lips twitched with a barely noticeable response, but it was clear she was intentionally ignoring Natasha. She busied herself with preparing a smoothie for herself, seemingly engrossed in the task at hand.

“Yep,” Wanda continues dumping frozen ingredients into the blender. “Usually, I would go with y/n while she’s here. She has the girls on her own today.” There’s a hidden undertone to her words. It doesn’t take long for Natasha to decipher them. 

Clint smiled, trying to lighten the atmosphere. "That sounds refreshing. Mind sharing the recipe for the smoothie with me? I could use some variety in my own morning routine."

Wanda hesitated for a moment, seemingly torn between engaging in conversation and maintaining her distance from Natasha. Eventually, she sighed softly and shrugged. "Sure, Clint. I'll give you the details later."

Natasha watched the interaction, her gaze shifting between Clint and Wanda. It was clear that Wanda was purposefully ignoring her. The realization stung, but Natasha understood the complexity of the situation. She was still a stranger to herself and to those who had once been her closest allies.

Silence settled over the room as Wanda finished blending her smoothie and grabbed a glass from the cabinet. She moved with calculated efficiency, her focus solely on her task. It became clear that Wanda was not perceptive of Natasha's presence or the emotions swirling within her.

Clint cast a sympathetic glance toward Natasha, silently acknowledging the tension in the room. 

As Wanda took a sip of her smoothie, she turned away, seemingly oblivious to the weight of the situation. The moment lingered, the unspoken words hanging in the air, a stark reminder of the fractures that still existed within their once unbreakable bond.

For now, Natasha would have to accept the distance and work towards rebuilding the connections that had been severed by her amnesia. She understood that healing would take time, patience, and understanding, not just from others but also from herself.

***************************

You settle onto the couch, carefully cradling Lily in your lap. The little one looks up at you with wide, innocent eyes, her chubby fingers reaching out for the hot dog you hold in your hand. She's learning to feed herself, and you can't help but smile at her determination.

Gently, you guide her tiny hand toward the hot dog, watching as she grasps it with a mix of excitement and concentration. Her face lights up with delight as she takes a tentative bite, a sprinkle of ketchup smearing across her cheek. You can't help but chuckle at the messy sight.

Meanwhile, Olivia is a whirlwind of energy, bouncing off the walls nearby. Her favorite show, Gracie's Corner, is playing on the TV, but her attention is split between the animated characters and the fascinating world she creates in her own imagination. Her laughter fills the air, a symphony of joy that echoes through the room.

As Lily continues to explore her newfound independence, you marvel at the way she's growing, the way she's starting to carve out her own path in the world. She may be small, but her determination is mighty. You lean in closer, gently wiping away the ketchup from her cheek with your thumb, earning a toothy grin in response.

Olivia suddenly pauses in her bouncing, her gaze shifting from the TV to her little sister. Curiosity shines in her eyes as she watches Lily clumsily handle her food. With an impish grin, Olivia abandons Gracie's Corner and bounds over to join you on the couch.

"Look, Lily!" Olivia exclaims, her voice filled with excitement. "I can eat hot dogs all by myself too!" She holds up her own hot dog, taking a big bite and mimicking Lily's messy eating style. You can't help but laugh at the adorable sight, your heart swelling with love for your two precious children.

You lean down and press a kiss to the top of Lily's head, then reach out to tousle Olivia's hair. "You're both amazing," you whisper, your voice filled with pride. As Lily sat in your lap, happily devouring her hot dog, Olivia's wide eyes scanned the room, searching for someone she dearly missed. Her tiny voice filled with innocence and curiosity, she tugged at your sleeve, her face filled with anticipation. "Mommy? Where's Mama?"

Your heart sank at Olivia's innocent question, the weight of the situation weighing heavily on your shoulders. You knew that Natasha's absence during the wake-up time hadn't gone unnoticed by the perceptive three-year-old. You took a deep breath, mustering a smile to mask your worries. "Mama's busy, sweetheart. She'll be here soon."

Olivia's brows furrowed, her young mind struggling to comprehend the tension in the room and the noticeable absence of her other parent. "Why Mama always busy? Why she not here like before?"

Your heart ached as you wrapped your arm around Olivia, pulling her close. "Oh, sweetie, Mama has some things she's working through right now. It's complicated, but she loves you very much. Sometimes people need a little time to figure things out."

Olivia's face scrunched up in confusion, her innocent eyes searching your face for answers. "But Mama always with us. Why not now?"

You swallowed the lump in your throat, wishing you had the perfect words to explain the situation to your young daughter. You gently brushed a hand through Olivia's hair, trying to offer some semblance of comfort. "It's hard to explain, love. Mama is going through something called amnesia, it means she can't remember things very well right now. But we're here for her, and we'll figure it out together."

Olivia's brows furrowed even deeper, her young mind grappling with the concept of amnesia. "Amnem-what?"

You chuckled softly, grateful for Olivia's innocence at that moment. "It's just a big word that means Mama's memory is a bit mixed up right now. I told you before. But don't worry, we're going to help her get better."

Olivia's eyes lit up with a glimmer of understanding, her young heart full of love and compassion. "I love Mama. I can help too!"

Your heart swelled with pride and gratitude for your caring and resilient daughter. You leaned in, planting a gentle kiss on Olivia's forehead. "You're such a good helper, my sweet Olivia. Mama will appreciate that more than you know." With Oliva asking questions now was a good time to talk about the big elephant in the room. At least for you. 

You took a deep breath, preparing yourself for the difficult conversation ahead. You pulled Olivia closer, gently stroking her hair as you spoke. "Olivia, sweetheart, Mama is going to be staying here at the compound for a little while, while we go back home to the city."

Olivia's eyes widened with a mix of confusion and disappointment. She clung to you, a hint of resistance in her voice. "But I want Mama to come home with us! Why does she have to stay here?"

Your heart sank at Olivia's response, the weight of your own frustration and sadness mingling with your attempts to explain. You tightened your embrace, trying to find the right words. "I know, love. It's hard to understand, but Mama needs some time and space to figure things out. She needs to be here for a little while, but we'll visit her often, I promise."

Olivia's lower lip trembled, tears welling up in her eyes. "But I want Mama to go home with me and my sister."

You fought back your own tears, desperately wishing Natasha would step up and handle these conversations herself. It pained you to be the one delivering the news, feeling the weight of both Olivia's disappointment and your own longing for things to be different. You rubbed Olivia’s back, your voice filled with a mix of frustration and sadness. "I know, my love. I wish Mama could do all those things too. But right now, this is what's best for her, and we have to support her."

Olivia's tears spilled over, her voice filled with a mix of defiance and sadness. "I don't like it,” She shook her head. “I don't like it at all."

Your heart shattered as you kissed Olivia's forehead, your own voice choked with emotion. "I know, Olivia. I don't like it either. Things will get better, I promise.” You know it could possibly be a false promise but you have hope. 

As you wiped away your own tears, the sound of footsteps echoed in the room, drawing your attention. Natasha entered, her presence immediately capturing Olivia's attention. Without hesitation, Olivia rushed towards her, tears streaming down her face. She threw her small arms around Natasha’s legs, seeking solace and comfort.

Confusion etched Natasha's face as she held Olivia tightly, her voice filled with concern. "Olivia, why are you crying? What's wrong?"

You watched the scene unfold, your heart breaking at the sight of your daughter's distress. You quickly composed yourself, hiding your tears behind a forced smile. "She's upset because I explained that you'll be staying at the compound for a little while, Natasha."

Natasha's brow furrowed in a mix of realization and remorse. She gently brushed Olivia's hair, her voice tender and filled with reassurance. "Oh, sweetheart, I'm so sorry for making you sad. But guess what? I promise that I'll come and get you every weekend. We'll have a special time together, just you, me, and Lily."

“And Mommy?” 

“And your Mommy if she wants to,” Natasha glances at you but you avoid her gaze. You want to believe those words. 

Olivia's tear-streaked face lit up with a glimmer of hope, her sobs beginning to subside. "Really, Mama? You promise?"

Natasha nodded, her eyes sparkling with sincerity. "I promise, my love. Every weekend, I'll be there to spend time with you, to read your stories, sing you lullabies, and tuck you in at night. You won't be alone, I promise."

Olivia's grip on Natasha tightened, her trust and love for her Mama shining through. She looked up at you, seeking confirmation, and you nodded, your voice filled with gratitude and relief. "That's right, Olivia. Mama is going to make sure she's there for you, no matter what. You'll always be loved and cared for."

As Natasha held Olivia, the weight of her absence and the impact it had on the family settled upon her. She made a silent vow to herself, to do whatever it took to be there for her children, to bridge the gap that her memory loss had created, and to rebuild the bond that was so precious to her.

You watched, your heart swelling with a mixture of emotions as Natasha comforted Olivia. You could only hope things turned out well for all of you. 

As Natasha held Olivia in her arms, the weight of their emotions began to subside, replaced by a glimmer of hope. It was at that moment that Lily slid from your lap and toddled over, a small piece of hotdog clutched in her tiny hand. With a gentle smile, Lily offered the morsel to Natasha, her eyes filled with innocence and acceptance.

Natasha's gaze shifted to Lily, her heart swelling with warmth. She accepted the shared hotdog, taking a bite and savoring the simple act of connection. Lily looked at Natasha and signed a few simple words, a gesture of love and inclusion that bridged the communication gap. The most prominent word is milk. 

“You only want one thing from me,” Natasha chuckles. “In a minute baby.” Natasha brushes a hand over her head. 

You watched the scene unfold, your heart brimming with a mixture of emotions. You observed Lily's small but significant efforts to engage with Natasha, silently appreciating your daughter's ability to bring comfort and ease the tension in the room. You didn't feel up to talking at that moment, but you found solace in witnessing the unspoken bond between Natasha and Lily.

Natasha met Lily's gaze, her eyes shimmering with gratitude and affection. She reached out, gently brushing her fingers against Lily's cheek, a silent acknowledgment of their connection. Lily beamed, her eyes sparkling with joy. 

Natasha could sense the lingering tension between herself and you, the weight of unspoken words and unaddressed emotions hanging in the air. She took a deep breath, gathering her courage to break through the barriers that had formed between you.

With Olivia in her arms and Lily happily occupied with her hotdog, Natasha stood to sit across from you, her voice gentle yet tinged with remorse. "Y/n I…” Natasha swallows thickly. “I want to try and make things right between us. I know I've caused a lot of pain, and I'm sorry. Can we... can we start fresh, for the girls' sake?"

Your posture remained stiff, your eyes guarded with a hint of regret. You hesitated for a moment before responding, your voice laced with a mix of vulnerability and caution. "Natasha, it's not that easy.” You could see her face fall. You would hate to completely shut her down. “We can’t talk about this in front of the girls.” You sigh. “We've been through so much, and your memory loss... it's complicated. I need time to process everything."

“I know,” Natasha nods. Natasha’s attempt at waving a white flag hadn’t gone unnoticed. You know her words are genuine. You could see a sliver of the woman you know peeking out but you’re still hurt. You’re still unsure about so many things. You may need a break more than her at this point in time. 

