Menelaus - Tumblr Posts
What Homeric character do you think actually needed glasses and walked around half-blind?
Agamemon:We have to talk about a serious problem
Diomedes:Odysseus lack of childhood/family trauma ?
Menelaus:yes, it's so weird right ?
Priam:it's really cute how you gone deffed us with the power of Friendship and all. But we are Troy, with the Walls bild by GODS Menelaus:you motherfucker you didn't let me finshed, a 1000 ships Priam:dadah, I don't cear, I do not cear
After the Oath of Tyndareus
Menelaus :I would also like to give a shout out to my fellow nominees. Who will now and forever, be know as the guys that lost to the Fucking Ginger, Second second son, of greeks most cursed family
Rip helen and Menelaus, you would have loved medical marijuana
I’m reading this essay that’s honestly like 14 pages long about how Homer actually made Menelaus an extremely Soft Boy and I’m never going to forgive every adaption for forgetting this
tfw the other Greeks aristeias involve them just kicking Trojan ass but Menelaus’ is specifically about protecting Patroclus’ body…
like
soft recognizing soft
TRUE ENOUGH INDEED, OP
like the euripides helen did not survive against all odds, for people to stop the himbofication of menelaus in favor of making helene live even more tragic
I'm happy that the "Helen is of Sparta, not Troy" post is getting seen and people are giving love to her as they should but I'm getting a wee bit frustrated by the Menelaus inclusion with the whole "She was a possession to others and never had a choice".
Yes, Helen is a victim of fate and multiple horrible circumstances. She gets kidnapped by Theseus and Paris. So much blame is being put on her when she really isn't at fault and doesn't have much choice.
A choice she made though? WAS MENELAUS!
The Oath of Tyndareus was all about how "If you want to have a chance of marrying her, you have to swear to respect her and her choice and defend their marriage if it's needed".
If anything, Menelaus was her "prize"! Not the other way around!!! And they are clearly shown caring for one another!!! uyfuygluhyutfugy
It always Achilles is a teen girl this,
Achilles acts like a then girl that,
but Menelaus is bachilly Cady from mean girls and you just let him get away with it.
Remeber to ship Helene × Menelaus for Maximum Trojan war angst
And then nothing bad happened ever
Odysseus:sometimes I cheat in uno Menelaus:WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT ?? Odysseus:so I win Diomedes:win what, dishonor Odysseus:STOPP Menelaus:stop dishonoring yourself
Menelaus trying to do an icebreaker: So what is your funniest childhood trauma ? Odysseus: my what ?
Hc that Odysseus feels a little left out because he's the only one who doesn't have childhood trauma to share.
Hermione:I am a nepo baby, and there for better than you
Hermione: It's giving daddy issues. BITCH WHERE ?! Let's get one thing straight and to things gay, I have that man wrapped around my pinky finger. Daddy issues where ?!
-Menelaus
leave me in a room with odysseus and one of us is going to come out of there pregnant and it's not going be me
iliad tumblr simulator
🦉 ithacasfavguy Follow
boss is asleep. currently on a quest to steal some wine
🦉 ithacasfavguy Follow
stop reblogging this i'm gonna get caught you fuckers
#/srs
(729 notes)
🌻 achilles Follow
hahaha it would be so funny if i got so deathly drunk my hot doctor boyfriend had to escort me to the infirmary and pin me down so i dont end up stabbing someone and holding me by the hair to force my chin up and make me drink medicine hahahahaha
#please #pleaseee #i am so gay rn
(2,486 notes)
🚬 menelaghh Follow
i miss my wife
(215 notes)
🦢 helen Follow
currently having the time of my life. everything is great. except my new husband. i hope he dies
#captive princess life
(8,632 notes)
🐌 patrokloss Follow
never thought id have to say this but please do not try to make homemade wine with random shit you find on the woods ?? a guy just died
#psa #medicine
(371 notes)
👤 hektoroftroy Follow
guys im gonna be honest the worst thing to ever happen in my life was my brother coming back
🐭 parisbutitsnotfrance Follow
:((
👤 hektoroftroy Follow
you are literally on my DNI. this is your fifth account. please go away
(420 notes)
💪 jaxajax Follow
why are all the animals coughing to death?
#is this normal #vets of tumblr answer me
(13 notes)
🦦 die-a-medes Follow
these trojans ain't shit 😂😂😂 we'll be winning this easy fr
🦦 die-a-medes Follow
girl help it's been ten years
(824 notes)
👁 cassssandra Follow
being haunted by visions can be very fun actually
#therapist told me to be positive #trying
(5 notes)
🐭 parisbutitsnotfrance Follow
hello
🐭 parisbutitsnotfrance Follow
stop telling me to kill myself???
(8,753 notes)
🌻 achilles Follow
i hope you nerds name men on men attraction after me when i die
#if this doesnt happen then what is the point
(10,942 notes)
Funny that wasn't Agamemnon the one ruining it up
(゜ロ゜)
Diomedes: this is so embarrassing guys I'm so sorry!
Agamemnon: it's not that bad
Odysseus: as you should be
Menelaus: don't be sorry!
Nestor: WHAT do you MEAN you fucked up again do you need YOUR BEAUTY REST so you can stop being A DISGRACE to the whole army I swear I will-