Jongho Angst - Tumblr Posts

can I request a mafia ot8 x reader? where they all kept a secret from her which made her feel betrayed like she wasn’t a part of the team so like she reverted back to her old self (cold, not talking to them at all, being strictly profesional) and each one of them regrets it

CAN WE GO BACK?

Pairing: Mafia! Ateez x f!reader

Genre: Angst, Mafia, Mature

W.C: 4.2k

Warnings: arguments, regret, trust issues, keeping secrets, mention of death and mafia business and deals, traumas and betrayals.

Networks: @cultofdionysusnet @k-vanity

Note: Thanks for reading and reblogging. I appreciate all of your reviews and feel free to text me if you want. Spread love to others, not hate. I swear if I write one more angst fic then I will end up crying a river. I have made this fic a little bit less angst and let me know how it is.

"Where are they?" You asked Mr. Na with balancing the snacks in your hold.

He looked at you with a frown and glanced at the papers. It was afternoon and you thought to meet your boyfriends in the office but they were not there. It's unusual for them to not be there without telling you where they are going to.

You pout and placed the snacks on the table and munched on one of your favorites. You waited for him to reply but he seemed to return back to his work. "Hey! I asked you something and you are ignoring me. You know who I am right?" You asked him in a threatening tone and he was still not fazed by you.

"I can't hear you. I'm busy." He didn't look up from his paper-works and you got mad.

You slammed your hand on the table in front of him and glared at him. He rolled his eyes with a bored look on his face.

"How will I know where  are they? And also didn't you have a mission this morning? Why are you back so early and annoying me?"

"Me annoying you. I would never." You faked a hurt look on your face and acted to have a heart attack. "I had my missions and I did well. I was really disappointed that those shitheads were not afraid of me at first but were insulting me more. So instead of letting to have them taste of my precious words, I planted some bullets in their head."

He chuckled, "as expected from you."

"But don't you really know where they are...they are not even picking up my calls." You looked down at your phone, still no missed calls or any messages.

"How will I know about it? You are their girlfriend and if they are keeping something so confidential to them, it can only meant that it's to remain within the family and as you are also part of the family so I hope they won't tell me anything about it." He said and went back to his work.

You are their family.

"But they didn't told you anything like if I return or something and where to find them?"

He glared, "no. But they were pretty much in hurry when they left the place and I thought you knew about it. So don't ask me again."

"Jaemin-" "Don't call me by my name during working hours."

You scoffed, "just now you told me that I'm their girlfriend and now you are raising your voice at me. Also, mafia business is for 24/7 so I can call you anything anytime and anywhere."

Jaemin clicked on a website and replied, " it was good when you were of cold personality and kept your distance with everyone. It's pretty much annoying that you always pick me to disturb and interrupt my works."

"Oh come on Jaemin, you love me too much. And just remember if I return back to that self, it will be only when something like in the past has hurt me again. And I really don't want to be like that again. I like being so happy and free everytime."

You were sad and your words were pronounced clearly that made him understand that he should not have said those harsh words to you. He knew how pathetic and vulnerable your past was but still his work load and you in between made him slip those words.

He patted your head, "y/n, I'm sorry. Really. I didn't mean like that. I really love to see you so bubbly. They have totally changed you and to see you happy with them is really the best thing in this building."

"You still don't trust me?"

"No no you are the lovely and the best sister I have got here and please don't mind my words like this. Please don't feel sad."

He was really trying his best to hold back his tears and make you trust him that the little suspicion he had back then when you joined the company had disappeared eventually. He always thought of you as the distraction in their life but now he sees you as a blessing. He is a best brother to you.

"Never. I can't feel sad with you atleast. You are not getting rid of me anytime soon."

A ring from Jaemin's phone interrupted your conversation with him, you both watched the name displayed on the screen 'Sir Yunho'. His eyes went wide and stared at the phone and you clutched yours in the hold.

You urged him to pick it up and put it on speaker. He received the call and you leaned forward to scan the drafts on the computer screen on which he was working.

"Has Y/n returned yet?" The voice from the other end was rough and tired.

"She-" you pressed a finger on your lips and signalled him to not tell them about your arrival. "No she hasn't returned yet, let me ask her."

"No let her be. We will be back soon from the business. If she returns then tell her we are out for lunch." He spoke in a hurry.

The call was passed to someone else. Jaemin was surprised that they just told to not tell you that they were out somewhere and even told him to lie to you. He was watching you how you were staring blankly at your phone.

"Jaemin, what happened?" Hongjoong was angry but still he was trying to contain his anger. The younger boy was distracted and soon collected himself to reply back.

"Oh just, some works are pending so I got distracted."

"okay."

The call was cut and you stood up. He was about to say something to you but you raised your hand making him shut and you turned towards the meeting room. The room which belongs to you too but now somehow it felt many secrets are hidden behind it, from you.

he watched you walking towards the room with lost eyes and tired form. He shook his head at the thought that it was not good whatever was going to happen because it's not a good decision for them to keep this sudden business hidden from you.

Where were they even? Why didn't they tell you about it?

These thoughts were storming inside your mind after you entered the room. Your fingers curled into a fist and threw the vase which was placed on top of the side shelf above which a beautiful family picture with you smiling with your boyfriends were hanging. You glared at the picture.

"Where are you all? Don't you all trust me that you had to keep this sudden business as a secret from me?"

You harshly wiped away the tears from your eyes and looked around the room. It was same as earlier when  you noticed before leaving in the morning. You slowly walked towards the leader's chair at the end of the table. 

You sat on it and held the armrest tightly. You turned it around to face the wall behind you. The letters on the wall were piercing your eyes which were designed with orange and black LED mini lights, 'ATEEZ'.

Your family.

"Don't you all trust me as your family?"

The more you were thinking about the situation, the more you felt like convincing yourself that you were just overreacting and after they come back from the place, they will tell you the truth and everything related to it but still somewhere you were impatient.

They know that keeping secrets only triggers you but still they chose to do it.

. . .

"Is she here?" Jongho's voice made Jaemin look up from the computer screen.

Jaemin stood up and greeted him and the rest who were chit chatting in the back. "Y-yeah, she just returned right now."

Jongho smiled and said, "you don't have to work on this today. We need this after two weeks so go have some free time with your friends. Don't stress yourself."

Jaemin nodded and sat down.

"Let's head to the meeting room first and she must be waiting for us in the cafeteria." Yeosang's cheerful voice made everyone laugh and there was a warm feeling in their hearts that you were waiting for them.

Jaemin's eyes followed them going to the same direction where you went earlier. Heavy boots clicked the marble floor with dark looks radiating from them but everyone had a small smile resting on their face because of the thought of you.

Seonghwa opened the heavy metal door only to be greeted by broken pieces of fiber scattered on the floors and then he noticed the vase in front of their picture was lying broken.

"Who the hell did this?" Hongjoong's angry voice brought the others attention to the situation.

"Welcome back, Ateez."

Their eyes followed the source of the voice and noticed the leader's chair facing backward to the table. They couldn't see the person sitting on it due to the high rise of the leather of the backrest but the voice was pretty much familiar, the one they crave to listen often, almost every time.

You swiveled around the chair to face them and they noticed you sitting on it with one leg over the another and staring at your phone.

San was last to enter the meeting room and when he closed the door behind him, he noticed the whole situation and the destruction on the floor.

"You look cute when you sit on this chair."

You ignored Hongjoong's compliment and he was surprised that you didn't reply him back. If it was some other time then you would have teased him or said that you always look better than him and then he would have placed you on his lap and proceed with things.

"How did your mission go?" You glared when San went to touch your cheek after asking the question. He thought you were joking so he again raised his hand only to get swatted away by you.

"Sir San, please keep your hands off from me. You should not touch me like this way."

He laughed, " are you putting up a new act again from a movie?"

"Hey let's get some food in the cafeteria." Yeosang said and smiled towards you while approaching you.

You gave both of them a stern look before staring at the man standing across from you in the far end of the table. He was watching you intently.

Hongjoong leaned forward and supported his hands on the edge of the table, "why are you speaking like this? What's with your behavior with them?"

"How does it feel to be the leader and sitting here? Very authentic, right leader?"

Leader...you don't call him this anymore because after the day they turned you into this new personality, you always call them by their name just to feel them more closer. It makes you feel a family with them.

"Why are you asking this all of a sudden?" Seonghwa behind him asked you and you fished your phone inside your pocket of the combat pants and poked the inside of your cheek.

"Why don't you all take a seat? We need to discuss something about business." 

Your words were like a business partner waiting for them to make a deal not their girlfriend who was waiting for their return.

No one budged from their place and you rolled your eyes. You stood up but stayed beside the chair and spin it around. Their eyes followed your movements.

"I thought sitting here will make me the leader but I see that's not the case here."

Wooyoung sat in the second chair at the side of the table.

"Where were you all?" You asked.

Jongho scanned the room to see all of them were busy staring at you and so he said, "we were out for lunch." He nodded in the end.

You bitterly chuckled, "from nine in the morning to this later afternoon...almost four o'clock...you all were out for so long. Just for lunch?"

"We were not out for so long." Hongjoong said confidently.

"Of course. But that's not according to my watch."

"Why the vase is broken?" You smirked at Seonghwa's question.

"Ah finally the question I wanted.well, I broke it."

"Why?"

"And if I ask you the same question Seonghwa, why?"

Mingi interjected, "what do you mean by why?"

San was still standing confused beside the chair on the other side.

"I am asking you all again and for the last time. Where were you all?" Your words were so loud and this sudden yell made some of them surprised and others were still staring at you.

Mingi was quick to reply, "as he said we were out for lunch."

"Don't lie to me. If you don't want to tell the truth then shut up." You clenched your jaw.

"What makes you think like that?" Yunho asked and folded his hands above his chest.

"Oh come on Yunho, you told Jaemin to lie to me that you were out for lunch when you were actually on a secret business. Am I right?"

He was surprised that you knew about it. Wooyoung leaned back to his chair and said, "y/n, it's not like that. That's just a simple issue."

"Then why can't anyone of you tell me where you all were."

Jongho cleared his throat and said, "it's better for you to not know about it."

"Do you think of me as a spy?"

"Y/n no we can't ever think of you like that. Even if you did something wrong then we can always talk it out with each other but we will never suspect you for anything." Jongho quickly stated.

Hongjoong's boot echoed in the room and he stood in front of you. You glared at him when he placed his hand on your shoulder.

"Don't try to manipulate me or try to convince me to trust your lies. You promised me to never hide anything from me but suddenly you all are hiding something from me."

He nodded, "I know but I want you to calm down for me. Please." You scoffed. Another presence made an appearance beside you both but you were yet to notice it but when he spoke up you became more annoyed with the same words.

You pushed away the hand from your shoulder.

"Not always everything can be said to everyone. Sometimes its better to keep some things secret."Seonghwa said and held your hands in his and caressed them a little, "it's for your safety and well being."

He seemed to be calm and contented but deep down he was deeply hurt to see you acting distant with him and not even smiling a bit when he was so near to you. He was holding your hand but he wanted to pull you in a hug.

"We just want to keep you safe, y/n." Yunho stated very slowly and he was sad.

He is always the first person to pull you in a hug and fill you with love and praises and today he would have appreciated you for your success and instead of this dark environment, the room would have filled with laughter when he would have held you up and spin you around in the room.

Mingi stood behind you and prevented you to move away and whispered words to calm you down and to take everything slowly. But you were not in a mood. He was still process the fact that you came to know about the secret business.

You pulled your hands harshly from the grip and shouted which made the person behind you to stumble backward.

"Can you all stop pretending that you all did nothing wrong? If I'm overthinking then let me be like this but you know I hate when my own family hide something from me. It make me feels like I am not trusted. It reminds me of my past."

Wooyoung hesitated to speak anything but still clenched his fist, "no love, we trust you the most. Believe me."

You ignored his words and sat on the chair beside him. Seonghwa was about to say something but Hongjoong held his hand up to make him quiet. The past traumas always triggered you whenever someone lied to you or hide something from you but still he did it.

Rest of them were aware of this situation too. Your words were feeling so distant and you being so hyper was normal for you to act this way. Atleast they should have think about this situation before. You held your head over the table and grabbed your hairs and Wooyoung stared at you with hurtful eyes.

You looked like that old y/n who was with cold heart, piercing eyes and distant space with them. Not their usual y/n with the warm heart, sweet smile and confidence.

Hongjoong was about to pass by you to go towards his chair when he halted in his steps behind you, he raised his hands to pat your head but the younger one beside you grabbed it and glared at him.

"I told you to tell her about the situation but still you were persistent with your decision. Look what you have done." Wooyoung didn't mind to raise his voice at his brother but the leader just nodded to his words and retreated his hand back.

He went to his seat and signaled others to do the same. They all were glancing at you. You were near the leader and San who was across from you was glancing between you and the leader.

He wanted to just pull you towards him and take you away somewhere else just to calm you down and make you feel loved.

When you noticed everyone was seated, you raised your head and blankly asked, "I assume you all to start speaking now. And only the truth."

"We were with your dad and Mr. Lee." Hongjoong started the conversation.

"Don't ever refer that monster as my dad. He is no one to me."

"Mr. Lee's daughter..." he paused and looked around for anyone else to continue and Yunho nodded.

Yunho smiled but quickly erased it when he saw your fuming eyes, "his daughter is engaged to Hongjoong and Seonghwa because once we had a deal in the past to save our organization and today we were there to break the dealership with him."

When the topic finally started. each one of them had a same feelings tugging at their heart. the feeling of regrets. All of them were regretting to keep you oblivion to this.

You scoffed, "engaged?" your eyes took in each of their looks precisely and continued, "so its not about only today. you all were hiding it from me for a long time now. and for how long?"

"it's not like that."

"Yunho, I asked you for how long you all were preparing for this business and when all this engagement happened?" you asked and leaned back into your chair. Mingi was impatiently tapping the top of the table with the back of the pen.

Seonghwa patted Yunho's back  when he was on the verge of tears hearing your harsh and cold tone. he gulped and started to reply but his lost eyes were staring at you and you were not even minding his presence and Mingi chimed in, "last year. your da- I mean Mr. Byun offered this deal so that we could recover from the loss we had in the last year."

Yeosang added, "we thought to not worry you about this whole ordeal and we could have solved it without including you and then pretend that we were never in this situation."

"we always wanted the best for you. please don't feel sad." Wooyound said slowly beside you and you rolled your eyes.

"So I have been lied for one whole year. you made my only chance to go in vain. why? you thought I will be a problem  in this?" you turned towards the leader "were you planning to get married? why did you have to hide this whole thing?"

Jongho was curious, "what only chance you are talking about?"

you smirked at him, "I could have showed Mr. Byun that I have a family which he never gave me. I could have showed him how powerful I am. I am not the weak one he wanted me to be. I could have proved that I am being loved and trusted as a family." You paused and scoffed, “but I think I was delusional all these times.”

Hongjoong clenched his fist on hearing your words and sighed, "Wooyoung and Yunho wanted to tell you about this but I told them and others to keep this discussion away from you. I didn't want to include you because-"

"because you dont trust me. you thought I will support Mr. Byun when you all were crashing to the ground?"

San quickly denied, "no no. we trust you so much y/n. we thought hearing his name or facing him would have hurt you."

Hongjoong nodded and continued, "it would have been more dramatic if people came to know about your relation with Mr. Byun and that you are a part of us inspite of him being our enemy."

"you see me as your enemy?"

"what? no." wooyoung shouted those words at you.

Seonghwa stated quietly, "I'm sorry. I should not have hide these things from you. you should have been told about this earlier. it's really worse for you to find it like this. but trust me we were scared. how to protect you and maintain our organization."

"you made me feel like an outsider."

"I know we did it in that way." Mingi said and looked down.

"After this I can't trust anyone of you like before. Every time now I would feel like you guys are hiding something from me. I will feel like I am somehow related to your enemy and still like before you have the suspicion of me going against you someday."

you paused and inhaled sharply, "I don't know if you guys trust me or not but I have always trusted you more than everything. I trusted you all and whatever you did was to keep me safe and away from this to not hurt me but...atleast you should have let me know about it. My trust would not have broken like this."

Yunho stood up and walked towards you, he turned around your chair and kneeled down, "please Y/n, please we won't hide anything again from you. please talk to me but don't distance yourself from us."

"you gave me no other option. they were engaged all these times, you all met Mr. Byun often and made deals behind my back without even letting me to get a hint of it. I was blinded by the trust that I never noticed you all were lying to me all these times when you were actually going out not to hangout but to meet that monster and this new girl."

You were blinded by the trust that you never noticed they were lying to you.

Wooyoung hugged you from behind, "We only love you. you are everything to me. I never wanted to lie to you but this was the only option. please forget about this and lets go back to normal."

you removed both of their hands from you and stood up. everyone was attentive to your movements. you glanced at the clock and sighed. you were tired and hungry and frustrated. All at the same time and you felt a wave of anger rising inside you.

"you are not leaving us, right?"

"Jongho if I leave right now then where is the thing called 'we can talk out our problems' but yeah that's true that you have made me feel lose my trust on you all."

you paused and then added, "Are you two still engaged with her?"

"yes." both of them quickly replied.

"get rid of her quickly or I will get rid of her from this world."

Both of them nodded.

they all gulped hearing your words and Yeosang grabbed your hand when you stepped forward for the door. you eyed his hand, waited for him to say whatever he wanted but you didn't look in his eyes. you knew if you look at him, you might start crying but you needed some time to recover from this whole situation. 

"I'm sorry."

you knew he was sorry but still you were having so many thoughts that you couldn't still place things right on the places. once your trust is broken, it can't be mended so easily and they knew this. each of them were regretting.

"do you trust me?" your words were meant for all and he nodded quickly. you rolled your eyes and licked your lips.

"the ones who trust me, please follow me to the research room, I have kept the pen drive and file there so I can show you the details of it."

"Will you not eat?" San asked you quietly.

"I am not hungry. Finish the research room process with me and then I need to...I will have some time alone."

you glared towards Hongjoong and Seonghwa and left the room, slamming the door shut behind you. They didn't say anything. after all, it was their fault and you felt betrayed with them hiding things from you for one whole year. Mingi was the next one to leave room to quickly follow you and others sighed.

They need to start to build the trust from the beginning. You wanted to hate them but your trust and love for them was too much to hate them. To forget them as your family.

You smiled towards him and pecked him.

you once said, "how can I trust you?"

he smiled and hugged you, "your enemy is my enemy. our enemy and there is nothing that can come between us to tear us apart. you are the precious and the knot of this family. if someone hurts you, we all will be hurt and get scattered."

“We will never lie to you and there will be no secret between us.”

Was that all a lie then?

Taglist: @mymoodwriting @justhere4kpop @anyamaris @yeoobin @icchyi @jwnghyuns @piratequeen-queenofgames @dinonuguaegi @oreharuuu @hwanring @sanwifesstuff @kiwiisnthereoops @kiwiraccoon @hyuukah @kazscara @aceofspadesbiofalltrades @nvdhrzn [open!]

Torn Patience | cjh

jongho x reader 18+ only, minor dni warnings: non-con, mention of stalking, mild somnophilia, yandere behavior, dacryphilia, fingering, masturbation, bit of rough grabbing

a/n: not the most intense thing on this platform by any means but one of the more dark things I've written. I left out a lot in trying to make it too dark for a short drabble but it still could be triggering so read the warnings PLEASE

“I LOVE YOU! I LOVE YOU! I LOVE YOU! I’m going crazy. It’s because I love you.”

You flinched. Everything had escalated so quickly.

10 minutes ago, he was kissing you so deeply it made your head spin but after a simple rejection he was now a madman.

“Jongho I-”

“No! No you’re done talking. Do you understand how long I’ve waited to breathe your air? Touch your skin?”

He’s quiet, staring incredulously but you stay silent knowing he doesn’t really want an answer from you. He slowly knelt down. “I’m sorry. I am so so sorry but you don’t have a choice anymore.”

Before his words can settle in your mind for reaction, his hands are grabbing you and throwing you over his shoulder. You yelp grab at the back of his shirt.

He expertly navigates to your bedroom. Passing your closed office door and the bathroom straight in to throw you on the bed. “How did-”

He leans down, getting in your face and caging you in place with fist on the mattress on either side of you. “Baby, didn’t I say I waited so long? In that time I had to do something.”

He leans down grazing your neck. You were sure he sniffed you but you were too confused and frightened to care about the smallest of his transgressions. He stood up suddenly, backing up with his normal smile. It was adorable as he chuckled. If it wasn’t for the things he was saying you would think he just played a horrible prank on you. “In that time, I had to keep myself sane. My brothers told me to “ease up” “give this one space”. Hwa hyung always says “Patience is a virtue” but he’s never been in love like this.” At those words his smile fades, his eyes are dark and lidded. “I familiarized myself with your home. Our home. Left traces of me everywhere and took things of yours you wouldn’t miss until I could move in and return them.”

“You l-left things?”

“Of course. I couldn’t have you feeling lonely.

You looked down as your eyes widened, thinking about all the times you smelled wiffs of an unfamiliar scent in your house.

He grows excited. “Did you notice? I knew it! I knew you would appreciate it!”

“What did you do?”

He doesn’t even realize your disgust. “I would wash my face with your products, or lay in your bed when your were working overtime. I perfected the way you made your bed before I got in. Couldn’t mess up your routine. I even thought about you in the shower. Never turned it on though, I coudn’t be too reckless.” he laughed despite the other reckless things he just named. “Did you ever notice?”

The thought always worked him up. Knowing that you could see his cum on the walls of the shower or by the drain. But no, you never did. He knew you mindlessly wandered to the shower not even bothering to look as you reached in to turn it on before stripping. His gifts were washed away before you even appreciated them. But he never minded too much. He knew when the day finally came he would give you a better gift.

“No? Don’t worry, we shared some of those moments together.” he brushed hair way from your face.

Your head snapped up. “What do you mean by that?”

“I had you share moments with me.” The hand that moved the hair begins to stroke your head gently. “A few times I needed to feel closer to you.”

“Jongho-”

“I just pulled the covers back.”

“Jongho stop-”

“You were so pretty. So delicate laying there waiting for me.”

You plugged your ears.

“I gave you everything I had, usually on your sheets but you can’t blame me for loosing control. But only once, I wiped you clean after.”

“You-You-” You pulled back, cradling and covering yourself.

Quickly, he caught on to your assumption. “_____, not that! I wouldn’t!”

Your eyes bulged. “Not that?? You’ve admitted to breaking and entering, stalking, stealing, and god knows what else your cryptic words mean.”

He sighed, hand fisting the fabric of his shirt over his stomach to keep himself grounded. “I told you I love you and that I have been waiting! I wanted to see your face, I want you fully awake for our first time. Isn’t that more special?”

