Loganpool - Tumblr Posts

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scene/vignette 1

Go West, Young Man

June 2027 Kansas city Missouri Earth-10005 

The song "Proud" by Heather Small plays

We open up our scene media rez, near the corner of Westport road and Broadway 

Deadpool in full red and black is marching in a parade, he's playing color guard holding a magenta, yellow and cyan flag. Only a few feet away Wolverine is in a new  yellow and brown uniform reminiscent of the John Byrne design but with more yellow Holding a pink, purple and blue flag. 

And I bet you're just dying to know how we got here.

Rewind back to March 2027

~on the 18th floor of One Park Place~

Moving men are dropping boxes off as Logan and Wade walk in, holding the more fragile cargo the good China and and several pounds of C4 explosive. Don't worry Logan had the box of detonators.

Wade had said it was only really a problem if they came together. It'd been in the coat closet at the old place for years. They really needed a better place to store stuff like this... Logan was taken aback by the expansive living room. Beautiful isn't it penut, and a fraction of the cost of anything this big in New York. They set their boxes on the marble counter of the open concept kitchen, "eat your heart out chip and jo-jo." they walked to the floor to sealing windows that overlooked downtown Kansas city.  You know Taylor Swift has a house in this city. She's with that cute football guy. 

"I prefer hockey," Logan said matter of factly

Wade looks out the window; It looks nice, and in the last 30+ years, it hasn't been the target of an alien invasion, kiju fight, or Giant universe destroying mcguffen. It's shockingly safe here, almost like it's an overlooked part of the country in pop culture.

Can we really afford this bub?

Penut we've been saving for almost two years, after that little hit job in Madripoor alone we had more than enough to cover it... they were paid handsomely to off the head of one of the local cartels. What resulted was an internal power vacuum that resulted in a 3 faction civil war significantly reducing their market share.

The rival gang that paid them added a hefty bonus for making it so easy to muscle in on their territory. We got a steal (literally, there may have been a little light gun play to talk the original owners down from 2 million) 1.5 million for a four bedroom 4.5 bath fuck ton sq foot mansion in the sky.

Logan knew that was easily 10.4 million in the shit part of NY. HAO fees are cheaper than we were paying in rent. Honeybadger.

Logan was still a little pissed that Wade had bought a condo with their money... mostly because Wade didn't talk to him about it. One night, they were having dinner with Laura she said she was transferring to UMKC. The closest thing they had to a discussion was Logan mentioning he didn't like her so far away.

They'd planned on leaving the city after she graduated. The plan was to stay there to be closer to her and saving money, then buying a house somewhere, not in Connecticut. The next thing he knew a few days later Wade had closed on a condo a thousand miles away and casually announced they were moving.

The fight they had was the ugliest in a while. "I THOUGHT WE WERE PARTNERS!? REMEMBER!? IN BUSINESS AND IN LIFE" "YOU SPENT 1.5 MILLION WHITHOUT SO MUCH AS ASKING ME.

"OUR MONEY BEING THE KEY WORD BUB" he'd yelled at Wade before giving him a full force claw punch to the gut... Wade slept on the couch that night. Logan didn't care how much Marry Puppens (or his own feelings about sleeping without Wade) objected.

He could only tolerate so much impulsiveness, and that took the cake... he didn't have problems moving to the midwest, Laura had transferred to UMKC and they both wanted to be close to thier daughter, but perhaps includ him in the decision, perhaps shop around before zeroing in on some luxury high rise.

Apart from the condo, Logan suspected Wade had a hand in Laura transferring out here... cheaper tuition or not, it was just a little too convenient, and Wade is notorious for spoiling Laura. He's almost certain he's covering her tuition from his personal money. especially when it came up that she was quitting her part-time work so she could concentrate on her studies.

also, Logan remembered the Dossier labeled Bayer CropScience LP. He'd read the news paper clipping in it that that talked about the USDA Moving sections of the department to Kansas City including key research labs, there was another company named Cerner on Wade's list of targets of concern... it was Wade's personal project and not tied to their professional joint partnership MFM L.L.C. he knew the details, though.

at some point, GMO foods would be developed that were capable of canceling the X Gene. Striping those with gifts and preventing any new ones from being born. It's why the grocery bill was always through the roof and why he could never dare drink a Coke, not the kind with corn syrup anyway. His immortality was tied to this universe... regardless, his claws and sense of smell weren't tied to that. There was a chance that those could be affected. 

" Logan... penut!? Baby girl? Sweetheart!"

Logan shook his head. he was kind of just frozen there in the living room in a full reverie for a minute.

"Are you ok babe? I think you were having an exposition flashback"

It's a nice house Wade, he'd been pissed for about a week now. He had taken Vanessa advice and seen a therapist. 

He didn't get much from it other than it was ok to be mad, it was okay to be in the moment. But at some point you had to make an effort to let go. He'd let go of the little shit... the deepest darkest part of him was firmly entrenched after 200 years, that wouldn't let him go.

He'd extend the olive branch. "Wade, home is wherever you are, you're my favorite agent of chaos. We'll live here. But please promise me you won't spend a million dollars of our money without at least running it by me... Wade, who hadn't apologized yet for buying the place, looked at Logan. "I'm sorry that l impulse bought a house, if its any consolation, my spleen still hurts from that punch." Logan knew that for Wade, that was as sincere as it got. And he knew he felt bad mostly because Logan hadn't been groped since that night. Wade punished himself. Sigh... ok, bub, come here. Logan took Wade in his arms "fights done, I'm letting it go... I'm sorry about your spleen. " You're right. I was irresponsible... "shhh, we're letting it go." Wade slid his hands down the back of Logans, jeans...

Logan, in a forgiving mood, just let him have a hand full of the cake as the kids say and kissed him, he kinda missed it.

It smells like some gay shits going on in here! I assume you two animals kissed and made up finally.

"Yes Althea, we're fine, and you know technically we're not gay."

Good! I'm glad you're better. But I don't know what else to call two married men who sleep with each other. But if we're getting technical the way you two fuck is called domestic assault and battery and a violationof several sections of the Geneva convention. One of the many reasons we didn't get our deposit back is all the blood in the carpets. Please tell me my room is on the opposite side of the house as yours and please try not to bleed all over this house too.

You get your pick of rooms Al there's two on the opposite side of the house from ours.

Thank you she said as she walked towards them, holding the Dogpool MaryPuppens.

one of you two mother fuckers want to take this dog and help me to the rooms so I can pick one, if I trip over a box i'm setting something on fire! I'm already pissed off.

Do you know this fucking building isn't ADA compliant. I hope you have enough money left over for a lawyer because it took me forever to find the fucking elevator and none of the doors are marked, I had to ask a random lady for help, and none of the cocain in this fucking city is any good it's all 99% fint and I aint trying to die Wade Wilson.

"Al remember you're getting older we switched you to the devils lettuce, its legal here and better for your heart" 

Well fucking roll one up I had to use ecco location and schlep up 18 stories and I'm so mad I could spit... 

Al, Wade, I'm going to go downstairs and get more boxes (the more sensitive items they had hauled themselves, not wanting the moving company to deal with it).

"Grab the guns they should be in the box Marked sex toys" 

Logan stopped Wade!? Where are the sex toys then?... " In the box marked silverware or guns... but I can't remember" in Unison Al and Logan "For fuck sake." Logan walked out the door. 

He pulled out a cigar lit, it and walked to the elevator around the corner. He smacked right in to a lady coming the other way... Jesus ma'am I'm sorry. He helped her to her feet. 

Goodness that felt like hitting a brick wall. Have you seen an elderly African American woman? she was very distraught. 

Yes she's my friend. Family really we're just moving in, she inside the house.

Oh good, I was worried... and you are?

Logan Howlett. I just got in today for the move.

Ah yes I met Mr. Wilson earlier when he set up the moving in schedule so the freight elevator would be free. I'm Meranda Van Hammet, I'm on the HOA board I wanted to make sure you were settled in and give you the bylaws hand book. 

Bylaws? I don't think we're painting the outside of the condos, putting the trash on the curb or mowing the grass.

Very funny, Mr. Howlett, but there's other things. This is a tower after all, and we're all a little close to each other, though most have excellent soundproofing. For one thing, you need to make sure your dog uses the proper section of the lawn. it's clearly marked.... 

Okay. 

Here would you please sign this saying you received your hand book and may I ask what relation you are to Mr. Wilson

Wade!? He's my husband.

Oh! Well, all right then, thank you. Here's your book... and if you check on page six, Mr Howlett you will see it says no smoking in the common hallways. Ta ta!

Logan did not like the way she said "Oh!"

Also he could smell the revulsion she had. In the year 2027, people are still like that. Bad enough dealing with the Mutant haters, he had classic bigots that hated him based on whom he loved and made love to. He had a feeling he wasn't going to like her, and not just because she was a bigot, he knew an HOA Karen when he saw one.

He'd deal with that later. He went down grabbed the box full of handguns and continued to unpack things in to the house.