She could understand that. 

**********************

As the bitter wind swept through the air, you hurriedly strapped Lily into her car seat, the tiredness evident in the little girl's half-asleep demeanor. Olivia, full of excitement, bounced in her seat, ready for the journey back home. Meanwhile, Yelena packed her belongings into the trunk, unaware of the impending disappointment that awaited Olivia.

Olivia's anticipation quickly turned into confusion, then frustration, as she realized Natasha wasn't joining everyone. Her excitement gave way to an inconsolable tantrum, her little voice filled with tears and anger. "Mama! Mama, why isn't Mama coming with us? I want Mama!" she wailed, her distress echoing through the cold air.

Yelena's attention snapped to Olivia's outburst, her eyes widening with realization. She rushed over to the car, her voice filled with concern and anger. "What's going on?”

Your heart heavy with the weight of the situation, fought back tears as you tried to find the right words. "Olivia, sweetheart, Mama needs to stay at the compound for a little while longer. But she loves you both so much, and she'll always be here for you."

“When did this happen?” Yelena looks at Natasha with her nostrils flared. “What did you do?” She accused. 

Olivia's cries intensified, her frustration at the situation pouring out through her tears. Yelena's anger flared, her voice sharp and filled with protectiveness. "This isn't fair, y/n. Natasha should be here with us. She should be fighting for her family."

With determination,  Natasha approached the car, her breath visible in the frigid air, and knelt down beside Olivia's window. Despite her own emotional turmoil, she summoned a soft, reassuring smile.

"Olivia, my love, I'm here. I may not be able to go with you right now, but I promise, I will always be your Mama," Natasha's voice quivered with a mix of love and regret. "I'll visit you, we'll talk, and we'll make new memories together. You're my heart, and nothing will change that."

“Fuck that, you don’t think she knows that’s bullshit,” Yelena shoves Natasha slightly. 

“Hey, Yelena,” You warn. “Not right now.” You shake your head. You turn towards the backseat to console Olivia. You hate that this is what things have come to. 

As the bitter wind cut through the air, Yelena's anger flared as she forcefully pulled Natasha aside. Her hazel eyes, filled with a mix of frustration and concern, bore into Natasha's soul. Yelena's voice trembled with emotion as she began to speak, her words laced with the weight of their shared history.

"Natasha, do you even realize what you're throwing away? Our family... the love and bonds we've built together?" Yelena's voice quivered, her voice laced with a mixture of disappointment and desperation. "You have two incredible children who love you unconditionally, and y/n, who has stood by your side through everything. How can you let it all slip away?"

Natasha's heart ached as she listened to Yelena's heartfelt plea. She knew the truth in Yelena's words, and the pain of her own actions weighed heavily upon her. Her voice, tinged with regret and determination, echoed in the frigid air. "Yelena, I never wanted any of this. Losing my memories... it shattered my sense of self, my trust in everything, including the love I have for our family."

Yelena's anger softened, her eyes filled with a mix of understanding and empathy. She reached out, her hand finding its way to Natasha's shoulder, offering a touch of sisterly comfort. "Natasha, I get it. I can't even begin to understand the confusion and pain you must be going through. But you can't let it destroy what you built."

Tears welled up in Natasha's eyes as she nodded, her voice choked with emotion. "I don't want to lose them, Yelena. I want to fix this, to find a way back to them. I want to be the wife y/n deserves, the mother our girls need."

Yelena's grip tightened, her voice firm but filled with compassion. "Then fix it, Natasha. Fight for them, for us. You have the strength within you to overcome this. Remember who you were and the love that brought you here. Rebuild those memories, rebuild our family."

Natasha took a shuddering breath, her resolve growing stronger with each passing moment. 

“I don’t even know you that well.”

“Doesn’t matter,” Yelena shrugs. “Memories come and go. I’m your little sister. I’m not going to sit by and let you mess this up.”

Natasha nods. She looks back towards the car. With a heavy heart, she approached the car where you sat, your gaze fixed on the road ahead. The air between you was thick with unspoken words, the longing for something more palpable. Natasha swallowed the lump in her throat, reminding herself of the purpose of her visit.

She leaned in through the open window, her voice gentle but laced with regret. " I've packed some frozen breastmilk for Lily. It should last a few days. I'll be in contact, and I promise, I'll find a way to be there for them, even if I can't physically be here."

Your eyes flickered with a mix of gratitude and sadness, your voice a whisper in the stillness. "Thank you, Natasha. I appreciate it."

Silence settled between you, an unspoken ache lingering in the air. 

She took a step back, her voice filled with a quiet determination. "Thank you for listening earlier."

You met her gaze.  You nodded, their voice barely above a whisper. "It’s the least I could do. I believe you. Take care of yourself, Natasha.”

“You too,” Natasha nodded. 

As she pulled away from the car, her heart heavy with a mix of longing and determination, she felt a pang of sorrow. She watched as you started the car, giving her one last look, a silent goodbye. Yelena rolled her eyes before taking her spot in the front seat. She couldn’t believe any of this. 

The engine roared to life, and the car began to roll away, leaving Natasha standing alone in the cold. She hugged herself tightly, trying to ward off the chill that seeped through her bones. As the car faded into the distance, she took a deep breath, a silent vow echoing in her mind.

With her resolve broken, Natasha turned and made her way back toward the compound. 

WHO LIVES, WHO DIES, WHO TELLS YOUR STORY CHAPTER FIFTEEN

Who Lives, Who Dies Who Tells Your Story

Natasha Romanoff x Fem!Reader

Summary: Natasha and Reader get into an accident that leaves Natasha in critical condition. When she wakes up, it’s revealed that she has amnesia and doesn’t remember her life, her wife, or her children.

Masterlist | General Masterlist

Follow my update page @natsxaddiction2

W/C:7K

Natasha strode purposefully through the winding hallways of the Avengers Compound. The place was empty as she was learning was the norm for this time of day. She was anticipating your arrival at the compound at any minute. Today, she opted for a laid-back outfit. She wore a pair of well-worn, fitted jeans that hugged her curves, and a simple, loose-fitting black t-shirt graced her upper body, its fabric soft and comfortable against her skin. Rolled-up sleeves hinted at her toned arms, a testament to her strength and agility. When she picked her clothing, she thought of something relaxing and flexible enough to run around with two children for the entire weekend. 

 As she turned a corner, her brisk pace led to an accidental collision with another person.

"Sorry, I wasn't..." Natasha's words trailed off as she took in the person she had bumped into. It was Melina. Melina regarded Natasha with a mixture of surprise and concern.

"Natasha? You’re still here?" Melina's voice held a hint of disbelief.

Natasha's heart skipped a beat, and she struggled to compose herself, avoiding direct eye contact. "Melina... I didn't expect to see you here," she responded, her voice tinged with guarded caution.

Melina's gaze softened, and she took a step closer. "I heard you were staying. I wanted to see you and talk to you," she said softly, her concern evident.

Nervously, Natasha scanned the empty hallway, searching for a means of escape. However, before she could make her getaway, a familiar voice reached her ears.

"Natasha! There you are!" The voice belonged to Alexei. As he rounded the corner, a broad smile spread across his face. His eyes lit up with genuine enthusiasm.

"It's so good to see you, my little spy! How have you been?" Alexei's excitement was palpable, his joy at Natasha's presence unfeigned.

"Natasha, we've been wanting to talk..." Melina's voice carried a note of vulnerability, her words carefully chosen.

Natasha's eyes flickered with a mixture of resistance and uncertainty. The years of abandonment had left wounds that still ached within her, and she remained guarded, unsure of where she stood with them. The recent amnesia that had clouded her memories further complicated the already tangled threads of their relationship.

Seeking a chance to bridge the gap between them, Melina stepped forward, her voice infused with earnestness. "Please, Natasha, we've missed you. Can we just have a few minutes of your time?"

Natasha felt her resolve waver, a momentary glimpse of vulnerability breaking through her facade. The weight of their absence and the pain it had caused still lingered, but just as she teetered on the possibility of opening up, a car pulled up outside the compound.

In an instant, the jovial laughter of her daughter, floated through the air, accompanied by the sound of car doors slamming shut. Natasha's eyes widened with surprise, a wave of relief and joy washing over her conflicted heart.

"Excuse me for a moment," Natasha uttered softly, her voice laced with a newfound sense of purpose.

With determination shining in her eyes, Natasha pivoted on her heels and briskly strode toward the source of the commotion. Melina and Alexei watched her retreating figure, their brows furrowed with concern and uncertainty, feeling the opportunity for connection slipping away like sand through their fingers.

“She will come when she’s ready,” Alexei murmured to Melina as he leaned down to kiss her forehead. 

Left standing alone in the hallway, their longing to rebuild the fractured bond with their daughter remained unfulfilled, the ache of missed chances hanging heavily in the air.

*************************

Outside, a light dusting of snow covered the grounds of the Avengers Compound as Natasha stood at the entrance, eagerly anticipating your exit from the car. It had been a couple of weeks since their last visit, and now it was Natasha's turn to spend the weekend with them, just the three of them together.

Natasha's eyes lit up with warmth and anticipation, as you emerged from the driver's seat, carefully unstrapping Lily from her car seat with practiced ease. Olivia, a vibrant bundle of energy, followed closely behind, her tiny boots making a muffled thud on the snowy ground.

Olivia's excitement bubbled over as she spotted Natasha standing there, her face breaking into a wide grin. She bounded toward Natasha, her enthusiasm evident in every step.

"Mama! Hi, Mama!" Olivia exclaimed, her voice filled with glee.

Natasha crouched down, her arms open wide, ready to embrace the little whirlwind of energy. "Hello, Olivia! I've missed you so much," Natasha replied, her voice laced with genuine affection.

But just as Olivia reached Natasha, her little boots slipped on the icy ground. In an instant, you who had been right behind her, reacted with lightning speed, catching Olivia before she fell. You hiked Lily higher on your hip as you helped Oliva to stand up correctly. 

"Whoa there, let’s calm down a little," You said with a chuckle, steadying Olivia and lifting her safely back onto her feet.

Olivia giggled, her wide eyes shimmering with a mixture of excitement and relief. "Thanks, Mommy," she said, her voice filled with adoration.

You grinned, ruffling Olivia's hair affectionately. "You're welcome, my brave girl," you replied, only letting her go wehn you’re sure she’s going to behave. 

With Olivia now secure, Natasha rose to her feet, her heart filled with warmth at the sight of the little family she had come to cherish.  The atmosphere quickly changed, holding a hint of tension, akin to a custody trade-off, as you approached, carrying the diaper bags and backpack.

You handed the bags to Natasha without a word, your gaze momentarily meeting Natasha's before diverting your attention to the excited children. Lily cooed softly in your arms, seemingly unfazed by the subtle awkwardness that hung in the air.

Olivia tugged at Natasha's coat, vying for her attention. "Mama, look! I want to make a snowman!" she exclaimed, pointing to the piles of snow covering the usual green fields. 

Natasha smiled warmly, her eyes twinkling with affection. "How about later? We can do whatever you want this weekend," she suggested, momentarily distracted from the underlying tension.