You ignored his creepy question. “You said we shared a moment.”

“If I’m going to pleasure myself I want to share that with you whenever possible. I restrained myself everytime from waking you up on my cock but fuck-” His hand travels south. “If I’m stuck fucking my hand I needed to atleast be near you.”

You stayed quiet, looking on frightened and wary as he started to touch himself. “I promise I kept the best parts for us to experience together. You can’t blame me for needing you.”

He started to breath harder. His knee propped up on the bed and you scooted back as his hand slipped into his waist band now. “It was only looking at first but then I-I needed to touch you. Your skin was so soft.”

Flashes of your form in the dark room came to mind. How you shuddered in your sleep when he dragged his knuckles down your side. Just moments before he had been afraid to touch you, nearly cumming when he first felt the softness under his fingers. He tugged on his cock as he stared at you. A darker part of him wishing you would wake up and see him, give him an excuse to take you then. You would be happy to see him he just knew it. But instead the gentle breathing continued as he spilled onto your bed, milking his cock for everything he had. Only for you. 

He wiped up a majority leaving only suspicious looking stains on the sheets. Before he cleaned his hand he touched your ass through your sleep shorts. He told himself he didn’t mean to leave a stain but of course he did. The most he could do to mark you in some way without loosing all his senses.

Your whimpers brought him back to reality. Back to you cowering on the bed, eyes glued to the outline of what was happening behind the fabric of his pants. He smiled.

“I won’t leave you out this time.” he grabbed your thighs roughly dragging you down the bed. 

Feebly you protested, trying to keep your knees together. “Jongho don’t-” 

His hands pried them apart with little effort. The skirt from your date pushed up to your waist from your open thighs. His eyes sparkled with delight. “Is this for me?” His fingers ran down the wet spot on your panties, pushing the fabric against your heat further. Your legs tried to close again when he brushed your sensitive clit but he was too fast. You listened to his deep chuckle as you squeezed your eyes shut. You were angry at your body for betraying you. You rationalized that it was from making out with him earlier. However you knew that wasn’t the full truth, the look of him standing over you while he pleasured himself to the thought of you was also the cause. But how could you rationize THAT?

You should be scared. You ARE scared.

So what is happening?

Too lost in your thoughts, he began to slip off your panties. You regained sanity to grab them. You shook your head as he tried to tug them down. 

He looked almost bored for a moment before he moved his hand briefly only to rip them. You tried to hold the fabric but it was no use. He peeled the wet cotton away and cursed.

“Jongho-” you meekly called. He looked up to your face, tears pricking your eyes. He watched, waiting until one fell before moving to hover over you. Wiping it with the back of his finger, he brings it to his mouth. He licks obscenely before moving the digit downward. You feel it slip past your clit trying to close your legs but his legs are preventing you from doing so. Before you can try to move further, his finger is slipping into your entrance. Your mouth opens, dropping soft sounds into his ears. Half protest half moan.

“We’re finally sharing this moment. I knew it would be worth it to see your face.” The face in question wet with tears from the jumble of emotions both frightening and increasingly pleasurable.

He smiles before laying a soft kiss to side of your mouth. “I love you.”

first sentence prompt from here ♡ spooky season 2023

the fight w/ choi jongho

kind of proof read but also kind of not….

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as your boyfriend turns to face the counter, expression stern and shoulders tense, you realise that that’s it; you’ve reached the end of your argument. there’s more you want to say, more you feel you should say, but then jongho says, “i’m done talking about this,” in a tone so strict that immediately your mouth snaps shut. you swallow your words but they seem to get stuck in your throat, a painful lump forming in their wake.

you’ve been crying for a while now. the anger from your argument had manifested itself in the form of hot tears that streamed down your cheeks as you stumbled your way through an argument that erupted over something that seems entirely irrelevant now. something to do with the dishes; the cause of it all is foggy, just like your vision as you angrily swipe at your eyes. you want to fight back and have the final word, but the words still refuse to come out.

so you turn around and walk away. if you can’t have the last word, then you need to find some other way to cool yourself down. it makes you feel a little toxic when you pull your car keys from the table but your blood is boiling just enough to make it seem rational for you to leave jongho alone for the night. he hates going to sleep when you’re still mad at each other, you remind yourself, but you hate sitting and stewing in his frustration as you wait for him to finally be ready to talk about it. if he wants to talk about it later, he can wait until you come back tomorrow.

“where are you going?” he yells through the apartment as the keys clink in your hands. you don’t answer, a petty part of your brain wanting to give him the silence that he claimed to want. it doesn’t surprise you when you hear his heavy footsteps thud down the corridor, a shoulder softly brushing past yours as jongho moves to block your exit, “you’re not going anywhere alone at this time of night.”

you shrug, bending down to grab a pair of sneakers which you lift up by their tied laces. your fingers fumble over them as you desperately try to get them undone. it hadn’t occurred to you that your hands were shaking until now; until you desperately needed them not to be. it’s humiliating to stand before the man you love, angry tears washing away your makeup as you fail to do a task so simple that even children can do it. you let out a growl of frustration as a new wave of hot tears fill your waterline, threatening to fall free the moment you decide to blink. they cloud your vision making your task even harder, so you squeeze your eyes closed to rid yourself of them.

you feel them roll dramatically down your face, tickling your skin as they reach your jawline. they drip from your face, toppling onto your fingers and making your impossible task even more impossible. in a fit of annoyance, you toss the shoes to the ground and throw your hands up to your face. the shoes can fucking win, for all you care; what’s one more fight lost?

but then you hear a sigh and the quiet tap, tap, tap of feet and suddenly you’re enveloped in a pair of warm arms. you can practically feel the annoyance flowing from your boyfriend’s body as he moves to pet the back of your skull, but you can also feel him trying to hide it. his movements are soft despite his breathing being heavy, and his hug is just as tight with love as his jaw is with rage. even through his own anger, he’s taking care of you; you can’t help but feel a little guilty at that.

“forget the shoes,” he grumbles, voice still just as stern as it was moments before, “i wouldn’t have let you go anyway.”

“you can’t keep me trapped here,” you sob into his jumper. his grip only tightens.

“i’m not trapping you here, dingus,” his lips are hot as they press a firm kiss to your head, “it’s dark outside and if you can’t get your laces undone then you certainly can’t fucking drive. i’m mad at you but i’m not about to let you put yourself in danger, idiot.”

“fine, then,” you whine, “you drive me to my parents house.”

“is that what you want?” he asks as he settles his cheek against your forehead. it’s warm and soft and it feels so natural rested there. you cant help it when you nuzzle into it, just like he can’t help the fond hum that fights it’s way through the wall of anger to escape his lips. instinct takes over as you subconsciously wind your own arms around his waist, tugging him closer to your shaking form.

and for a moment, everything seems normal.

“well?” he purrs, voice slightly muffled by the way your head squishes his face.

“i don’t know,” it’s not really an answer, but at least it’s honest.

because in truth, you don’t know. the smothering weight of jongho’s anger is almost too much to take sometimes, suffocating you as he takes himself off to somewhere private to stew in it until he’s ready to talk. most of the time it’s okay. you can live with sitting alone in the living room until he’s ready to come crawling to you with his tail between his legs as he searches for affection. when it involves you, though, you really can’t. because then it’s not just his frustration you’re sitting in, but your own too and that’s just all too much. if he doesn’t want to talk it through right now, before your brain had time to find a million reasons to blame yourself, then you’re going to have to step away.

just for tonight, just until the anger is over.

but jongho lets out another heavy breath, a contemplative hum coming immediately after. the hands that still rest heavy on your body seem to tighten, dragging you in unfathomably closer. just by the way he’s touching you, it’s not hard to tell that he hates the fact that you leaving is still on the table.

“what can i do to make you sure?” he purrs, voice softer than you’d heard it all night. it’s almost like he’s talking to a scared dog, trying to soothe it just enough so it doesn’t run. you can’t help but feel every bit like that dog; cornered and scared yet so in need of the slightest bit of love that for a second or two, it considers just giving in. that dog never knows. maybe this time won’t be as bad as the last, after all. maybe it won’t need to run.

“talk,” you reply.

“baby, lat—”

“not later, jongho,” there’s a crack in your voice, warning you that if you push yourself too far the tears will come right back. jongho seems to notice it too; he keeps his mouth shut, not wanting to cause any more anger between the both of you. you suck in a deep breath, “i don’t want to sit in my head for hours until you decide you’re ready, jongho. being left alone in the knowledge that you’re in the next room just completely mad at me makes everything worse.”

there’s a few beats of silence, the only sound filling the room being your sniffles. there’s no more rage-filled breathing from him, no more sobs from you. it’s simply the remnants of what has happened; a few post-cry sniffs that remind you that despite the warmth you feel standing in his arms, none of this is as good as it feels right now.

and yet none of it is as bad as it seemed just moments before…

“i’m still annoyed with you, honey,” it certainly doesn’t feel it by the way he has you completely enveloped in his arms. his stance is so protective, his fingers so soft and his cheek so warm. it’s certainly not the posture of someone who doesn’t want to be around you for a little while. “i can’t talk about it with you until i know for certain that i won’t get angry; i don’t want to say anything i don’t mean.”

weirdly enough, as much as you want to hate it, you understand where he’s coming from. you’re still mad too and as much as you can tell yourself that nothing bad will happen, you know deep down that there’s a good chance it will. you don’t want this to be any worse than it already is, but you know that jongho’s method won’t exactly make things better. you’re at an impasse.

“i just don’t like the sitting and waiting, wondering when you’re going to walk through the door and tell me you’re ready,” you sigh into his chest, “it feels wrong, like i’m waiting on death row for my punishment to finally come.”

“so we don’t go to different rooms, then,” he offers, “we go to the bedroom together and we sit with one another until we’re ready to talk. we don’t even have to acknowledge each other if we’re still that angry, but at least you’ll know i’m there.”

“and you’re sure you’ll want to be with me even when you’re mad?” a hand snakes up your spine to pet gently at your hair.

“i always want to be by your side, honey.”

𝐄𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠

ᴾᵃⁱʳⁱⁿᵍˢ: ᴰᵒᶜᵗᵒʳ! ᶜʰᵒⁱ ᴶᵒⁿᵍʰᵒ ˣ ᴬˢˢⁱˢᵗᵃⁿᵗ! ᶠᵉᵐ ᴿᵉᵃᵈᵉʳ

ᵂᵒʳᵈ ᶜᵒᵘⁿᵗ: ⁷.⁴ᵏ

ᴳᵉⁿʳᵉ: ᴬⁿᵍˢᵗ, ᶠˡᵘᶠᶠ..?

ᵂᵃʳⁿⁱⁿᵍˢ: ⁿᵒᵗ ᵃ ʰᵃᵖᵖʸ ᵉⁿᵈⁱⁿᵍ, ᵐᵉⁿᵗⁱᵒⁿˢ ᵒᶠ ᵈᵉᵃᵗʰ, ⁱˡˡⁿᵉˢˢ, ᵐᵉⁿᵗⁱᵒⁿˢ ᵒᶠ ᶜᵘʳˢⁱⁿᵍ, ˢᵗᵃʳᵗˢ ᵒᵘᵗ ᵃˢ ᵉⁿᵉᵐⁱᵉˢ,

ˢʸⁿᵒᵖˢⁱˢ: ʸᵒᵘ ʷᵉʳᵉ ᵃ ᵈᵉᶜᵉⁿᵗˡʸ ⁿᵉʷ ᵍⁱʳˡ ᵃᵗ ᵃ ʰᵒˢᵖⁱᵗᵃˡ ᵃⁿᵈ ᵇᵉᶜᵃᵐᵉ ᵗʰᵉ ᴬˢˢⁱˢᵗᵃⁿᵗ ᵒᶠ ᶜʰᵒⁱ ᴶᵒⁿᵍʰᵒ, ʰᵉ ᵐᵃʸ ʰᵃᵛᵉ ʰⁱᵈ ʰⁱˢ ˢᵉᶜʳᵉᵗˢ ᵇᵘᵗ ʰᵉ ᶜᵒᵘˡᵈⁿ'ᵗ ᵉˣᵖᵉᶜᵗ ʸᵒᵘ ᵗᵒ ⁿᵒᵗ ʰᵃᵛᵉ ˢᵒᵐᵉ ᵒᶠ ʸᵒᵘʳ ᵒʷⁿ

ᴬ/ⁿ: ᴵ'ᵛᵉ ᵈᵉˡᵃʸᵉᵈ ᵗʰⁱˢ ᶠⁱᶜ ᶠᵒʳ ˢᵒ ˡᵒⁿᵍ, ᵐʸ ᵇᵃᵈ ᵗʰᵉʳᵉ 😅, ᵇᵘᵗ ᵘᵐ ʸᵉˢ! ᴵ'ᵐ ˢᵘʳᵖʳⁱˢᵉᵈ ᴵ ᵐᵃⁿᵃᵍᵉᵈ ᵗᵒ ʷʳⁱᵗᵉ ᵃ ᶠⁱᶜ ᵒᶠ ᵗʰⁱˢ ˡᵉⁿᵍᵗʰ ʷⁱᵗʰᵒᵘᵗ ᵍⁱᵛⁱⁿᵍ ᵘᵖ ᵒʳ ⁿᵉᵉᵈⁱⁿᵍ ᵗᵒ ˢᵗᵃʳᵗ ᵒᵛᵉʳ ᵃ ᵈᵒᶻᵉⁿ ᵒᶠ ᵗⁱᵐᵉˢ, ᴵ ʳˡˡʸ ʰᵒᵖᵉ ʸᵒᵘ ᵉⁿʲᵒʸ <³

Things like fate and destiny were unrealistic words in his mind.

He who walked the streets for years alone had known better than anyone that things like love was just something that appeared in the movies, because those who found it in the real world were rarely ever happy.

Why couldn’t humanity just accept simple facts like that? Maybe it wasn't common knowledge but it was surely a simple concept. Why do people have to be so delusional that they shift things that always end bad into something with a happy ending.

To someone like Jongho, all of that was pure bullshit.

San picked up his phone from the table and looked at the contact, quickly excusing himself from the group and leaving to chat with the person on the other line.

“San really does love his girlfriend doesn't he?” Seonghwa mentioned with a smile replacing his regular face as he looked at everyone else who sat at the table.

“He really does, he doesn't even hang out with me anymore.” Wooyoung pouted, bringing a spoonful of his food into his mouth.

“Well it's a moment of happiness for him, let the poor man live.” Hongjoong added, picking up chopsticks and allowing himself to take a bite of his steak.

The others chuckled, allowing themselves to resume in their long awaited meals.

Wooyoung took a chance to glance to the seat over and face Jongho who was just kinda staring blankly into whatever universe he might have been in.

“Jongho you good? You kinda just went into a trance all of a sudden”

Jongho nodded in response “I just don't get why y'all are so happy over something that won't last.”

Everyone's attention shifted from their food to Jongho, even though it was expected from someone like Jongho who had that mindset for a long time, no one would've expected him to be so loud about it.

“Jongho, don't you think that's a bit direct -” Seonghwa managed to mutter out but was unable to complete his sentence due to the interruption.

“I don't get why people make such a big deal when someone speaks the truth. Admit it, if they last it's going to be surprising news for everyone.”

Wooyoung and Hongjoong made eye contact at the words of the youngest. Although no one at the table said anything, they all thought the same thing and no one was going to deny it.

“What did I miss?” San said in a cheerful and enthusiastic tone, sitting down at the table and continuing with his meal but immediately glancing around at the table upon not hearing anyone responding.

“I left for 4 minutes and you guys got into an argument? I swear with you guys.” San muttered playfully which earned a laugh from Wooyoung and a chuckle from Seonghwa. No one had the intention to tell San what had happened while he was gone even though it was almost guaranteed that he wouldn't be offended as he also knew Jongho’s mindset well.

The table became loud, mainly from Wooyoung raging at Hongjoong for certain things he said and always ending up laughing as loud a humanly possible, San also added onto the already unnecessary noise, helping Wooyoung or Hongjoong out in whatever argument they were having based on who's side he was on, Jongho and Seonghwa were quiet and just focused on eating.

Mentions of his girlfriend creeped into the conversation and Jongho couldn't help but roll his eyes, sometimes it was just a sudden mention of “my girlfriend” or sometimes it was her actual name, but she was definitely referenced in the conversation that had nothing to do with her.

Seriously what was so exciting about being with someone romantically? It's always the same outcome of them showing you who they want you to see and then later on switching to take advantage of you whenver you're too deep in their game, same situation everytime, something he'd heard far too many times.

San wouldn't last in his relationship, and Jongho knew it, although he truly dreaded the sight of his friend crying, what could be really do about it? He asked for it… It was all destined when he decided to say yes to the question that could have easily been rejected and avoided, if it was anyone's fault it was San’s.

__________

“Dr. Choi, can I have you check over these?”

The so presumed, Dr. Choi, glanced at the door to see, what he considered, the love shot girl. He didn't have any specific reason for giving you the name other than the fact that he knew you were a little blinded for the feeling of love, and that was practically his only reason behind the nickname, other than the fact that he never really took enough interest in you to memorize your full name.

Handing him your paperwork as he cleared his desk from the already full stack of papers, many empty and waiting to be filled out. You watched as he read over your work and gave it back to you, you stayed in your place, unmoving and waiting for his feedback.

He finally answered, “your work's good, maybe try being more detailed with question 2 and 7, they're too vague and Superior Kim won't like that.”

You glanced back down at your paper, kinda shocked as you read over the marked spots. “Oh my gosh, thank you. I didn't even realize how badly I wrote them… anything else I should take a look at?”

Jongho finally met you in the eye, you could tell that he was annoyed and in his mind it was probably a waste of time to be giving a newbie like you advice. Dr. Choi was a full on experienced doctor, and he knew how to correct his mistakes when he made them, unlike you who still needed to get the okay from another doctor, he wasn't the only annoyed one, you were quite annoyed at yourself too.

“I have a question.” You heard him say… standing up straight and fixing your posture, “Yes…?” You were nervous and you couldn't hide it, Dr. Choi was no ordinary doctor as he was very strict and upfront.

“I'm not in charge of you, so why do you always come to me to check your work?”

Clearing your throat and making eye contact that you tried your best to hold. Choi Jongho had some of the most fierce and direct eyes, yet according to you, they were quite beautiful. Big and a round oval-like shaped, brown and almost looked like the eyes of a baby bear.

“I care about your opinion the most… you are honest and upfront, so that is why I come here instead of going to my section leader.”

You noticed his eyebrow raise, he was a bit confused.

“What about Dr. Kang?”

“He's too warm hearted to point out any visible mistakes.”

“Dr. Park?”

“He points out my mistakes but he often misses a few small details, and he's not as direct with his advice either.”

”Dr. Jung?”

“I'm just too scared go in there…”

You noticed him crack a smile earning a flinch from you in which he noticed, he chuckled lightly and you somewhat wondered what you had said to earn such a reaction from him. Whenever you entered the room his aura always got so serious.

“Alright I guess, you can go, I have work to do.” his smile was still visible, keeping it as he brought all the papers he had been working on in front of him again, making you realize a couple of things as you walked out of his office.

Choi Jongho always checked over your stuff yet for himself he had to do all of the writing and checking, you almost felt bad for always going in there to disrupt his alone time, intruding because you always wanted him to check over what you should've been the one to take full credit for.

Jongho once again got back to work, picking up his pen just to hear the familiar creaking of the door. Somewhat fed up this time, he looked over at the door with a sharp stare making you almost jump out of your soul.

“What now? You already finished more paperwork? I'm jealous, wish I could rush over things like that-”

“No- I just brought you a coffee..”

You completed, speed walking over to his desk to place the warm mug down, rushing over back to the door and shutting it.

Of course Jongho was confused, he couldn't help but chuckle as he questioned your perfect timing. He was somewhat falling asleep and craving a coffee, about to stop his work once again to get up and satisfy his craving. Worried, he took a sip and to his surprise, it tasted exactly how he liked it. Not too sugared yet not too bitter. Most people didn't land in a place right in the middle so it threw him off guard.

How did you know?

____

Day and day again, you entered his office and got his feedback on your work, it happened for days on end. Finally, Superior Kim decided to close up your section for the day in order for him to make a couple of changes in the furniture and in general the way the section was operated, part of those changes involved you moving into the same room as Jongho in order to become his assistant for the time being.

Jongho's original assistant had been on a small hiatus to take a trip to her home country because both of her parents were now disabled and she needed to be there for them, Superior Kim and Dr. Choi were both unsure if she would return to the hospital or find a new job in her hometown. Nevertheless, you were Jongho's assistant for now, which would make things easier for both him and you.

Or so you thought-

Every morning, you entered his, or now to be said your, office with breakfast to find him already sitting down at his desk, computer open and files scattered all over, in shock you brought your morning dish over to your spot and right when you were about sit down he suddenly turns to you and asks you if you could bring him some breakfast too.

Surely, you didn't really have a choice. Your title was assistant after all. It wasn't that you had a problem with it, but it was more unusual, mainly since this was never really the case when you were Dr. Jeong’s assistant, normally his pace would be slow and he wouldn't rush to get started on his work. You both got breakfast, entered the office and sat down on your own seats as you chatted for a bit, waiting for each other to finish before actually starting on your work.

So you went down to get him his breakfast, technically the same thing you got yourself since he never told you what he liked. You served him some apple juice since it was what you liked in the morning, you were never a fan of morning coffee especially because you knew you'd need another cup later on and that'd just be too much coffee for one day.

You brought up his breakfast and watched him stare at his food for a hot moment.

“I'm scared of you.” he finally stated.

“if you don't like it, I can go back down and get you what you want-”

“No, this is exactly what I get too…” he mumbled.

You let out a sigh of relief and went over to sit down on your chair, you wouldn't have much work that day since there wasn't many appointments booked, and the ones that showed up on the chart were really nothing serious, just a couple of check ups.

You glanced at Jongho and rolled your eyes.

“Shouldn't you take a break and eat your breakfast? I don't mean to disrupt you but you don't seem to have that much work today, after eating your breakfast you should also clean up your workspace. That'll make you loose focus.”

Jongho glanced around at his almost fully cover desk and looked back at his almost empty shelves, it was one of the first times he agreed with you other than what you had said about Wooyoung earlier. He looked at you and nodded, clearing his space in the middle in order to make room for his breakfast.

“Let's chat for a bit.” you said

“Did Dr. Jeong teach you that or something?” he grinned, taking a sip of his juice and picking up his tray.

“Precisely.” you added.

“I'm not surprised, he's always been that type. Speaking of… why didn't you go to him for the checking of your work. You were his assistant ya?”