Finally all the shit was in the house after a few hours and the new furniture had arrived too.

It was an indulgence Logan had allowed out of necessity, especially since he had no intention of bringing the uncomfortable, barley functioning blood-soaked couch with them. However, Wade went a little nuts. Logan was canceling whatever app had HGTV on it that was for certain. It's not that he ordered anything bad. Quite the opposite It was well appointed and beautiful, dark mahogany and burgundy throughout.

it costs as much as a starter home in this town to furnish the whole condo. To his credit, Wade paid for half of it from his personal funds and talked to logan about it, and he picked up the other half. The truth is they actually were doing well, they could afford it... but all of it felt like showing off, a little too ostentatious, it made Logan uncomfortable. Althea was right about one thing. Any "blood sports/war crimes" the two of them got up to will probably have to be contained to the very nice shower that was big enough for the two of them with multiple showr heads in their master suite. It was too nice to ruin this place... mattresses were replaceable, though he thought as he smirked.

It was getting late, they had gotten everything unpacked that they were going to for one day. Logan had finished unloading all the pots and pans on the hanging rack. Wade was in front of the window again. it was dark outside, but downtown sparkled in the distance.

We should go to bed, bub. Wade didn't move or answer. Logan walked over to him. Are you ok, babe? I promise I'm not mad anymore. Let's go to bed.

Logan slipped amorous intent into his tone with his last sentence to sweeten the deal. Wade turned. He was clearly upset. Logan reached out and grabbed his hand.

Something.... Something is wrong with the plot. I think the story is going to get dark at some point.

Wade said stuff like this from time to time. Most people wrote it off. He'd speak to no one and make strange references. He's just crazy he heard Warhead say once. But being bound to him and close to him, Logan had caught on that occasionally he was saying something important. Something that ended up happening. He wondered if this was a latent mutant ability. Some random precognition that came and went.

He hugged Wade to comfort him. It's ok, bub. Whatever it is, we will deal with it together. He felt Wade's tensing loosen. Let's go to bed.

Ok, that sounds good... but I'll have you know I get very horny when I'm upset.

Logan chuckles... I'll see if I can't do anything about that.

Link to Scene 2

Deadpool & Wolverine: Knights of Kansas City

Scene/vignette 2

mid-march 2027, Kansas city Earth-10005

Malfeasance and Fraud Mitigation LLC

Logan walked into the shared office of the condo. It was the room just behind Altheas' room. Peter had emailed him several job prospects he needed to go over. The office was split in two, not the way the old bedroom was, but merely clearly demarcated by decor. On one side was Logans desk fairly neat and minimalistic. Laptop, ash tray, humador, and a silver framed picture... meanwhile, on the other side of the room is a desk littered with funco pops, tchotchkes, and assorted crap. Mounted behind it on the wall Wade's favorite guns, the home arsenal, as well as two crossed adamantium katanas. His golden girls. Behind Logans desk framed was a mask and yellow pants.

He'd officially retired that suit what was left of it anyway. Though he smiled wickedly to himself thinking about the last time he wore that mask, that was a good nigh. He was no longer an X-men and finally free of the guilt that kept that suit on him. He'd fulfilled his penance and was able to take it off. Logan wasn't sentimental but wade was right when he told him he should keep it. It was an important part of who he was and the only thing he had from his universe.

He may not be an official X-man but he would drop everything and answer the call of the X-men or mutant kind if they needed him. Not that he wasn't interested in being an Asset to the X organization... the problem is his partner, Wade didn't play well with the kind of business the X-men delt in. He told this universe's scott to not hesitate to call. It tore him up to even speak to him though... he looked just like his scott, the one he let down. He didn't linger on that thought. It's unhealthy.

He told them that he and his partner, his husband, had to forge their own path and paraphrase himself. What we do best isn't very nice. 

Wade and himself had worked their way up from digging for freelance jobs on the dark web to now having clients seek them out. They worked hard, saved, and brought their family who were interested with them into their success.

Malfeasance and fraud mitigation was the name on the paperwork For logan and wade's company "the Family business". As far as the IRS was concerned They were private investigation firm. With a focus on fraud. Obviously. Logan knew the joke and so did thier clients that had half a brain. MFM stood for Mercs for Money.

They did investigations, and Logan legitimately could do detective work. But their bread and butter their raison d'être was being two of the best hitmen, mercenaries, and assassins... the most dangerous and, when necessary, discreet hired guns (and claws) on the market.

The official paperwork stated the company had 4 full-time employees 

Partner and Lead investigator Lawrence Donald Patch aka Logan Howlett 

Partner co investigator & chief of security David Body Aka Wade Wilson 

Associate Head administrative assistant Peter Wisdom... Peter didn't quite get the whole alias thing. But it was ok for his position he had plausible deniability, should it go tits up, and would get in the least amount of trouble.

Associate chief intelligence analysis and accountant Alpharetta Noble aka Althea Winifred Sanderson aka Blind Al

The business probably wouldn't work without Althea, as she had done in the past she was in charge of financials. She was an artist when it came to money laundering.

She shifted payments between a baffling number of shell corporations and actual front business. By the time the money hit everyones accounts, it was clean and, most importantly, taxes paid, and they never cut corners on paying taxes. As long as Uncle Sam got his fair cut, they never had any issues.

Peter was the front facing member of the company. Perfect for him because he had a Midwestern dad (who was secretly a freak) charm about him that people found disarming. He fielded clients, made appointments, reservations and travel arrangements. All things he could have done in new york remotely. But he followed them out to the Heartland. He'd already bought a chiefs shirt and a BBQ smoker and was working on his brisket technique.

Peter lives at the safe house north of the river in the suburb of Liberty. 

A fixer upper they got for a bargain.

(The word fixer upper being a word that excited Wade. Seriously, he was addicted to that show)

However the house being in need of a massive renovation worked because they needed to build and hide a reinforced concrete arsenal room with foot and a half thick walls. Wade did look cute in those hot pink slutty short shorts and a hard hat as he slung a sledgehammer. He insisted on participating in "demo day"

Logan agreed to all this despite the 400k total price tag because it wasn't safe to keep some of Wade's more exotic toys. The big boy booms at the condo.

it was one thing to endanger themselves but quite another to to accidentally blow up the top four floors of One Park Place. He was also happy that Wade had learned his lesson about impulse buying houses... Logan blamed HGTV %100 at this point. But call it being neighborly to spend the money to keep the neighbors safe from catastrophic explosions... unless it was Meranda Van Hammet Logan wouldn't mind her getting blown up... just a little.

Logan, was sitting at the desk, smoking a cigar. A Fuente Fuente Opus X Lost City. Wade had turned him on to the brand year's ago. He always kept some of those, Oliva Serie V Melanio Maduro, and some Buffalo trace cigars in the humador on his desk.

He'd run through the jobs Peter had sent him. He settled on a mob hit. Client wanted it to look clean and like an accident, contracting it out to MFM to put as much distance between them and the hit as possible so any blowback didn't come back on them.

Intel said the target was a social drinker, had his favorite haunts. It'd be easy for Logan to instigate a fight, and perhaps that fight goes wrong... accidents happen. Logan would have to spend a few days in eastern Europe doing a little recon, making sure he was the right guy and finishing the job. It was straight forward enough that it was a solo job, Wade could stay home.

They had rules about backup and making sure one could extract the other from hostal situation should things go fucking sideways.

Also, sometimes it was just nice to have company on a mission, especially when that company could help with "stress relief."

After taxes, paying into the shared account, and paying out Al and Peter their cut for services rendered, it'd be a one hundred thousand dollar payout. Well worth the trouble.

He was about to message Wade with the details and Inform Peter that he needed to make arrangements. when Althea walk in the office.

*smells cigar smoke* Logan, do you mind if I sit in the office with you.

Not at all, Althea. She walked in with a comically large bong and headed for one of the club chairs that was against the wall centered in the room. They were flanking one of those globes that was a bar when you opened it up. She loaded it up and took a heroic hit that'd impress snoop dog.

Althea was never a pest when Logan was in the office with her. Wade on the other hand is why they had machine washable rugs on top of sealed grey granite floors... easy clean up for when Logan inevitably stabed him. More importantly this was the only room you could smoke in, in the house.

There was no balcony, or fire escape like the old place and of course there was no smoking in the common Hall ways. Within the the condo proper according to the bylaws they could remodel the house in any way they pleased. They'd went through the process of making this room in to an office with an advanced, whisper quiet vent and filter system.

You couldn't hot box that room if you filled it with 20 stoners and an unlimited supply. The instalation of said system was held up by the HOA for days. In order to vent it properly, they had to run it through the roof, interfering with literally no one. But because that was common property, it passed through it required approval.

Maranda made sure to slow walk and roadblock approval for the project. She went out of her way to make trouble for them any time she could. Can't have the Queers on the penthouse level having it too easy. She was a fucking menace. Wade finally bribed the board president to just fucking ram it through. Money talks and Marandas bullshit walked that day.

Fuck Maranda! was a common refrain around the house.