As Olivia continued to chatter excitedly, Natasha seized the moment to break the silence. She turned to you her voice filled with genuine curiosity. "So, what do you have planned for the day? Do you need to get back home soon?" Natasha asked, attempting to navigate the unspoken uncertainties between you.

You hesitated, your gaze flickering with a mix of curiosity and apprehension. You searched Natasha's face, attempting to discern her true intentions. Finally, you responded, your voice laced with a hint of uncertainty. "I don't have any specific plans. Why do you ask?"

Natasha's features softened her genuine concern for you evident. "I just want to make sure everything is going well for you," she replied, her words filled with a mixture of empathy and genuine care.

Your guarded demeanor melted slightly, revealing a glimmer of vulnerability. "I appreciate your concern, Natasha," she responded softly, her voice tinged with a trace of longing. “I have a thing with Theresa and her daughter later on today.”

“Right, Theresa,” Natasha didn’t like how the name sounded on her tongue at the moment. 

“Well,” You passed Lily over to her, the toddler bouncing excitedly in her arms, as she was finally in her Mama’s arms. “I’m going to go and say hi to Wanda before I head back out.” 

“Right,” Natasha nods. She definitely understands this level of cordiality is all you can give at the moment. She turns her attention back to the girls. It’s best to get them inside before they freeze. You step around them, heading for Wanda’s suite on the other side of the building. 

Balancing Lily in her arms and clutching the diaper bags and backpack, Natasha made her way back toward her suite. Olivia, the little chatterbox, trailed closely behind, her voice filled with an incessant stream of words about her daily activities at home.

Olivia's excitement spilled forth, as she animatedly described playing with her toys, her favorite meals, and the cartoons she loved watching on TV. Natasha listened attentively, her attention divided between Olivia's animated tales and the task of managing everything in her arms.

As they walked, Natasha's injured arm twinged, a subtle reminder of her own vulnerability. She juggled the bags, trying to find a comfortable grip, but her attention was divided, making the task more challenging than it should have been.

Olivia, unaware of Natasha's distraction, continued her lively narration. "And you know what, Mama? Mommy took us to Target! It's my favorite store ever! We got new toys and snacks. Can we go to Target too?"

Natasha's lips curled into a gentle smile, finding comfort in Olivia's innocent enthusiasm. "That sounds like a lot of fun, Olivia," she replied, her voice warm and affectionate.

They reached the entrance to Natasha's suite, and she carefully set the bags down, momentarily relieved of their weight. Lily gurgled contentedly, her tiny fingers reaching out toward Olivia.

Natasha turned her attention fully to Olivia, crouching down to her level, her injured arm cradling Lily securely. "Olivia, I would love to take you to Target sometime. Let’s get inside first then we can plan," she said, her voice filled with genuine affection.

Olivia's eyes lit up with joy, her excitement practically tangible. “I like planning!!" she exclaimed, unable to contain her enthusiasm.

Natasha's heart swelled with tenderness, her momentary distraction replaced by a shared connection with Olivia. Natasha entered her suite, carefully cradling Lily in her arms and setting down the bags. Olivia, her curiosity unyielding, gazed up at Natasha with wide eyes.

"Is Mommy going to stay here too?" Olivia asked, her voice filled with hopeful anticipation.

Natasha knelt down, meeting Olivia's gaze with a gentle yet firm expression. "No, sweetheart. It's just you, me, and Lily for the weekend," she explained, her voice laced with both tenderness and honesty. "We'll have a special time together, just like we used to."

Olivia's face fell slightly, her disappointment evident. "But I like all of us together," she murmured, her voice low and sad.”Like at home.”

Natasha's heart ached at the complexity of the situation, torn between nurturing Olivia's desire for connection and protecting her from the intricacies of the situation. She reached out, gently placing a hand on Olivia's shoulder.

"I know you miss it, Olivia. It's okay to feel that way," Natasha reassured her, her voice soft and comforting. "We'll make the most of our time together. I promise."

Olivia's expression brightened slightly, a sense of trust and understanding shining through. She leaned into Natasha's touch, finding comfort in her warm embrace.

"Now," Natasha continued, her voice brightening with anticipation, "We have the whole day ahead of us. What activity would you like to do? We can go on a nature walk though it’s very cold outside, play with your dolls, or even have a tea party."

Olivia's eyes widened with excitement, her mind racing with possibilities. "Can we build a giant fort, Mama? And then have a tea party inside?" she suggested.

Natasha grinned, her own excitement mirroring Olivia's. "That’s actually a good idea. Let me find everything and we can start."

As Natasha and Olivia began to gather supplies, laughter filled the air, replacing any lingering uncertainty with a shared sense of adventure. In that moment, Natasha's heart swelled with gratitude for the opportunity to create lasting memories and provide a sense of stability and love for the two little girls in her care.

**********

You made your way to Wanda's suite, the corridors of the Avengers Compound a familiar path. As you approached, you could hear the melodious strumming of a guitar. You knocked on the door a few times, patiently waiting for her to answer. Wanda engrossed in her music, paused as she noticed your arrival.

"Hey, y/n! Come on in," Wanda greeted, setting the guitar aside. She wore a warm smile, grateful for the company. It had been a while since you both had a chance to catch up.

You settled into a nearby chair, scanning your surroundings. There was much to discuss, so many unspoken thoughts and reservations.

“I can feel your judgment from here,” Wanda rolled her eyes. 

“I’m not judging,” You argue. “The place simply looks interesting.” If by interesting you mean cluttered. Wanda seemed to have a never-ending pile of books on her coffee table, laundry everywhere, and even a chest full of clothes on the other side of the room. This could only mean she has a busy mind at the moment. 

“Mhmm,” Wanda hums. "So, what's been going on?" She asked.

You hesitated for a moment, choosing your words carefully. "Things have been... complicated. Natasha and I are still trying to navigate our relationship. It's not easy."

Wanda's eyebrows furrowed slightly, her expression hinting at a lingering skepticism. "She actually apologized to me, you know," she remarked, her voice softening. "Said she was sorry for everything that happened."

A flicker of surprise crossed your features, momentarily taken aback by the unexpected admission. It was nice to hear that Natasha had taken a step towards reconciliation. However, the wariness within you still held firm.

"That's... good," you replied cautiously, your voice filled with a mix of appreciation and wariness. "But forgiveness and trust take time, Wanda. I can't simply forget everything that happened."

Wanda's eyes held a glimmer of understanding, her voice gentle. "I know, y/n.Trust me.  It's just... after everything, it's hard to trust her completely. I'm still trying to find my way through it all."

You nodded in agreement, grateful for Wanda's unwavering support. "I understand. And I know it's not easy. But we have to remember that Natasha went through amnesia. She doesn't remember a lot of what happened. It's a process for her too."

Wanda's expression softened a subtle shift in her perspective. She leaned back in her chair, absorbing your words. "You're right. It’s not her fault. She could be a bit nicer about it.” Wanda shook her head. “Where are the babies?”

“With her,” You answered. “Probably driving her nuts like they’d done to me. Do you know, for the past week Lily refused to sleep for more than an hour? I’m deprived.”

“Tough,” Wanda grinned. “I’ve always liked you as a mom. You’re so much more easygoing in that realm of things.”

“Well, I’m glad you think so,” You sigh. 

You leaned back in the comfortable chair, the weariness of the past weeks weighing heavily on your shoulders. Your mind wandered, and in a moment of quiet surrender, you let out a soft sigh, muttering a phrase in Sokovian.

"U ležérk sa," You murmured the words a testament to your exhaustion.

Wanda's eyes widened, a smile dancing at the corners of her lips. "Ah. Feeling a bit tired, y/n?” she teased, her voice filled with gentle amusement.

You couldn't help but chuckle at her reaction, grateful for the levity she brought into the room. “Tired is an understatement,” You shake your head. “Let me hear you play.”

Wanda nods, a sheepish grin on her face, as she picks up her guitar again. As her fingers ran over the strings, she was transported to another place. You could see in her eyes the love she had for music. It was certainly a sight to see as you melted into the cushions of your chair. For now, you’d allow yourself this moment of respite. 

*******************

Natasha sat at the kitchen table, a high chair beside her where Lily was comfortably seated. A plate of small sliced fruits lay before Lily, an array of vibrant colors that captured her attention. Olivia stood beside Natasha, eager to contribute to the lunchtime activities.

Lily's big, curious eyes met Natasha's gaze as she pointed at each piece of fruit, her tiny hand reaching out inquisitively. "What ?" Lily signed, her hands moving with rapid succession as she held each one up. 

Natasha mirrored the sign for "apple," her voice accompanying the gesture. "This is an apple, Lily," she explained, enunciating each word clearly. "Apple," she repeated, emphasizing the spoken word as well.

Lily's face lit up, her own small hands attempting to mimic the sign. "Apple," she echoed, her voice sweet and melodic. 

As Natasha dedicated her attention to Lily, she also kept a watchful eye on Olivia, who was eager to contribute to the lunchtime preparations. Olivia's face scrunched up with concentration, her young mind working to form her request.

"I know!" Olivia exclaimed, her voice filled with excitement. "Let's make a sam-wich!" The mispronunciation of the word "sandwich" made Natasha's heart swell with adoration.

Natasha smiled warmly, her enthusiasm mirroring Olivia's. "That's a great idea, Olivia," she replied, her voice brimming with encouragement. "We can make sandwiches together.”

“Yeah, and maybe, um, maybe Mommy will eat sam-wich with us,” Olivia pondered as she walked over to the counter. She stood on a step stool, patiently waiting for Natasha’s next move. 

Olivia's eyes sparkled with hope, her imagination already painting a picture of a shared meal. 

As Natasha rose from her seat, she carried Lily's high chair to the counter, ensuring she was within sight while they busied themselves with the lunch preparations. She signed to Lily, explaining the process, while also speaking aloud to include her in the conversation.

The kitchen came alive with activity as Natasha and Olivia worked side by side, assembling sandwiches with love and care. The sandwiches in question were ham and cheese paninis that Olivia claimed to be her favorite. Olivia's pride shone through as she presented each creation to Lily, eagerly describing the ingredients with a charming mixture of toddler babble and enthusiasm.

The kitchen buzzed with activity as Natasha and Olivia prepared the sandwiches, their laughter filling the air. As you passed by, Olivia's bright eyes locked onto you, her excitement uncontainable. She jumped from the stool, calling out your name as she approached you.  She tugged at your hand, practically dragging you towards the kitchen.

"Mommy, come eat with us, please!" Olivia pleaded, her voice filled with anticipation and hope.

Your initial reluctance lingered, uncertainty etching your features as you glanced between Natasha and the children. But Olivia's infectious enthusiasm slowly eroded your hesitation.

"Alright," You relented, a soft smile forming on your lips. "I'll join you for lunch."

Hand in hand with Olivia, you entered the kitchen, the atmosphere shifting as you took a seat at the table. Natasha greeted you with surprising warmth, gesturing for you to make yourself comfortable.

As you settled down, the room filled with the joyful babbling and animated conversations of the children. Olivia's voice bubbled over with excitement as she talked about any and everything that was on her mind. 