You frowned, slightly trying to think of an appropriate response for his question.

“I really don't know, I think it's mainly because he was always doing so much at once so I kinda felt bad.”

Jongho nodded, understanding where you came from, your breakfast continued as such and the day went on as normal, Jongho asked you for something and you gave it to him, you also took the opportunity to clean his workspace which he questioned you for, in which you always responded.

“I finished my work so I'm technically not prohibited from helping you and this messy area you have going on.”

And well, afterwards he simply let you be, as long as you weren't distracting or bothering him, he was completely fine with you partying inside the office. That was mostly how your life carried along, you entered the hospital, helped Jongho with whatever he needed, did work, and repeat… occasionally having to help with a patient or two, but that wasn't your job so you mainly stayed out of it.

In the beginning you were certain that Jongho hated you… but now that you were his assistant, you weren't sure how to feel. It kinda angered you because you had no idea whether he viewed you somewhat like a friend or if he despised you with all of his heart… you preferred to be some place in the middle.

Even if you both shared an office, he still kept mostly to himself and so did you, the only reason you spoke was mostly for him to check your work and that was really it… although it was upsetting, you were coworkers and had to act like it, there wasn't time to goof around in a place like a hospital and you knew it.

Truthfully more than anyone.

__________

“I'm gonna be heading out, my shift is over and it's late. Is there anything you would like me to know before I leave?”

Although he was focused on the paperwork that was in front of his desk, he heard you and took the opportunity to glance up at you, “You should wait, I'm about to finish this and my shift is over as well, it's dangerous so we should walk home together.”

You stayed silent, mainly because you were trying to figure out if this was just a friendly offer or if he was actually showing genuine interests in you.

Nevertheless, your staring was obvious, which made him take his eyes off his paperwork to look at you.

“We go the same direction, ya?”

You snapped out of your trance and finally nodded. You sat back down on your chair and scrolled through your phone as he finished up the last few questions.

“But try to hurry, I'm hungry so I'm really looking forward to get home.”

He grinned in response to your comment, simply focusing on what was in front of him, of course to him, you were just a coworker and nothing more. His job was serious and nothing to look forward to, you never knew what type of patients would come in so there was no time to laugh.

The atmosphere would stay quiet for the last 7 minutes that you would be in hospital, when Jongho gave you the okay, you both headed out as you waited for him while he gave the key to the next employee, they needed to lock up for the night for safety measures since the hospital staff would be there to open up to anyone who might’ve been in need of care.

“So, why did you wanna walk home with me.” You brought yourself to ask, seeing your cold breath in the air, Jongho refused to look at you in which you found quite funny.

“For both of our safety, walking home this late at night is dangerous.”

You shrugged, “you've let me go at my regular time multiple times before so I don't see much of an issue. It just caught me by surprise.”

Jongho nodded, “I understand.” The walk continued to be silent for the next few minutes, you sighed in debate multiple times until you reached the more public side of the city, you were about 11 minutes away from home and the feeling of hunger was really just eating you up inside.

“Dr. Choi, i'm really hungry, and now i'm lacking motivation to go home and make myself something, so now that we're here, would you like to stop by somewhere and eat? With me possibly?”

You saw a smirk creep up on Jongho's face, noticing his head coming up as he pretended to act surprised, “Are you asking me out on a date?”

“Of course not, do you wanna go with me or not?” You responded annoyed, rolling your eyes at the guy who believed so highly of himself all of a sudden, you heard him chucke, a soft, small chuckle which you had failed to hear be directed at you.

Because he wasn't laughing or poking fun at you, he was laughing at something you had said, and you didn't know if that was a good sign or a death sign.

“Sure, I'll go with you, i'm pretty hungry myself.”

You hadn't noticed the small smile forming on your face, that stupid smile that you hadn't felt since the last time you looked at your highschool crush.

In the end, you both ended up on the outside table of one of your favorite resturants, the lighting was dim and if you looked to your right, you'd see the main city that stood across the wide river. It was a beautiful setting when it came to someone like you, who loved to imagine these sceneries in a painting or a romantic movie.

“Dr. Choi, have you ever liked someone?”

The question caught him off guard, he didn't know what to respond and the only thing he could do was try to move past the question by taking a sip of his drink, playing distracted.

He noticed you nod as you understood what he wanted to tell you, he wasn't comfortable with the subject and that was okay, you weren’t going to judge him.

“I don't know you too well, mind telling me about your childhood?” You asked with the softest eyes he'd seen from you. Sighing, he responded while easing his posture and leaning back on his chair, crossing his arms and looking out into the landscape that overcame the both of you

“I don't know much that I could say, my childhood was for the most part normal. Regular parents with one little brother, we grew up in the isolated town, the type that aren't very known, the ones with a small population, a community of their own.”

“So you grew up in small towns, what made you move to the city?”

Jongho sighed, unknowing of what to say, upon noticing his silence, you were about to dismiss your question until he sat up straigter and began speaking.

“My mom and my dad divorced whenever me and my brother were still young, we were constantly moving in between houses, having to experience every new partner that our parents had, my mom never lasted with any of them and when my dad finally found someone who he felt right, they got really sick and passed away, so he never got his happy ending, they both passed away so there's no turning back now.”

You couldn't help but cover your mouth at his words, in disbelief and feeling guilty for opening up that trauma in him again.

“I'm sorry that happened, I also apologize for asking-”

“It's fine, i'm over it.”

Silence filled the table and things became awkward, you heard him shuffle a bit and then turn back to face you.

“What about you?”

You slightly pouted, crossing your own arms and rocking back and fourth on your own chair.

“I wasn't ever able to enjoy my childhood because I constantly had to be in and out of somewhere, and even though it was meant to help me, little me just thought of it as a prison, but now as an adult I realize the importance of them, currently trying to avoid other children from going through the same thing as me.”

Jongho nodded, slightly smiling from your statement.

“I should call you the queen of vague”

“Hey!?”

Jongho laughed, listening to you ramble on about how it was a sensitive topic and you preferred to be vague about it, he simply nodded and said ‘I understand’ which ticked you off even more, making you continue to yell to him about it, eventually he quieted you down and you relaxed, giving him one last slap on his shoulder and leaving him alone.

Truthfully, you both connected a lot during your dinner, which was unexpected for the both of you. Although the two of you bonded, you agreed to keep things professional at work,

The walk home was full of laughter, you had warmed up to each other and had become comfortable, you felt good enough to playfully push each other or smack each other on the shoulder. The walk went by quickly and the two of you ended up at your separating point without even realizing, your house was one way and his was the other.

“Thank you for this talk Dr. Choi, I think we should get going, it's about to be one in the morning.” You chuckled to which he nodded, his smile never fading.

“You should get some rest, long day tomorrow.”

You nodded, watching him walk away from your street, bringing yourself to turn around, you were ready to get home and flop on your bed, happy that you could consider someone like Dr. Choi a friend.

“Jongho by the way.”

You turned around, hearing his voice speaking, you hadn't been sure if you had heard him right since by that point he was already turning the corner, you stood in the same spot, all sleepiness gone from your head as you replayed his words over and over again.

Did he just say you could call him Jongho?

__________

“I'm starving!!”

“Choi San, please calm down-”

“Choi Jongho, please cheer up”

Jongho glared at San who quickly broke the eye contact to pick up the kimchi that was across the table, adding it to his lunch, Jongho slightly smiled and begun adding his own sauces and seasonings to his food, San begun eating and taking a sip of his americano which sat on the cup holder beside him.

“It's been a while since I've had this-”, his eyes squeezed shut at the burst of flavor that hit his taste buds, using his utensils to rush for another bite of the meal, however he was quick to notice that Jongho wasn't eating, he didn't look upset, more deep in thought.

“Are you not hungry?”

“Oh no, I am.”

“Then what's wrong?”

San genuinely seemed concerned for Jongho's well being, he didn't want him to suddenly grow insecure or go on a diet when he didn't have to, San begun to wonder if Jongho had something wrong that he wasn't aware of.

Jongho leaned forward on the table, grinning with one hand flat on the wood that held all of the food, his lunch and drink pushed aside as Jongho made eye contact with San.

“I have a bit of a problem.”

San’s eyes widened as he only imagined the worst, of course it had to be that. Jongho never invites someone to eat first.

“You're dying!?? Jongho you can't die!!!!”

Jongho flinched, “what..? Where'd you hear that from? No, I'm not dying, i'm still young and have an entire life ahead of me.”

San’s shoulders fell in relief.

“Oh thank god… well then, what's this problem?”

“Well, I may or may not like someone... in more than a plotonic manner..”

Silence filled the room as the information registered into San’s head, then the entire after process of the loading signal before he finally reacted.

“You!? Like you!? Nah, you're joking-”

“I'm not.” He interrupted, keeping his gaze locked and still on San, making him take another sip of his americano, side eyeing Jongho to make sure he wasn't looking at him and upon seeing his gaze fully locked on him, he slowly broke it by looking back at his drink.

“Well… what's she like?”

“It's my assistant in the hospital.” Jongho quickly responded, San nodded as he went back to his food and took a few more spoonfuls before leaning back on his chair and taking some time to relax.

“I don't work at the hospital so I don't know who it is.”

Jongho clicked his tongue and tapped his finger, attempting to search his mind for a comfortable and explainable way of telling him who you were,

“You know Yunho’s assistant?”

“Yeah- L/n Y/n, wonderful girl to be honest-”

“Well her.”

San made a understood head motion while lip syncing an ‘ah’ and grabbing his americano from the table, taking a good gulp of it before the realization hit him.

“She's your assistant now!? What happened with Yunho!?”

“Relax, from what I've been told she's only my assistant temporally, until we figure out whether my former assistant is coming back or not I'll be staying with her.”

“Wait wait wait, let me get this straight… so L/n transferred to your office and became your assistant for the time being… and now you like her?”

Jongho looked away, a bit ashamed, not of you but of himself. Technically everyone knew how Jongho's brain worked so for him to hit them up with something like this was just kinda silly when he himself had said so many negative things about relationships.

“What happened to that old ‘relationships are only for people without a brain-’”

“I never said that!”

San burst out laughing and Jongho just rolled his eyes, finally taking a bite of his own food and nodding in approval to it.

“Listen, I was in the wrong when I said all of that, my opinion hasn't really changed much and truthfully I'm a bit disappointed in myself but… I don't wanna lie to you-”

San tilted his head in confusion, unsure of what his younger friend meant by the statement, “lie to me about what?”

Jongho sighed and explained the entire incident of what happened that day when they met up as a group in the restaurant, explaining what he said about San’s relationship behind his back. What he said was harsh but San was very understanding about It, mocking and cracking a joke about Jongho once or twice again to which Jongho almost cursed San out.

It was a bright setting and the mood was lifted, both of them discussed all those typical relationship things and walked each other home, although Jongho left confused with the entire feeling and exsistance of the word love, San told him to meet up with Seonghwa since despite his status as a single pringle, he was actually very good with relationship advice and quite useful.

And of course when he did, Seonghwa showed an identical reaction to that of San’s, thrilled by how much Jongho had changed in the span of a few months and all because you had become his assistant, and even though Seonghwa truthfully had never met you or known you as Yunho’s assistant, he assumed you were a great person rightfully going off the fact that you were able to pull Jongho.

And his theory about you wasn't wrong, because at the end of the day… you really had become Jongho's everything, and it would stay that way for a long time, he had no idea whether his feelings for you were no more than platonic or actually romantic, so what more could he really go off of other than the fact that you had done something to him, and here he was having no idea what it was.

__________

Jongho just knew something was wrong, it could've just been a gut feeling, or the fact that when he had finally become close with you and all of a sudden you just disappeared… well you didn't just snap out of existence, he saw you, but you no longer showed up to work on schedule or everyday like before, you missed days, and a lot.

And he didn't know how to bring it up to his colleagues, his former assistant missed days regularly so he wasn't ever concerned for her, rarely did the thought of something bad happening to her cross his mind. But for you? For you it was different, because if you missed a day, which itself was already concerning, you'd miss it on notice.

But you haven't done so these days. So what if something bad really did happen to you, or was happening to you?

Jongho snapped out of his trance upon hearing his door slam open, he hadn't noticed he had been staring at plainly nothing and looking like if he was about to pass out, he finally took a glance at his door to find Hongjoong standing in front, looking a bit frightened by Jongho’s appearance among his entry.

“You okay?” Hongjoong questioned, walking over to Jongho's desk and taking a seat from the stack in the corner of the room.

“I've just been thinking about some things.” Jongho responded, letting go of the folder that he was practically squeezing in his grip and leaning back on his chair, slamming the folder on his face in order to shield his eyes from the light.

“It must be really stressing you out if you're like this.” Hongjoong responded, mirroring Jongho's actions by relaxing on the chair that he sat in, Jongho didn't respond and Hongjoong took the moment to change the topic…

Well, slightly.

“Have you visited Y/n yet?”

Jongho's gaze shifted to his superior who sat across from him, all the tension in his body coming back as he realized-

“You know where she is!?”

Hongjoong lifted his head and tilted it slightly, confused he asked, “Did she not tell you?”

Jongho aggressively shook his head in disagreement, which inserted the realization behind Jongho's stress, making Hongjoong lightly let out a curse word.

“It’s a little bit difficult to explain, i'm just confused on why she didn't tell you-” Hongjoong said, lightly scratching the back of his neck nervously and anxiously.

With low patience tolerance, Jongho sighed annoyed at why Hongjoong was unable to explain what you couldn't, grabbing his head in an attempt to cure the unbearable heart-eating headache.

“I really don't know how to tell you but I'll try to keep this professional, she's in the hospital, for personal reasons…”

“The hospital!?” Jongho almost burst into tears, why wouldn't you tell him something like that!?

“Correct.”

“Could I know what those personal reasons are…?” Jongho asked, crossing his fingers from under the table, his eyes watered down and sealed lips to prevent a shaky voice, Hongjoong felt pity… and a lot.

Hongjoong replied, “Trust me.. if I knew I'd tell you, but she hasn't made me aware of the situation either.”

Jongho bit his lip, he was at a loss for words. And the worst part is that he wasn’t going to have time to see you for a few days, all he could do was pray that everything would be fine, that you'd be okay.

___________

He was desperate to see you, so when he saw the first available opportunity, he asked Hongjoong at what hospital you were located and rushed over.

“What are you doing here!?” You nearly screamed at the sight of his face.

“I'm here to see you.” He responded. Sitting up on the hospital bed, you looked down at his hands and noticed the bouquet of flowers, he also held a takeout bag which you assumed was for you.

“Don't tell me you even brought me gifts?” You smirked, not knowing what he'd respond with, he looked to the side and nodded at what you suggested. He put the flowers on your lap and placed the bag next to your bed.

“Whatever helps you sleep at night.” He answered to which you dramatically covered your mouth as if you were offended, “Rude.” You muttered, bringing the bag up and finding your favorite restaurant’s food-to-go laying in a takeout box. You had shared that information with him the day you went to eat together, recommending him the area and sharing your favorite dishes, expressing how much you loved their ice cream and milkshakes. You were surprised he even remembered the name in the first place.

Your expressions reacted quicker than your brain, shifting your head up at him as he sighed, nodding his head, and cutting you off just when you were about to speak.

“Yes, I did try their ice cream and milkshake, and I brought you one too.”

He pointed inside the box and you finally realized the cold drink laying next to a container of french fries, gasping you took out the shake and fries and started diving in, you noticed him looking at you, however not in the usual way. This time his eyes weren't soft like they usually were, his expression screamed anger, fear, injustice, you peaked a look at him and held up your fries.

“I forgot to thank you, I was too excited… would you like some..?” You asked, Jongho simply shook his head in denial, and you stayed looking at him, concern filling your face.

He couldn't possibly know… could he…?

You lightly chuckled, attempting to add some humor into the tense mood of the room, “Why are you just staring like that? You're making me uncomfortable mr…”

Jongho slightly smiled and nodded, “Why didn't you tell me you were here?” He asked, eyes not softening at the slightest as he kept his gaze strong and firm.

“I didn't wanna bother you, everything I say is a bother-” you chuckled once again, however, you noticed his silence to your comment and you knew you messed up.

“Sorry-” you added, feeling your bed sink down upon him sitting on it, caressing your hair and putting it behind your ear. “Please tell me- what's wrong..?”

But you couldn't bring yourself to… How could you bring yourself to? You swore to never tell anyone outside of those who already knew- and you were going to stick to that promise.

“You'll figure it out soon enough.”

You felt his hand slam onto your arm, which caused you to flinch. And that's when you finally noticed his shiny eyes, soft stare, and shaky lips.

“Don’t say that Y/n…”

You couldn't believe your eyes. Jongho, the man who always had a tough figure and personality, was showing you weakness. The man who you always presumed as someone with a high ego, enough to push you away so carelessly, was showing you care and frustration. All because you were in a bad state.

You couldn't say much more than what you already had, and Jongho got the message, because he let go of you and walked out of the room. You couldn't express anymore regret about what you had done, Jongho was crying and it was your fault, but what you had to say… it just… you couldn't say it, because it would pain you more than it would pain him, and you knew it.

But to your surprise, Jongho came to visit you regularly, he made time almost everyday. If you were tired he'd sing you to sleep, if you weren't, he'd stay with you until you were. After you fell asleep he cried, he rested his head, covering his eyes with his palm, the lingering feeling of emotions overtaking his mind, it was driving him crazy.

He asked you to be his girlfriend eventually, to which you accepted. You tried to be happy and energetic around him, and when he asked you to go take a walk, you had no choice but to decline, he brought you food and you let him do a lot of the talking while you ate.

And as time passed that became your daily day, you had medical staff come in, and take care of you, boring day after, and later at night Jongho would come visit you.

He brought you outside like you asked, pushing on the handles as you admired the stars, looking at them from an outside point of view again after a couple of months of not seeing them in that figure.

“The moon looks brighter than I remember-” you excitedly said, looking down at Jongho who was sitting down on the grass.

“I think it's closer to the earth right now because it isn't normally this bright.” He responded, as you chuckled, he made eye contact with you again to which you just laughed from the way he looked up at you.

“I'm really gonna-” he joked before you cut him off, “You don't need to- I just think looking down at you despite the fact that you're taller than me, it's just funny” you said, looking back up at the stars and admiring the view.

Jongho looked back as well, trying to hide his eyes in the darkness, hoping the moon wouldn't illuminate his eyes enough to show you the weakness he held once again, he couldn't help it when he was with you, he just simply couldn't stand seeing you trying to be happy when in reality you were suffering.

He picked himself back up and placed his hand on your thigh, no matter how much you wished to, you couldn't feel his soft and warm hands touching your helpless and uncensoring skin, you both looked into each other's eyes and pressed your lips together.

It was your first kiss with him, so you valued it a lot, feeling his warm lips press up against yours as he smudge his scent all over you, you loved it… it was an obsessing feeling that you couldn't get enough of…

You would miss these moments.

When you both separated, he forced a smile and hugged you tightly, he knew it just as well as you did, you smiled and hugged him back. You weren't going to let the thought overtake the mood, it wasn't going to happen, you were going to make the most of this night, even if your options were limited.

You both went back inside and you watched Jongho leave, coming back with your favorite restaurant once more, taking the bag and milkshake, giving it all to you. He handed you the oreo ice cream he'd got for you and laughed with you, it was the most he'd heard you speak in a long time.

He sang you to sleep once more, this time staying with you all night long and hugging your warm body, he didn't wait to leave, he stayed, all hours of the night, he'd be with you…

__________

Years later, he would be walking the watered down streets to the field covered with sculpted rocks, looking for the specific one, holding flowers and a small box in one hand.

When he finally found it, he sat down and sighed. This had become a regular thing and a daily activity by this time, it had become a regular tradition in his life to visit you 3 times a week at least.

“I had a long day, oh- and I also found this dairy that I believe belonged to you, I found it in the box of things that I stored for you.”

Putting the dairy on his lap, opening it and turning to a specific page, beginning to read it outloud.

“April 7th 2021… They made switches around the hospital, I am now Dr. Choi’s assistant, which I couldn’t determine as a good or bad thing. I've talked about this change previously but now i'm really convinced that being Choi Jongho’s assistant is absolutely a bad thing and something that the demon’s of the other side decided would be my destiny because this man hates my guts. He's rude too… I kinda miss Dr. Jeong-”

He stopped reading and chuckled lightly, looking back at you.

“If you hated me that much you might as well have requested to Hongjoong to go back with Yunho.”

He continued reading.

“However, I'm gonna try to get close with him, I've been interested in him for a long time… I've been coming regularly, trying to get his approval and make him like me a bit more. I don't think bothering him was the right option though, it wasn't my intention haha, future me can't see but I'm actually laughing right now. I hope to come back to this page in the future, but being friends with Choi Jongho. He's a mysterious person so I'd be happy if I gained his trust. If I manage to live long enough, I hope to have a chance with Dr. Choi and be able to call him by his first name, I have so many things I wanna do with him to be honest-”

Jongho stopped, taking a moment to catch his breath and clean his eyes.

“I know it sounds obsessive for me to be writing about him like this, I don't do it often, I just wanna express how I feel, older me will find this so weird too, I kinda do. I really wanna go eat at my favorite restaurant with him, go on late night dates and experience his sincere care.”

Flashbacks replayed in Jongho’s head as he cleaned his eyes once more, remembering if all the things you guys had time to do.

“If I can experience this before I die with Jongho, or really anyone- I'd leave this earth happily. If there's one thing I know for sure it's that I don't have long, but I chose to live my life in happiness over sadness, I can't be sad for the little life I have. Hopefully, i'll be able to meet the right one, and if this sickness allows me too- I hope to get married. I wanna be able to experience my life to the fullest, and live excitedly, not make this lung disease my entire life. I wanna be and will be happy, period.”

Jongho sniffed his nose and placed your dairy in his bag, taking out the small box and putting it down.

“I don't wanna bother you for too long, but I'm gonna be happy and live my life to the fullest, I will always love you, you'll always be my first and only love, nothing or no one will ever change that…”

He fixed the box, placing it on the rock that covered the dirt, the rectangle shaped rock that laid flat on the ground, full of flowers and gifts from your other loved ones who most likely came to visit you regularly as well. He hid the box among the flowers and shielded it from public view, taking a moment to smile once more before leaving.

Things like fate and destiny were unrealistic words in his mind.

He who walked the streets for years alone had known better than anyone that things like love was just something that appeared in the movies, and it would stay that way until the right person walked up to you on their own.

He seriously couldn't understand why humanity just couldn't accept simple facts like that. Maybe it wasn't common knowledge but it was surely a simple concept. He had met the right one when he least expected it. People needed to understand that love is not something someone should search for, because if it's real, the two parties would find each other sololy.