Logan finished his message to Wade and stubbed his cigar. Althea, I've got a job. I'm going to take the dogs for a walk and head for the downtown (Wheeler) airport, (no time to fuck around with a commercial flight out of KCI). Peter should have chartered a flight for me by then. Would you feed the dog, I'm not sure when Wade will make it back tonight.

Althea agreed, Logan left, and he and the dog headed to the adjacent park. The building was connected to Penn Valley Park as well as Liberty Memorial. the national world war one memorial and museum. It was actually quite the walk to get to the memorial... but not if you were an ex-New Yorker who walked everywhere and a dog that had surprising amounts of energy for her size. He'd wanted to go with Wade to see the museum at some point in the future.

He was trying to exercise some of his deamons. That was one of them. He was in the trenches at the Second Battle of Ypres. He witnessed good honorable men fed in to the meat grinder. Knee deep in mud and shit. The worst day was 24 April, 1915 when 3,058 casualties were suffered during infantry attacks, artillery bombardments and gas discharges. One hundred and eleven years later he could still smell it, even the Wolverine could only stand up against an entire army for so long at a time.

He choked on gas, his lungs bled he was blown up and shot multiple times without the benefits of adamantium coated bones. You couldn't keep him down but with enough force you could pause him while he recovered.

He'd hoped confronting some of his darkest day's with Wade, that Wade would gain some insight into him, and he could let some of it go. Walking Marry Puppens around the memorial he did realize he'd come to like the city. Significantly more trees, parks and open spaces. This brought him comfort.

He didn't actually like big cities like New York. He was there in the first place out of circumstance... it's where Wade brought him. But also New York was where the action was. He didn't miss it. the only thing he missed were the people that hadn't or couldn't make the move with them. He and Wade had actually planned on footing the bill to get them all out there for the fourth of July. Apparently, their house had an excellent view of the fireworks display put on by the memorial every year.

It'd be nice. Unlike what he was getting ready to fly out of town to do for money.

*** Bonus the Silver framed picture***

One of the few things to adorne Logans desk is a photo of his and Wade's reception.

Logan dosn't know who put it in his head. Perhaps himself. But a month or two following that spontaneous new years eve wedding Wade got it in his head they needed to have a real reception. He wanted pictures... he wanted Logan in a tuxedo. He didn't begrudge wade this request. Having memories of them with thier friends and family. Pictures... some day that'd be all that was left. Memories.

Logan looked at the picture on his desk remembering that night.

Logan was wearing a white Tuxido, cut a little tight on the hips, it was a rental but he looked nice regardless 

Wade picked the Song for the first dance. It was a surprise... everyone had specific instructions to make sure Logans was facing the wall until the appropriate time.

so was what happened next the DJ cued in some intro music... "These Dreams" by Heart. Logan was allowed to turn around 

Wade walking in from across the room... was Wade in a Scarlett Talbot Runhof Metallic Ruched Off-The-Shoulder Tulle Cape Gown and wearing his mask. Walking just fast enough that the cape fluttered behind him. 

Logan laughed the hardest he had in decades. Wade finally got up to him. "You don't like it penut?" No, I love it. You look beautiful he said, wiping tears from his eye. I was just surprised. Wade blushed under the mask.

Ready to dance, big guy? 

Wade prone to "interesting" tast in music Picked Katy perry's Teenage Dream.

He's certain everyone else thought it was silly. But Logan actually listened to the lyrics and caught the subtle message this clever Red Devil was sending him.

🎵You think I'm pretty without any makeup on

🎵You think I'm funny when I tell the punch line wrong🎵

🎵Before you met me I was alright, but things were kinda heavy You brought me to life🎵

🎵I finally found you, my missing puzzle piece

I'm complete🎵

🎵You and I, will be young forever🎵

Clever Red, very clever 

Frozen in time is that moment, Wade's cape fluttering around them as Logan danced with his "controversially younger husband." Wade had been on a kick referring to himself as such that month.

It was one of the many happy moments he'd been acquiring to shut out the dark ones.

Link to Scene 3

Deadpool & Wolverine: Knights of Kansas City

Scene/vignette 3

mid-march 2027 Kansas City Missouri, Earth-10005

Hard pour corn!

Wade had been making quick work since he'd gotten settled in the city taking care of the "racist fucking corn plot" he'd made his lifes mission to destroy. He'd admit to nothing about the whole move being a Contrivance to get the whole crew to the city to take care of it. He might admit in limited company that when he and Laura were talking one day the subject of her wanting to transfer to a school, preferably somewhere she wasn't having to work part time just to eat...

Wade may have suggested that the middle of the country is a lot cheaper. He may have mentioned that he heard UMKC was a prestigious school... he may have told her he'd foot the bill if she decided to do something like that... but it was all Merely suggestions. It was ultimately her decision, whatever she thought was right.

The mission was definitely getting close to its end. Making great time, he figured it'd be April.

Cerner turned out to be a dead end. After contracting Yukio to hack their computers, it revealed little to nothing. Several days of prep. Infiltrating the campus and doing a little social engineering, they had complete access to their computers, and any connection was tangential at best. Time wasted. He moved on to the next promising target.

He'd been surprisingly quite when he infiltrated the USDA labs and offices. No reason to upset the United States government too much, especially if you could do the job covertly. The good news is he discovered that Project X-termination, as it was called, wasn't directly funded or resurched by the US. However, contractors and labs and project proposals revealed work that was derived from the project. With that information, he finally found who he thought was at the top of this conspiracy.

Dr. Harland Ray. Unfortunately he'd not turned up any pictures just a current employer. Bayer CropScience, a place he'd already zeroed in on as a target as there was evidence of the development of the evil fucking corn coming from that place.

Before he'd left, unfortunately, even benign derivative work could lead back to the dangerous original project. Wade uploaded a virus into the computer mainframe. Yukio had made it for him, it completely wiped all related information and resurch on the computers. There was thankfully little in the way of hard copy resurch. Just what was being worked on in the lab. He grabbed the notebooks, turned the incubators too high, and turned off the climate control. Killing any active resurch. He left and set the rest on fire in a trash can.

That Friday night, Logan was still out of town. But he'd decided to break protocols. Sure, it was a dangerous mission into the heart of a project dead set on destroying all mutants. But his research showed security was lax, and importantly, he didn't think they saw him coming. More importantly, he was Hell bound to change the plot. Logan, the one native to this universe, was in place in Mexico. In two years, he'd find and rescue Laura and get her to safety. The movie would end with the same tragedy. Charles and Logan would both be dead. But mutants would still be around. No fucking corn or GMO would fuck up his people. Wade was going to be the hero and erase that entire section of the time line. He'd already made progress. He'd destroyed and set back several satellite labs and projects linked to it. They were already years behind schedule implementing it. A little off the books help from Peter's girlfriend and Yukio's time line monitoring scifi do hickey showed that much progress.

He'd asked Laura to come to the house. Althea was Busy with work since Logan was on a mission and someone needed to care for the dog. Also he just wanted to see her later, what's the point in a guest room if you can't have guest, also hed asked her to pick up her dad from the airport when he got home Saturday afternoon.

On his way downstairs, he shoved an envelope with about 50 grand under neighbor Dave's door; unmarked non sequential and not a single fingerprint on anything... It really is a shame about his car.

~later that night~

A green corvette convertible with it's top down drifts at high speed off E Gardner Rd on to Chemagro Rd Wade in his black on black stealth outfit. He has locked in the cruse control and aimed the car at the guard shack of Bayer CropScience's massive factory and lab campus. He climbs up from the drivers seat, he looks almost as if he's surfing on the car. With a cat-like grace, he does a backflip off the car and sticks the landing. A few moments later, an explosion splits the quiet night as the car crashes through the guard shack

Wade makes a B line across railroad tracks heading for the fence in the darkness surrounding large industrial looking buildings. That explosion should provide enough of a distraction for him to cut the fence and infiltrate the building holding his target. Intel said there was an underground lab. He'd finally found it a few minutes later. It wasn't hidden. It was just in the basement. Gettin in was easy. It was night and dead. He hadn't seen anyone since he got inside. And went downstairs to one of the labs. Hopefully, the crash had all the guards out. He made it to one of the lab computers. Turned it on

Password required.

Wade started typing on the keyboard.

Im in!

He said as he plugs in a USB stick.

Youkio had engineered not only the virus but the USB stick itself. All wade had to do was plug it in and press the button on its side. Plug and play, no skills on his end necessary. It brut forced the lock screen in seconds and automatically started downloading its program.

This one was the nuclear option. It wasn't like the one he used that the USDA crafted to only delete targeted items. This program would not only delete everything related to the development of project X-termination but would Maliciously destroy everything.

Good, fuck this place.

The virus would caus catastrophic failures if the HVAC was linked to the system it'd turn on the heat in server rooms, caus cooling fans to turn off and overclock CPUs. If we're lucky, several computers would catch fire throughout the facility. It'd also disable most if not all security programs, especially if they upgraded to wireless cameras like his intel said.