Olivia, her face beaming with excitement, sat at the kitchen table between you, her tiny hands clasped together. She looked like a little business lady as she spoke. The remnants of her lunch scattered across the table as she began to share her thoughts.

“Mommy and Mama, I love being here with you!” Olivia said seriously. 

“We love being here with you too, Olivia. What do you enjoy the most about being at the compound?” Natasha prompted with a smile. 

“I like... I like everything! We play and have fun! And we go on adventures!” Olivia listed. 

“There are a lot of exciting things to do here.” You agree.

“And you get to meet other friends too, right? Like Wanda and the others?”

“Oh, yes! I play with Wanda and other friends. We have so much fun!” Olivia bit into the last piece of her panini. 

“This sandwich is really good. How’d you know it was my favorite?” You ask. You look between Natasha and Olivia. 

“It was my idea. Well, Olivia wanted sandwiches but I decided to go for these,” Natasha shrugs. “I didn’t know they were your favorite. That’s good to know.”

You nod. You don’t want to think that it’s her consciously remembering but you can’t help it.   

The atmosphere at the table grew heavy with an awkward silence, and you exchanged uncertain glances with Natasha. The tension between you was still apparent, and it’s quite difficult trying to make that connection when you don’t know how Natasha is going to react. So far, she’s been decent. Reserved. Maybe she’s tired of all the fighting too. Maybe she’s finally happy you left her alone. 

It was in this tense moment that Lily made her desires known. With her tiny hands, she signed the word for milk, her eyes pleading. Natasha's eyebrows furrowed slightly, a flicker of unease crossing her features. You could see she felt out of her element, unsure of how to respond.

But despite the lingering tension, Natasha recognized the importance of nurturing the bond with Lily. Softly, she responded to Lily's plea.

"Okay, Lily," Natasha whispered, her voice filled with tenderness. "Up we go."

As you observed this exchange, a surge of gratitude and sincerity washed over you. You leaned towards Natasha, a genuine appreciation in your voice.

"Natasha, I appreciate you stepping up despite everything that’s going on, "You confessed. Her eyes flashed to yours briefly. “You’re doing a great job with them.” 

Your eyes met, a mix of vulnerability and determination shining through. Natasha nodded, acknowledging the significance of the moment, and carefully scooped Lily into her arms. A sense of tenderness enveloped the room as she unbuttoned her top and began to nurse, momentarily soothing the lingering awkwardness.

As Lily nursed, the tension began to dissipate, making way for a gentler atmosphere. In this vulnerable exchange, a flicker of hope sparked, promising the potential for healing and growth.

This weekend would be the second time she’s kept the girls since coming back to the compound. She’s been able to explore what life is like on her own. She understands the needs of her family at this time and she feels she’s making progress. She feels lighter as she nurses Lily, aware of your eyes on her as she continues. She hopes she’s doing the right thing. 

**********************************

You stepped into the quietness of your home, feeling the weight of the solitude settle around you like a heavy shroud. It had been hours since the vibrant laughter of Olivia and Lily filled the air, and the absence of their energy left a noticeable void.

As you moved through the familiar spaces, the toys scattered across the floor caught your eye, a bittersweet reminder of the joyful chaos that once defined your home. The stillness now seemed to echo with their absence, making the emptiness all the more heartbreaking. You know it’s only temporary. It’s just a weekend. As a mother, you should be jumping with joy for a moment alone. You feel the complete opposite. Being alone means you have more time to think. You have more time to ruminate and dwell on things you’ve pushed down. 

Yelena, having chosen to distance herself from Natasha for the time being, had left you alone to navigate your own desires. Yelena was a girl that loved her. She felt things for people, she often didn’t want to, and surprisingly this change was a lot for her. So she did what she needed to. She’d left Fanny to you while taking another top secret mission she wouldn’t tell you about. While you respected her decision, you couldn't help but feel a sense of longing without the connection that Natasha and the girls brought into your life.

Sinking into a comfortable chair, you pondered the possibilities that lay before you. With the freedom to do as you please, your mind wandered through the choices. You could lose yourself in the pages of a captivating book, immersing yourself in stories that whisked you away to different worlds. Or maybe you could indulge in a favorite hobby, finding solace and purpose in the familiar activities that brought you joy.

Yet, as you sat in the quiet of your home, your heart yearned for something more. It craved the noise and laughter, the chaos and love that filled the space when Natasha and the girls were present. The absence of their vibrant energy left you longing for the connection and the shared moments that had become the highlight of your days.

Taking out your phone, you sent a message to Theresa to cancel for the night. You’re not truly in the mood for guests. You settled into the comfort of the chair, allowing the weight of solitude to envelop you.  The stillness in the room seemed to amplify the thoughts swirling in your mind. Resting your hands on the armrests, you took a deep breath, ready to release some of the magic within you.

Closing your eyes, you summoned your power, feeling the vibrant energy surge through your veins. The air around you crackled with anticipation as a soft purple glow enveloped your palms. 

With each exhale, you released a small portion of your magical essence, letting it dissipate into the room. The gentle aura of purple shimmered, casting a calming ambiance around you. As you continued this ritual, the weight of the day began to lift, and your mind found a momentary respite.

You reflected on how different your life had become. The accident, the girls, and life without Natasha. Everything was so different and you still couldn’t tell if this was for the better. 

The purple glow of your magic flickered, dancing in harmony with your thoughts. You haven’t been caring for yourself like you should. You have been attached to someone, child or spouse, for so long you’ve forgotten what it’s like to be alone. You breathed slowly, reminding yourself of your essence, and opting to sit with your thoughts for a little longer. As the glow gradually faded, you opened your eyes, feeling a sense of calm wash over you. The room still held echoes of the residual magic, your eyes tracing the dissolving hues before you wiggled your fingers, bringing yourself back to the present world. 

You sat in the chair, lost in your thoughts when you felt a gentle nudge against your leg. Looking down, you saw Fanny, curling up beside you. A small smile played on your lips as you leaned down to pet Fanny, finding comfort in her presence.

"Fanny, you always know how to make me feel better, don't you?" you said softly, your voice filled with tenderness. "Thank you for being here, you're such a good listener."

Fanny wagged her tail, her eyes filled with understanding. At that moment, the unspoken bond between you and your temporary furry companion brought solace and a sense of peace.

After a while, you gently patted Fanny's head and stood up, feeling a newfound tranquility washing over you. It was time to indulge in a well-deserved bath, a moment of self-care to ease your mind and worries.

As you ascended the stairs, Fanny's soft footsteps followed behind. Grateful for this small gesture of support, you entered the bathroom and filled the bathtub with warm water, watching as the steam rose and filled the room.

Taking a moment to reflect on the day, the challenges, and the moments of love, you felt a weight lifting from your shoulders. With each step you took, you felt a sense of renewal, knowing that you possess the strength and resilience to navigate whatever lies ahead.

Slipping into the steaming hot water, you allowed yourself to unwind. The quiet air of the bathroom became a sanctuary, a space for introspection and renewal.

*****************

The room was dimly lit, a soothing ambiance created by the soft glow of a nightlight. Natasha sat on the edge of the bed, exhaustion etched across her face, as she tried to calm Olivia, who was in the midst of a temper tantrum. Lily watched with wide eyes from her crib, unsure of what was happening.

“I want Mommy! I miss her!” Olivia whined as she folded her arms. 

Natasha's heart ached at Olivia's words. She understood the pain and longing the little girl felt, missing her other mother. Natasha had been trying everything she could think of to ease Olivia's distress and help her settle into sleep, but her attempts had been in vain so far.

“Olivia, I know you miss Mommy. I'm here with you, and I love you very much. Let's try to calm down, okay? Take some deep breaths with me.”

Natasha demonstrated deep breaths, hoping Olivia would follow suit. However, the tantrum persisted, and Olivia's cries grew louder. Natasha reached out to gently stroke her back, trying to offer comfort amidst the chaos.

“It's okay to be sad, sweetheart. We all miss Mommy sometimes. But right now, I'm here for you. Let's find a way to help you relax and feel better.

Natasha tried different tactics, pulling out Olivia's favorite stuffed animal and singing a lullaby softly. She rocked back and forth on the bed, hoping the familiar routine would lull Olivia into a state of calmness. Yet, the tantrum showed no signs of subsiding.

Feeling her own patience tested, Natasha fought back her own weariness, determined to find a solution. She would have to go against her better judgment and ask for help. 

Natasha stood outside Wanda's suite, holding Olivia tightly in one arm while Lily clung to her other arm. A mix of embarrassment and desperation coursed through her, as she hoped Wanda could offer assistance in calming Olivia's distress. With a hesitant sigh, she knocked on the door.

Wanda opened the door, her expression immediately reflecting concern as she took in the distraught trio standing before her.

"Natasha, what's wrong? Come in, all of you," Wanda said softly, stepping aside to welcome them inside.

Natasha entered the room, her gaze filled with a mix of vulnerability and apology. She spoke hesitantly, her voice betraying her unease.

"Wanda, I'm sorry to bother you, but Olivia is having a really hard time tonight. I thought maybe being here with you could help," Natasha explained, her words laced with a touch of embarrassment.

Understanding the gravity of the situation, Wanda nodded empathetically.

"Of course, I can help," Wanda reassured, her voice brimming with compassion.

Wanda knelt down, extending a comforting hand towards Olivia with a gentle smile. However, the overwhelmed little girl's distress intensified unexpectedly. In a moment of frustration and confusion, Olivia bit down on Wanda's hand, causing Wanda to wince in pain.

"Olivia, no! That's not how we express ourselves, sweetie," Wanda exclaimed, her voice a mix of surprise and concern. She inspected her hand, finding that the bite was superficial, as she sighed. 

The room filled with tension as Natasha rushed to intervene, gently pulling Olivia back to look at her. 

“Olivia, we don’t hurt people,” Natasha lightly scolded her. Apparently, this was the wrong thing to do. Olivia, still overwhelmed by her emotions, turned and bit down on Natasha's arm.

"Ow! Olivia, please, we can't hurt each other," Natasha winced, her voice a mixture of pain and gentle admonishment.

Despite the discomfort, Wanda remained composed, understanding the underlying turmoil Olivia was experiencing. She attempted to redirect Olivia's attention, offering words of reassurance and guidance.

"Olivia, it's okay to feel upset, but we need to find healthier ways to express ourselves," Wanda said softly, her voice steady and calm. "Can you tell me how you’re feeling?."

Olivia's rapid breaths gradually slowed as she attempted to mimic Wanda's deep breaths. “I-I want Mommy,” Olivia whined. “I want to go home.” Olivia sobbed. Something about hearing her say that broke Natasha’s heart. In her arms, Lily began to show her own distress, making it known that she wasn’t happy about being awake past bedtime. Natasha shushed her, rubbing her back soothingly, as she kissed her forehead. 

“Olivia, you’re going home tomorrow,” Nataha kneeled. “I thought we could sleep together. Have a little fun. In the morning your mom will be there.”

“No, no, no,” Olivia shook her head. “I want Mommy now.”

“I know, baby,” Natasha sighed. It truly sucked to not understand how to console your child. 