To someone like Jongho, he had found true love and was never going to change that, he was satisfied with how his life turned out and he knew you'd agree… and he'd wait for the day where he'd find you again in this world, and hear you accept the ring that laid inside the sealed box behind all your flowers.

Because at the end of the day, you really had become his everything.

Where Do I Go

bodyguard!jongho x reader (royal?au)

genre and warnings: angst, fluff, suggestive, violence warning

word count: 23k

synopsis: you're the owner of hotel crescent in mist island, where secrets are traded. you're infamously known as the gossip-dealer and known for manipulating people, which means you're not safe. however, the last thing you expect is your power-hungry father to send jongho to be your bodyguard, but you suspect it's not because he fears for your safety but because he wants to keep tabs on you as he joins prince woobin's side while you join prince hongjoong's side. as your father comes from eden to mist island to become the minister of foreign affairs, the political situation between the two nations worsen and you fear for war, but you risk your life for your homeland, and find jongho joining hands with you as you both uncover secrets and betrayals from your father.

You clicked the necklace into place as you stood in front of the mirror, admiring how the ruby provided a starking contrast with your midnight blue gown, the square neckline making a display of your collarbones, the sleeves full and fitted just like the bodice after which it fell in an elegant flair down to your ankles. You clicked your fingers and the maid arrived behind you, fixing the tied curls in your hair upon your indication. Everything about you screamed mystery and power, and you both loved and hated that. 

“I’ll be back soon after midnight- have a warm bath prepared for me.”

“Yes, ma’am,” the maid bowed before leaving and you stepped into your matching flats. For the past half an hour your maid had basically polished you- styling your hair into an elegant but messy bun, doing your routine makeup, dressing you up. It was time to get to the counter and deal with your ‘customers’. You took a deep breath, glancing at the sword that was hanging as a decoration in the living room. Smiling, you left the room and walked downstairs, greeting the maids and waitresses that bowed to you before settling behind the counter, your usual spot where you managed the guests- of course, that was also a pretence among the other things about your personality.

“Good morning, Sakura. I hope everything is in order today.”

“Madame Lee,” the receptionist bowed, motioning you to take her seat- she would now be moving to the other desk until you leave. “Everything is well. I hope you’re doing well.”

“Absolutely,” you smiled, waiting until she was out of sight before you sat and pulled out the register, sitting on your seat and glancing at the few customers you had- some of them were residing temporarily here, while the others dropped by for breakfast- either to meet a resident or to mingle. You sighed, feeling a little bored- you always did, in the mornings it always got interesting around evening, when the people present would exchange gossip and secrets, make decisions that could change the course of this little island that was home to many- Mist Island. 

Of course, no matter whether you were busy or not, time flew. You had quite a few interesting guests in your hotel today, and right now, almost 10 in the night, you were dealing with a… difficult client who was testing your patience with every passing minute.

“Look, Madame,” he began, his eyes travelling all over you as he smirked. “All I’m saying is it’s dangerous business to get involved in places you aren’t meant to be.”

“I hope you haven’t forgotten, Officer,” you sipped tea, glad there was a table between you two- you wanted nothing more than to kick him in the shins. “Money buys everything. You, of all people, should know.”

He raised his brow, wondering just what you were implying. It didn’t help that you wore your statement smile that revealed nothing but at the same time, made men shiver with worry. “Yes… money buys everything.”

You tilted your head, pleased to see he was confused. “If you can afford a secret, we’ll have a deal. You know I only give out freebies if I feel generous, or… if it could provide for some entertainment in this boring town. And frankly… I’m not feeling very generous right now, I’m afraid.”

The Officer made a face, nodding his head slowly in denial more than agreement, his black uniform almost blending with the leather chair in the dim lights. “And what pleases you, Madame? I’ve heard it’s not always money that you demand.”

“A secret in exchange for an even better secret, or… something valuable to you would do,” you grinned and the Officer thought you looked like a magpie at that moment, ready to snatch whatever caught your eye. “So?”

The Officer bit his lips nervously, leaning forward once again. “I’m desperate, Madame. I need to know what the Prince’s Right Hand and the envoy from Eden talked about. Don’t you care about the future of Mist Island? I think that should be enough to tell me the secret- I report to the Prince and I think the Prince’s Right Hand is betraying him-”

“You’re wrong about that, I’ll give you that, at least,” you relaxed back. “The Prince’s Right Hand is very loyal to the Prince- all of Mist Island knows that. You have nothing to worry about- you don’t need to know what they talked about now, do you?”

He almost pulled out his hair and you smiled- he was definitely reporting to someone else other than the Prince. You leaned forward, pretending that you were about to share some scandalous thoughts- and perhaps, you were. “Officer.. If you tell me who you really report to, I’ll give you the secret for free. I promise. And your secret will, of course, stay safe with me.”

The Officer paused, thinking about it. He had clearly not expected the owner of the hotel to be so clever and curious like a cat- it could be your besetting sin, he thought. “Hotel Crescent is an interesting place, I must admit.”

“And you’re welcome here anytime. I don’t forget a face,” you smirked. 

“Well…” the Officer threw his hands in the air before surrendering. “I report to the Minister of Defence. He’s keeping tabs on everyone around the Prince in case someone betrays him- you know how the situation is between Mist Island and Eden these days. He’s preparing us for the worst, he says.”

You only nodded, giving him no reaction. “We should always be prepared for the worst, in any situation. Well, thank you for the information. One of my maids happened to overhear the Prince’s Right Hand and the envoy talk about changing the Minister of Foreign Affairs- perhaps, someone well known in both Eden and Mist. They would prefer someone from Eden, which would be quite… strange, if I have to admit.”

“Ah,” the officer shook his head in disbelief. “That’s a shame. Someone from Eden as the Minister of Foreign Affairs? Way to make it obvious that Eden wants to take over our land.”

“Well, a secret for a secret. Our deal is sealed,” you winked before getting up. “Enjoy the rest of your tea, Officer.”

You smiled to yourself- you had played this one well. Of course, the Prince’s Right Hand was loyal to the Prince. No lies there- but it really was the Prince himself that this ‘concerned’ officer should be worried about. It still looked like most of the court was unaware of the schemes cooking in the palace. And then there was the matter of the head post of the department of Foreign Affairs-

Oh, how you had resisted the urge to tell the officer that it was your own father who wanted that post. You couldn’t help but think about ways to mess up your father and his little mission to become the Minister of Foreign Affairs here- the audacity-

The bell at the door indicated the arrival of a person and you shook your head, ridding it off the schemes, looking ahead at the man who had a rather big suitcase with him. You smiled at him as you opened the register. “It looks like you’ll be staying here for a long time, Mr…”

“Choi. Choi Jongho,” his voice was low and he looked around. 

“Choi Jongho,” you repeated, writing his name. “Room no. 1117 is free. May I ask the duration of your stay?”

“Might be a day, might be… longer,” he smiled politely and you nodded, almost narrowing your eyes- you had definitely seen this face before. “Can I have dinner before I settle in my room?”

“Of course, I’ll get you a table in the corner, if you prefer,” you sighed at the loud group of people that were occupying the centre of the hall to your right. “You must be tired after all the travelling.”

He only nodded in response and you called for a maid, muttering your orders and asking one of the porters to transport Mr. Choi’s bags to his room. The maid accompanied the man to the corner and you finished writing his entry, pausing when you realised just where you had seen him-

In Eden. With your father.

Had he sent this man on business? If he had, he would never have stayed here- you and your father were worse than enemies when it came to business. Perhaps he had sent him to spy on you.

A devilish smile creeped up your cheeks as you shut the register and took a peek at Choi Jongho, who was ordering his food. As soon as he was done, he met eyes with you and you were surprised that he didn’t immediately look away like any other man would have. 

You didn’t exactly know who he was- you had only seen him once, perhaps twice, in your father’s office in Eden. Perhaps he didn’t know you as well and this was a huge coincidence on his part, but you couldn’t sleep tonight without knowing the truth. So you waited until he was done with his dinner and before he could get up without tea, you took the liberty of sitting down across from him with a cryptic smile. 

“Tea is on the house- unless you’d prefer another drink.”

“That’s very kind of you,” he raised a brow, shaking his dark bangs away from his face. “Madame… Lee, is it?”

“The one and only,” you scoffed. “How’s Mr. Lee doing? I hope Eden has worn him down more than he’d like.” 

The way Mr. Choi paused and shook his head, told you that your suspicions were right. You scoffed in disappointment. “What are you, his spy? He must be growing anxious back there since my business is booming.”

“Not a spy,” he told you and waited as the waitress arrived with tea. Once she was gone and you had taken a sip and he was done scanning you, he began. “How did you know it was me?”

“I don’t forget a face, Mr. Choi,” you said and he whistled. “Especially one I’ve seen near my father.”

“He has some… other plans.” When you only raised your brows as an indication that you were waiting, he sighed. “I understand that you had an… accident recently in one of your dealings? I don’t know exactly what you do, but your father thinks it’s best that you hire yourself a bodyguard- nothing too fancy, just a shadow.”

“Interesting that he would suggest so, since he’s the one who cares the least for me,” you narrowed your eyes at him. “Mr. Choi Jongho, I’ll deal with any ‘accidents’ I have myself. You can return and inform my father of that- I don’t require a bodyguard.”

“Maybe we should talk privately,” Jongho noticed the maids at the other corner. “You have a lot of eyes on you.”

You took a deep breath, willing the anger roiling in your stomach to calm down and nodded. “You can come to my room at the strike of midnight. When you go to your room, make sure you don’t unpack- I have a feeling you’ll be taking the next train back home.”

Before hearing what Jongho had to say, you were back to your desk and Jongho scoffed to himself- you were a handful, just like your father had described. Haughty, spoiled, and more- you were proving your father correct. He noticed the permanent smile you wore even as you worked and he wondered if you never got tired- but then again, people like you lived off the gossip that travelled around here.

A gossip dealer, Mr. Lee had explained to Jongho, not going into the details. Gossip, he explained, was a two-edged sword. It could cut the wielder if dealt with unprofessionally. But as Jongho looked around at the hotel that even your father admitted was a pretty successful venture, Jongho had to admit perhaps you did have the brains after all. This place couldn’t run without a good head.

Jongho never went to his room, opting to wait right where he had been sitting, reading the paper and catching up to the news. At the strike of the clock, he found you staring at him and with a tug of your head, he was up and following you to the room on the first floor, at the very end- a suite. He watched you turn the keys and open the room, allowing him to enter first before you shut it behind you and turned the lights on. 

“Please, take a seat,” you said and Jongho understood what you meant- stop stalking around. Jongho passed a nearly devilish smirk before he settled down, noticing the sword. “How long have you practised?”

You were surprised that he didn’t dismiss the sword as a mere decoration- or perhaps, your father had told him. What you didn’t realise was that he noticed the blade looked like it had been sharpened and the hilt wasn’t in top condition. “I’ve practised long enough. Now… shall we get back to business?”

“Look, Madame,” Jongho turned his full attention to you. “Things between Eden and Mist Island are going to get rough- this is me speaking, not your father. You need a bodyguard, especially with the job you do-”

“And what, exactly, is my job?” You crossed your legs, smirking. “I’m interested in hearing what Mr. Lee told you about my job.”

Jongho licked his lips, finding it difficult not to groan at your displeasing behaviour. “Gossip-dealer?”

You couldn’t help but scoff at that. “I understand why I should hire a bodyguard- I’ve had this thought for a while now. But tell me why it has to be you, who’ll most definitely be reporting my every move to my father.”

“Obviously your father knew that you’d be against the idea, but I’m patient and he must have thought I’d do a good job,” he relaxed back and you frowned in confusion. “He trusts me, and you can use it to your advantage if you wish. I have to find a few answers on this island as well. Maybe we can make a deal, think how it’s going to work for the both of us.”

You stared at him- he could pass as a local here. He didn’t look strange- plain dark hair, no unusual fashion sense. Everything about him screamed ‘normal’ which was going to be beneficial to you- this was probably a disguise and you could use someone who could pass away almost unnoticed in the crowd. Yet… there was this unmistakable air of mystery to him. Just what answers was he searching for that he was risking his life to become your bodyguard? He had to know just how many people targeted your head on a daily basis, didn’t he? You asked him that and he let you know that he was fully aware of the risk.

“Let’s hear what you have to offer then,” you studied him. “If I don’t agree, we can part ways right here.”

Jongho smiled as he nodded. “I’ll let you choose what exactly I report to your father- you have to give me something so he doesn’t get suspicious. He has other spies here anyway so we should act cautiously.”

“Other spies, huh?” You scoffed- you knew you weren’t paranoid when you felt like someone was watching you at the most random times. “What makes you think he won’t find out about our little deal? He’ll make you regret ever betraying him because you sound like someone he trusts enough, yet here you are, relaxed as you plan to betray him.”

“I think you’re a good actor,” he smirked and you snorted. “And so am I. I don’t see the problem if we’re agreeing on these conditions. I won’t betray you if you don’t interfere in whatever I’ve come here to do- nothing political unlike your field of work, I promise.”

“I think we can work with that. You’re right- he’s going to find out sooner or later anyway. He’s more sensitive now that he’s planning to return here on an official post, isn’t he?”

“You’re quick,” he clapped. “In return… I might need your help a little- not now, maybe later, but there is some digging I have to do and I’d like to keep it a secret- especially from Mr. Lee.”

“I hope it’s something that brings him down- then I can help you with that,” you smiled innocently and he chuckled at that. 

“You two really don’t get along, do you?” He shook his head. “So? Do we have a deal?”

“I have a few… conditions. You’ll refer to me as Madame and you will stay a respectable distance from me- especially when I’m ‘dealing’ with someone,” you began and he nodded. “The minute I learn that you’re betraying me in any way, you’re done for. I may not have a bodyguard but I have enough protection to save me from attempts like these.”

“Understood,” he shrugged- it wasn’t much you were asking for. 

“Then we have a deal. And make no mistake- I do not trust you. I still think you’re going to be reporting my every move to Mr. Lee. However, I won’t interfere in whatever you’ve come here to do… for now.” 

Jongho gaped at you as you got up and went for your room, dismissing him with a rather casual wave of hand. He sighed- just when he thought he had you. “You’re going to be so difficult to deal with.”

“I aim to please,” you said before shutting the door to your room and taking off your accessories, letting your hair loose before walking to the bath.

The bath had long gone cold.

—----------------------

Having Jongho as a bodyguard was proving to be… difficult, to put it simply. 

He wasn’t being a bother, not at all. He wanted eyes on you at all times when you were not in your room, and since you were mostly behind the counter or with the customers, all you needed to do was let Jongho go unnoticed as he seated himself in the corner on a chair with newspaper and an endless refill of coffee or tea- whatever he’d feel like. 

However, you did not like being watched even though it was necessary. It was just him making you aware of his presence time and time again that irked you. Stealing ‘casual’ glances whenever someone official he recognised entered, smirking when he’d catch you making a deal… a mere bodyguard should remain invisible to you. That’s what you told him in your evening break.

“Well, I’m not a ‘mere’ bodyguard, it seems,” Jongho shifted. “What exactly did I do?”

“You couldn’t have made it less obvious that you’re keeping an eye on me,” your face was emotionless so that anyone else watching wouldn’t catch on. “I get that it’s new for you but can you wipe that permanent smirk off your face whenever I’m dealing?”

Jongho laughed heartily at that. “Is that how it seemed? I’m pretty sure I had no such expressions on my face.”

“You don’t even realise it, do you?” You tsk-ed at him, fixing your midnight-blue sleeves before pointing at the left corner of your lip. “This gets lifted up like this, ever so slightly. It’s annoying.”

It lifted up again as a smirk creeped up his face. “Does it now? I’ll hide my face behind the newspaper then-”

“That’s worse,” you shook your head. “If you don’t improve by tonight I’m sending you back home, with a message to my dear old father that he can do better than this.”

“Go ahead,” Jongho, unfazed, went back to reading his newspaper that you were sure he had memorised by now. “I’m his best.”

“So arrogant,” you muttered, scanning him as you pondered your decision. “Just try to make it less obvious. We’ll deal with this later.”

Jongho, however, didn’t improve even slightly. You were just glad your customers weren’t noticing, and by the end of the night, you thought that perhaps, he did blend in. Since your staff was aware of him now and he could go inside and outside as he pleased, you supposed no outsider noticed him… for now.

And tonight, you needed to see just how good he was as a ‘bodyguard’. You were meeting with someone whose identity was better left hidden, though you were sure at least your father was aware of your dealings with the younger prince’s little gang of misfits. Even if he wasn’t, it was a little test for your bodyguard- if after this meeting, your father finds out whose side you are actually on, he would take swift action. 

Before every meeting, it was your strategy to think of every possible outcome and plan according to it. Tonight, you were meeting Park Seonghwa- Prince Hongjoong’s Right Hand, had he been allowed to have one officially. It was sad how the king and the elder prince had pushed the wiser one of their family out of the picture. What made you giddy with satisfaction, though, was that the younger prince was no fool at all. He was one of the smartest individuals you had ever had the chance to encounter, and you were sure he would one day take his position at the very throne he deserved to rule. Not his elder brother Prince Woobin, but him.

People suspected that you were in cohorts with the younger prince, but only to the extent that you provided him with the ‘gossip’. Thankfully, the reputation you had built for yourself preceded you. As it was a public fact that the younger prince had negligible power in the matter of the courts, no one cared. The only person who would care was your father, who had learned the hard way that everything you did had a purpose. 

“How am I supposed to protect you if I don’t even know who we’re meeting?” Jongho muttered, casually walking by your side even when you had instructed him to act like a bodyguard and stay a few steps behind you. 

“Who I meet is none of your concern, and you won’t be reporting this to Mr. Lee,” you gave him half a smile, observing your surroundings as the two of you walked through the very empty night streets. “We’re almost there- stay hidden while I talk. This man is not the threat tonight, so keep your eyes and ears open.”

With that, you stood at the corner of the street and tapped in a rhythmic beat thrice- a signal to him that you were not alone but safe. Out of the shadows, the tall figure of Seonghwa appeared, face masked and hidden further with the hat tilted all the way down. 

“One would think you’d walk right into a trap if all you can see in front of you is your goddamned hat,” you said and he let out a low chuckle as he slid his mask down and tilted his hat up. 

“My apologies, though I must ask who exactly that man is,” he pointed at Jongho who waved at him with a rather innocent smile.

“My ‘guard’, if you can believe that. Long story, perhaps for another time. How does the captain fare?”

The captain- what you called Prince Hongjoong in public. Seonghwa nodded, and that was enough of an answer. You continued, “My earlier suspicions were right. The Prince’s Right Hand is very loyal to the Prince, but now there’s another group we ought to worry about. The Minister of Defence is keeping tabs on everyone, and possibly you as well. Also, it is in discussion whether the new Minister of Foreign Affairs should be someone from Eden. I’m pretty sure Mr. Lee is on board for that position.”

Seonghwa raised his brow at that last piece of information. He knew Mr. Lee was your father, and the fact that you were telling him this… “And would Mr. Lee make a good minister?”

“If you wish to make Mist Island and Eden one again through bloody means, then yes. He would make a very good minister.”

“And how should we stop this from happening?”

“Find out who is actually behind this, and what Mr. Lee holds that grants him immunity as he tramples all over Mist Island.”

“On it.” Seonghwa tipped his hat and disappeared back into the shadows, and you clicked your fingers and resumed walking as if you had never stopped in the first place. 

“That was quick. Where are we going now?”

“To the place that I once called home,” you scoffed and Jongho raised his brows. 

Taking a few turns, you finally reached the house that you had grown up in. As you unlocked the main door and entered what was an average house, much like the other on the street, the damp smell and dust greeted you, making you take a step back. You would never get used to the house smelling like a memory long forgotten. Perhaps, you too were scared of opening the treasure box of memories and letting out the warmth of your mother’s arms. The house was not home after your mother left and never came back, presumed dead.

The truth was that you wished your mother was still out there somewhere, far away even, but safe. Alive. Living the life she wished she had, the one she always sketched in the bedtime stories she told you. 

“Looks like you haven’t been here in a long time,” Jongho’s voice brought you back from your reminiscing and you turned to look at him swat at a spiderweb. “Is this Mr. Lee’s residence?”

“He doesn’t use it much, but I assume he’ll be needing it soon- until and unless he arranges for something better. And me being the docile daughter, I thought I’d surprise him by letting him know that I was aware he would be arriving here,” you smirked, putting your hands on your hips as you surveyed the area. “Better get this place cleaned out tomorrow, don’t you think?”

Jongho looked confused- often, the lines of sarcasm and blunt truth were mixed with you. “Why don’t the two of you don’t get along, if I dare ask?”

“A number of reasons, each worse than the other,” you went for your father’s study, unlocking the room with the set of keys you had one of your men steal and make a copy of without his knowledge. “None that should entertain you much. Would you like to make a survey of your boss’ study? I’m sure you’ll find something of interest there.”

You didn’t miss how Jongho’s eyes flashed- so you were right. Jongho must be trying to look into Mr. Lee’s private life, which meant he must be trying to find out something about his close circle or whatever people he had been dealing with in the past. Jongho narrowed his eyes. “And what should I be looking for?”

“Whatever answers you were wishing you would find on this island. Perhaps you will find something if you’re lucky. I’ll be in the room upstairs when you’re done.”

With that, you left him in your father’s study- an act of faith in him so he could feel that you trusted him to some extent. You wanted him to loosen his guard so you could find out just what ‘answers’ he was desperate enough to look for- desperate enough to be a bodyguard for someone like you. You knew one thing about your father and it was that he wouldn’t force anyone to protect you, which meant Jongho had to have accepted rather willingly. Maybe to your father, that was an act of loyalty, but you suspected otherwise- and you had to, to remain safe.

You entered what had once been your room, now barely a fragment of who you used to be as a child. You did what you had to first- check the floor for that one odd sound and lifted that plank, taking out a box and unlocking it with the key only you and your mother possessed- no one else knew this box existed. It was a little secret communication device between you two while she was alive, and you hoped one day she would communicate with you through this as well. It has been almost a decade now since she went missing, but you used to come monthly here until you started coming less as you started losing hope (or hoping she wasn’t going to use this to communicate with you but another means). 

The letter you found was the same one you had left around six months ago. You replaced it with a new letter and shut the box back, making sure nothing seemed out of place before going to the window and looking out at the half moon. 

With every passing day, your suspicions that your own father had something to do with your mother not coming back without a word grew. Your hatred for your father grew along, especially when he morphed into an ambitious, selfish and wealth-greedy man. You just wished you’d get news if your mother was dead- even that would be a relief than not being aware what state she was in. at least you could mourn her then. 