Standing at the computer, he watched the progress bar on the screen. 98... 99... 100% virus uploaded. It was already working. Time to plant the charges an extra special blend of high explosives in small containers. this whole building would go up in a ball of flames. Leave nothing behind.

*FIP!*

that sounded like a tranquilizer dart....

Wade felt his right ear. right through his ear lobe like a piercing was a needle that had already sunk into the meat just behind his jaw on his neck. He grabbed it by the part that had contained the tranquilizer chemicals and ripped it out.

Is this lab sponsored by Claire's because that's the worst ear piercing I've ever had.

*FIP!* *FIP!* *FIP!* *FIP!* *FIP!* *FIP!* *FIP!**FIP!* *FIP!* *FIP!*

Now Wade felt woozy... the room starts to Blurr oh... oh no, I've fucked up.

His last thoughts before blacking out.

Im so fucking stupid...

Laura, Logan... I love you.

Wade woke up naked and restrained to a table. Don't get a boner Wade. Now is not the time. He flexed against the bonds, whatever material they were made of they were capable of resisting him, he could easily lift 800 lbs sometimes more. He and Logan sometimes delitighted in tossing each other around during "fun times." Damn it, don't get a boner right now. If I work at it, i might be able to tear my hands off and get out of this.

Ah, I see you're awake. Do you know how much mutant inhibitor and drugs I loaded you up with?

A bald portly man walks in the room.

I'm Dr. Harland Ray. Assuming from the labels on your clothes, you must be Deadpool. The red piece of shit that's been blowing up all my resurch labs and apparently just completely fucked every computer at this facility.

Jesus's I finally confront the mastermind of project X-termination, and he looks like Big chungus Elmer fudd!

Now that kind of talk won't get you anywhere Mr. Pool It looks like I've finally caught the glitch in my system. Do you know how many years you've set me back.

Clearly, not far enough, you genocidal monster. Wade makes his best effort to spit at the man.

That's a wild accusation coming from a mutant. Considering you fucking people are a menace. Setting fires just by thinking about it, destroying city blocks causing massive damage and often because of you're own petty internal disagreements. I remember as a child watching as one of you miscreants dropped a stadium on Washington DC

Oh, X-men Days of future past. That's one of my favorites. Especially at minute marker 18:00. Watch it now on Disney+ kid's. You'll thank me later.

What are you ramblings about? Never mind its not important. What is fascinating is I Vivisected you, harvested your organs, and when I left, you were most certainly dead. Of course, I had to take paper notes. Thanks to you. Once we get our IT problem solved, I'm sure i can pick up where I left off or perhaps something better. You're a promising specimen. I could develop all kinds of interesting things using your biological information. Though again, I must emphasize I'm surprised we're even having this conversation

I gave you a massive amount of mutation inhibitor drugs. You should be dead.

Oh I think you'll find I'm very durable, you fat fucking Dr. Mengele.

Indeed, which is why I'm going to cut you open again this time while you're awake. Im a scientist. Let's see if changing the parameters brings different results.

As for your continued accusations of Genocide, no one actually would have died with my plan. You freaks are just cured of your condition. Free to live your lives. Mundane lives like the fucking rest of us. People will die as a result some people's gifts are whats keeping them alive. Collateral damage is minimal according to my calculations, if some people die. Well, we all have our demons, Mr. Pool.

hopefully, my Demon finds me soon, Wade thought to himself.

Dr. Ray jamed a scalpel into Wade's clavicle and started making a Y incision. He wouldn't give the bastard the satisfaction of his screaming. But he prayed he'd black out soon.

Link to scene 4

Deadpool & Wolverine: Knights of Kansas City

Scene/Vignette 4

Sliven Bulgaria 2027 Earth-10005

Of Hit-jobs and Husbands.

The siren call of violence. It always called to him, making a career of it made sense.

He preferred being a lumberjack or those short months in New York when he did construction and freelance manual labor. But that doesn't pay the bills. Perhaps in a few thousand years, there won't be a need for people like Wade and himself. They could weave baskets or run a B&B of some sort, perhaps log cabin outside of Banff Alberta, cater to the park tourists. they could both enjoy a quiet, peaceful existence. At least for a while. The daydreams of the Wolverine as he sat on the large plush leather couch in the chartered private jet headed to Bulgaria for "Work."

He pulled out his bag, he packed lightly, and quickly, but he definitely needed something less flashy than what he had on for this mission...

Once upon a time in Central Park, Wade had vented all the frustrations he had with him

One of them being that he had bad taste.

Ever since they got more successful, Wade made a point of proving it. 99% of Logans current wardrobe is something Wade picked up. None of it cheap. Logan spent most days looking like a model for Fendi and Prada.

Wade had two major modes of affection for Logan. One : Universal. he bought people gifts, he spoiled the one he loves, especially now when he had more money. The other was specifically reserved for logan. The man could not keep his hands off him, Logans ass had been smacked more than an actress in a tela novela. Some days, he liked it, especially on the days when Logans feral needs rose to the surface.

He remembered a few days ago

Wade had gone for the goods as he walked by him in the living room.

THAT'S IT! Wade flinched for the soon to come stabing. Instead, Logan Sweeped him off his feet and started walking with him in his arms towards their room. Don't start things you can't finish, bub! Wade cackled like a school girl all the way to the room... on the other side of the house, you could hear Althea turning up the volume of the TV in her room up.

Logan opened the bag and shifted through its contents, looking for something to change into, something less conspicuous.

The casual pants he was wearing that moment were dolce and gabbana and the black t-shirt he was wearing was from Prada. Observant people would notice the man in two grand worth of clothing walking in to a dive bar in downtown Sliven

He pulled out a pair of no name jeans from the thrift store and a basic dark green polo shirt. Changed and laid down on the couch.

It was a long flight, he pulled out one more thing from his bag. A Yellow and Pink t-shirt with an animé character on it... it still smelled strongly of Wade. Logan hugged it tight to his chest, rolled over and did his best to sleep.

After tracking down the target, it was an easy job. He didn't actually have to waste a day doing a lot of recon.

He found him sitting at the bar. He was the typical Eastern european mobster apart from being six foot six and pretty berley he looked like he came straight out of a casting call for a John Wick movie.

Tattoos, gold chains.

Logan wanted to get this over with. He couldn't just stab him and walk out. It had to look like a random event. No way to interpret it as a hit. He had a plan.

He sat next to the guy, chatting him up in his best broken Bulgarian (not a language he was very familiar with) peppering it with English. At some point, he cut to the chaise and asked the mobster if he'd like to come home with him. For emphasis, logan put his hand on his thigh. He took the bait, typical homophobic tough guy started throwing punches.

He let him get a few in. He feigned, taking it hard and falling into a table behind him. He intentionally threw a chair at a table with other rough looking customers. In a matter of seconds, a chaotic bar brawl broke out.

Once everyone was fighting Logan stopped pulling his punches. He gave the mobster a hard jab to his Solar plexus knocking the air out of him. Then starting low he hit him with a precision uppercut. The strike was so hard he flew straight up in the air, by at least a foot. The impact caused his skull to snap back and dislocate from the first vertebrae.

An internal decapitation. He was dead before he hit the floor. Logan gave him a kick. You should have taken me up on the date, bub. He pulled out his phone quickly, took a picture to collect on payment for the hit, and then made his way out the back door as the chaos rose to a crescendo.

Police sirens were in the distance. It was time to get gone. He'd made it back to the non descript roach motel he'd been staying in while doing recon from. Sent an encrypted email to Peter with the photo.

He'd invoice the customer and get him on the earliest flight out of the country. Logan caught a cab and went to the airport at the edge of town. He told peter he'd take anything he could arrange even a short trip it Istanbul while he arranged something directly to Kansas City. It was more important that he put distance between him and the Sliven's Police department. He really didn't want a complicated extraction.

Thankfully, it wasn't long. He cought a Sesna to Sofia where a Gulfstream G550 was waiting. With a full tank, Kansas City was well within range for a nonstop flight.

This flight came with an attendant who took his bag and handed him a glass of champagne. Something special from Peter? He didn't normally book flights with a lot of extras... but it was short notice. Perhaps an attendant and drinks came standard.

She had made eyes at him during the flight but Logan felt empty, killing and running takes it out of you. This was technically a business trip... and it was unprofessional.

But then she made a big show of dropping a pin and bent over right in front of Logan. Revealing under her very short skirt, a pair of frilly red and black panties with Wade's logo on it making a winky face at him.

Wade, you dog... a home coming present? Though Logan was a little suspicious. He'd never done anything like this before. The little shit probably set the condo on fire or something.

Ever the gentleman Logan asked if the attendant was interested in a little in flight entertainment. Because consent is important. She agreed, and Logan dropped her panties and buried his face in Her ass. The smell and taste had him immediately hard. It'd been a while since he'd been with a woman, but he was relatively certain he'd remember how it went as he kicked off his pants and opened the condom she handed him...