Wanda observed the exchange, her concern evident on her face. She offered a potential solution.

"Hey, Natasha, maybe I should shoot a text to y/n and let her know what went down," Wanda suggested, her tone reflecting genuine care.

Natasha paused for a moment, considering Wanda's offer. However, she mustered a small smile and shook her head gently, responding in a contemporary way.

"Nah, thanks, Wanda. I appreciate the support, but I got this. I think it's best if I handle it on my own," Natasha replied, her tone a blend of gratitude and determination.

Understanding Natasha's desire to take charge of the situation herself, Wanda nodded, her eyes conveying unwavering support.

"Got it, Natasha. " Wanda said, her voice filled with empathy.

With a nod of gratitude, Natasha guided Olivia and Lily towards the exit, wrapping her arms protectively around them. There was one last thing she was willing to do. 

*************************

You trail down the stairs, flicking on the foyer light, as you wrap the tie of your black silk robe a little tighter around your waist. Through the window’s glass, you can see Natasha, clearly in her pajamas, and cold, carrying both girls in her arms. Lily is sleeping, her head cradled between Natasha’s neck and shoulder, and Olivia is in her other arm wide awake and fighting her sleep. You open the door, a gust of wind sending a chill down your spine, as you hold your arms out. Natasha steps closer so that Olivia can fall into them. You hold her against your chest, frowning at her slight sniffling and shaking body, as you rub her back in soothing circles. 

“She wouldn’t sleep,” Natasha says lowly. “Last night or tonight.” There’s a hint of defeat in her voice and you feel bad for her. You actually feel bad for her. She's out of her element. Taking care of children she hadn’t known before this month and there’s a lot expected of her. “I tried a song, um, warm milk. Taking her to Wanda and Steve. She missed you.” Natasha explains and you nod. 

“Come in,” You invite her in, stepping aside so that she can be relieved from the chilling temperature. You can see her teeth chatter, the rosiness of her cheeks, and her lack of a jacket. She would catch her death if she kept coming outside like this, but not on your watch. Natasha immediately walks over to the living room where she lies Lily down on the loveseat. She takes the cover from the back of the couch to throw it over her tiny body. Lily doesn’t startle at all. In fact, she turns over and makes herself more comfortable. 

“Want you, Mommy” Olivia whines. There are big crocodile tears sitting in the corners of her eyes, her mouth formed into a pout, and a wrinkled brow as she continues to whimper. 

“It’s okay, baby, I’m here,” You whisper to her. You kiss her forehead, hoping to ease some of her worries. You take a seat on the couch next to Lily’s sleeping form. You rock Olivia in your arms, whispering to her about how she’s okay, how much you love her, and how she’s safe here. She doesn’t settle for a long while. For a second, you forget that Natasha is in the room as you comfort your daughter. Olivia is too worked up. Eventually, she forces her small, cold hand into your robe, her hand finding its resting place along your collarbone. Her other hand, middle and ring fingers, go into her mouth, and she self-soothes in the only way she knows how when she’s this upset. She just needed to feel you. A few moments later, Olivia is sleeping, still hiccuping, though you know it’s a long time coming.

You glance over to Natasha. She’s leaning against the wall, clearly uncomfortable, and you can tell she is lost in thought. 

“Nat,” You attempt. You know you’re not on good terms but you still need to talk with her. You’d like to know how she’s feeling. Olivia’s meltdowns are intense and without experience, they can be overwhelming. “Come, sit.” You offer and you’re almost sure she’s about to say no. She bites her lip, debating whether or not she should go, but you know better. She comes to sit on the other side of Lily. She looks between both girls. 

“I have a few bite marks,” She mumbles. “Olivia’s baby teeth seem more like adult teeth.” Natasha attempts to joke. You look at her arms in concern. You can see the dark circles under her eyes. Ones to match yours. She hasn’t been getting enough sleep on top of driving an hour to bring the girls to you. Because Olivia wouldn’t sleep. Olivia wants to be in her own bed. Not in the cold walls of the compound. That isn’t her home. It’s not a place for a child and you both know that. “I-I don’t know what I’m doing. I didn’t know how to help her,” Natasha shakes her head. “She got so upset and I tried everything and…”

You let her speak. You can guess how Olivia’s tantrum went. A few broken valuables, an injured parent, and crying never seemed to stop. She’s gotten so much better now but these changes are throwing her off-kilter. You’d like to say the situation sounds familiar. You want to say you know how it feels to try your best and it still not be enough. You’re not the type to say “I told you so” no matter how much you want to. 

“It happens,” You say. “Olivia is a toddler with trauma. She values routine, structure, and normalcy. All of us do I think: You sigh. “Something we haven’t been giving her.”

Natasha nods. She knows that. 

“What do I do?” She asks and you smile gently. 

“Keep being there,” You answer. “I know it sounds simple but in those moments don’t leave her. Let her know you love her. Give her time. Allow her to feel what she feels and try again.”

All words you have lived by.

“Let’s get them to bed,” You suggest. 

You walked silently up the stairs, Olivia snuggled in your arms as you made your way to the bedroom. Natasha followed close behind, Lily resting peacefully in her arms. The weight of the evening's events lingered in the air, creating a silence between you. 

As you reached the girls' bedroom, you gently guided Olivia to lie down, tucking her in with a tender touch. Natasha mirrored the action, carefully placing Lily in her crib, her eyes filled with a mix of love and concern. Once the girls were settled, you and Natasha retreated to the hallway, your gazes meeting briefly.

In the quietness of the moment, Natasha took a deep breath, summoning her courage to break the silence. Her voice was sincere, expressing her remorse for her earlier hostility.

"I want to apologize again," Natasha began, her words laced with genuine remorse. "I know I've been defensive and distant, and it's not fair to you or the girls. I want to be better, to be more supportive and understanding."

You looked at Natasha, your eyes searching for the truth behind her words. The tension that had built up seemed to hang in the air, but there was a glimmer of hope that they could find a way to bridge the divide between them.

"I appreciate that, Natasha," You responded, your voice soft but guarded. "I know all of this isn’t easy.” You gesture back to the girls. “I’ve always known it wouldn’t be easy for you. I’m not expecting you to get over something you are still fresh about. What I did back then. Those were choices I’ve made and had to live with.  I hope that eventually, we can build trust again.”

Natasha nodded, understanding the weight of those words. She knew that rebuilding trust required consistent effort and understanding, but she was determined to make amends.

"It’s possible," Natasha affirmed. "I don’t know what all of this means for us. This separation. This time I’ve spent at the compound. It’s given me some time to think.”

“About how boring the guys are?” You jest and she smirks. 

“That too,” Natasha nods. “There was a reason we started something all those years ago. There’s a reason we worked for this long. I, um, when I said I couldn’t love you. That was not what I meant.” Natasha looks to see if you believe her words. “I’m so hung up on my past. It’s a part of my being. It’s who I am. It’s not who I want to be.”

"I want a do-over from this day forward," Natasha spoke, her voice filled with a mix of determination and vulnerability. "I know we can't go back to how things were, and I can't promise I won't struggle or make mistakes. But I want to try. I want to build something better for us and for the girls."

Your gaze softened as you listened to her words, understanding the depth of pain and anger you both carried. You knew the reluctance that guarded your own heart, aware of the risks involved. Yet, you also recognized the sincerity and genuine desire for change in her voice.

"I won't lie, Natasha. I'm still afraid. Afraid of losing what we had, afraid of history repeating itself," You admitted. "But I also see the pain you're going through, and I know it won't be the same. We can't expect it to be."

She nodded, acknowledging your fears and reservations. She understood the importance of rebuilding trust and knew that blind trust was not what either of you needed.

"We can't recreate the past, and I don't expect you to trust me blindly. It's going to take time and effort to rebuild what we had," She reassured, her voice steady.

You saw the raw honesty in her eyes, the genuine desire to change and grow. It both scared and comforted her.

"I want our marriage to be strong again, Natasha. I want to trust you and feel secure," You expressed.”Like I said from the time you woke up, I’m here for you. As your friend. As your wife."

She nodded. She could understand that. 

“I understand,” Natasha clasped her hands together. She peeks her head into the bedroom again, making sure that the girls are asleep before she sighs. “I should probably head back to the compound.”

You think about what time it is and how dangerous it is to get back to the compound in snow and darkness. You can’t let her go outside like this. 

“I can’t let you do that,” You direct your chin towards the guest bedroom. “It’s yours for tonight. If you want it.” You shrug. 

Natasha’s reaction is way quicker than you were expecting. “I’ll take it.”

If you made it this far - you have to tell me what you liked or didn't like right?

Who Lives, Who Dies, Who Tells Your Story Chapter Eighteen

Who Lives, Who Dies Who Tells Your Story

Natasha Romanoff x Fem!Reader

Summary: Natasha and Reader get into an accident that leaves Natasha in critical condition. When she wakes up, it’s revealed that she has amnesia and doesn’t remember her life, wife, or children.

Masterlist | General Masterlist

Follow my update page @natsxaddiction2

w/c: 7.7k

Note: Another chapter

Natasha sat at a secluded table within the training facility. The soft scratch of a pen against paper filled the air as she diligently transcribed case notes into an old-fashioned notebook. To her, this method was a touch of familiarity in a rapidly evolving world.

As she focused on her task, a playful voice cut through the quiet corner she had claimed.

"Hey, Natasha, still clinging to the prehistoric method, huh?"

She looked up to find Sam Wilson smirking down at her. A glint of amusement danced in her eyes.

"Sam, some things are timeless," she replied, a hint of a smile tugging at the corner of her lips.

He chuckled, leaning in slightly and playfully nudging her shoulder. "Yeah, like you, I guess."

With a dry humor, she returned to her notes, ignoring his gentle ribbing. He continued to grin at her, unrelenting.

"You know, they have these things now, they're called computers," he continued, a teasing lilt in his voice. "They're like magic for note-taking."

Her eyes flickered up to meet his, her tone equally dry. "Magic that can be hacked, Sam."

Sam's grin widened, his banter-loving nature undeterred.

"You're something else, Nat."

Meanwhile, Natasha's focus was interrupted by the sight of Steve across the training area. As if Sam's comments were a cue, he sauntered over, sporting a sly smile.

"Speaking of old-school, Nat, isn't it about time someone taught Steve how to ask a girl out in the 21st century?"

Natasha couldn't help but smirk, her gaze shifting to Steve who was immersed in a training routine. She set her pen down, her amusement evident.

"Sam, leave Steve alone. He's been busy saving the world."

But Sam wasn't one to let up easily. "Yeah, yeah, I know. But come on, the guy's been single for, what, years? And he still hasn't figured it out?"

Her eyes danced with mirth, the memory of their conversations often circling this topic. She chuckled softly.

"You know, it's almost funny, considering I'm the one with amnesia, and he's the one who still can't quite manage it."

Sam laughed aloud, the camaraderie between them palpable. "Right? The world's a strange place, Nat."

“What are you two laughing about?” Steve raised a brow, a hand on his hip, as he stepped over to their corner of the room. 

“The fact that you can’t get a girl,” Natasha said bluntly, a playful smirk on her face. 