Jongho hadn’t intended to sneak up the stairs but somehow, despite your good ears, you didn’t sense him with his hand raised to knock at the door- he paused, realising this was the first time in the past three days he saw you with your guard down. Candid. Your shoulders weren’t straight anymore, instead looked burdened. Your head was down with some worry that loomed over you, your mouth breathing sighs. Before you could turn, Jongho knocked on the door, startling you a bit.

“We can go now if you’re done,” he scanned you, feeling a little awkward.

“And? Did you find what you were looking for?” You asked as you followed him downstairs.

“Not exactly,” he sighed. “It’s going to be hard to find what would be a well-hidden secret if it exists in the first place, wouldn’t it?”

You paused- you hadn’t expected that. Jongho raised a brow and you smiled. “It looks like we’re in the same boat, even though our quests must be different.” He made a funny face at that and you locked the main door behind you as you exited. “Did you at least find something of interest?”

“Maybe I did.”The glint in his eyes confirmed that and you smiled in satisfaction. It looked like tonight wasn’t a waste afterall. 

—---------------------

Whether you would like to admit it or not, you were gradually getting used to the idea of having Jongho as your shadow. Especially when he was proving to be useful in several ways. As a bodyguard, he was doing an exceptional job. Since the relations between Mist Island and Eden were getting rockier with each passing day, making the citizens feel on edge, many of your customers who came to trade secrets with you tried to get aggressive. Earlier, you would handle the situation by either breaking a plate over their head or splashing whatever was in front of you on their face- whether it be hot tea or cool water. But now? As soon as someone so much as raised their voice over you, Jongho, who was preferring to seat himself as close to you as possible whenever you did your job, would casually start cleaning his gun or cracking his knuckles with a glare in their direction.

At first, you were pissed. You thought he was interfering, but when one of them ignored Jongho’s not-so-subtle warning and tried to twist your wrist when you annoyed him, Jongho ended up twisting the offender’s wrist so hard you were positive you heard the snap of bones. After that, word must have gotten out. Everyone who met with you was more careful.

Apart from his bodyguard duties, Jongho was also quite an entertainer, you were finding. He was good at making you smile, and your staff was the first to notice, since they could differentiate between your trademark smile and real smile. Jongho probably did not, and you were glad that was the case. You didn’t want him to think his dad jokes were funny- it could get in his head. Not that he would care- you found out it was his lifelong habit. But since Jongho was good at talking and also good at annoying people, you decided to teach him a trick or two about your job.

“We don’t know how long we are doing this,” you told him, fixing the collar of your periwinkle gown before you looked at him, peeking behind him to see that the customer/target was already seated in the hall. “So maybe you should join me. Maybe you could do some work in my stead when I ask you too.”

“I don’t know if I’ll be good at this though,” Jongho sighed, running a hand through his dark hair. “You’re an expert. I’ll make a fool of myself.”

“You won’t,” you insisted, almost glaring at him. “You already know too much, don’t you? When you have too much information, you need to let it out through different channels.”

“And what’s that channel today?” Jongho looked towards the hall where all sorts of people were present- nobles, soldiers, foreigners, gangsters. 

“It’s a test. You have to figure out who he is,” you winked at him and he groaned. You only fixed the collar of his black shirt, ignoring how he tensed under your touch, before beckoning him to follow you, seating yourselves in front of the middle aged man who wore such plain clothes that it was impossible to tell if he was a noble or a peasant. But peasants didn’t come here, and he didn’t look from a noble family, Jongho thought.

“I hope you’ve been well,” you said as you poured tea for him, sliding the tray of cookies as well and he thanked you awkwardly. “How’s your family?”

“The same, but the youngest almost caught a cold,” he replied and you raised your brows.

“I hope he’s okay now?”

“He’s still at the… hospital. Not here, though.”

“Is someone with him?” You continued pouring tea for Jongho who had a sympathetic look on his face as he listened to the man’s story.

“He’s all alone, we couldn’t join him. But we wish to, when the time is right, when the matters are solved,” the man sipped his tea, rubbing a hand over his hairy face as he sighed. “It’s hard to travel these days, and we don’t have enough money to pay the doctor.”

“And you came here for my help?” You asked and he nodded. You took a moment to think.

“Maybe I ought to look at my connections or acquaintances for a reference?” You asked.

“I was thinking about the Minister of Defence. He seems to be an acquaintance of the doctors there.”

“Ah,” you nodded, glancing at Jongho to see how he was following the cryptic conversation. “I’ll ask someone to give my message to him then. Maybe he could put in a good word with your doctor after all.”

“Thank you, Madame Lee,” the man got up and bowed and you followed. “Even if he doesn’t help… thank you.”

You only nodded, watching the man leave with another bow in your direction after which you slumped down, munching on a chocolate cookie as you went over your conversation again. You noticed Jongho staring at you and you cleared your throat. “Well? Who do you suppose he was?”

“I would say an acquaintance, but I have never seen him around Mr. Lee or you, for that matter,” he began. “He doesn’t look like he’s from a noble family, and he doesn’t look very rich either, and frankly, your hotel is expensive. What was he really doing here, huh?”

“What was he really doing here?” You repeated, stifling your smirk. 

“I’m just guessing you talked in code words. There’s no patient, no doctor,” he took another cookie as he waited for your response.

“You’re both wrong and right. There is, in fact, a patient, and a doctor, though not quite in the literal sense. He’s a spy, one of his men has been caught by the enemy, and he wants me to do something about it- like either make a deal or force the Minister of Defence to release him.”

“Ah…” Jongho nodded enthusiastically. “It makes sense. But… who’s the enemy here?”

“Who’s the enemy?” You asked him. “I thought by now, you would have realised there’s no such thing as a single enemy. There are several sides. Whichever you choose to stick with, the rest you call your enemy.”

“And which side is yours, Madame Lee?” He asked in a playful tone.

“Not the one Mr. Lee chooses,” you said with a grin and found him grinning back. “You know, something tells me you don’t like Mr. Lee much either.”

“Don’t get me wrong, that man practically raised me,” Jongho brushed his clothes, having finished snacking. “It’s just… he’s a bit difficult, and he keeps a lot of secrets. He’s cryptic. Even as one of his closest personnel, he’s kept me at quite a distance.”

“When do you think he’s arriving?” You remembered discussing with Jongho a few days ago about the possibility of your father arriving on the island quite soon. “It’s going to get noisy here.”

“Should I casually ask? Or would he know it’s not really me who’s asking?” He scoffed at the thought.

“I have my sources, and they say he’s begun packing,” you teased.

“Well then,” Jongho straightened. “If you’re on the side against your father, and you’re both getting involved politically… do you think he would ever hurt you?”

“Do you think he’s never hurt me?” You asked, failing to keep the edge from your tone. Jongho noticed that. With a sigh, you said, “He’ll do anything to get what he wants. He’ll trample on anyone. It doesn’t matter who that is. But Jongho… once he arrives, you’re either my bodyguard or his man. Would you be able to protect me if it’s my father who decides to hurt me?”

Jongho’s mouth fell open as he considered this possibility and you left for the reception counter, leaving him wondering just why he had agreed to become your bodyguard when you were your father’s worst enemy.

—--------------------

Your father came earlier than you expected, but that was both good and bad, although the bad seemed to be outweighing the good for now. 

The island had been in a frenzy for the past three days, ever since your father proudly marched to the island, making a clear and loud statement- that Eden was not fooling around. Arriving on ships that included battalions, the man marched with an army to his hometown, and to everyone’s surprise, he and his soldiers were welcomed by the palace.

However, that day, you had an appointment with Prince Hongjoong himself, and he had specifically instructed you to make a public entrance to the palace. You had dressed in your finest gown of deep ruby, your hair tied back in an elegant bun, a black hat that complemented your dress well on top of your head. The ruby necklace was the only jewellery you wore apart from its matching ring for such occasions. You had instructed Jongho to dress his finest as well, and you weren’t surprised when he arrived at your door in a three piece suit, his hair swept back, though your heart sank suspiciously.

However, he had to pause and take a good look at you, drinking in everything he could see. He couldn’t figure out just what it was about you that made you awfully attractive to him- perhaps the way you carried yourself, strong and unwavering. Or perhaps the playful smile you always had on your face, the teasing eyes-

Or maybe because he thought you were simply beautiful.

“Good,” you nodded, taking a deep breath. “You look good.”

“You look good,” he simply said. “Shall we?”

You took his arm that he offered and together, you rode in the carriage sent by Seonghwa. On the way, you briefed Jongho about the actual plan.

“We’re making a statement, dear old guard,” you took off your hat before you rested your head. “We go through the main gate, encounter my father- a total ‘coincidence’, exchange greetings- you exchange greetings, I’ll piss him off. And then, we walk to Prince Hongjoong’s chambers while they watch.”

“Wow, okay, could have let me know earlier,” Jongho mumbled. “Wait- I’m meeting Prince Hongjoong too?” 

When your smirk was the only response he got, he groaned loudly, shaking his head in what appeared to be mild annoyance and amusement. “What will I be doing there? I’m sure you don’t need a bodyguard in the Prince’s chambers unless you think he’s a threat.”

“Maybe I just wanted you to tag along,” you challenged and he raised his brow, making your heart lurch again. What was wrong with you? “You’re right, I don’t need a bodyguard today. If you don’t wish to tag along… you are free to go back. I won’t mind.”

Jongho thought for a moment before he shook his head. “I’d like to tag along, actually.”

The two of you shared a smile before you looked out of the window. Something about him today was different. Or maybe you were just feeling strange as you got to know the different sides of him. But you didn’t mind his presence at all now, and coming from you in such a short period of time, in mere weeks? That was new and a little insane, especially considering he might still be reporting other things to your father. 

It was a little suspicious that he actually wasn’t. Not so far anyway, since everything was calm. Or maybe this was the calm before the storm- maybe he was waiting to gain your trust fully before he would pull such a stunt. But you were also cautious- you only showed him what wouldn’t hurt you if it got out. And perhaps he knew that, perhaps he didn’t, but you couldn’t be more careful. As you thought about all of this, playing with your necklace, Jongho cleared his throat and you glanced at him.

“Should I… I don’t know, act surprised when I see Mr. Lee in the palace?”

You considered him for a moment. “You know… you don’t have to keep putting an act in front of him anymore.”

Jongho bit his lip- you were very quick and perhaps this was your instinct now. “I think I need to. For now.”

You made an impressed face. “If it would help you for now, go ahead. It’s up to you, really.”

“I don’t think he would like it very much if he learns we’re a team now,” Jongho was grinning guiltily.

You shifted, appearing interested. “Are we then? A team?”

“Aren’t we?” He challenged with a raise of his brow. 

“I don’t know,” you shrugged, a teasing glint in your eyes. “All you’ve done is help me so far. I haven’t really helped you back, have I?”

Maybe Jongho wasn’t expecting that, which was why he gaped at you. You waved a hand in dismissal. “If you need some help, I can give it to you for free, in return for all you’ve done.”

“I’ll keep that in mind,” he promised and you reached the palace. Setting your hat back on your head, you exited the carriage, looking around at the vast expanse that led to the residence of the King, the cherry blossoms in full bloom bordering the path. You noticed Seonghwa, dressed in formal palace clothing, marching towards you and you passed him a subtle nod. Jongho narrowed his eyes.

“Is that…?”

“Shh,” you playfully put a finger on your lips. “What gave?”

“His arrogant walk?” Jongho suggested and you almost snorted as you turned back to Seonghwa, who bowed once. 

“Madame Lee. It’s been a while,” he said, looking at Jongho then, passing an acknowledging nod.

“Mr. Park,” you said. “I hope you’ve met with Mr. Lee?”

“He’ll be leaving Prince Woobin’s chambers in a moment. We might encounter him on our way to Prince Hongjoong’s chambers.”

“We better,” you whispered with a wink and Seonghwa nudged at you to follow him. You made Jongho walk beside you and as you took the turn to the direction of the princes chambers, you noticed a few men bowing as the exit the chamber, and noticed the man in the front-

Your father. You weren’t expecting the shudder that passed through you at the sight of that man who seemed to look the same ever since you were a teen- the same wrinkles on his face, the same arrogance around his mouth and eyes, the same stiffness in his shoulders. You continued walking, pausing only when your father met your eyes and almost dismissed you as a stranger until he saw another familiar face beside you and looked back at you.

And when he roared with laughter at the ‘coincidence’, you didn’t hide your wince at the annoying sound. “The person I last expected to see!” He shook his head, looking at his fellows. “You’d call it a coincidence, but I would call it fate.”

You smiled at that as you bowed to him, Jongho following suit as he greeted your father as well. “Have you been well?”

“In front of you, alive and healthy,” he boasted. “I hope you’re not giving my Jongho a hard time.”

“Should I not?” You glanced towards Jongho who wore no expression on his face. 

“Didn’t he tell you who he was?” Mr. Lee looked confused. 

“He just told me he was your ‘best’,” you rolled your eyes and he chuckled at that and Jongho finally gave in, groaning.

“He wasn’t wrong,” Mr. Lee nodded at Jongho. “I guess you don’t remember the Choi family. After all, you were too young when they passed away, unfortunately.”

You glanced at Jongho again and noticed that he was clearly not comfortable with your father mentioning the incident. “I’m not sure I remember, yes. Anyways, I must leave now- I have an appointment with the Prince here. Don’t expect me to catch up with you later, and I’d prefer if you stay away from my business, unless you have news worthy of my attention.”

Without hearing his answer, you nudged Seonghwa to lead the way again, and the sound of your father laughing sarcastically gradually faded. You entered the chambers and then the office, where the Prince sat behind his desk in a fancy hanbok.

With a deep bow and greetings exchanged, the four of you sat casually and the Prince served tea as he inquired of your health and business. 

“And who is this acquaintance of yours?”

“Choi Jongho,” Jongho answered, “I work for Madame Lee.”

“Do you?” the Prince asked and you and Seonghwa looked at each other in amusement. “I heard he worked for Mr. Lee. And anyone who works for Mr. Lee… I don’t think I’d like to interact with them very much.”

Jongho looked at you, confused before the Prince laughed, shaking his head, his dark hair messy. “I only jest, relax. I didn’t lie though.”

Jongho did relax then. “It’s true, I worked for Mr. Lee before I came here to work for Madame Lee. I’m not sure where I stand right now.”

“And do you trust him?” Prince Hongjoong looked at you.

“Respectfully, I trust nobody- not even you, Your Highness,” you gave him a subtle bow of apology and Seonghwa and the Prince both shared a grin at that. “You can’t ask me if I trust him.”

“Fair enough. Shall we get to business?”

You nodded and Seonghwa cleared his throat. “Mr. Lee just met with Prince Woobin- since he’s making clear whose side he is on, I think we don’t need to hide anymore. It’s going to get bloody here pretty soon anyway. And now Mr. Lee must know whose side you are on, Madame Lee.”

“It’s necessary that he knows,” you nodded and the Prince agreed. “And when he stays on his toes, that’s when it’s the easiest to catch him in my trap. You see… My father has a habit of being a bit too careful. I intend to exploit that weakness of his.”

“Would you like to give him a heads-up that you’re catching on?” The Prince rested his head on his hand, elbow propped lazily on the table. “I don’t think he’s the type of person to stop after becoming the Minister of Foreign Affairs, which he surely will- he just secured his position with Prince Woobin.”

“You’re right about that,” you nodded. “He’s after something- I’m not sure what yet, but something that will give him a reason to annex Mist Island- Eden’s prince is funding this operation, I’m sure.”

“Something that will be big enough to provide a reason…” Seonghwa pondered. “Whatever it is, who could possess such a thing? Prince Woobin would never keep it in his residence.”

“Anyone the Prince trusts?”

“Maybe you should look out of the picture too,” Jongho said and everyone turned to look at him. He shrugged. “Isn’t the Minister of Defence very suspicious too? He’s keeping tabs on you all, he must have a reason to do so other than simply being too interested in your lives.”

You nodded, feeling a little proud for a moment. “He’s right. I think we should start there- he’s been out catching your spies too, Seonghwa.”

“I took care of that,” he assured and Jongho sighed in realisation. “What do you think we’re looking for here? Physical evidence of some illegal movement occuring in the court?”

“That’s our best bet,” you nodded. 

“Thanks for making time today. We’ll let you know how to proceed forward- keep your eyes and ears open… both of you,” the Prince looked at Jongho and he nodded.

As Seonghwa accompanied you both to the palace gates, you paused before you could exit. “Have you heard any news about my mother?”

“Not yet,” Seonghwa shook his head in disappointment. “I can’t seem to find a lead, and that’s more suspicious.”

You nodded, thanking him. The carriage ride back to the hotel was rather quiet as the two of you sorted your thoughts out. However, that night, after you clocked out, a knock sounded on your door and you found none other than Jongho at your doorstep. You let him in and resumed cleaning your swords. “What’s keeping you up tonight?”

“Many things,” Jongho admitted. “But first of all, why are you obsessed with your swords?”

“Maybe I just like the idea of a neat and clean blade slicing through someone’s throat?” You suggested.

“I still can’t wrap my head around the fact that you actually know how to use them,” Jongho snorted. “I thought you were a spoiled brat who only cared about her business and how she looked.”

“You weren’t wrong, but has your presumption about me changed yet?” You scoffed.

“I now think that you are a spoiled brat who only cares about her business and how she looks- and her swords.”

You couldn’t help but laugh at that, and Jongho felt pleased- that was the first time he heard you genuinely laugh. “You can’t blame me for being obsessed with these beauties.”

“Anyways… What should I tell your father about today’s meeting if he asks? Because I’m sure I’ll get cornered by one of his men pretty soon.”

“What would you say?” You asked, waiting for his response and he nervously fidgeted.

“That you’re obviously on Prince Hongjoong’s side, and are planning to find out why he wants to become the Minister of Foreign Affairs, but you have no idea what to look for?”

“You’re getting good at this,” you smirked. “My influence is clearly rubbing off on you, I see.”

“Bound to happen when I’m with you basically all hours of the day,” Jongho rolled his eyes.

You finished cleaning the last sword and started packing them in their cases. “Do you think I’m doing the right thing, Jongho?”

“I… actually don’t really know what exactly you are doing,” Jongho sighed. “You seem to be doing the right thing but there’s a lot of mystery still surrounding you, and honestly I cannot make a judgement right now.”

You nodded, finally meeting eyes with him. “Why did my father raise you?”

Jongho pursed his lips. “My father was apparently close to your father.”

“When did they pass away?” You asked.

“I don’t recall many moments of them… I think I was four,” Jongho answered. 

“But why would my father raise you?” You tilted your head. “He couldn’t even raise me right. He’s no philanthropist.”

“I don’t know,” Jongho was being honest, and you heard what he didn’t say out loud- I intend to find out. “Where is your mother?”

“I don’t know,” you replied, and Jongho could hear the honesty in that statement too. “I don’t even know if she’s alive or dead. Last I saw of her was when she left for Eden almost a decade ago.”

“Was that before or after your father had his shoulder surgery?” Jongho asked and you frowned. “Because she was there before that, in the house. I was there too. I heard that she left for Mist Island- I remember because your father said he wished his wife was there to take care of him when he was ill.”

You felt blood rush to your head- why did your father conceal this fact for you? All the decades spent sending people to find your mother in Eden, when she was supposed to be right here? Jongho noticed your clenched jaw and paling face. “Did you… think she was in Eden?”

“Are you sure?” Your voice was steel and gaze fiery. When Jongho nodded, you took a deep breath. 

What other secrets about your mother was your father keeping from you? How would you confront him about this- or rather, would you ever?

“Thank you for telling me that, Jongho,” your voice was still the same- unwavering. “You can leave now- it’s late.”

Jongho nodded, getting up and about to go to the food but then he paused. “If you want… I could help you look for your mother-”

“You will do no such thing,” you almost spat it out and Jongho frowned. “Did my father order you to tell me that?”

Jongho scanned you in confusion for a moment and then scoffed loudly. “I can’t believe this. I just thought I could help and you think it’s not me but your father speaking? I’m disappointed in you… y/n.”

You bit the inside of your cheek as the two of you glared at each other. “How can I trust you when I don’t even know who you are?”

“I don’t know who you are either,” Jongho challenged. “Yet here I am, betraying my boss for you. I should have thought twice,” he said and left the room, leaving your cheeks burning with shame at what you had actually done.

You supposed Jongho was right- he was actively betraying the man who had raised him for you. Maybe more because of whatever he had come here to find but perhaps because one day, he could use your help too. And what had you given him in return? Disappointment. 

You decided to reconsider whether you really needed Jongho as a bodyguard… or as a person you could keep close and confide in. A partner. 

It didn’t sound so bad. 

—---------------------

You found out Jongho could be pretty sulky too when he got angry with someone- or maybe with you, he was being dramatic. 

As you went to sit at the counter with Sakura, you noticed Jongho was already having tea in his usual spot while he read the newspaper. He only glanced at you once and didn’t meet eyes with you for the rest of the day. You were a bit amused, if you had to admit. Of course, you were going to apologise- you had been in the wrong- but you wanted to see the lengths to which Jongho could go consumed with his anger.

And the fact that he was usually somewhat rational, or maybe unaffected, by whatever you did? Or whatever stunt anyone else pulled, for that matter? You didn’t know whether to be worried or be amused, so you were feeling both. And the fact that you were worried was something you didn’t want to think about right now. 

You weren’t expecting any special guests at your hotel today- usually, whoever wanted to trade secrets sent a message in advance unless it was urgent. But the last thing you were expecting were a bunch of soldiers from Eden advancing into your hotel like they owned the damned place. They looked around as if expecting to see someone suspicious but upon finding no one and having alarmed everyone present, they settled at the bar corner. You sighed- you feared they might get drunk and create a mess. Soldiers from Eden generally had no morals- especially when it came to Mist Island.

Jongho also noticed how arrogant those men were but they recognised Jongho and the man who seemed to be their leader- a rather young soldier with an eyebrow slit- greeted Jongho with a bow and perhaps, asked what he was doing here. You couldn’t hear them but you saw Jongho dismiss him with a polite smile- he probably told him to mind his own business.

“Make sure they don’t create a scene,” you told Sakura and she nodded, pushing her glasses up her nose bridge before she went to whisper the orders to the rest of the staff. You had to take a little break to freshen up.

But while you were gone and the men had a few drinks, it got louder. By the time you returned, you noticed how most of the customers were annoyed and were trying to leave without attracting attention. You groaned, making a mental note to ask your father to keep his minions under control, but then you heard one of the men bark some orders to none other than Sakura who was passing by.

“Hey, you with the glasses! Where are my drinks? Why is your service so damned slow?”