After about an hour and a half of his induction into the mile high club he was spent, she got hers too. it didn't matter if she was just doing a job. For Logan, everyone lucky enough to get in his pants got to reach climax before he did, because nothing turned him on more than a job well done.

They both got dressed. It wasn't the biggest plane, so he changed into a new outfit in front of her... black Armani underwear ( Wade's favorite, he loved seeing Logan strut around in only a pair of those. He was staring to think Wade had a thing for certain clothes... recently, Wade had a custom circus ring master costume complete with top hat made that fit Logan very snugly. They hadn't gotten a chance to play with it yet, but Wade said it was going to be the greatest show.

He slipped in to his Valentino Garavani Men's Rockstud Faded Jeans and a plain white versace shirt, he hated the little rivets in the pants and wouldn't have worn them had he not just grabbed shit out of the closet. The shirt was more his speed it was white and only had a small Medusa head on the breast.

They had a long flight, so Logan made small talk with her. He also did his due diligence. Her name was Veronica, and yes, she was completely ethical. She was based out of Amsterdam, in business for herself, and was happy with her occupation and did not currently need rescuing.

Today was actually a bonus for her. She didn't find all of her clients attractive. Logan blushed a little at the compliment.

You're probably a gift from my husband. Judging by the underwear you came with. He's probably done something stupid.

She cocked an eyebrow at the husband line

I'm Bisexual. She smiled and immediately understood.

your husband clearly doesn't mind you being with other people if I was a gift.

He's the love of my life. But life... is a long time, sex isn't something we get jealous about, as long as I come home.

They spoke about her life as much as she was comfortable telling. He told her what he tells the IRS. He's a private investigator and he was in Bulgaria following up on a lead. He'd asked her if she'd be ok with him taking a nap. She was fine, she'd just sit and look at her phone. Logans pulled out the animé shirt. Veronica again looked at him puzzled

It helps me sleep.

He gave the shirt a light inhale, hugged it to his chest and took a nap. They'd be in Kansas city soon.

Logan bid farewell to Veronica and thanked her again for a nice time. He grabbed his bag and headed out

When Laura sans Wade met him at the airport he knew something was afoot

Where is your dad?

I'm not certain. He said he'd be home by the morning. I called Warhead and Peter.

By the time Laura got home they had heard back from Yukio and Warhead. Thankfully a fucking clue. Youkio was able to ping it when her virus was activated. Wade had infiltrated The Bayer campus. But hadn't made it out. Warhead had confirmed that he contracted her for intel and recon. As far as she knew the risk was minimal. But something went wrong. Logan went to the bedroom, opened the closet, and pulled out one of the Brown and Yellow suits Wade had commissioned for him. Put it on and called Laura and Althea to the living room.

Laura, listen carefully, if I don't come back, don't come after us... all I've ever wanted was to give you a normal life, a life that was robbed from you. You're going to drive me out to that factory. Drop me off, and I'm going to try and rescue your dad. If we don't come back... Althea will initiate the liquidation protocol, sell all the assets, and empty out the corporate accounts.

There's enough for everyone in the family to have a couple million. Laura take that money, takes Al and the dog, and live comfortably and under the radar. Your dad and I can't die, we will escape... but it might be years.

I love both of you. it's s been my greatest joy to call you and Althea my family.

Link to scene 5

Deadpool & Wolverine: Knights of Kansas

CityScene/Vignette 5

Saturday evening, Kansas City Missouri Earth-10005.

Hard Pour Corn 2: I need an aspirin.

Wade woke up from the Cryo chamber, his vision blurred, a red-faced yellow suited man stood before him. You awake, bub, we gotta go. I think I'm coming too. Logan pulled him out of the coffen like container and kissed him. And with equal strength smacked him across the face. WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING. I knew if shit went tits up you'd find me. His vision cleared he saw bodies littered around the floor.

It was for the greater good.

GO FUCK YOURSELF WITH THAT NONSENSE BUB! YOU ARE MY *GREATER GOOD* he Sneered

More like greater chaotic neutral if we're being honest...I need my suit, we need to plant the charges.

WE'LL FIND IT BUB, BUT YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT YOU'VE DONE. I MANAGED TO TRACK YOU IN THE NICK OF TIME. IF YOU HADN'T FUCKED THE COMPUTERS THEY'D BE ON AN ACCELERATED TIMELINE. THEY WERE ABOUT TO SHIP YOU OFF TO SOME BLACK SITE. WADE! IT COULD HAVE BEEN YEARS BEFOR I FOUND YOU. Don't you realize what that would have done to me. Done to our family.

You're right. I was dumb, thank god I left my stink everywhere so you could find me.

but right now, we have to focus on destroying this place. This is the epicenter of project X-termination. So i need to find my clothes the charges I had with me and destroy this place. Logan was quick to sniff out his clothes. Fucking rubes had it in the same damn room as him in a box him and all his shit packed up like cargo in the corner of a room. Wades legs were a little wobbly. He hadn't recovered fully from whatever it was they did. He got dressed and attached to the belt were the four explosives large balls painted to look like pokéballs about the same size too. They probably thought they were just toys.

He planted one in this lab set the timer

Logan, sweetheart. We gotta get going help me to the door we got 3 more to set and we gotta get the fuck out of here, these aren't regulation ordnance.

Ok bub, they exited the door to the hall to the ringing sound of safetys being released and guns being cocked... if they had those trank darts they might be fucked.

Mr. Pool i see you brought a friend. I assume hes a deviant too. Dr. Ray said this flanked by about 30 armed guards. I suppose two of you to work with might help me speed up recovering what you've so thoughtlessly destroyed. Though circumstances might dictate that the new projects result be... less kind than the original.

Friend of yours bub?

That's Harland Ray penut. The mastermind of the most annoying plot point in 2017s Logan. Hughe Jackman was robbed of an Oscar for that.

Wade what the fuck are you talking about.

He's the bad guy, baby girl, and he's about to knock us both... Wade had an idea...

He's the one that tried to kill me!

Oh, he tried! He was unsuccessful! But he did hurt me, Logan pointedly not using a pet name. Hurt me pretty bad, Logans eyes narrowed as he turned and stared daggers at Harland Ray. Wade pointed his hand at the man. Single index finger, marking him as the target.

Then, like a wizard casting a spell with an incantation, Wade spoke calmly and mater of factly "that man Vivisected me and tormented me in pursuit of yet another plot to kill all mutants. harvesting my organs and using my DNA while I was still awake.

All the while monologuing like a fucking villain stereotype.

He plans to kill our friends, he'd wipe us all off the planet it he could. Logan he threatened the team. He said he'd be sure to find all my friends and kill them, you, Peter, Althea, Vanessa. Logan... Wade pulled Logans face to his so he could make eye contact... Logan he threatened Laura, our family... his face went hard he turned back to the doctor and again stared at him, memorizing his prey.

The spell worked, Wade could see the foam forming at the corners of Logans mouth. He'd summoned his deamon, the feral rage was about to take over, Wade could swear he saw fangs growing in his gritted teeth. Logan, what are you going to do about it?

He set Wade on the ground gently, faced the armed men *Snikt* he ran his claws over one another and shot sparks at them

There was no humanity left in Logan at that moment as he set upon the group of armed men. they can shoot all the darts and bullets they want. When he went feral like that his healing factor was super charged. He was an unstoppable force.

Go get'em sugar tits! Hopefully, that was  enough for Wade to have time for his legs to thaw out a little more and set the charges. It wasn't enough to kill the bastards that came up with this research. It had to be destroyed utterly. He did take comfort in the fact that right about now the love of his life was quite literally chewing off that evil fucks face. 

Wade made his way around the facility , planted the bombs, and set the timers it was time to go. When he got back to that main hallway, it looked like the set designers for the Doom series of games had really gone crazy with the budget... bones and puddles of viscera. Logan was still wild and seething. Wade carefully approached him. Babygirl, it is time to go. He didn't move, Wade put a hand on his back and got three knives right in the groin. He cut the left nut clean in half.

FUCK PENUT ITS ME!

I PROBABLY DESERVED IT BUT FUCK!

wade vomited in pain and Logan snaped out of it...

Oh shit bub, I'm sorry

Its okay it'll grow back. I'll make you kiss it later. But we got to get the fuck out of here those charges are on timers the concrete was too thick to do remote detonation. They ran up the stairs.

The explosion was... ill timed. The fucking building was in flames and collapsing around them when they had made it to the ground floor. Most of their skin was burned off, they looked like nightmare gouls from a horror movie. They did thier best to make a run for it out the door a cross a field through the trees and woods. They could hear the guards giving chase behind them but they were stopped, by the little blue river it ran right in to the adjacent Missouri river

This is gonna suck

And hurt.

It had rained recently and the river was high. They jumped into the river and were swept out into the current and eventually into the Missouri river. Wade held on to Logan so that he wouldn't sink. Thankfully, he was able to hang on to some floating trash that came by. He was finally able to get them to the shore by a bridge. The current alone would have killed normal men and fast, they were miles away from where they started. They washed and headed up the hill on the north side of the river... in the middle of fucking nowhere. The sign for the road said 291.

