B99 - Tumblr Posts
The best thing about 2019 so far has been Andy Samberg’s hair.
[Peraltiago at a restaurant]
Jake: So, how is the most beautiful person in the world?
Amy: I don’t know Jake, how are...
Gina from under the table: I’m doing great Jake, thanks for asking.
Holt, in the background: CHEDDAAAAR
She looks at him with so much love. I CAN’T😍😍😍
Gif stolen from @peraltiago-s
Jake and Amy: *gazing into each other’s eyes*
Gina: *opens a soda*
Jake: We were having a moment.
Gina: And I’m having a soda.
Amy normally: Fuck capitalism. It's a rigged system that keeps us poor and it isn’t fair. You shouldn’t need to work 3 jobs to afford basic necessities.
Amy playing Monopoly: Sorry, if you wanted to win you should have tried not being poor.
ok, so im rewatching b99 for like the 3rd time and i noticed smth interesting. so in s3ep14 karen peralta, its jakes birthday and his mum makes him blue cake, his favourite, and i mean the other times i watched it i didnt even think about it, but considering that percy jackson is very fresh in my mind due to the new series on disney, my mind clocked it and i was like, blue cake! like not a particular flavour, just blue cake! and then u hav the parallel of jake having an absent father, the same way percy had an absent father, just the symbolism of blue food ig
I dreamt of Blossom as Any Santiago from Brooklyn 99. I thought you should know, it looked great. It checks out coz BC would be Rosa, Bubbles would be Charles (I'm thinking sorely on personalities, ranks and/or sex have nothing to do with it) Brick could be Holt, Butch is either Jake or Hitchcock and Boomer would be Scully or Terry. Also, Princess is Gina
10/10 AU
I think Butch has to be Jake and Boomer has to be Terry because Boomer would 100% drop whatever he was holding to catch Butch in his arms
"If I die, turn my tweets into a book and sell it" - Jesper Fahey, Six of Crows
Sirius, talking to regulus: Listen, I know your spirit animal is a catipillar that’s been stepped on, but mine is the mighty wolf
This is the best comedy! (That’s the name of my s3x tape.)
Brooklyn Nine-Nine: First look at season 6 (EW.com)
Like Gina, the Nine-Nine is aiming to keep it 100: After being cancelled by Fox in May and quickly revived by NBC, the beloved cop comedy returns to the air on Jan. 10 at 9 p.m. ET with a new set of cases and conundrums to be tackled newlyweds Jake (Andy Samberg) and Amy (Melissa Fumero) and precinct captain/possible NYPD commissioner Raymond Holt (Andre Braugher). There’s much to preview, including the departure of Gina (Chelsea Peretti) and the return of the Pontiac Bandit (Craig Robinson), so start reading to see what to expect in season 6.
Did Holt get the big promotion, or will he stay with the precinct? “We resolve the cliffhanger in a very funny way, which will be the most satisfying way for the audience,” says Goor. “It’s a surprising resolution to the cliffhanger.” Hmmm, the squad looks a little concerned here…
Everyone looks happier here, so are Amy & Co. raising a glass to…. good news?
Whatever the verdict is, Jake will clearly strike the right tone. In related news, “There are some big moves in the premiere that set up the season,” says Goor.
Peretti announced earlier this year that she’s leaving the show sometime during season 6, which means that the Nine-Nine will be down a cocksure civilian administrator and former Floorgasm member. Don’t despair, though; Peretti will return as a guest star. “She’s not gone and her presence lingers over the show,” says Goor. “While I miss having her in every episode, there’s no question watching the show that she’s still a part of it.”
“Before Gina departs the precinct,” teases Goor, “she and Jake go on an undcercover mission to one of New York’s swankiest locales.”
Familial relations between Charles (Joe Lo Truglio) and Gina (Peretti) become strained, as well as strange. “The marriage between Charles and Gina’s parents causes drama between the two of them, as stepbrother and sister — and former lovers,” says Goor.
Yes, this means that Charles will don a disturbing Gina mask.
Rosa (Stephanie Beatriz) came out as bi in a winning story line last season, and her conservative parents had a hard time embracing the news, especially her mother. This season will continue to explore her sexuality and relationship with her parents. “We’re trying to honor the truth of how hard that can be,” says Goor. “We see how the schism between her mother and her has affected her.”
Jake and Rosa team up again, which may or may not explain why Rosa is wearing that wig. “In an episode that has echoes of ‘The Box,‘” teases Goor, “we spend an entire episode at a crime scene as Jake and Rosa try to figure out how a murder occurred.”
The Pontiac Bandit is back in action and full of misdirection! The ever-elusive and always charming car thief named Doug Judy (Craig Robinson) returns, with Goor sharing: “The Pontiac Bandit is back for more high jinks and songs about smushing.” What brings him back into the fold? “The question is: is the Pontiac Bandit back to his car-stealing ways, or is there a copy cat out there who’s stealing his moves?”
Jake’s star-crossed friendship with Jake “is tested once again,” says Goor, who also hints at a “shocking twist.”
Speaking of shocking, prepare to drop your jaws (no, not your drawers, Hitchcock) when an early season 6 episode transports you back several decades to bring you the story of Hitchcock (Dirk Blocker) and Scully (Joel McKinnon Miller). “Jake and Charles work a case and discover what made Hitchcock and Scully who they are today.”
What could these two possibly be talking about?
i’m not the main character,
i’m the closeted bisexual himbo
my guilty pleasure is when sitcoms get sad
BROOKLYN NINE-NINE 2.06 | “Jake and Sophia”
Dumb shit my friends have said
Im not gonna have names of the people
With great power comes great booty bitches
Broom broom bitch/toot toot motherfuckers/honk honk hoes
I want the gay one
Two bitches and a flying cooch
I will kick you so hard that your vertebrae will come out of you like a peez dispenser
Im too single for life/ no life is too single for you.
The straightest people are always the ones who act the most gayest/Being a gay architect is hard, none of the lines are straight/Being gay isnt as straightforward as people think/Life is lesbian/The ruler is the straightest thing in the room/The gays are the days/Lesbians are coming/Die Hate and cry/Home is where the bricks are/Dam they must've really hated gays before the 1980s, they even took the colours out of their tv's
You never know that god hasn’t had sex he could be the too shagger
Pleased is the tism
You’re as mentally stable as an earthquake
The sock makes it even more of a no.
Why does my hair have to be crustier than the bacon of an obese kid
I think I deserve a break.../Yeah you do but not from life
Just stop dying/simple./say no to death
They have the ability to sense boobs from miles away…/it’s true
I truly live in the darkest timeline where diverse and amazing shows like Brooklyn Nine Nine, The Get Down, and Sense 8 are canceled and Supernatural is on its 100th season and a show romanticizing suicide got renwed.