“I apologise,” Sakura bowed. “I’ll check what’s taking so long.”

With a desperate glance at you, she went towards the kitchen and you met eyes with Jongho, noticing even he was annoyed. Still at the counter, you watched one of the maids set the tray on their table while they snickered and whispered things- probably commenting on her and trying to rile her up. Thankfully, she was a patient one, and after doing her job, she was about to leave when the supposed leader asked her where the woman with glasses was.

You watched Sakura frown as she made her way to the men and he started complaining about how she should have done better. You’d had enough- you started making your way towards the group but a loud shatter of glass breaking made everyone, including you, gasp.

“Why are you being like this?” The man was smirking devilishly as he grabbed Sakura’s wrist- the glass having fallen from the table as a result of her struggle. Before Jongho could get up, you raised a hand, indicating to him that you would handle it. Without waiting for his answer, you walked to the group and locked eyes with the leader.

“Is there a problem here?”

The man scanned you rather slowly with a smirk plastered on his face. “And who might you be?”

“The owner of this hotel. If you have a problem, you better discuss with me.”

“You? The owner?” The man scoffed and looked at his gang and everyone started roaring with laughter as if you had made a joke. “I guess you’re better than this one here. I was just looking for someone to… entertain us.”

One of the men on your left tried to grab your wrist. With your right hand, you snatched a plate from the table and smacked it across his head, shattering it in the process, and with your left hand, you produced a dagger from your pocket and swiped it across the leader’s hand that had been holding Sakura’s wrist. They roared with pain while you pointed the dagger at the leader’s neck, Sakura hiding behind you. Still, the leader managed to slice your arm with a table knife but you didn’t let the burning pain take over you, instead, you almost tried snatching the knife from his hand when Jongho interrupted and pointed the gun at the man’s head.

“Are you all fools, parading into the hotel of Mr. Lee’s daughter, creating a scene and hurting her?” Jongho roared with anger at the soldiers and saw the colour drain from their face when they made the connection- Jongho worked for Mr. Lee after all. The leader scoffed in disbelief, earning a smack from Jongho across his face. “Wait till Mr. Lee hears about this- I’ll make sure none of you can ever step foot on this island.”

“We didn’t know!” One of the men yelled at him. You glared at him.

“You’re a guest on this land, sir. You should have acted like one.”

“Get lost before I lose it,” Jongho told them and they all grabbed their things before skittering away, glaring at Jongho this time instead of you. You rolled your eyes, turning to Sakura.

“Are you alright?”

“I’m sorry, Madame,” she bowed her head in shame. “I should have done better. I should have cooperated-”

“I didn’t train you to be weak. I trained you to stand up to whoever dares to oppress you. You should have done what I did- that’s my only disappointment from you,” you smiled at her, touching her face. “You did well.”

Sakura smiled warmly. “Let me clean this mess up, at least.”

You chuckled at that. “You do that.”

Jongho heard that conversation and sighed internally- he hadn’t expected you to be so stupidly brave. “You know… the situation could have been handled in many other ways.”

“Ah, yes,” you turned to him. “I could have slit his throat. I didn’t. Kind of regretting it right now.”

Jongho shook his head. “You should have let me handle it. I’m your bodyguard, and yet… you took the lead. And now you’re hurt,” he pointed at the bleeding arm, the blood trickling down your hand.

“I’ll take care of it- it’s no big deal-”

“Let me,” he said with a tone of finality and didn’t wait for your response as he made his way upstairs, pausing to make sure you were following. The two of you entered your room and he asked you where your first aid kit was.

“I can take care of it,” you said as he brought the kit to the table, making you sit at a chair and he dragged his chair in front of you. You tried rolling your sleeve, flinching- your favourite plum gown was beyond repair as blood had spread all over.

“Just shut up and let me do something,” he fiddled with the kit and you gaped at him.

“Dropping all formalities, are we?” You scoffed. You didn’t get an answer in return- he dipped cotton into alcohol and glanced at you once before rolling your sleeve upwards gently, examining the cut. You pouted- it wouldn’t need stitches but it was deeper than you thought.

Jongho cleaned your wound patiently, rubbed an ointment with a swab and even covered it in gauze and bandaged your arm neatly. After he was done, he was still holding your hand in his and he sighed. “I wish you hadn’t done anything and let me handle it.”

His voice was low and barely a whisper. You frowned, trying to figure out how to respond. “I… handled it alright, didn’t I?”

“You could have been more hurt,” he insisted, finally looking at you. “How many times have you encountered people like these? Do you realise what you do is so dangerous as well? How could you not have someone to protect you before I came?”

“I can protect myself,” you insisted. “I really can. I have, all my life. Now is no different.”

“Do you have to be so stubborn?” Jongho sighed. “Let’s forget about the past, but today… You should have let me handle it.”

You shrugged, aware of how he was still holding your hand- so unlike him. “I know- I just… old habits, I guess. And you weren’t in the best mood either, so…”

“You really think I would have let you get hurt just because we had an argument?” Jongho gaped at you.

“Well… that would have made you a lousy bodyguard then.”

Jongho smiled at that and you wondered why it relaxed you so much- that the tension in his shoulders was gone. “Does it hurt too much?”

“Uh,” you took your hand from him, bending it at different angles. “I’ll take something for the pain.”

Jongho relaxed back, watching you. You stared back, mustering your courage before you took a deep breath. “I’msorryforlastnightIwasrude.”

“What was that?” Jongho scoffed loud enough to annoy you.

“I said,” you enunciated each word perfectly this time. “I’m sorry for last night. I said some things and made some assumptions I shouldn’t have. I know it was wrong of me to do so.”

“That’s okay,” he replied. “I should have… I shouldn’t have suggested helping you. I’m only your bodyguard.”

“No,” you shook your head at that. “You’re much more than that. I took you for granted, it’s just… you have to understand how it is with my father. He’ll do anything to ruin me, which has made it so hard for me to trust anyone. To trust you. I’m trying to, but honestly, you haven’t given me anything.”

“I realise that,” Jongho nodded. “I also understand where you’re coming from. I trusted Mr. Lee for my whole life until I heard something I shouldn’t have and when the opportunity to come here arose, I had to take it. And I might need your help too.”

“Well,” you smiled at that. “I guess we can both help each other.”

“I guess,” he smiled back before sighing. “I don’t remember my parents much. I think you don’t either- our families were close, though. I have a picture- perhaps you recognise them,” he said and fished in his pocket for his wallet, where he had a picture of his parents with Mr. Lee. You nodded.

“I’ve heard my father talk about them when he reminisces about the old times.”

Jongho nodded. “This isn’t public information, but my parents were spies for the King. He used them to obtain information on Eden and other nations. I don’t know what the nature of their job was exactly, but from what Mr. Lee had told me they passed away during a mission- my father was caught by soldiers from Eden and my mother escaped with me. She handed me to your mother before going back for my father- the two never returned, and they were found dead a few days later.”

“That’s… unfortunate,” you frowned. “How old were you?”

“Four,” he said, leaning forward. “Which is why I don’t remember much. But a few years ago, I accidentally heard him talk to one of his closest men- a spy as well. I heard him asking whether he really had taken care of all the people who had witnessed my parents' death. That’s… suspicious, isn’t it?”

“It is,” you admitted. “Do you think he’s hiding something from you regarding the incident?”

“It’s just the way he talked… it felt like he, too, had witnessed it. And if he really has… that means he lied to me. What would he lie for? Were my parents traitors to their homeland, Mist Island? Did they really die because they got caught during a mission? It doesn’t make sense anymore, and I came here, hoping I’d find some answers without Mr. Lee’s knowledge.”

“I think your best bet is asking Mr. Lee himself or the person he talked to,” you pointed out. “My father doesn’t really keep physical evidence of things he’d like to hide.”

“That’s true,” he nodded slowly. “The man he talked to- he’s Mr. Ahn. You know him, right?”

“Mr. Ahn?” You frowned. “He’s his secretary, but… do you know what his real job is?”

“I don’t?” Jongho frowned in confusion as well.

“He’s an assassin. The best of the best. There’s a reason my father is still alive after all he dares to do,” you told him and Jongho groaned in disbelief. “Also… what happened after you were given to my mother? I don’t remember seeing you- I do have faint memories of playing with a kid that could have been you.”

“When your mother came the last time I saw her in Eden, she told me something. She said she wished she could have raised me. She also told me not to trust Mr. Lee and that everything that I thought was the truth was not. She told me I was being used- and then Mr. Lee interrupted and I never got to ask her what exactly she meant. I thought that wasn’t something new- all of us know we’re being used by Mr. Lee one way or another. We know not to trust him with our life. But the way she phrased it… I could never get it out of my head, though it started making sense later when I heard Mr. Lee’s conversation with Mr. Ahn.”

You let that sink in. “Did my father take you with him when he left for Eden? When you were… around six?”

“Yeah,” Jongho nodded. “I was raised in his house.”

“I’m still wondering why he would bother with you- he’s not the type to raise his friend’s kid out of love. If not out of love, perhaps out of guilt? But that man rarely ever feels guilt, so… I don’t know. Maybe he wanted to make a loyal servant out of you.”

Jongho laughed at that. “I was, in fact, that, until a few years ago when I overheard that conversation. I thought I misinterpreted that but then your mother said some things, and I was lost.”

“Well, I hope you can find your answers,” you said. “I’ll look back at the house again- there must be something rather than nothing there, if you found that picture as well.”

“Thank you,” Jongho looked at you. “Why do you think your mother disappeared out of the blue? Do you really think she did?”

“She started to hate my father with an intensity that was unimaginable. She never told me why. But… I don’t think she would have left me alone if she ran away from my father. He says she might have died in Eden since Eden wasn’t in the best shape at that time- a lot of women met unfortunate fates. But you say she left for Mist Island, which changes everything as well. The fact that he keeps insisting that she’s dead…”

“Well, I guess we can establish that Mr. Lee is a liar and we can’t believe a word that comes out from his mouth,” Jongho said.

“True,” you nodded. “I still have my sources looking for her in Eden, and now here too. Keeping an eye and ear out for any news, any sighting of her. I’ve found nothing all these years. I just want to know if she’s alive.”

“What should we do?”

“We plan,” you smirked. “He will become a minister soon- we can’t stop that. But once we find something that shows evidence of his corruption, it’ll be more satisfying when he has to step down. We become aggressive with that approach so he focuses only on that while we look into the past in hopes that we find our answers. Are you in?”

“I am,” he nodded- the plan made sense. “So we really are a team now, huh? Am I still your bodyguard?”

“If you love protecting me so much,” you said and he laughed at that, making you smile as well. You liked the way his eyes curved and his lips stretched into a wide smile. “I’d prefer the term partners, but that’s only for our ears.”

“I like that,” he was looking at you with a gaze that made you uneasy. “I’d also like it if we don’t hide from each other as we find those answers.”

“You’re very cryptic,” you commented. He only smiled at that, taking your hurt hand again and caressing it once before looking at you and almost smirking before he pulled you closer, making your eyes go wide in surprise.

“I’m not protecting you because of Mr. Lee anymore. I hope you realise that,” his voice was barely a whisper and your heart swooped at that. Before you could say or do anything, he hesitated before he brought his other hand to your face and touched it once, ever so lightly, before drawing back and leaving the room.

Leaving you in a flurry of unrecognisable emotions as you sat in the remnants of his touch.

—-------------------

As soon as your father was appointed the Minister of Foreign Affairs, it seemed like all hell broke loose. The uproar in the palace as the subjects of the king expressed their disappointment in the decision could be heard for miles. The citizens started protesting especially when the soldiers from Eden started terrorising the locals, which led to innocent spilling of blood and unfair punishments- it was obvious even to a fool that the locals were at a disadvantage and were being treated unfairly.

However, your father continued to parade shamelessly through town, head arrogantly high and that permanent smug across his face. You had just been gazing out of the window, admiring the clear sky after a spell of cloudy days, when you spotted the person you least wanted to see and groaned audibly, making Jongho, who was sitting across you reading a book, look up at you, laughing to himself when he saw your incredibly annoyed face.

“I’m guessing Mr. Lee is making his way here,” he went back to reading his book.

You folded your arms as you glared at him. “I didn’t think you were actually serious when you said he would come visit any day now.”

“It was about time anyway,” Jongho flipped a page. “He’s really the kind to boast about his achievements, and you being on the side that’s against him… he’s going to rub it in your face. I suppose I’ll enjoy the sight-”

He blocked the spoon you threw at him with his book, chuckling. Before you could pick something else to attack him with, the ominous bell of the hotel door rang and you heard a good amount of people entering. With a glare at Jongho’s direction, you made your way to the reception.

“I don’t believe you have a reservation,” you said coolly, not bothering with greetings. “We’re quite full today, so-”

“Hotel Crescent,” your father looked around, pausing when he spotted Jongho who was pretending he was too busy to notice what the ruckus was about. “Business must be booming these days.”

“More foreigners than locals is not a good sign,” you raised your brow at him. He looked back at his gang of five- all from Eden- and laughed. 

“Good thing I’m a local then!”

“Are you?” You scoffed. “You haven’t called Mist Island your home in more than two decades.”

“Well,” Mr. Lee ignored that. “Can we have some coffee then? I’m here to discuss business with you, Madame. Let’s keep it professional, shall we?”

You motioned at Sakura to lead the guests to the empty table, but your father made his way to Jongho who finally looked up and pretended to be pleasantly surprised as he got up and bowed. As they seated, you watched your father have what looked like a serious conversation with Jongho. He was probably interrogating him and hearing what Jongho had to report. You made your way to that table after a few minutes, seating yourself before folding your arms and glaring pointedly at your father.

“I take it you’re getting along with Jongho here,” he smirked.

“Quite well, actually,” you narrowed your eyes at him. “Let’s talk business.”

Your father took a deep breath before shifting a bit in his seat to turn towards you. “I’ve heard you trade a secret for a secret. Any kind.”

“That’s true, but I measure the worth of your secret before I give something back,” you said.

“Well, I have something for you-”

“And with people like you,” you continued, “I don’t really believe a word that comes out of your mouth, so don’t expect me to give you something back.”

He chuckled loudly at that, shaking his head and looking at Jongho as if they could share that sentiment. Jongho, to your relief, didn’t respond. Mr. Lee shook his head. “How about this? You give me a secret about your dear Prince Hongjoong, and I’ll give you something you can’t resist.”

“First of all, I don’t have a very personal relationship with Prince Hongjoong,” you began. “I could have been working for Prince Woobin had he not resorted to ugly means instead of asking first like any respectable man should. Secondly… no thanks.”

“Ah, I’ll let Prince Woobin know that,” your father said as if he was quite friendly with the prince. “He thinks we lost what could have been a wonderful ally in this… game we’re playing.”

You narrowed your eyes at him. “I don’t think he thinks that. He has people everywhere. He doesn’t need me.”

“And yet…” he locked eyes with you. “He fears Prince Hongjoong is growing stronger with each passing day, and he only has his own little group of spies and… you.”

You didn’t hide your smirk. “What do you have to offer?”

“I could tell you about your mother,” your father said and your heart sank. “I hear you’re looking for her in Mist Island too now. I could help you look for her.”

“What makes you think I need your help now, after all this time?” You replied, not letting him detect the agitation in your tone. “I’ll manage on my own, thank you very much.”

“I could tell you whether she is alive or dead, whether she’s here or in Eden or in another country as well. Are you sure you don’t want this?”

Unconsciously, you glanced at Jongho who was already looking at you. Somehow, his gaze alone made you gather your nerves of steel back and you looked back at your father. “If you don’t have anything better to offer me, then we’re done.”

You saw your father’s jaw clench and you smiled in satisfaction. If he had offered you the same thing a few years ago, you would have given him anything he wanted. You were not that person anymore. With a sigh, he got up and his men followed. He looked pointedly at you. “You’ll regret this.”

“Will I, now?” You scoffed, getting up and standing in front of him. “You’ll regret stepping foot back at Mist Island soon, Mr. Lee. Brace yourself.”

Your father left with disdain in his eyes and you waited until he was gone before you practically rushed upstairs to your room, shutting the door behind you as you began to process everything.

Your father knows where your mother is. He even knows if she’s alive or dead. He just didn’t bother letting you know, all these years. Why? Was there a reason behind it or was he just a sadistic bastard who loved seeing you suffer?

A knock sounded on your door and you heard Jongho call your name. “Can you let me in?”

“Now’s not a good time,” you hesitated before you replied, hoping your voice wouldn’t crack.

“All the more reason to let me in,” he said. You contemplated for a moment before wiping your eyes and opening the door for him, not looking at him as you went to stand near the window. 

“Are you… okay? I know it’s a stupid question but… talk to me instead of keeping it in. I can see that it’s killing you.”

For a moment, you wanted to ask Jongho who he thought he was to make assumptions like these (even if he was right). You wanted to fire him for crossing the formal boundary between you two- even though you two had established that he was not working under anybody now. You wanted to tell him to go back to being Mr. Lee’s loyal servant. But as you glanced at Jongho… you realised he was pretty much in the same position as you- it looked like your father knew what really happened to his parents as well, and he couldn’t ask him. And he wasn’t just your bodyguard anymore- you two were way past that. From eating your meals together, plotting schemes, trading secrets- you were partners now. 

“It’s funny, Jongho,” you sighed. “If he had made this offer a while ago, I would have accepted. It’s making me wonder where I stand now. I never pledged my loyalty to Mist Island and to Prince Hongjoong. I’m still searching for my mother. Yet here I am, protecting him and his land, throwing away the chance to end this quest once and for all.”

“You made the right decision,” he insisted. “At least about not letting your father hold that power over you. And I can see why you like Prince Hongjoong- he’s helping you look for your mother even in the midst of all this, even when you never asked.”

Your heart swelled- Jongho understood. “Does it make me a bad daughter, Jongho?”

“It doesn’t,” he moved from the fireplace and walked towards you, standing by your side as you both gazed at the sun setting over the busy streets of the town. “You’ve never stopped looking for her- you’re doing everything in your power. How could you think it makes you a bad daughter?”

“I’m just… tired of looking,” you sighed, putting a hand over your quivering lips. “It’s been years and it’s like she never existed. She disappeared without a trace. Did she abandon me on purpose? I keep thinking that, and then I remember how she promised me that she would never, and then I think I’m a bad person for thinking that-”

“Hey,” Jongho watched you hide your face away from him as your shoulders shook. Hesitantly, he put a hand on your shoulder, caressing it. “It’s okay to have these thoughts. But you know what? You won today. You don’t need that man to help you. You have so many people with you- Prince Hongjoong and Seonghwa have been helping you all this time because they care, because you help them in return. I am helping you- because I care about you too.”

“I just don’t know what to do anymore, why I’m doing this anymore,” you stopped crying, wiping your eyes. “Why am I running this business, putting myself in danger, when I could have lived a quiet life? Why am I doing all this?”

Jongho turned you towards him and he put his hands on your arms, rubbing them as he locked eyes with you and smiled. “You know… I thought you were some spoiled person with too much money and power but you’ve surprised me everyday. You’re nothing like your father. You trade secrets, manipulate, but I’ve never seen it bring harm to the place you live in. Whether unconsciously or consciously, you’ve been helping Mist Island itself- not the king, not the princes, but the land, your home. My home,” he tucked some stray hair behind your ear and your breath caught as he wiped a tear from your eye as well, proceeding to cup your face. “You’re so brave for doing that. Braver than any soldier. And you never gave up on your mother- that makes you the strongest person I know. And I know you’re looking into my parents, even when I never asked for it. You’re loyal to those who you choose, and I’m glad you chose me. I’m right about the last part, aren’t I? Or am I delusional?”

You laughed at that, nodding. “I think I am, unless I learn you’re still working for my father in which case, I’ll kill you in your sleep-”

Jongho shook his head as he put a finger on your lips to shut you up and your heart lurched- the air felt so thick right now, especially with his gaze on your lips. “I do think I should do something about this mouth of yours.”

He looked in your eyes and it was as if he finally realised the position you two were in- mere inches away, his hand on your face and the other on your lips. He cleared his throat as he put his hands back to your arms and you couldn’t believe that you felt anything but relief at that. You wanted his hands back-

“You can lean on me, y/n,” his voice was low. “Let’s not lean on anybody else but each other, shall we?”

You didn’t need to contemplate that anymore. As your answer, you stepped forward and put your head against his chest, almost at the crook of his neck. You felt Jongho tense and for a moment, you feared he never meant for any of this to happen, but then he wrapped his arms around you and you felt… strange, almost like you were safe. You had never felt safe in anyone’s arms before. You could feel the warmth and strength in his arms as he hugged you and you let your hands hold his jacket as you stayed like this for a few moments before you muttered a thank you.

“You don’t need to thank me,” he broke the hug and patted your cheek once. “I’ll be downstairs- you shouldn’t keep your business waiting for too long.”

You smiled at that and watched him leave, putting your hands on your cheeks in disbelief and finding them warm. What was happening?

—-------------------

A few days later, you found yourself back at the palace- but this time, in the middle of the night. You spotted Jongho trying to fight his yawn as the two of you waited for the prince to arrive and you scoffed.

“Just yawn, big and large, and get it over with,” you told him and he sighed, grinning. You didn’t realise you were grinning back until he paused and looked at you.

“What?” He asked.

“You have a… cute smile.”

You immediately realised a few things- Jongho never expected to hear something like this from you, you never expected to say something like this to anyone for that matter, and the fact that you actually thought about this-

“It’s the lack of sleep talking, isn’t it?” He laughed this time, all gummy smiles and curved eyes and you resisted the urge to pinch the cheek of the man who was sitting in front of you. In the royal chambers. You ought to get a grip-

“Yes, but it’s also the truth,” you tilted your head as you watched him in a teasing manner. “Has nobody ever told you that?”

“Okay, stop flirting with me,” Jongho clapped as he straightened. “The prince will be arriving any second now.”

“But he’s not here right now,” you teased and Jongho scoffed at you and shook his head in disbelief.

“I’ll let the Prince know he ought to think twice before disturbing your sleeping schedule because clearly it’s messing with your brain- it’s like you’re a whole new person when you’re sleepy-”

“Or maybe I’m just too wide awake for my own good-”

“What’s happening? I wanna join- it looks like something interesting is going on,” Hongjoong arrived with Seonghwa right behind and the two of you got up, stifling your giggles- giggles- as you bowed. 

You really should have taken a nap today.

“Nothing, Prince Hongjoong,” you smiled sweetly at him and he pouted.

“You’re no fun,” the prince shook his head and Seonghwa scoffed.

“You’re one to say,” he muttered as he sat and Prince Hongjoong looked pointedly at him.