They saw lights and walked towards them. Wade had hot weird a car, Logan made a mental note of the location and address so he could send money for the inconvenience anonymously later. They'd abandon the car in the parking lot of Liberty Memorial and walk home mostly heald but looking like hammered dog shit.

When they got to the building who else was coming out of the elevator but Meranda. She'd never seen them in their "work clothes" standing in the lobby two wet disheveled men with large sections of their skin tight clothes burned off. Holding each other up.

Things got a little wild at fetish night

Wade said

Meranda shocked just wordlessly made a quick exit around them and headed for the lobby doors.

Wade... I'm too tired to fight right now. I'm exhausted, I don't care what the universe has to do with it, regenerating that much skin takes it out of me. So let's just go to bed. I'm guessing we can't skip right to make-up sex? Logan grabbed him tossed him in the large bed, got in next to him, grabbed him, and spooned with him. Wade. If I didn't love you so much I'd toss you through that plate glass window and leave you to regenerate over night in the pile of gore you'd form after falling 18 floors to the court yard. oh, Maranda would hate that. Don't fucking tempt me. But I sleep better with you and I love you. I'm livid with you but i love you.

So, not even a little hand stuff? Sorry bub, but being set on fire and worrying about you really took it out of me, so did that hooker on the plane. So I'm not in the mood. Veronica is an escort. Thank you very much. Not a hooker. happy birthday, by the way.

Wade, my birthday is October 12th.

Wait... was it my birthday then?

go to sleep.

~The next morning~

Althea had the local news playing on the large Living room TV... reports of a large industrial accident by the river front. Several buildings at Bayer Crop Science cought fire and collapsed. Investigators are linking it to computer malfunctions.

Wade wakes up, gets dressed, and walks out of the room to the table where Laura is sitting. Logan is in the kitchen cooking

Good morning sweetheart, hope you had a pleasant sleep last night. Yes, the guest bedroom is very comfortable.

Glad to hear he smiles at her.

Hay Babe, can I get some breakfast as well? An egg comes flying across the room, hitting him square in the chest... you're right, Penut. I really should watch my waistline. Just coffee then, please? A croissant flies just past his head.

We'll let the dog have that one.

You'd better not make anymore request dad, the cleaning lady has it hard enough.

Your father is still mad at me for irresponsibly threatening the integrity of the team. It seems like someone doesn't appreciate it when other people go lone wolf! He directed this at Logan.

Logan sets a plate in front of Laura, a full spread breakfast bacon, eggs hash browns, half a grape fruit, and sausages.

Kissed her cheek. Enjoy sweetheart.

Then he walked over to Wade,

He slammed a mug of coffee in front of him. Here's your coffee, I pissed in it.

Jokes on you, Daddy. I'm into that, he says as he takes a sip...

Hey, there's no piss in this!

Wade sat there a little sullen. He finished his coffee. Laura was almost finished with breakfast.

Logan had stomped off to the office, probably to chain smoke cigars and brood

Sweetheart... can daddy have one of those sausages.

Her dad gave her the most pathetic face... she gave him one.

You know, he told me that if you didn't come back to cut and run... to live a normal life with all your money. Sometimes, I think you two forget who I am. I was murdering punks at the age of 12, and I held my own in the void. Don't get me wrong, you are great dad's, and I appreciate everything you've done for me. I love you. But because I love you, know that I would have spent every day hunting you down to get you back, and I would absolutely slaughter anyone that got in my way.

Sweetheart, it's one of the earth's cruel tragedies that I didn't give birth to you myself. You clearly are my daughter, and I love you. I don't know what your plans are for the morning, but I'm going to get a bowl of cereal. Later if you want, we can walk down to Crown Center. I hear they got an aquarium that I've been wanting to check out. But we gotta be back by 3 pm... I've blocked that hour out on my schedule to annoy the shit out of your father. He Grinned.

Laura laughed. That sounds great dad.

Link to scene 6

Deadpool and Wolverine Kights of Kansas City.

Vignette/Scene 6

April to June 2027 Kansas city, Earth-10005

A not so brief interlude

(Multiple scenes)

After extensive analysis with Yukio, she could firmly establish that Project X-termination aka Mutant Suppression had been erased from the time line. No loose end's, Alkali-Transigen, Bayer Crop Science, or the Essex Corporation wouldn't be able to revive the project ever. Wade though an Irresponsible Idiot, was a hero.

Mutant kind would always face hardships, but not this one.

~in the office. April~

Logan was going over contract offers. A wide variety of offers, some of them too messy or complicated.

Wade was in their under the guise of actually helping with work, he looks over his desk at Logan sitting at his across the room.

Anything good?

Not really. I don't like politics or war zones.

Taking out a Russian general, pay is good, source is questionable.

What do you mean? I can't verify if this is a CIA black budget job or if the Russians want to take out one of their own for reasons. Shits complicated over there, I don't want to hurt more than help even for a shit load of money.

We could take up some of these espionage jobs... if you can manage to be quiet.

What, for the right amount of money, I can be quiet, and up until recently, I had a good run with quiet infiltrations.

We'd have to leave for Paris in two days.

Target is in Versailles. KNDS France offices.

You'd better brush up on your French. Bub.

I'd like to start by frenching you.

~May. Knights~

With no other pressing missions, they worked. Most of that work the Violent and bullets ridden world of mercenaries and underworld crime. Enough that they were very comfortable during their time off.

The boys settled in to life in the city

They'd discovered that a bar called Missy Bs was only a 28 minute walk from the condo... in a pretty car centric city like Kansas city people said they were crazy to walk that far. If it was the walk, they were use to that after living in New York, if it was safety people were concerned about... let's just say they wished a mother fucker would.

Missy's had regular drag shows that Wade adored. They were also home to a leather scene that Wade really wished that Logan would get in to, but Logan only let Wade go so far with using him as his dress up doll.

The spiderman outfit was bad enough, and that was only in the bedroom.

Wade, you can dress me in Chanel, Dior, and Versace. I've played well with your shenanigans despite just desperately wanting to just wear jeans and my favorite undershirt. Because I'll admit I do look nice.

But if you think I'm going to dress like a Tom of Finland leather daddy and then go IN PUBLIC! You really are God's perfect Idot.

Wade dejected.... Can I still wear my outfit?

Wade was dressed like a cowboy if they're got stuck in a matrix movie...

You can wear whatever you like, wear a ballgown. It doesn't bother me... I'm saying I'm not putting that on. I'm kinda done with black leather body suits, never liked them.

With that settled they headed out to the bar. Hoping to get a little relaxation after a long week in the field working (murdering)

It didn't always happen, but sometimes they'd even bring a new friend home (for some mattress athletics) on a particularly good night of bar, hoping around Westport and power and light, drinking walking or riding, sharing the night away.

The bar was hoping. Wade was chatting up one of the regulars, talking about their mutual love of trash TV and Trixie Mattel. It was a loud night.

Sitting next to him, Logan was enjoying his whiskey and people watching. It was turning out to be a good night. That was until Logan heard a scream... distant, no one else heard it over the music and crowd.

Wade, we gotta go. Someones in trouble

What do you mean, Penut? Everything seems fine. Logan can make out the word "Help" this time. We're going, bub! Logan tosses a couple hundred on the bar to more than cover their drinks. He didn't want any trouble at one of his favorite haunts. He grabbed Wade and ran out into the darkness. Half a block away men were attacking a woman.

*skit* LEAVE HER ALONE YOU FUCKERS.

they ran towards the group ready to roll, they saw two men one with big fucking knives running towards them. They bailed and ran to a nearby pickup truck. They started it and started their escape.

Wade pulled out his Glock 17 and raised it.

WADE NO! Logan smacked his arm down

She's safe. We'll get them later. We don't need the cops coming because of gun fire...

They walked over to her.

You ok?

Yes. Fucking hicks come in from the plowed dirt lands surrounding this city to fuck with the queers. They ain't got nothing better to do... thanks though, you're my knights in shining armor... I don't think i was getting away with just a beating this time.

My name is Dahlia, please call me Dal.

They made thier introductions and helped her to her feet. She was a short and slight blonde woman. She reasoned they were waiting for someone to leave the bar by themselves. Probably thought she was some fem boy when she walked out... it didn't really matter. They were in town to be assholes. She wouldn't have been by herself had she not been fighting with her girl... an ugly one. She took the damn car. She should have gotten a ride share but thought a walk would clear her head. Then the ambush, leading us to now.

Logan could still smell them. He could probably track them and beat the ever loving shit out of them. He'd enjoy doing it.

Had he let Wade get a shot off, he knew the result would have been worse, Wade wasn't going to disable the truck shooting the tier. Logan saw in slow motion he was lining up a headashot to the driver, Wade dosn't fuck around and he dosn't miss. But you don't shit where you eat and they were very close to thier own damn house and didn't have the time to hide bodies and deal with Dal as a witness. Heart in the right place but not thinking about consequences as usual.