"Well, Nat not everyone can be married to bombshells," he retorted, a glint of mischief in his eyes.

Natasha chuckled at Steve's defense, her gaze shifting between the two men. Sam laughed along, shaking his head.

"True that, Cap," Sam conceded, raising his hands in mock surrender.

Steve's reply was accompanied by a soft chuckle as he turned his attention to Natasha, his expression fond. "Besides, I think some of us enjoy keeping things a bit more... old-fashioned."

Natasha met his gaze, her own eyes warming. There was an unspoken understanding between them, a shared appreciation for the simplicity of certain things in a complex world.

Sam, undeterred, decided to prod further, pointing to Natasha. "You hear that, Nat? Steve's defending himself."

She raised an eyebrow in mock contemplation. "Is that so?"

Steve's cheeks turned a faint shade of pink, but his grin remained steady. "Well, I'm just saying, it's not always easy navigating the modern dating scene. Some of us are more comfortable in our era."

Sam chuckled, shaking his head. "And here I thought being a super-soldier was enough to charm anyone."

Laughter and friendship floated in the air, a comforting backdrop to the dynamic trio's banter. Natasha's pen continued its rhythmic dance on the paper, capturing not just notes but also a sense of belonging she cherished.

In this easy exchange, Steve's demeanor shifted slightly, his eyes growing more earnest as he cleared his throat. "Hey, before we get too carried away, I wanted to let you both know that we have a meeting with General Ross later."

Natasha's eyebrows raised slightly, her interest piqued. Ross wasn't exactly her favorite person within their network.

Sam leaned back against the table, crossing his arms. "Ah, Ross.” 

Natasha glanced at Sam, her curiosity evident. "What's the meeting about?"

Steve's expression remained steady, tinged with a hint of seriousness. "It's about a new lead on that black market operation we've been tracking. Ross has some intel he wants to share."

Natasha's lips tightened almost imperceptibly. Ross had always struck her as a man with his agenda, often at odds with their methods and objectives. She shifted her gaze back to Steve, her thoughts momentarily lost in contemplation.

Sam's cryptic smile reappeared, and he tilted his head toward Natasha. "Remember Ultron, Nat? Our friend had a little run-in with Ross."

Natasha's brow furrowed as she thought back, but the memory eluded her. She glanced between Sam and Steve, a mix of curiosity and intrigue painting her features.

Steve's lips quirked into a wry smile as he explained, "Yeah, there was some... tension. We'll leave it at that."

Natasha's interest was fully piqued now. Her past, the parts that had been erased by amnesia, remained a puzzle she was constantly trying to piece together.

"Well, I guess I'll find out," she mused, a determined glint in her eyes.

Sam nodded, his grin warm. "Yeah, you will. But hey, it's good to have you back in the loop, Nat."

Natasha's lips curved into a genuine smile. It was true, that being part of this team, and sharing these moments, made her feel alive and connected in a way that she had missed during her recovery. Her pen continued its dance across the paper, capturing not just notes, but a renewed sense of purpose.

*********************

The meeting room was a hub of activity, the Avengers gathering once again to discuss their ongoing operations. Natasha sat at the long table, her gaze sweeping over her teammates. The room seemed different from the last time they had convened here, and her eyes lingered on the changing dynamics.

She watched as Steve, Sam, and Tony exchanged thoughts, their companionship evident even in their discussions. The team had evolved since its early days, and the faces around the table were a testament to that change.

Her mind traveled back to a time when she had been one of the only women in the room, aside from Pepper Potts and Maria Hill. But now, the team has grown and expanded. Wanda, with her incredible powers, was a formidable presence, and you, though absent right now, a recent addition, had proven yourselves with determination and skills that fit right in.

The absence of Thor and Bruce Banner was notable. They had gone their separate ways, Thor back to Asgard and Bruce on a journey of self-discovery. Natasha had always appreciated the unique perspectives they brought to the team, but she also recognized that change was a constant in their line of work.

As the conversation carried on, Natasha found herself leaning back slightly in her chair, her fingers tracing absent patterns on the polished table surface. She listened as Steve, Sam, and Tony debated the intricacies of the new black market intel, but her mind wandered.

The familiar words and discussions seemed almost routine to her, a testament to the many meetings they had endured over the years. It was in moments like these that she couldn't help but feel a hint of boredom, her thoughts wandering to more engaging challenges.

The meeting room's discussions were interrupted as the door swung open, and Agent Ross entered with a few guards in tow. Natasha's brow arched in subtle curiosity at the added security presence. It seemed a tad excessive for a routine briefing, even one involving sensitive intel.

Agent Ross took his place at the head of the table, his posture conveying authority. Natasha's gaze never left him, her observant eyes assessing the situation. She had dealt with Ross before, and their interactions had rarely been smooth.

"Good afternoon, Avengers," Ross began, his voice carrying the confidence of a man accustomed to power. "I appreciate your promptness."

Natasha's gaze remained steady, and she raised an eyebrow. A silent question as she wondered why he felt the need for extra security. Ross continued without acknowledging her unspoken inquiry.

"We've obtained new intel on the black market operation that's been causing disturbances in the city," he said, his gaze sweeping over the assembled team. "We've reason to believe this operation is more extensive and dangerous than initially thought."

As Ross delved into the details, Natasha's mind began to churn. She had learned over time that challenging Ross's assumptions often led to more revealing answers. She raised her hand, her tone casual but her intent challenging.

"Agent Ross, forgive me if I'm mistaken, but it seems a bit excessive to bring guards to a routine briefing. Is there something you're not telling us?"

Ross met her gaze evenly, his expression guarded but unruffled. "Ms. Romanoff, recent developments warrant heightened security. We need to be cautious, especially given the sensitive nature of this information."

Natasha's lips twitched into a half-smile, her eyes narrowing slightly. "Sensitive enough to warrant guards in a room full of Avengers?"

Ross didn't waver, his response measured. "It's a precaution, nothing more. Now, let's focus on the matter at hand."

Natasha wasn't satisfied, but she knew when to let a point drop. She settled back in her seat, her eyes never leaving Ross as he continued discussing the operation.

However, the conversation took an unexpected turn when Ross's gaze shifted toward your empty chair. "Speaking of precautions, it has come to my attention that Y/N isn't present."

Natasha's brows furrowed, her guard instinctively rising. She had no love lost for Ross, but she couldn't fathom his issue with you. She leaned forward slightly, her tone a mixture of curiosity and challenge.

"Agent Ross, I'm intrigued. Care to explain your concern?"

Ross hesitated, his gaze flickering between Natasha and the empty chair. "Y/N's... abilities, and those of Wanda Maximoff, are unique. Their involvement could potentially complicate matters."

Natasha's lips quirked into a bemused smile. "Are you suggesting that magic is a liability in this situation?"

Ross's expression remained guarded, but his resolve was clear. "I'm suggesting caution. We need to be mindful of the potential ramifications of involving such unpredictable elements in an operation of this nature."

Natasha's smile turned slightly enigmatic as understanding dawned. "Ah, I see. You're worried about not being able to control them."

Ross met her gaze evenly, his tone measured. "I'm worried about the safety of everyone involved, including the civilians we're here to protect."

Natasha's posture remained composed, her expression a mix of curiosity and challenge. She listened as Ross laid out his concerns about involving you and Wanda, your unique abilities casting a shadow of uncertainty over the proceedings.

"Agent Ross," Natasha interjected, her tone even, "I understand your caution, but let's not forget that each of us brings a range of skills and risks to the table. Isn't it a bit shortsighted to single out individuals with exceptional abilities?"

Ross met her gaze with unwavering resolve, a hint of tension underscoring his words. "Ms. Romanoff, I am well aware of the capabilities of everyone here. I am simply advocating for a strategic approach."

Natasha's eyes shifted to Wanda, who was seated across the table. She couldn't help but wonder why the young woman didn't jump in to defend herself. Wanda's gaze was fixed on her lap, evading Ross's scrutiny. It was a contrast to the fiery spirit Natasha had seen in her before.

Ross's tone shifted as he mentioned you and Wanda's past involvements. Natasha's fingers tightened imperceptibly around the edge of the table. The implications of Ross's words were clear, and she didn't appreciate the way he was framing the narrative.

"You're saying that incidents like Lagos and Sokovia were solely the doings of Y/N and Wanda," Natasha's voice was edged with skepticism.

Ross's gaze remained unyielding. "It's not an accusation, Ms. Romanoff. It's a factual assessment of events."

Natasha's eyes narrowed, and her voice held a steely edge. "Factual assessments can be twisted to suit different narratives."

Before the conversation could spiral further, Natasha decided to confront the insinuations head-on. "Agent Ross, speaking of accountability, let's not forget certain events that happened under your watch. I seem to recall the creation of the Abomination and the chaotic events that unfolded during your tenure."

Ross's lips tightened, his demeanor remaining composed despite the barbs. "Ms. Romanoff, I was following orders—"

Natasha cut him off, her voice rising slightly. "And what about the unchecked pursuit of the Hulk? Or the Sokovia Accords debacle?"

Ross's gaze flickered, and Natasha pressed her point. "You've made your share of mistakes, Agent Ross, and yet you've never been asked to keep your mouth shut or step down."

The room fell silent as the weight of Natasha's words hung in the air. She had shed light on the double standards, and the expectations placed on those with extraordinary abilities while the more mundane failures of authority figures were brushed aside.

Steve Rogers cleared his throat, his voice steady as he steered the conversation back on track. "Alright, let's focus on the matter at hand. We all want to ensure the safety of our city."

Natasha's attention shifted back to Ross, her gaze unwavering. She had challenged his assumptions and motives, reminding him that accountability was a two-way street.

****************************

The meeting had finally concluded, the tension in the room dissipating as the Avengers filed out, leaving Natasha and Wanda behind. It was only the second time they found themselves alone together, and an air of quiet camaraderie lingered.

Wanda hesitated before speaking, her voice soft and appreciative. "Natasha, I wanted to thank you for speaking up back there. It means a lot."

Natasha offered a small smile, her eyes meeting Wanda's. "Defending you was the right thing to do."

Wanda's gaze held a mixture of gratitude and determination. "I can take the insults, Natasha. It's Y/N that's usually more affected by them."

Natasha's brow quirked, her curiosity piqued. "Y/N?"

Wanda nodded, her expression somber. "She has magic, and people like Ross... they don't understand it. They don't trust what they don't understand."

Natasha understood the sentiment all too well. The world had always been wary of the unknown, and your unique abilities made her a target for scrutiny.

"But you chose this life, didn't you?" Natasha asked gently. "You chose your powers and to step up as an Avenger."

Wanda's gaze held a quiet resolve. "Yes, I did. I made those choices to make things right, to use my abilities for good."

Natasha nodded, her respect for Wanda deepening. The young woman's determination mirrored her journey, the path of redemption, and the pursuit of justice.

"I've made my share of choices, some I'm proud of and others I'm not," Natasha admitted, her voice tinged with honesty. "But one thing I've learned is that we can't let others define our worth."

Wanda's lips quirked into a small smile. "You've faced your demons, Natasha."