“This lad is practically asking for an execution order now,” he pointed at Seonghwa who dramatically bowed in apology. “Anyways, I have information that I need to share urgently. I know what exactly it is that Woobin has been trying so hard to hide. It’s a ledger which proves that the King and Prince Woobin have been illegally depositing funds to… make a guess where exactly.”

“Eden?” You shrugged, “But then… I think there’s a third nation involved?”

“Utopia is funding Eden’s mission to annex Mist Island- it’s nothing new if we think about it. Eden’s government has always been somewhat controlled by Utopia. Eden’s prince is one fool if he thinks Utopia will just sit and watch as Mist Island and Eden become one- they’ll take over Eden right after. I don’t know what they’re blinded by, but clearly a large amount of black money makes do.”

“So the physical copy is here?” You asked and they nodded. “And it gives proof of your brother and father’s involvement?”

“Sadly, yes,” Prince Hongjoong confirmed and you scoffed in disbelief. “As well as your father’s involvement.”

“Of course,” you nodded. “How do you want to proceed?”

“We were thinking,” Seonghwa began, “We obtain the ledgers and either resort to blackmailing or make it public.”

“Wouldn’t blackmailing put your life at more risk?” Jongho pointed out. “They won’t just sit back and let you control them even if you could make the ledgers public.”

“To hold the King and Prince accountable and stop this madness, I need more power- not just the empty title of Prince by my name,” Hongjoong said. “And there’s one way the King would have to renounce the throne- if the senior scholars in the palace, all eight of them agree that the King is not fit to rule anymore. Prince Woobin’s involvement will automatically make him unfit as well, which would leave me.”

“How do you plan to convince the scholars?” You asked. “They’d believe you right away but that doesn’t mean they would agree to stand against the King himself.”

“Have you ever kept… something from all of your years in this business, all of our years working together? Something we could use now? It’s okay if you don’t want to lend us if you have something,” Seonghwa glanced at Prince Hongjoong who nodded. “But I think it’ll be helpful if we have a detailed list or something like that.”

You looked at the Prince and his loyal friend- you wouldn’t call Seonghwa anything but a friend to Prince Hongjoong. A smile creeped up your face and the Prince mirrored it.

“You have. I knew you would have.”

“I have,” you confirmed and Jongho clapped at that. “And I’ll gladly lend it to you.”

“Let us know what you want in return,” the Prince was smiling warmly, but you shook your head.

“I want nothing from you, Prince Hongjoong. I’ve never wanted anything from you. In fact… I don't know why I chose to help you, but you haven’t betrayed me like anyone else would have. You didn’t simply use me. That’s enough.”

“I told you she’s our friend,” Seonghwa grinned at the Prince and you gaped at them while Jongho stifled his laugh. 

“I guess you could call it that, though I never imagined I would have such a friend circle,” you laughed as you looked around at the three men.

“I’d like it if you could talk to me informally, Madame Lee,” Prince Hongjoong grinned. “Just call me Hongjoong. Both of you.”

“Only if you stop calling me Madame Lee as well,” you said and everyone laughed at that. “So… I do have a record of all the events that took place because of my business. Would that be enough?”

“We’d like it if you could come with us when we talk to the scholars,” Seonghwa pushed his dark hair out of his eyes. “It would make a better impression- that the Minister’s daughter doesn’t approve of whatever’s happening.”

“I suppose it would be a slap on my father’s face as well,” you pondered. “I’m not sure they would like me much, though. I don’t exactly have the best reputation.”

“That doesn’t matter,” Hongjoong assured you. “So? Will you?”

“I will,” you promised.

“If I may,” Jongho began and everyone nodded. “Has anyone heard of the Twilight Society?”

“The Twilight Society?” You frowned, glancing at Seonghwa and Hongjoong who were looking at each other suspiciously. “It looks like someone has.”

“Where did you hear that?” Hongjoong’s voice was grim. Jongho straightened a bit, glancing at you.

“I imagine it exists then?”

“It existed,” Seonghwa corrected. “Long ago. No one has called its name out loud in two decades.”

“Who were they?” Jongho asked and Seonghwa shook his head.

“Where did you hear it?”

“I once heard Mr. Lee talk to his right hand man about some Twilight Society- it sounded like a name of a place or a group. I forgot all about it, but some recent digging into the past made me wonder if I shouldn’t have forgotten about it after all.”

You were confused- what was he getting at? Seonghwa was looking at Hongjoong, waiting for his sign to either proceed with the chat or shut everyone up. But then Hongjoong took a deep breath.

“Who is involved? Why are you digging into the past? The Twilight Society was dissolved two decades ago”

“My parents were spies for the King- your father,” Jongho began. “I’m imagining that the Twilight Society was some special mission group which my parents were a part of- they passed away during that mission.”

Hongjoong nodded slowly. “I’m not aware of the members of that society, but I’ll look into it. How does this help us, though?”

“I don’t think my parents passed away because of the enemy- I think something happened. I’m sure Mr. Lee wasn’t a member, but he knows all about what happened to the Twilight Society. If it really was a top secret mission, why does he know about it? Especially when he wasn’t an important figure back then? I’m sure none of the members would have told any outsider of what their mission was, or who they were, for that matter.”

“That’s awfully suspicious,” Seonghwa glanced at you and realised you weren’t aware of this either. “I think I should look into who the members were, and see if your parents really were members of that group. I should look into what exactly their mission was, and why no one dares speak of it.”

“Thank you,” Jongho nodded. “I’m sure the scholars wouldn’t be pleased to hear that someone like Mr. Lee knows of the King’s private matters since so long ago.”

After concluding the discussion, you and Jongho decided to walk back to the Hotel unescorted- there was this unexplainable rush of adrenaline you were feeling after finding out everything. You glanced at Jongho. “I really think we should look at my father’s old house again- there must be something back there.”

“I think so too- at first, I thought I was overthinking, but since they confirmed it…” 

You nodded. “How about we make a little detour?”

Jongho narrowed his eyes at you. “Isn’t it way past your bedtime?”

“I’m not some old cranky woman who cares too much about her ‘bedtime’,” you pouted. “Plus, I’m wide awake after that conversation back in the palace. The house is near as well- only a two minutes walk from here.”

“Well, I suppose we could-”

Jongho’s eyes caught a flash in the dark and you almost screamed when he grabbed your arms and turned around, hiding you two behind a tree as an arrow whooshed past you and hit right where you would have been. Jongho scanned you once to make sure you were okay. “Do you have any weapons on you?”

You nodded and he dared to take a peek, resulting in another arrow mere inches away from the tree you were hiding behind. You took a deep breath. “You have your gun?”

Jongho nodded. You told him your plan and he agreed. Jongho slid to his left, shooting at the direction from where the two arrows had come from and running to the other tree for cover right as you went to your right, separating from him, hoping there was only one or two persons attacking you instead of a whole group. You were right next to another street and you took advantage of the shadows and your black cloak to disappear into the street while Jongho, being a bait, made your attackers follow him away from you. But what you hadn’t told Jongho of your plan was that you were going to take a detour yourself.

You could hear the attacks- the gun wasn’t too loud thanks to the silencer but you could hear the scuffle. You went for the street across where Jongho was, spotting the men. They were two, to your relief. You produced a dagger from your boot and aimed for the closest person, hitting him square in the back.

If there was one thing you were proud of, it was your aim. 

The other man noticed his partner and aimed his arrow for you. You rolled to the side and waited for the arrow to miss you before throwing a dagger, practically blind, and missing him as well. You knew now that he was going to come for you, and you hid and waited until he did. You knocked the arrow out of his grip and almost hit him with the dagger but he gripped your wrist and twisted it painfully. You took off your hairpin, unravelling your hair from the bun, and hit his shoulder. He screamed in pain but unfortunately, his grip on your wrist didn't loosen and he twisted you until your back was flush against him, with the very dagger you had planted in his shoulder now painfully digging in your neck.

"I've waited so long to kill you," his raspy voice made you shiver. You rolled your eyes, about to hit his side with your elbow in an attempt to get free but then the man tensed.

"You move one inch and I shoot you right here." 

It was Jongho, right behind the man, and though you couldn't see him, you figured he had creeped up behind you and was pointing the gun at the man's head. The man scoffed, purposely dragging the dagger along your neck just enough to cut you before raising his hands in the air, dropping the dagger. Now free, you immediately turned and went behind Jongho.

"Who sent you?"

"You can kill me. I won't answer."

"You don't need to," you said, voice steel. "Do whatever you please with him, Jongho."

Jongho shot at the man's thigh, his scream ringing through the air before he stifled it. "Come prepared next time… if you can even manage to walk."

Jongho grabbed your hand and you both made a run for the house- someone was bound to come and check what the screaming was about, especially since this was a residential area. Once inside your old house, you shut the door and Jongho immediately grabbed your shoulder, examining the wound on your neck.

"Are you hurt anywhere else?" He asked and you shook your head. Jongho sighed. "Do you have any idea how dangerous this was?"

"This isn't the first time," you simply said. 

"Why did you come back? I had it under control-”

“I couldn’t just leave you there-”

“You could have been hurt!” Jongho sounded exasperated but then he shook his head, touching the skin right behind the cut, wiping the trickling blood in process. “You could have been killed, and I-”

“You could have been killed as well,” you locked eyes with him. “You think I would have liked that? I came back for you. That’s it- I don’t care if it was dangerous.”

Jongho almost glared at you but soon he was smiling, brushing your hair away from your shoulders as he tucked your hair behind. The mere action was so intimate, nothing like you had ever experienced before, that you suddenly felt conscious of the distance between you two, the sound of his breath, and his gaze- he played with your hair. “I like you better with your hair down.”

You rolled your eyes at that, trying to push him away but he grabbed your wrists, making you look up at him. “Don’t you ever scare me like that again, okay?”

You pursed your lips, feeling overwhelmed- he actually cared. You nodded, and he left your wrists only to wrap his arms securely around you, and this time, you hugged him back properly, wrapping your arms around his waist and sighing in relief because you had been wanting to do that for a long time now. With a kiss to your temple, he broke the hug, making you raise your brows at him. 

“You make me so confused, y/n,” he almost whispered, cupping your face and caressing your cheeks as he looked at you. “I don’t know how I went from strongly disliking you to… this.”

“This?” You asked. “Are you saying you actually like me now?”

“See?” He laughed. “You’re such a tease. I didn’t like that at first, but I’m not going to complain now.”

“I’m as confused as you right now,” you put your hands on his that were still holding your face. “What do you intend to do with me, Choi Jongho?”

He almost smirked at that, leaning forward and planting a lingering kiss on your forehead first, surprising you. His hands went further down your neck, tilting your face as he kissed your cheek, almost trailing his lips down to yours-

Before you could grab him and do the deed, the sound of something crashing in the living room made you both jump and Jongho once again put himself in front of you as you both went for the living room. The window was open, however, the cardboard boxes that had been right under it were almost smashed, as if someone had stepped over them. Whoever had intruded had probably knocked something over and was either hiding or ran away. You went for the window, spotting movement at the end of the street before it disappeared entirely. 

“I don’t think we’re safe yet,” you announced. “Let’s get this over with quickly. You search the office, I’ll search the rooms.”

“Okay,” Jongho’s gaze was indecipherable and he went to the office while you went to your room first, checking the box under the floor to see if whoever intruded had something to do with this. However, your previous letter was still there. Sighing, you went to your parents’ room, searching for something you didn’t know the nature of. But anything suspicious, anything that resembled a journal or an entry book, you grabbed that and met Jongho in the hallway, who had done the same.

“Should we wait before we go back? Someone might be outside.”

“That someone could very well come inside too, so let’s just go back- I feel safer in my own room,” you referred to your hotel and he nodded, putting everything in a bag that he wore before and grabbing more weapons before you left. Your walk was swift and silent, and you relaxed once you reached the hotel. 

“Someone must have known we were going out tonight- I told no one, though. Did you?” You asked Jongho as you went inside your room and he dumped the bag on the table.

“I didn’t,” Jongho shook his head. “Did anyone see you?”

“I don’t think so, but I think there might be a rat here, in my staff,” you felt bitter at the thought alone. “I’ll think about it tomorrow, I have the worst headache right now.”

“Just sleep,” Jongho nodded. “Let’s talk tomorrow?”

You nodded, and walked Jongho to the door. You called his name and when he turned, you tiptoed to kiss him on his cheek, catching him by surprise. 

“Thank you for… everything.”

Jongho made a funny face as if he couldn’t believe it but then he smiled, waving as he left, and when you shut the door, you sank to the floor grinning like an idiot.

—-------------------

“I don’t think we’re finding anything at this rate. It’s all so cryptic anyway- what are you doing?”

You were glaring at one of your father’s journals, the entries very cryptic, just like Jongho had said. You found out that your father usually noted when exactly he met someone and at what place, and you wondered if noting it down helped him with his memory- he didn’t have a bad memory at all. That must be the reason. 

“You know, glaring holes into these isn’t going to make something pop up,” Jongho tossed a candy near you and you glared at him once before unwrapping it and putting it into your mouth, going back to what you were doing. “You’ll have better luck looking at these albums- let’s switch.”

You sighed, smacking the diary shut and slumping back. “I think we’re only wasting our time. He’s not one to leave behind any trace.” You exchanged your diaries with the albums and started flipping through them. “And even if we find something, we can’t really link anything to what’s currently happening. It’s a long shot.”

“No harm looking,” Jongho said, flipping through the pages. “Besides, isn’t it fun just sitting here and doing basically nothing? A day off from your duties?”

“I don’t remember the last time I took a day off,” you smiled, but then it faltered. “However, this is the last thing I would want to do on my day off.”

Jongho looked at you then, suddenly curious. “What would you rather do instead?”

“I don’t know,” you stretched your arms, thinking. “Visit the beach? It’s been a while, but now there are soldiers everywhere. I could go to the beach in the south though. That area has been secluded for a while and I have acquaintances who live there. It would be nice to visit them.”

“Well,” Jongho threw the diary back into the bag. “Get up then. We’re going to the beach. I’ll be back in a few minutes, and you better be ready by then.”

“Wait, you’re serious?” You scoffed. “I can’t just leave like this-”

“You can,” Jongho grinned. “You’re the boss here. This place can run itself. Come on, get up.”

“Jongho,” you groaned, looking up at the roof as if that would help. Jongho only crawled behind you and flicked your forehead, making you mutter a curse at which he snickered before pushing you up. 

“Don’t be such a brat. Dress casually for once- and don’t tie your hair.”

“Why are you so obsessed with my hair-” you faltered when you recalled how you two had almost kissed last night. You glanced at him and were surprised to see a light flush across his cheeks.

“It just makes you look good. I like it, okay?” He fidgeted awkwardly and then shoo-ed you again, making you laugh as he practically pushed you inside your room. “Fifteen minutes!”

Jongho liked you, you were sure. You liked him too, there was no denying it, but you two were still figuring it out, it seemed. And you planned to get to know him today- not the Jongho who worked under Mr. Lee, but Choi Jongho, the person that he was. You shuffled through your clothes and wore a beige casual gown with ruffled sleeves, leaving your hair half tied with a straw hat, and finally pulling over your black cloak. As you stood in front of the mirror with a racing heart, you realised you were excited. You hadn’t felt like this in years.

Jongho was changing you and your life, and though you hated sudden change, you liked this. And you were realising that he was breaking your walls down. You would never let anyone get as close to you as Jongho had gotten in such a short period of time. You never trusted someone, never asked someone to trust you, yet…

You heard a knock on the door and took a deep breath before taking your bag and opening the door, both of you surprised as you scanned each other- Jongho because you really had let your hair down, and you because he was dressed in a white button up shirt under a brown coat and he looked really, really good.

“Who are you?” You asked, making him grin. “Remember to take your weapons- it’s not safe anywhere these days.”

“I’d remind you too, but I’m afraid to ask just how many daggers you keep on you.”

“Don’t ask,” you nodded, “Shall we?”

The two of you decided to take public transport until you reached the town that bordered the beach in the south. You pointed out a few spots to Jongho and he tried to recall what he remembered of Mist Island. You told him you should have shown him around earlier, but he insisted that now was okay. He also asked why you preferred the beach in the south as opposed to the one closer, when you both took horses for the rest of the path.

“It’s the one spot my mother took me whenever she felt overwhelmed,” you told him. “As you know, my father was absent for the most part of my life. Maybe she missed him. Maybe she just needed someone by her side- someone who was not a child.”

“And the people who live here, the ones you mentioned?” Jongho asked. “Who are they?”

“That’s where they live,” you pointed at a hut at the top of the hill, not very far from where you were now. “They were her friends- I don’t exactly know how. It’s been a decade since I last came here so I guess I will have to reintroduce myself. Maybe they’ll remember me.”

You tied your horses to the trees near the hut and decided to go around the beach first before visiting the hut. The beach was empty, only the sound of the waves crashing and the seagulls in the air. You took off your sandals and Jongho followed, grinning at the feeling of the wet sand in your feet. 

“This beach is a lot cleaner, I’ll give you that,” Jongho laughed.

“And there’s no one,” you smiled. “We’ve got this place all to ourselves- that’s my favourite part.”

Jongho watched you- something in you had shifted the moment you took off your shoes and started walking along the shore, occasionally bending to pick a seashell. He followed closely behind, loving the way the wind was blowing your hair away. You turned and caught him staring at you and you raised a brow. He only came beside you to walk with you.

“If we prevent this war and peace comes one day, what do you want to do? After everything is over?”

Jongho thought about it before answering. “I want to move back here. I feel like I’m home.”

“It is your home,” you nodded. “I’m glad you’re finally ditching Eden.”

“I never liked it much if I’m being honest,” Jongho laughed, looking at you. “What would you like to do?”

You took a deep breath, pausing and gazing at the setting sun, the pastels in the sky and the sea. “I want to sell my hotel and find lodging somewhere away from the city- preferably here. I could train the girls here in a variety of things- business, self defence, or even knitting. I just… want to live a quiet life…” you looked at him. “Would you like to join me? You could teach them whatever tricks you’ve learned from my father.”

Jongho threw his head back as he laughed, making you laugh as well. “Yeah? I could teach them how to deal with spoiled brats like you too.”

“Definitely,” you grinned. “What do you say? You and me in this town, away from all the drama. Living in a nice little cottage, growing our own vegetables-”

“Together?” Jongho asked, and something told you that he was talking about a lot of ‘togethers’. You looked at him, watching the wind blowing away his dark hair, his eyes glinting with a hint of amusement, a faint smile on his lips. Would you like to spend the rest of your life with him? Would he like to stay your friend at the very least?

“Together,” you nodded, promising. “If you’d like-”

You didn’t expect him to cup your face and bring you in for a kiss but after recovering from the initial shock, you immediately melted into it, kissing him back, your hands fisting his shirt. The moment couldn’t have been more perfect, and when Jongho broke apart, he joined his forehead with yours. 

“I’m only staying in Mist Island if it’s with you,” he admitted, looking in your eyes for an answer and you gave him a nod, kissing him again. The waves washed your feet as you kissed, making you shiver into it, and you both broke apart, giggling slightly. You put an arm at his back, leaning into him as you both watched the sun set, overwhelmed by the emotions so opting to let the moment talk for itself.

As soon as it got dark, you both headed for the hut and you spotted a woman. “Aunt Nari?”

The woman turned and you gasped at how much she had aged- her hair had lost its colour and there were wrinkles on her face, but somehow, she was still graceful, especially in the way she walked to you and touched your face as if she couldn’t believe her eyes.

“Y/n?” She asked and you nodded which resulted in her immediately enveloping you in a hug as she expressed how surprised she was to see you here and how much she had missed you. “Where’s your mother?”

You glanced at Jongho and then back at the woman. Thankfully, her attention diverted as well and she asked who the ‘young handsome man’ was. 

“My friend, Jongho,” you introduced and Jongho raised a brow at you before greeting the woman. She made you two sit on one of the benches, lighting the rest of the lamps before going inside for refreshments and to call her husband. Jongho tapped your shoulder.

“Just your friend?”

“What else do you suppose you are?” You teased.

“Well, I don’t know,” Jongho leaned forward, making you lean back as well but he leaned to whisper in your ear, “Do friends kiss like that?”

He was so pleased to see you blush like that, and felt victorious when you had no retort. You were relieved to be interrupted by Aunt Nari’s husband coming to greet you both.

“You’ve grown up so much!” He laughed as the couple sat down in front of you. The man looked at Jongho. “Last I saw her, she was still this much-”

“I was not that small!” You scoffed and the rest of them laughed. 

“How’s your mother? I thought she would be with you- did she forget us? She hasn’t visited us in forever.”

“Actually, I’m sorry I didn’t come earlier,” you told them, sipping on the tea before continuing. “My mother kind of went missing a few years ago. I’ve been searching for her but to no avail.”

“Oh, goodness,” Aunt Nari set her cup down. “When did that happen? Where could she be?”

“I don’t know how or why it happened,” you sighed. “Last I know is she went to Eden to visit my father- about eight years ago- and then she never came back. I tried contacting you back then but you weren’t here.”

“That must have been when we thought we’d settle in Utopia,” Uncle Jung said. “We only came back to Mist Island three years ago.”

“Ah,” you nodded. “Well, Aunt Nari, you knew my mother better than me. Do you think she ever wanted to run away? Simply leave everything behind and escape? You know she didn’t have the best relationship with my father.”

“One thing I know for sure is that even if she wanted to, she could never leave you,” she said and you almost slumped in relief. Jongho put a hand on yours. “Did you not find a clue or something?”

“I searched all these years in Eden, but Jongho told me she had left- presumably for Mist Island. I suspect my father had a hand in this- he clearly knows whether she’s alive or dead but sometimes he feigns innocence. Sometimes he slips and says something which makes me think if he’s behind this. I don’t know what to believe anymore.”

“Oh dear, that’s unfortunate,” Aunt Nari looked at her husband and you noticed their cryptic gaze. 

“If there's anything you can tell me that might help… please tell me.”

“I suppose you’re grown enough to know this,” Aunt Nari looked guilty. “Your father isn’t the best man, I suppose you know that already.” You nodded at that and she continued, “Your father always wanted to involve himself in dangerous politics. Your mother opposed that strongly at first but then she gave in. The last time she met me, which must have been right before she went to visit him in Eden, she told me she was so close to discovering something about your father- something she could use to finally separate from him. He was always lying to her, that man. She knew he was a liar, a murderer, but he always denied it. She didn’t want to be with a man who she didn’t feel safe with.”

You nodded at that. You could understand that about her. “Did she tell you what she was about to find?”

“Something about this secret mission from the King- I suppose there are a lot of those, but this one somehow involved your father. She didn’t exactly tell me how or why, but she was convinced that your father had a hand in the mission going horribly wrong, which also caused the death of someone she was close with.”