Date nigh was officially over. They'd convinced Dal to come with them. They had a big gust room, and Dal didn't want to go home. She was pissed with Maxine for running out of the bar with the car over petty bullshit. They called a car and took the short ride back to One Park Place together... once on the 18th floor, Dal wasn't quite sure what she expected. But she didn't quite expect what she saw when she walked through the mahogany double doors that went into the condo. A huge living room area, panoramic views of downtown, dark sealed granite floors, blending in with the crimson upholstered furniture accented with dark mahogany...

Pardon my crassness, but what the fuck do you two do for a living?

Mer...

Private investigators Logan cut off Wade before he told the fucking truth.

Business must be good

Oh, you could say we've made a killing... we're good at it.

Thankfully, our business partners, roommates, and book keeper is already in bed, or I'd introduce you to Althea.

Your bookkeeper lives with you in this penthouse?

It's economical, besides she's like family, if you stay for breakfast you'll meet her and our daughter Laura, she likes to stay with us on the weekends, Logan makes a decent breakfast too, it's one of his adorable dad traits.

Thanks for the offer. You guys are awful kind, inviting me in like this. I'm not going to end up in some eyes wide, shut crazy situation here, am I? she says suspiciously, looking around the clearly expensive house.

No, we only do that on Tuesdays, and I think Althea finally found the stash of cocain we were saving for our anniversary.

Jesus... Wade, don't tell people about that.

Sorry Dal, My husband has a bad habit of over sharing. But you are completely safe here. It's probably the safest place in the city.

That door over there is the guest bedroom.

the bathroom has clean towels and soaps and shampoos for guests.

Wade had opened a bottle of whiskey, they handed her a glass. They conversed with each other for about an hour sitting at the counter/bar that faced the functional part of the kitchen. One glass was enough for her but she couldn't help but notice that in the course of the conversation her hosts had finished the entire bottle and barely seemed tipsy, much less the light buzz she was feeling.

Perhaps they're the hard-boiled detective types. Deep in the bottle, trying to solve a kidnapped heiress case... they must solve quite a few, she said to herself glancing around. She finished her drink and was shown to her room. She'd thought she'd seen hotel room suits less impressive. It was beautiful. She showered and tucked herself into the large bed.

~meanwhile in the master suite~

Logang gets out of the shower waking in to the bedroom, just a towel still a little wet.

Wade on the bed, already making eyes at him. Penut I still have some excess adrenaline from earlier running through me.

Wade, we have guests. I can be quiet. The question is, can you be quiet, Mr. Sounds like the MGM lion when he cums.

Besides, you know how I get when I Don't have an opportunity to burn off the manic energy. Logan knew this was code for, fuck me or I'm going to annoy the fuck out of you... ok Wade, but we gotta be quiet.

Nice! One more thing. Please put on your one cowboy hat, and can I be on top tonight. Logan was primarily a top, but any relationship calls for flexibility.

*Sigh* ok bub. You're in luck. He walks over to the closet grabs his hat puts it on and walks back to the bed. He dropped the towel, no sense in drying all the way off. He was going to be sweating soon anyway. He got on top Wade who was laying down, smiling with anticipation. Straddling his hips . Wade ever the considerate lover pulled a tube of lube out from under the pillow, he handed it to Logan who gave him a kiss in return.

Allright cowboy, let's see if you can ride this bull longer than 8 seconds.

Yee-haw daddy.

~Morning~

Dal did stay for breakfast, Logan went all out with a full American Breakfast even pulled out the expensive Maple syrup even. Reminded them both of better times at home in Canada. Laura had gone downstairs to let Mary do her business.

As soon as she got back they'd dig in...

Then Wade got a message on his phone.

[Dad Help, come outside now!]

Dal, Althea. We'll be back. Babe we gotta go downstairs... now.

When they got downstairs two of the buildings security had Laura cornered, she was clearly on her way back inside from the dog walking lawn... Wade had to explain that she wasn't trespassing and infact had been there numerous times. When he looked around he saw the problem. Fucking Maranda was standing over by the dog lawn. She'd definitely gone Full Karen and called security on Laura. As far as he knew they'd been lucky and Luara hadn't had the displeasure of making her acquaintance. Until today, and today Wade wasn't having it.

What the Fuck Meranda!? Why'd you call fucking security. That we pay too much for BTW, I'm bringing that up at the next HOA meeting.

I didn't know she was your friend 

She's my Daughter Maranda!

Meranda said with a shocked and puzzled face. Your Daughter!?

Wade hooks a thumb back pointing at Logan. Yeah, We wanted to have more, hot daddy back there has been shooting thick ropy hot loads of jizz in me for years. Unfortunately, she was the only one that stuck, We tried the other end for a while, but I'm starting to think I'm barren. The problem definitely isn't him, his cum is VIRILE, I'm thinking about IVF

Maranda started gaging, Luara was stifling a laugh and Logans face was beat red

Not that it's any of your business, Maranda, but she's adopted. Which leads me to my important question. Did you call security because of her darker complexion or to fuck with me and Logan because she's clearly walking my very recognizable dog. 

Meranda had nothing to say she just stood there.

In a calm almost chilling tone wade spoke 

Maranda, I've been very tolerant of you and your shenanigans. Which is Ironic since the word fag has been begging to pass your lips every time I see you. I can see it on your face. It's ok, we all know how you feel.

You know, you're not going to be on that board forever, I have more money than you and I promise you I'll live longer than you... since the day we dared to enter your precious community you've been a hindrance and actively fucked with my husband and myself. Fine! whatever! you're free to be a hateful bitch!

But if you so much as cut eyes at my daughter ever again, it might just be the last thing you use your eyes for... and I'll let you in on a secret. I'm the nice one. pray Logan never catches you fucking with Laura again. Because he won't be nice, there probably won't be anything left but a puddle.

With that said, Wade gained a suddenly sunny disposition. I'll see you at the HOA meeting this month,  remember this is the quarterly pot luck dinner meeting, so don't forget to bring a dish

Peanut, honey bee. Grab the dog, and let's go upstairs. Breakfast is getting cold, and the dog needs to be fed.

~June 2027~

Logan and Wade are in their room getting ready for the day.

So, penut. I was thinking for pride this year

if we buy UC Berkeley a new wing and maybe they'll take Laura as a transfer. perhaps we can get us a place in San Francisco. They throw less trash at us when we're holding hands thier...

Wade... The fuck is wrong with you?

You dragged all of us out to this city on a whim, now all of a sudden you want to leave? After we've made friends, bought a house? I'm not fucking going anywhere. Its too late dip shit, I like it here. I've put down roots, ask me again in a hundred years then perhaps I'd consider going back to Alberta, but I'm fucking done with big coastal cities. I told you once they literally stink bub.

A "no" would have sufficed Penut.

Not with you Wade, with you "No" just means fuck with Logan harder while trying to jerk him off in the elevator.

God, I'm getting predictable. Gotta change that. Though part of the excitement is potentially get caught with my hands down your pants...

Yeah, it's always fun to explain why there's blood everywhere, too.

look let's stay here. This community needs our help, "mutants?" "Queers wade! Jesus I thought you were up with the lingo." We're Queers, and it's like you said before, it's almost like this place gets no attention no X-men, no fantastic 4 fuckheads, no superheroes. the closest superheroes are the GLA and their in Detroit "are they in this universe" Logan shakes his head. I don't know, that's not the point. The point is when were not doing Bad shit for money we should be doing something good. I'm not interested in going anywhere for a while.

You dragged me to this city, now i like it. Deal with it. Easy sweetheart, Home is wherever you are, remember. I didn't know you gotten attached, we can run the company from anywhere. We'll stay here. I suppose I can keep a fucking better eye on the corn being in the middle of where the shits made, also if we're staying here we need to do something about Meranda.

I heard her at the last potluck HOA meeting talking shit about my casserole. she's a bitch he said in a comforting tone. I made a point of Inviting her to our pride party, and insisted she go to the parade since we're marching in it "we are?" we are, make sure your suit is clean. "So what'd she say?" Oh she politely but firmly declined, she had another engagement.

M.F.M was one of the largest contributors to pride that year, and many years to follow. They were good and prosperous years, they always had business. Life in Kansas city was good, but remember this city like any other had it's secrets and its problems. Our mercenaries and part time vigilantes who protected those whome the conservative culture surrounding the city would rather just disappear would soon face that head on.

Life is often joy punctuated by tragedy.

Not the end, just another beginning

Our story will continue with

Deadpool & Wolverine: Amber, Crimson, & Noir

A Deadpool & Wolverine: Kights of Kansas City Story

Amber, Crimson, & Noir

Scene 1

Kansas City Missouri, 2029 Earth-10005

Logan was dead to begin with.

The Logan native to this universe. The Loop had been completed, and our hero rested after a long fight. He saved Laura and the others. They escaped, and this time around, he died without the assistance of Alkali-Transigen or Bayer CropScience GMOs. The story for Logan, however, was written in the cosmos. Unfortunately, he was always going to die. He was buried in the wilderness, We all know he didn't rest in peace, but that's another story.