Natasha's smile mirrored Wanda's. "And I'll keep facing them. We all will."

As the meeting's echoes faded, Natasha and Wanda remained in the quiet of the room, their bond strengthened by their shared experiences. A subtle shift in the atmosphere prompted Natasha to change the direction of their conversation.

"So, Wanda," Natasha began, a playful glint in her eyes, "I'm planning a date night for Y/N. Any suggestions?"

Wanda's lips quirked into a knowing smile, and her eyes sparkled with amusement. "You're asking me for advice on a date?"

Natasha shrugged nonchalantly, a hint of mischief in her expression. "Well, you've been around for a while now. You’re her sister. You must have picked up a thing or two."

Wanda's gaze held a thoughtful intensity. "You know, Y/N isn't exactly a fan of crowded places. She prefers lowkey and intimate settings."

Natasha's brows furrowed as she considered Wanda's words. "That's true. I want her to be comfortable."

Wanda's eyes lit up as an idea formed. "Why not take her to that little café near the park? It’s close to your house. It's cozy, quiet, and has a lovely view."

Natasha's lips curved into a smile, appreciating Wanda's suggestion. "That's a great idea. Thanks, Wanda."

Wanda's smile was warm and knowing. "You've got this, Natasha. For what it’s worth I’ve always rooted for you to work out."

“Thank you,” Natasha says quietly. She doesn’t know why that means so much to her but it does. With a nod of appreciation, Natasha turned to leave the meeting room, the gentle reminder of Wanda's advice guiding her steps. 

*******************************

You stood in front of the mirror, turning to gaze at the back of your outfit. You bit your lip in contemplation, your gaze flickering between the three outfits you had tried on. The anticipation of your date with Natasha pulsed through you, a mix of excitement and nervousness.

With a sigh, you discarded the first outfit—a flowy skirt and blouse that felt a bit too formal. The second, a pair of jeans and a tucked-in blouse joined the pile on the bed. Your fingers brushed over the fabric of the third option—a snug-fitting sweater dress. The creme hue complemented your complexion, and you couldn't help but smile.

As if sensing your indecision, Olivia watched intently from the bed. Beside her, Lily played with a pacifier and a tissue paper from one of the discarded shoe boxes. You chuckled softly at the distraction your little companions provided.

"Alright, girls," You addressed them with mock seriousness, "what do you think? Is Mommy ready for her date?"

Olivia's bright eyes narrowed in thoughtful consideration, and she nodded with a solemn expression, her tiny voice chiming in, "Pretty, Mommy!"

You laughed, your heartwarming at Olivia's approval. Lily, absorbed in her tissue paper play, seemed content to offer a few giggles in response.

Satisfied with Olivia's endorsement, You set to work adding the finishing touches. You chose delicate hoop earrings that framed your face and adorned yourself with light, elegant jewelry. A glance in the mirror reassured you—this was the outfit. It was comfortable and stylish, and you felt like yourself.

You couldn't resist the pull of Lily's infectious giggles any longer. You gracefully hopped onto the bed, your dress bunching around your hips. Lily's eyes widened in surprise as you joined her, and then her face broke into a radiant smile. Giggles erupted from the little girl, a symphony of pure joy.

"Hi, my sweet Lily," You cooed, leaning in to give your daughter a barrage of gentle kisses on her chubby cheeks. Lily's laughter bubbled even more, filling the room with its melody.

Olivia, always eager to be part of the action, crawled over, her curiosity piqued. Your attention shifted to your older daughter, and you offered a playful wink.

"Now, how about some kisses for Olivia too?" You asked, your voice brimming with warmth.

Olivia giggled, her face lighting up. She leaned in, allowing you to pepper her with soft kisses. 

As you turned your attention back to Lily, your heart swelled with love. You gently plucked the pacifier from Lily's mouth, your daughter's protesting pout making you chuckle.

"Sorry, sweetie," You whispered, giving Lily's pacifier a playful twirl in your fingers. "I promise it's for a good cause."

Lily's eyes fixed on you curiosity evident. And then you leaned in, your noses almost touching, and planted a series of tender kisses on Lily's cheeks and forehead. Lily's pout quickly transformed into a giggle-filled grin, her tiny hands reaching up to grasp your fingers.

Olivia, not one to be left out, tugged on your sleeve. "Mommy, who are you going on a date with?"

Your smile softened as you looked at Olivia. "I'm going on a date with Mama.”

Olivia's eyes widened in understanding, and then she beamed. “Oh, can I go?”

“Not this time,” You shake your head. “You’re going to be home with Rae tonight. Don’t you like Rae?”

“I do,” Olivia nods seriously. “I can show her my toys.”

You nodded, your heart full as you looked at your children. Lily had managed to free her pacifier from your grip and triumphantly popped it back into her mouth, her joy apparent.

With a final round of kisses for both Olivia and Lily, you gently rose from the bed, the sound of their laughter following you as she made her way to the bathroom. You needed to finish getting ready. 

*******************

Natasha approached the door to your home, her heart thrummed with excitement and nerves. It had been a while since she had been on a date, let alone one that held so much significance. In her hand, she held a bouquet, a gesture she hoped would convey the depth of her feelings.

As the door swung open, revealing Olivia with a bright smile, Natasha's breath momentarily caught. She felt a rush of emotions at the sight of the tiny girl. She swallowed her nerves and managed a warm smile.

"Hey there, baby girl," Natasha greeted.

Olivia's smile widened as she looked at Natasha, her eyes sparkling with excitement. "Mama, you brought flowers!"

Natasha chuckled softly, feeling a sense of relief at Olivia's enthusiasm. "Yes, I did. These are for your Mommy.”

Olivia nodded, her curls bouncing with her movement. "They’re so beautiful and happy."

As Natasha waited for you to appear, her heart raced.  The door finally opened wider, revealing your form, and Natasha's breath hitched at the sight.

She offered a tentative smile, her voice carrying a hint of warmth. "Hey."

Your eyes softened, your gaze sweeping over Natasha with a mixture of fondness and happiness. "Hey, Nat. Come on in." You stepped aside for Natasha to walk in. 

“Did she answer the door on her own?” Natasha questions referring to Olivia who trailed behind you. 

“No, I was always right here,” You assure her. 

Natasha stepped inside further, her eyes trailing to your backside and then to your house.  As she met your gaze, you shared a brief yet intimate smile, the depth of your connection evident in your eyes.

A hug ensued, a comforting embrace that communicated unspoken feelings. And then, as you pulled back, Natasha's nerves faded slightly, replaced by a sense of contentment. She held out the bouquet, her expression a mix of anticipation and hope.

"I brought these for you," Natasha said, her voice soft but sincere.

Your eyes lit up as you took the bouquet, your fingers brushing against Natasha's in the process. You looked at the flowers, your smile growing.

"These are my favorite flowers," You said, your voice filled with genuine delight.

Natasha's heart swelled at your response. She reached out to gently brush a strand of hair behind your ear, her touch lingering for a moment. "I remembered. I mean, not really, but I picked those because they seemed like something you would like."

Your smile was radiant, her eyes sparkling as they held Natasha's gaze. "Thank you, Nat."

You and Natasha readied yourselves for the date. The smiles exchanged between you were infectious, capturing the anticipation of the evening's plans.

During your preparations, Olivia and Lily observed with wide eyes, their curiosity piqued by the flurry of activity as you excused yourself to grab your purse. You stopped in front of the hallway mirror, making sure your appearance was perfect. Lily's gaze seemed fixated on the earring you were adjusting, while Olivia watched with rapt attention.

With a warm smile, you looked at Olivia and Lily. "You two will be on your best behavior for Rae, won't you?"

Olivia nodded eagerly, her enthusiasm evident. "Yes, Mama. I can be a good girl."

Natasha knelt, her presence reassuring. "Remember, if you need anything or have any issues, just tell Rae, okay?"

Lily reached out her arms, a clear sign she wanted to be included. Natasha couldn't help but chuckle as she lifted the little one into her arms, placing a gentle kiss on Lily's forehead.

"You take care and listen to the babysitter, Lily," Natasha whispered, her voice soft.

Your arms opened for a hug, and Olivia stepped into the embrace, holding on tightly. "You'll be good and look after Lily, won't you?"

Olivia nodded, her face brightening. "I promise, Mama."

Kneeling, Natasha met Lily's gaze with a tender smile. "And you, Lily. You'll be a good girl too?"

Lily's response was a delighted grin, her hand reaching out to gently touch her cheek.

With a final round of hugs, you and Natasha made your way toward the door, your hearts full. As you left the room behind, your shared look held the promise of a special night ahead.

With Olivia and Lily in capable hands, the two of you ventured into the world outside, fingers intertwined. The excitement of new memories and the warmth of your love propelled you forward, ready for the experiences that awaited.

***************

As you and Natasha stepped into the dimly lit café, the melodies of live music gently embraced you. The warm ambiance and soft chatter created a cozy atmosphere that felt both inviting and intimate. Natasha's hand rested on the small of your back, her touch guiding you further into the space. With a shared smile, you let her lead the way.

The stage was bathed in a warm spotlight, a solitary microphone waiting for the next performer. The room was filled with a mix of hushed conversations and the soft strumming of a guitar, setting the stage for an enchanting evening.

Your eyes glimmered with curiosity as you looked around, taking in the sights and sounds. "I've heard about this place, but I've never actually been to an open mic night."

She chuckled softly, leaning closer to you. "Well, get ready for an eclectic mixture of talent. You never know what you're going to get."

A singer took the stage, their voice smooth and captivating. Your attention was fully captured by the performance, a testament to the charisma of the live music.

Impressed, you turned to Natasha with an appreciative nod. "You were right. This is better than I expected."

Natasha leaned in, playfully whispering, "I have impeccable taste, you know."

Your lips quirked into a smirk. "I'll give you that one."

As the evening progressed, the music's variety and the energy of the crowd kept your attention captivated. Every so often, Natasha's foot tapped to the rhythm, a subtle sign of her enjoyment. You couldn't help but smile at the sight.

"Getting into the groove?" you teased, raising an eyebrow.

Natasha glanced at you with mock seriousness. "I've been known to groove on occasion."

You chuckled, appreciating her sense of humor. "Oh, I'm sure. The Black Widow with some dance moves, huh?"

Natasha's eyes sparkled mischievously. "Only when the mission calls for it."

The transition to a more upbeat song drew both your attention and the infectious melody making it hard to resist tapping your foot along with the beat. Natasha's gaze met yours, her lips curving into a playful smile.

"Care for a dance?" she quipped, her tone light.

You raised an eyebrow, feigning surprise. "Agent Romanoff, are you trying to sweep me off my feet?"

Natasha's chuckle was rich and warm. "I might be."

The banter flowed between you effortlessly, a comfortable exchange of words that felt as natural as the music in the background. As the rhythm of the music pulsed through the air, a playful challenge passed between you and Natasha. With a knowing glint in her eyes, she extended her hand toward you, a silent invitation to the dance floor. You couldn't help but smile, your heart dancing to a beat that matched the music's tempo.