You felt Jongho’s grip on your hand tighten a bit. “Is that it?” You asked and she nodded. “Thank you so much, Aunt. I’ll visit you again. I’m searching for answers myself, so this was very helpful.”

“Just stay safe, kid,” she patted your cheek as you got up. “Stay safe.”

You hugged them both, promising again to visit them when you’ll finally find the answers, and when you were about to ride back, you looked at Jongho. “This has to be connected to the Twilight Society, right? My father messed up something with that mission, it seems.”

“Let’s wait until Seonghwa confirms this,” he patted your shoulder before you two got up on your horses. “And let’s pray it’s not worse than we think.”

—----------------

Now that you had taken a step further into your relationship with Jongho, you were finding just how much everything had changed but strangely enough, nothing had changed at all. 

It was kind of funny- you both still teased each other to the point the other would be annoyed, you both still spent most of your time together. He hovered over you a lot while you were working, and when you had free time you two would talk. Yet… the way you looked at each other now was different. Every glance and every touch was more meaningful. You two didn’t have much experience in that field so you two were navigating your way together, at a calm pace. 

However, sometimes all you wanted was for him to hold you. Sometimes, at night after wrapping up, if you both were up for one last cup of tea or coffee, you two would sit by the fire in each other’s arms. He would massage your shoulders or you would play with his hair. Such simple gestures filled your heart with an overwhelmingly good feeling. And sometimes, when he would tuck your hair back before he kissed you, you would want to live in that moment forever. 

You both were still trying to figure out just what Mr. Lee’s role was in the disappearance of your mother, in the Twilight Society’s mission that had failed. With each passing day, there was this undeniable tension growing around you two. Mr. Lee was your father, and he was the man who raised Jongho. Though you two badmouthed the man all you wanted with each other, things were different now as the suspicions grew. 

As you closed the register and instructed Sakura to take the files to the storage, you glanced at Jongho who was sitting in a corner, going through some of his own work. He wanted to buy some land here since he had a lot of money from his time in Eden, and he was also trying to acquire the land that had once been his- his father’s home. You put your face in your hands as you watched him dreamily, your attention diverting when the bell rang and the customers entered-

Prince Hongjoong. Seonghwa. And a few guards. For a moment, your heart sank and an eerie silence fell in the hotel, prompting Jongho to look up as well. But when the Prince smiled after spotting you, you relaxed. 

“I’m just here to grab coffee with you, can you tell everyone to relax?” Hongjoong laughed as you greeted him.

“They can’t help it,” you grinned. 

“I’ll ask the guards to stay outside,” Seonghwa said and you led Hongjoong to the sitting area, who decided to sit with Jongho when he spotted him. Seonghwa joined and you had a maid take their order.

“Are you free right now?” Hongjoong asked. 

“I am,” you confirmed. “What prompted you to get coffee this late at night? Shouldn’t you be getting your royal sleep or something?”

Hongjoong chuckled. “I thought I’d visit here and boom your business. It’s been a while since I last came here.”

You nodded- it had been years. The only time he had visited was when he wanted to personally scout you. Hongjoong grinned. “I’ll visit more now, now that we’re… friends.”

“After all of this is over, this place might be no more,” you surprised him with that. “So visit more often, preferably months apart instead of years.”

“Alright,” Hongjoong nodded, glancing at Seonghwa and Jongho who were engaged in some discussion. “We’ve found out everything, y/n. About the Twilight Society. We have gathered proof, and I would like it if you could visit the day after tomorrow so we can talk to the scholars.”

Your heart sank. “Of course. Are you going to tell me what you learned?”

“After coffee,” Hongjoong sighed. “And alone. More because Jongho would need to be alone when he hears it.”

You glanced at him, your heart breaking. “How bad is it?”

“Worse than we thought,” Hongjoong sipped on his coffee. “I’m guessing you have a vague idea of what might have occurred as well.”

“I’ll let you tell me- I really don’t want to assume,” you took a big sip of your coffee, a million thoughts in your head, nothing making sense. Hongjoong talked a bit about the scholars and how they would like to hear whatever information you all would bring forward, but you could only pay him half the attention.

“I’ll brief him,” Seonghwa was the first to get up along with Jongho, who looked like he had no clue what he was going to hear. Seonghwa passed a subtle nod to Hongjoong and he got up as well. That was when Jongho got confused, when all of you made your way up the stairs. Jongho brushed his hand with yours, asking if everything was alright. You only squeezed it with a sad smile. “I’ll see you after we get briefed.”

Jongho nodded, confused when you parted ways in the hallway, Hongjoong following you to your room. He hadn’t missed the exchange between you two. “Is there something going on between you and Jongho?”

When you looked at him, your sad eyes were all the confirmation he needed. “Oh goodness. I didn’t realise how close you two were. Should I ask Seonghwa to stop-”

“That’s okay,” you urged him to take a seat. “Let’s hear it and get it over with.”

Hongjoong told you then. The only survivor of Twilight Society was the man who was now your father’s right hand man, who had actually faked his death on the documents to escape to Eden under the protection of your father. “Jongho’s parents were initially spies for the King before they met and fell in love. After their marriage, when Jongho was about two years old, the King gave them a mission which came to be their last.

“My father cherished his team, but this mission was risky. His spies were loyal to him so they wanted to take on this mission- they had to infiltrate Eden’s palace to retrieve some stolen documents. The mission was a success, actually. They came back unharmed, but Mr. Ahn- your father’s right hand man- he teamed up with your father to take all the glory for themselves. They stole the documents, and your father… he killed all the spies except him. After having a look at the documents, he made a copy and gave that to the King, but kept the original for himself, which is why he holds so much power.”

“Oh, goodness,” your hands were trembling when you brought them to your face. “My father killed his friends? Jongho’s parents?”

“We captured Mr. Ahn a few days ago, and he finally gave us some information but it was ugly,” he grimaced and you understood. “I’m sorry about this. I don’t know how Jongho will take it.”

“He raised him, Hongjoong,” you took a deep breath, willing your anger to subside but to no avail. “That man, that filth- he killed his parents and then raised him himself. What sort of a person does that? Jongho would have been loyal to him still had he not accidentally heard his conversation with Mr. Ahn and my mother’s warning-”

You paused. Your mother had gone to Eden. She had warned Jongho about a truth that she had discovered. Your father had heard her, and then she never came back. 

“What’s wrong?” Hongjoong frowned when he watched your face go pale. 

“I think he might have killed my mother too- she found out about the Twilight Society, Hongjoong,” you looked at him, fists clenching. “He would not have let her live, would he?”

Hongjoong sighed. “I think Seonghwa has something he would want to tell you about that matter.”

You waited, furious at everything and everyone, Hongjoong patting your back and then Seonghwa knocked and entered. One look at you and he felt like you had already connected the dots. He walked to you and sat beside you. “I’m sorry, y/n. Mr. Ahn told me your father… killed your mother. I don’t know if it’s true though- I can’t be sure if he’s lying or not.”

“I know he did,” you wiped your eyes. “He’s always hinted at that. And I’m going to kill him for that-”

“You will do no such thing,” Hongjoong’s voice was serious. “I get that you would want revenge. Jongho would too. But let us, let me handle it. People like Mr. Lee, their crimes should be made public. They need to fall from all that glory, and they need to feel the shame. I’m sorry, but he doesn’t deserve the swift death that you or Jongho would give him.”

You took a deep breath- somehow, Hongjoong was right. And somehow… you felt like you had known all this for a while. What kind of a man your father was. You nodded. “We can go to the scholars tomorrow.”

“Tomorrow then,” Hongjoong said. “I promise we’ll wrap up your father’s case quickly. This bloody mess shouldn’t turn into a war. Enough lives have been lost. Prince Woobin will be held accountable for possessing this knowledge and keeping it to himself as well.”

You were surprised to hear that- but then again, the relation between Prince Woobin and Prince Hongjoong was much like that of the one between your father and you. You thanked him for coming to tell you both in person, and when you shut the door, you thought of Jongho. 

Mustering your courage, you walked to Jongho’s suite, finding the door unlocked and you went inside, where you could hear Jongho’s soft sobs inside his room, the door shut. You wondered if you should back off and let him have some time to himself. He probably hated you and didn’t want to see you. After all, you were the daughter of the man who had killed his parents. With a wet face, you took a few steps until you were right in front of the door and then slid down, your back to the door. You could hear him- he was probably in the same position as you, with his back to the door too.

“Jongho,” you called and he fell silent, having heard you. “I’m so, so sorry Jongho. I- I don’t know what to say. I just want you to know that I’m sorry-”

He heard you break into sobs and he wiped his face. He heard you continue, “You can hate me. You’re allowed to hate me. Just let me see you once, please.”

Jongho couldn’t hate you- how could he ever? That man who was your father had also killed your mother. He had stolen as much from you as he had from him. You both were victims. Yes, you were your father’s daughter, but…

You were nothing like him, he thought. Your kindness, your dedication, your loyalty… you had basically freed him from the man who had held his clutches all those long, miserable years. You hadn’t caged him like your father had caged him. You were your mother’s daughter, the woman who had raised Jongho with enough love to last him a lifetime, the woman who had warned him and in the process, lost her life. Jongho couldn’t hate you. He felt sorry towards you- your mother had died because of him.

For a few minutes, the two of you sat like that until you heard Jongho get up and you moved away from the door, opting to rest your back against the wall. A few more minutes passed before Jongho finally opened the door and saw you with a black but wet face, knees drawn to your chest. He sat down beside you and some silent moments passed before he spoke.

“I hate Mr. Lee. Probably as much as you hate him, probably more.”

“I know,” you sniffed. 

“But y/n, what makes you think I would hate you?” he asked softly and you glanced at him. “I want to apologise too. Your father must have killed your mother after he heard her talk to me. She risked herself for me, and ended up dying. I’m sorry, y/n.”

“No, no,” you shook your head, turning to face him. “That’s not your fault at all.”

“Then you can stop crying, because being your father’s daughter is not your fault as well,” he simply said, facing you and taking your hands in his lap, caressing them as he continued. “We both lost so much because of that man. I think we should stop blaming ourselves now. I know that my parents have been dead for years now, but you only just found out about your mother. I’m so sorry for that.”

You nodded, looking down at your joined hands. “I’d understand if you don’t want to be together anymore, though-”

“And why would I leave you?” He tugged at your hands, making you look at him and your heart softened at the way he was looking at you. “You’re just y/n to me. The daughter who looked for her mother all those years. The woman who was strong enough to stand on her own feet when she was alone. The person who saved her home, Mist Island, by choosing the right side. The person who risks her life for the people she loves, for the people she chooses. The person I fell in love with- it’s not Mr. Lee’s daughter. It’s simply you.”

You smiled at that, tears rolling down your face again. “That was cheesy.”

“Yeah?” Jongho laughed, cupping your face as he wiped your tears, his gaze suddenly dark. “Tell me you love me too, y/n.”

You took his hands away from your face only to let him hold your waist as you crawled near him, sitting in his lap, running a hand through his hair, cupping his surprised face and kissing his lips once. “You made me realise there’s more to life than just chasing after something I can’t see. You’ve made me feel safe, and you made me feel loved. I wouldn’t trade it for anything else- I love you, and you only.”

Jongho sighed at that, resting his head on your shoulder as you held him, as if he was trying to let this sink in. His hands caressed your waist softly, and you played with the hair on the nape of his neck. When he finally shifted, he brought one hand to cup your neck as he kissed it, right at your weak point and you stifled a sigh. He felt that, and you could feel his smirk through his lips as he continued to kiss you along your neck, attacking your sweet spot way too many times until you moaned. You slapped the back of his neck. “Jongho!”

“I love the sounds that you make,” he muttered, cupping your face and swallowing any response you had as he kissed you with a feverish desperation- showing you that he loved you, that he didn’t want to lose you, that he didn’t care who your father was because you were the one that he wanted. You tried matching his pace but you let him have his way as he kissed all his worries and anxieties away, leaning into you with a force that had your back arching until you held onto him as he laid you down on the floor.

“You’re so beautiful,” he said as the two of you tried to catch your breaths, as he caressed your hair. “You’re… so beautiful.”

You couldn’t hide the flush that creeped up your cheeks- you wouldn’t have believed it had he not been looking at you with such an intense gaze. You let your hands travel down his chest, stopping at his waist, earning a sharp intake of breath from him, and he waited no further to start peppering kisses down your face, down your neck, and then you were making out again without any signs of stopping.

“Shall we take this to bed?” You suggested when you two broke apart to catch your breath. He smiled as he lazily kissed your lips again and again. 

“If you’d like, Madame,” he whispered into your ear, tugging at your earlobe with his teeth and you laughed, smacking his chest. 

“You’re naughtier than I thought.”

“Oh, you haven’t seen the best of me yet,” he said, picking you up effortlessly, earning a little scream from you, and you knew Jongho was strong but the way he had picked you up? Without flinching? It was hot, and it sent heat rushing through your body, especially when he put you down on the bed ever so gently.

“It’s a challenge,” you grinned, and he didn’t disappoint you for the rest of the night.

—----------------------

Mist Island had changed a lot in the past few weeks, ever since Prince Hongjoong was officially appointed as the person in charge of the palace, Prince Woobin having been exiled for his crimes, and the King having stepped down from the throne. Hongjoong wasn’t king yet, but already the people were absolutely pleased with him- all the traitors to the safety of this land were behind bars.

That included your father- with the heaviest sentence. His involvement was not made public simply because it would have caused the people to lose faith in their government and their officials, even though all of you would have loved to see his walk of shame. He had committed every crime that he possibly could, and the world was better off knowing such a monster never existed in the first place. 

You also found out just who the rat in your staff had been, who had been reporting to your father and the reason you were almost killed that night when you visited the palace. It was none other than Sakura- the person you worked closely with, the manager when you were absent. However, surprisingly enough, she had come clean to you herself, claiming to not know the extent your father was willing to go (after all, what father would do that to his own child?) and claiming that she was threatened with her own life too. 

You let her off the hook, only because you were closing down Hotel Crescent. A friend of yours from Eden was visiting and offered to buy the place, and you were glad for the timing. It couldn’t have been more perfect. You wrapped up everything in a matter of days before handing him the keys and taking what little you owned to your house.

You were going to keep the house, but you weren’t going to live there. You still wanted to move to the south, and you had even bought land near the beach, where currently your house was being constructed. Your and Jongho’s house, with wide gardens so you two could train people as well, just as planned. 

You looked at Jongho, laughing over something with Seonghwa and Hongjoong, who were currently in your house. You smiled to yourself, picking up the tray and setting the tea and snacks in front of them before sitting beside Jongho. “What’s so funny?”

“I have a job offer for you,” Hongjoong was grinning and you raised a brow in amusement. “I will be crowned king soon. Seonghwa would of course be my Right Hand, but I could use both of you too. I’d like you as my advisor, and Jongho as the head of security. If you’d like.”

You poured tea for him and laughed a bit as you looked at Seonghwa and Hongjoong’s faces, anxiously waiting for your answer. “I… would love that-”

“See, I told you she’d agree!” Hongjoong began-

“But,” you interrupted, “Not now. I don’t think I’d make a good advisor right now. I would like to live peacefully for a while, without a threat on my head as it has always been. You, of all people, would understand that.”

Hongjoong smiled warmly. “Of course. What do you plan to do?”

“Live with Jongho at the beach in the south,” you picked his hand and showed off your engagement rings to the two of them who clapped enthusiastically. “Just take a breather. Maybe train the women there in various skills. Jongho would like to do something similar as well.”

“You two could train our future spies while you’re there,” Seonghwa looked at Hongjoong who nodded and then at Jongho. “Would you like that?”

“Training your spies for you, but they would be answering to me,” you sipped on your tea and everyone laughed. You shook your head. “I would… like that, actually. And maybe once I’ve had enough of the seaside and once we’re sick of the beach, we’d come back. What do you say?”

Jongho squeezed your hand. “Sounds like a plan.”

“Well then, do come visit often. Don’t just forget us,” Hongjoong said.

“Don’t pretend not to recognise us when we come to visit,” Jongho said and everyone laughed at that. 

“You’ll make a very good king, Prince Hongjoong,” you told him and his eyes gleamed at that. “Don’t disappoint us. Remember- we can always kill you in your sleep.”

“Maybe I shouldn’t have made friends with you,” Hongjoong looked at Seonghwa who was grinning. 

The four of you talked and joked and teased each other for a good while until it was time for the Prince to leave. You told them you were leaving for the south tomorrow as well. They shook hands with you and thanked you for your service. Hongjoong said, “I owe a lot of my success to you. I hope you know that, and I hope you appreciate that my doors are open for you, whenever you’d like.”

“And I owe the fact that I’m taking a breather to you too,” you nodded. “Come visit me for a vacation sometime.”

The two left and Jongho put an arm around your shoulder. “I’ll kind of miss them, even though I haven’t known them for long.”

“I know,” you smiled. “They really grew up on me.”

“You looked pleased when you showed off our rings,” Jongho teased and you laughed. “Are you that happy?”

“Of course I am,” you turned to him, straightening his shirt before putting your hands on his shoulders. “I’ll show it off to everyone I meet. I’m proud of us.”

Jongho smiled at that, and as you hugged each other, you knew that you’ll be at home with him wherever you go- whether it be the palace or this house or the south, or even another place, faraway.

He was your home.

Beginning of The End

⇴ pairing: toxic bf!choi jongho x gn!reader

⇴ genre: angst

⇴ words: 1.1k

⇴ warnings: fighting, mentions of alcohol, jongho is drunk

⇴ a/n: feedback is accepted and welcome, I’d love to hear your thoughts on my work! if you’d like to be on my taglist, lmk. if you’d like to see more of my work, check out my masterlist!

This fic does NOT represent my thoughts about Choi Jongho, nor portray his actual character in real life. This is fanfiction only.

⇴ tags: @hyuckilstan @star1117-archives @whatudowhennooneseesyou @jwnghyuns @az-con @noonaishere @rdiamond2727 @ja3hwa @wonwowzers @little-precious-baby

Another party. Another night filled with drunken sorority kids, couples fucking in random rooms, and the occasional sound of throwing up (not always in the bathroom). You didn’t want to be there. To be quite honest… you never wanted to be there. But you always did. For Jongho.

Jongho, your boyfriend of 8 months, asked you almost every week to come to these stupid parties. Or should you say, begged. You always gave in, too much of a people pleaser to say no. And yet each and every time you went to these parties, you were stuck in the same chair by the kitchen island. The one next to the wall, to be precise, knowing that most people won’t bother you there.

So here you are, yet again, sitting on the slightly wobbly chair, nursing your beer that tastes like ass. Jongho is who knows where, probably playing his millionth round of beer pong, promising his buddies the next round will be the time that he wins. He never does. You know he never does cause the entire night he complains about how close he was to winning.

Your entire relationship was… complicated. You loved him, at least you told yourself you did. But it was constant fighting. Mostly about insignificant things, such as him not doing the dishes, him brushing you off in public spaces, or only making dinner for himself. But some of it was larger, like his blatant lack of respect for your boundaries, or the two times you caught him flirting with other girls.

You honestly tried to let it go, especially when he reassures you that he loves you more than anything in this world. You know it’s not healthy to be in this relationship. But you just can’t let go of the person he used to be, back in the beginning of this relationship. He was loving, caring, and respectful. Maybe that was all just a show.

You brush off your heavy thoughts, focusing on your drink. By the time an hour went by, you had to pee. The journey through the house was difficult, squeezing your way around a few make out sessions. By the time you reached the bathroom, it was occupied. Great, you thought. A few knocks went by, nothing. You were about to walk away when it abruptly opened, showing a disheveled girl, and your boyfriend behind her.

It wasn’t hard to guess what they were doing, or about to do. Tears welled up in your eyes, knowing he actually just cheated on you. I mean, yeah he’s flirted with girls, but you believed his excuses. Even when you shouldn’t have. But there’s no excusing his way out of this one. Not this time.

You immediately rush to the door, hoping to just get away. You can hear the sound of him running on the wood floors, spurring you to move faster out the door. You rush towards your car, thanking the heavens you drove tonight. There’s no way he could’ve caught up to you before you opened the door. And yet he did. Before you could even get to the handle, he stepped in front of you, blocking your way.

“Baby please-,” he begged, desperation in his voice. You wouldn’t have it though, “No, Jongho,” you spit back at him, “No more excuses.” His eyes grew wide. He knew. He knew the game was over. That everything was falling apart. That he couldn’t string you along for any longer. Excuses wouldn’t work on you anymore.

“Y/n…”, he tried one last time. “Enough! No more Jongho,” anxiety building up in your chest, confrontation being something you’ve avoided for so long. “I will not let you treat me like trash.” And that was it. You quickly pushed his dejected body out of the way, far enough so you could get in your car. He could find a ride with the girl he was just making out with, or the countless girls he’d probably made out with previously.

The ride back to your place was a mess, eyes blurry from the tears in your eyes. You almost had to pull over a few times. There’s no reason to even be crying over him, you should’ve know it was going to be like this sooner or later. There were warning signs. You were holding onto a person that wasn’t there anymore. The old Jongho was gone.

The old Jongho would’ve said everything is gonna be alright. He would’ve taken you home as soon as you asked. He would’ve been a gentleman. By the time you got home, it was dead silent outside. Your phone read 2:49 am. The thought of not getting enough sleep before work already gave you the beginnings of a headache. It only spurred you to move faster into bed, drowning out the thoughts of Jongho.

When you woke up the next morning, your phone buzzed with texts and missed calls, all from Jongho. You shouldn’t be surprised, he does this every time he needs to reel you back in. But it won’t work this time. You move out of your room with your towel, headed for the shower. There’s always a feeling of stickiness the day after those parties.

You can’t help but think back to all the times Jongho has done you wrong. Small or large, he continuously broke your trust and stepped over your boundaries. Your chest tightened at the thought of him with another girl. You gave him everything. Whether it be your love, time, or even body. He was your first everything. He knew how much you meant to him. You obviously meant nothing to him, you argued in your head.

Never would you have thought that it would end up like this, crying in the shower over a stupid guy who treated you like trash. A couple years ago you would’ve said you’d never put up with someone like him. You’d never let that kind of behavior slide. But once your stuck in it… once you’ve fallen head over heels, it’s over. It took the worst of the worst for you to finally realize how much he didn’t care.

That’s the thing about men like him, they lure you in with promises and love, only to rip it away once you get comfortable. They put on a show, then take off the mask when you least expect it. Once you get out of the shower, you head over to your lit up phone. You were expecting more begging, maybe a half assed apology. But no.

The top message read: You can’t leave me Y/n. I won’t let that happen. You’re mine.

To be continued…

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