Our story begins on an equally somber night in Kansas city.

Detective Adams was on the scene. Two more bodies. Same m.o. There'd be a rash of killings in the city. The targets tended to be lesbian or transgenderd individuals. A slow burn serial killer was on the loose it'd be weeks and months without, and boom, another body would turn up... they were under specific instructions from city hall not to ring the alarm bell of a serial killer. That shit just didn't happen now a days. Can't have the mayor or the city looking bad, especially since it was still on the rise.

It'd be deemed just another random hate crime.

A well-dressed man walked out of the dark. First, you could see his eyes, glowing like cats and the cherry burning dull orange and red at the end of his cigar.

Leather jacket, designer clothes.

He stopped at the yellow tape.

Looks like you got more trouble, Andre.

It's detective Adams to you, Logan. Might I add that it's suspicious that you'd turn up here.

Hardly, I was on a walk. I live near here. I'll tell you what is suspicious. A body was dumped in Crown Center, and nobody saw a thing, and I bet they fit the same M.O. of the case, I was hired to crack, which has been sitting cold on your desk for months now.

Fuck you Logan, your big city bullshit hasn't really moved the needle since you stuck your nose in it either. Unless you're here to tell me you got a suspect.

No, Wade says hi, by the way.

Great. Has he been terrorizing the neighbors again. You know, one of these days, you're not going to be able to slip out of shit. Pretty boys and their not so pretty husbands don't fair well in Jackson County Jail.

Logan tensed as he tried to keep his claws from popping out reflexively. People making sly comments about Wade's looks were a great way to get his goat. Adams knew that.

I wouldn't call noise violations a Jailable offense.

Yeah, but discharging a firearm is. You fuckers got lucky and have money for lawyers. When you're not sticking your dick in police busses your menace of a partner is causing police incidents. One of these days I'm going to nail his ass to a wall. One of these days you're not gonna be able to slip away...

Why's a private detective who runs a fraud prevention firm got so many guns in their home office anyway?

This is a Red State detective, as I'm so often reminded when the subject of my husband comes up or we dare to hold hands in public.

Wade is well within his second amendment rights. The number of guns he has isn't really any of your business.

Where's your ugly fucking dog?

Detective Adams really was trying for a stabing tonight. Logan just started walking towards Union station.

Good night, Detective. I'll let you know when the autopsy report comes in. And he would, too. For years, the whole department tried to figure out who was leaking details to M.F.M. L.L.C. surely those rich fucks were bribing somone. The truth is Yukio years ago had hacked and provided access to KCPDs network with a perfect and undetectable program, everything they know or put on a computer Wade and Logan knew. What they knew was damningly little. The cases had all been put on the back burner.

Wade was bad at math, but even he knows that something hadn't been adding up with this case and the cases associated.

Link to Scene 2

This story is a continuation of the D&W:KoKC storyline. To start at the beginning of it, follow this link

To read the story that leads to KoKC follow this link to the Yaoi

Love is not something I have in short supply, Penut. I love my family with all my heart, I love my partners with all my body. I don't experience jealousy, as long as you come home to me.

I do it all in the name of love.

Even the murders?

Jesus Logan, I was trying to be romantic!

[Private moment between Wade and Logan]

Can you imagine, once Logan's finally gotten comfortable, they go out to a bar or something Wade's being his goofball self dancing to some pop song, he stops for a second and looks at Logan sitting at the bar only to see this face smiling back at him.

To all my Poolverine Kinktober folks.

Remember, this is a direct quote from Hugh himself... use it irresponsibly.

A Deadpool & Wolverine: Kights of Kansas City Story. Amber, Crimson, & Noir

Kansas city, Earth-10005

Scene 2

Funeral for a friend

Maxine and Dal had been one of the few actual friends they had made since moving to KC. The two of them were fire and ice, though or fire and gasoline, depending on the circumstances.

Wade and Logan really had no room or reason to judge on that front. They were still equally prone to fights, Wade once, when particularly aggrieved by a stabbing from Logan, grabbed his 357 Magnum from the silverware drawer and shot Logan point blank in the head... of course, it barely made a dent in Logans metal skull. But the concussion knocked him out for a solid minute. The sound was defining. By the time Logan came too, the cops had already been called. The best soundproofing wouldn't have stopped the neighbors from hearing that bang. That was a mess, but by the end of the day, they'd make equally passionate love to each other. Such was their dynamic. Some might call it toxic. If they were normal mortals, perhaps it would be.

The last time they had seen Maxine alive was at the 4th of July party.

The boys went all out. They brought everyone in the family to town. Vanessa brought Dermot, who was a little more than impressed by the private Jet that waited for all of them at JFK airport. They put everyone up at the nearby Westin hotel. It was a blowout just like the old days, just with more room. They'd catered in BBQ from one of the locally famous restaurants

Since it was a holiday, Althea got to do a few lines of cocain with Dopender and Peter. She wasn't getting any younger, so she'd cut back quite a lot on the hard drugs.

Logan remembers grabbing a scotch before heading to the livingroom to watch the fireworks that would soon be launched from Liberty Memorial, and there they were there, the dozen or so people he'd taken to considering his whole world, a term he'd borrowed from Wade. Dal and Maxine were standing by the Floor to ceiling plate glass window. Almost exactly where he and Wade stood looking out on the city the day they moved into One Park Place. He'd never see Maxine alive after that. She was found dead in Westport. Strangled and dumped.

Autopsy report stated ligature marks

On the neck, something consistent with wire or cord, Logan suspected something of the polypropylene variety. high tensile strength easy to acquire, easier to dispose of. The Petechiae hemorrhaged... she didn't go painlessly, but she wasn't tortured.

He assumed she'd been surprised. Nothing biological under her nails, no immediate signs she fought back.

Toxicology turned up alcohol but not an amount that would indicate she was inebriated beyond a buzz. It's not good to drive, but not at a complete loss of her facility. Lots of people get in trouble with DUIs at that level, just enough to make you think, "You're fine." You're not.

Logan had actually achieved a degree in criminology in the 90s 200+ years, and you got time to pursue all kinds of educational options. However, he wasn't up to speed with current pathology techniques or forensics, Dr. G he was not. He was however a blood hound. Unfortunately, by the time he was able to access the crime scene, anything of use had faded. It smelled like the city and its melange of food, humans, ornamental plants, grass, and car exhaust.

The only thing left a faint hint of the cops who'd worked the scene. He was familiar with KCPD and knew the smells of just about everyone in the homicide department.

He agreed to solve this case at her funeral.

Thankfully, Dal and her had married, and Logan could hear Maxines mother throwing a fit quiet yelling at Dal at the grave side service. Had she had her way It would have been Maxine's Dead name on her stone, an indignity on top of the indignity of her tragic demise.

After the service ended, Logan and Wade had spoken to her.

Dal, I want to take Maxines case.

As a licensed investigator, I can get ahold of her file with your permission, and if you hire us ...

Logan, that's sweet, but I've been in your house, I don't think I could afford you two.

It'd be pro-bono for a friend.

*giggles* Bono.

*Snikt* Logan drives his claws deep in to Wade's upper arm and shoulder.

NOW IS NOT THE TIME FOR CHILDISH JOKES WADE!

FUCK! damn it! Logan, this was a new suit. I knew I shouldn't have worn a white dress shirt. Damn it!

Holy fuck is he gonna be okay? Did those come out your hand? What the fuck!?

It'd dawned on them in the years they new Dal and Maxine they'd never displayed any of their abilities only once when they'd rescued Dal had Logans claws popped but in the dark and with all the drama she thought he just had a big knife in his hand.

He's fine. He will be healed before we even get back to the car.

Not my suit jacket, though.

Shut up bub, I'll buy you a new jacket.

But yeah.... Dal. We're Mutants. Hopefully, that doesn't change anything.

It doesn't. You two are my friends, and yes, you can have the case. Especially since this one will probably be swept under the rug like the others. Fucking town.

Because they FUCKED in that Honda Odyssey! We all know it!

If dreams were horses, we'd all be riding Hugh Jackman...

Happy birthday to the best Wolverine.

I'm ready for our next adventure, Penut!

“mutually incredible climax”

“wolvie was the bottom”

real lines spoken at disneyland

DISNEYLAND DEADPOOL SAYING HE AND WOLVERINE FUCKED. OK MAN. WHAT THE FUCK EVER.

sir, that man is a bottom

reasons why #poolverine is canon

Ummm, another proofs? Because I said so💅

my need to see that overripe avocado blow the old man's back out after seeing the movie. ugh.

After getting his pocket rocket throughly mangled by Logan's shitty back ally blowjob:

Wade *zipping up and wincing*: I'm sorry but are you like in need of money or...can't imagine you'd get a lot of repeat customers.

Logan "lights up cigarette*: No I just like chewing on dick.

Wade: Cool cool cool. Not exactly the sequence of words I'd put next to "dick" but you do you, girlfriend.

Logan: Same time next week?

Wade: Same time next week ❤️