Accepting her hand, you rose from your seat, drawn into the world of the song. The space around you seemed to blur, fading into the background as you and Natasha came together on the dance floor. The spotlight's gentle illumination painted the scene, casting a soft glow over your figures.

As the music enveloped you, you found yourself moving in perfect harmony with Natasha. Each step, each sway was a testament to the unspoken connection that had been growing between you. It was as if you were engaged in a dance that went beyond the physical, a dance of souls that resonated with every movement.

Natasha's grace and fluidity were no surprise; you had seen her in action many times before. But there was something different tonight, an energy that seemed to infuse every sway, every twirl. It was as if the music was a conduit for her emotions, a way to express herself beyond words.

But what truly impressed you was the way Natasha's gaze never left yours. Her eyes held a mixture of intensity and tenderness, a silent promise that you were in this together, moving to the same rhythm, navigating the dance floor as partners.

You moved with a synchronicity that came effortlessly as if you had been dancing together for a lifetime. The world around you faded, leaving only the music and the connection that bound you together. The way Natasha's fingers brushed against yours, the way she guided you through turns and dips—it all spoke of a deep understanding that went beyond the present moment.

In those moments, you felt a glimpse of the person Natasha had become—the fighter, the survivor, the woman who had learned to open her heart again. And as the song came to an end, you found yourselves caught in a final, graceful spin, ending in a pose that felt like a testament to the night's magic.

The applause from the audience broke the spell, and Natasha's gaze held yours for a moment longer before she offered a warm smile. The depth of connection you felt was mirrored in her eyes, a reflection of the shared experiences and emotions that had led you to this point.

The dance had been more than just a physical act—it was a conversation, a celebration of the journey you were on together. As the night continued, you were eager to learn more about each other, to share stories and moments that would strengthen the bond that was growing between you.

Back at your seats, the afterglow of the dance lingered in the air. Natasha's demeanor had shifted to one of easy charm and playful flirtation, but you saw past the facade. You had known her long enough to recognize the subtle shifts in her behavior, even when she tried to mask them.

With a knowing smile, Natasha leaned back in her seat, her fingers tracing the rim of her glass. "So, what do you think? Not bad, right?"

You chuckled softly, meeting her gaze with an understanding glint in your eyes. "Nat, you don't need to impress me like this."

Natasha's eyebrows quirked, her smile retaining its playful edge. "Oh? And what makes you think I'm trying to impress you?"

Your gaze held a warmth that matched the gentle lighting around you. "Because I know you. I know when you're being the Natasha Romanoff, and I also know when you're slipping into the Black Widow act."

For a moment, Natasha's expression remained unchanged, her guard seemingly intact. But then, something shifted in her eyes, a realization dawning. The playful facade faltered, revealing a more vulnerable side.

"I didn't even realize I was doing it," Natasha admitted, her voice softer now.

You reached across the table, your fingers finding hers in a reassuring touch. "Nat, you don't need to put on a show for me. I'm already sold."

Natasha's defenses seemed to crumble in that moment, and she let out a sigh, her shoulders relaxing. She leaned into your touch, her gaze meeting yours with a mixture of gratitude and vulnerability.

"You've always seen through me, haven't you?" Natasha's voice held a hint of self-reflection.

You offered her a reassuring smile. "It's because I know you—both the Black Widow and the woman behind it. And I love every part of you."

Natasha's lips curved into a genuine smile, her fingers gently intertwining with yours. The tension that had momentarily hung between you dissolved, replaced by an intimacy that was more genuine than any act.

"Thank you for reminding me," Natasha said softly, her voice laced with a depth of emotion.

Natasha's gaze turned slightly thoughtful, and she took a sip of her drink before speaking. "Speaking of encounters, I saw Ross earlier today."

You raised an eyebrow, intrigued. "And how did that go?"

Natasha's lips quirked into a wry smile. "About as well as you might expect. He seems to have a knack for never quite getting along with me."

You rolled your eyes, your tone tinged with exasperation. "Ross and his grudges. He's had it out for me and Wanda for the longest time."

Natasha nodded, a hint of agreement in her expression. "You're not wrong. He's been wary of anyone with powers, especially after that whole Sokovia incident."

You leaned back in your seat, your demeanor confident. "Well, I've learned not to let his paranoia dictate my life. I can't live based on others' fears and prejudices."

Natasha's gaze softened, her admiration evident. "You've come a long way, you know? It's not easy to stand up to that kind of pressure."

A subtle smile played at the corner of your lips. "Well, I've had a good teacher."

Natasha chuckled, a glint of playfulness in her eyes. "Flattery will get you everywhere."

As the evening continued, you found yourself exchanging first-date questions once again. It was a bit amusing, considering you already remembered all the details from your past conversations, but you were doing it for Natasha's sake. Her amnesia was a challenge you both faced, and you were determined to make her feel comfortable and engaged.

With your natural storytelling abilities and charming smile, you answered each question, sharing anecdotes and experiences that painted a vivid picture of your life together. Natasha seemed captivated by your stories, her gaze never leaving you as you spoke.

"So, what's the most interesting thing you've done?" Natasha asked, her eyes curious.

You leaned back in your chair, mulling over the question. "Well, a couple of years ago, you helped me achieve something pretty significant. I got my high school diploma."

Natasha's eyebrows raised in surprise. "I did?"

You nodded, your expression fond. "Yeah, Hydra wasn't big on academics, but with your support, I studied and earned my diploma. It was a turning point for me."

Natasha's lips curved into a proud smile. "I'm glad I could help."

As the conversation continued, you couldn't help but notice Natasha's intrigue when you mentioned your plans for the future. "I want to go back to school for biology," you said. "I'm passionate about wildlife rehabilitation."

Natasha's interest was palpable, her curiosity evident in her eyes. "Wildlife rehabilitation? That's quite a unique choice. What drew you to it?"

A genuine smile graced your lips. "I've always had a connection to animals. After everything I've been through, I found comfort and purpose in caring for them. I want to study biology to understand their needs better and work towards protecting their habitats."

Natasha's admiration was clear, and she regarded you with a newfound respect. "That's incredibly commendable. It takes a lot of dedication and heart to pursue something like that."

You shrugged modestly. "I know it's not what's expected of me, but it's where my passion lies."

Natasha's gaze softened, and she reached across the table to touch your hand. "Your passion is what makes you who you are. And I'm glad I get to know this side of you."

Sitting together in a quiet moment, you felt a surge of inspiration bubbling within you. The topic had been on your mind for a while, and now seemed as good a time as any to share it with Natasha.

"You know," you began, your voice taking on a thoughtful tone, "I've been thinking about the future. After Lily, Olivia, and... well, you know."

Natasha's gaze met yours, her curiosity piqued. "What have you been thinking?"

A warm smile tugged at your lips as you painted a picture with your words. "I've always had this dream of opening up a center. A haven where injured or orphaned animals could be cared for and eventually released back into the wild."

Natasha's eyebrows raised in pleasant surprise. "That sounds like an incredible idea. I can see how much it means to you."

You nodded, your enthusiasm evident. "And here's the thing—I've been imagining it as something we could all do together. A family venture, you know? Lily and Olivia could join in too. I know they’re still little.” 

The idea seemed to take root in Natasha's mind, her expression softening with a mixture of interest and appreciation. "That sounds like a beautiful dream, y/n."

You paused for a moment, a hint of sadness entering your gaze. "Originally, I thought it would be something for the future after everything had settled down and we had the new baby. But... well, things have changed because of the accident."

Your words trailed off, and you realized that you might have inadvertently conveyed a sense of frustration or resentment. Hastily, you clarified, "I didn't mean to sound upset. It's just that things are different now, and our priorities have shifted."

Natasha's hand reached for yours, her touch gentle and reassuring. "I understand, y/n. And you're right—our plans might change, but that doesn't mean they're abandoned. We'll find a way to make things work, step by step."

Your words lingered in the air, the shared dreams and vulnerabilities creating an intimate connection between you and Natasha. The atmosphere felt charged with honesty, and as you looked into her eyes, a question that had been on your mind suddenly slipped out.

"What changed for you, Natasha? What made you want to give me a chance?" you asked, your voice gentle but curious.

Natasha's expression shifted, a mixture of contemplation and emotion crossing her features. She took a moment to collect her thoughts before answering.

"When I woke up from the coma, I was... volatile, to say the least," Natasha began. "I wasn't willing to give anyone a chance, especially when it came to the idea of a family. It scared me."

You listened, your heart open to her honesty.

"But the more time passed, the more I realized how lonely I'd let myself become," Natasha continued, her gaze distant as if retracing her journey. "I had built walls around me, and I thought I was protecting myself. But I saw how those walls hurt others, especially you."

You couldn't help but remember the moments when Natasha had pushed you away, her pain evident even when she tried to hide it.

"I saw that you were afraid of me, just a little," Natasha admitted, her voice softer. "And that hurt more than I expected. I was the one who was supposed to protect you, yet my actions were causing you pain."

Her vulnerability was a testament to how far she had come, how much she had grown since waking up from her amnesia.

"I realized that I was standing in my way," Natasha continued, her eyes locking onto yours with a profound intensity. "I realized that I would be an idiot to lose something so pure, something that had the power to heal my wounds."

Her words hung in the air, the weight of her confession settling around you.

You reached across the table, your hand finding hers in a gentle and reassuring touch. "Natasha, you've come so far. And I'm grateful that you let me be a part of this journey with you."

Her fingers intertwined with yours, her grip firm and steady. "It wasn't easy, but it was worth it."

****************************

As you and Natasha stepped through the door, the familiar comfort of home surrounded you. With Lily and Olivia already tucked into their beds, the house felt calm and peaceful.

Rae smiled as she gathered her belongings. "The girls were great tonight. They're such sweethearts."

You nodded, grateful for her care. "Thank you, Rae. We appreciate it."

Once Rae left, an unexpected awkwardness settled between you and Natasha. The natural ease you had felt during the date seemed to have been replaced by a slight tension.

Natasha cleared her throat, her gaze slightly diverted. "So, I guess it's getting late."

You nodded, your fingers playing with the hem of your sleeve. "Yeah, we should probably... go to bed."

Silence lingered for a moment, the weight of unspoken thoughts hanging in the air.

Finally, Natasha met your gaze, her eyes searching and vulnerable. "Y/n, about tonight..."

Before she could finish, you took a step closer, closing the gap between you. "Natasha, I wanted to ask... if you'd like to stay? You know, here."

Her eyes widened, a mixture of surprise and uncertainty in her gaze. "Stay?"

You nodded, your voice soft but steady. "Yeah. I mean, if you're comfortable. We can take it slow, and you can leave anytime if you want. But I'd like you to stay."

The vulnerability that had marked the entire evening seemed to intensify as you laid your feelings bare. Natasha's expression softened, her walls seemingly crumbling before your eyes.

 "I... I want to stay," Natasha said, her voice equally soft. "I want to be here, with you."

A warmth spread through your chest, and you couldn't help but smile. "Then stay."

“It’s settled then,” She matched your smile. 

“Olivia wants to make a fort in the morning so you should get some rest,” You grin at her. “She’s not taking no for an answer.”

“I won’t have it any other way.” Natasha laughed.