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Electro Archon & Fox Wife
I've seen this type of AU—archon!Tomo and nine-tailed fox!Kazuha—talked about before, and it's not that I have anything new to say; it's just a couple headcanons.
Like, Tomo's electric aura causes Kazuha's hair to become staticky; so, he turns into a big puffball sometimes. It can also linger for a period of time, and sakura blooms will stick all over him, much to Tomo's amusement and his chagrin.
Kazuha does NOT act as the Guuji of the Grand Narukami Shrine. He's too busy being the Electro Archon's keeper, which is a 24/7 job. He's also Tomo's little wife; so, yeah, he's gonna be by his husband's side more than anywhere else.
The Raiden twins, Ei and Makoto, work directly under Kazuha and help him manage Inazuma's governance. Y'can't trust Tomo to do it bc he'll do things at a snail's pace. If it's not that, then he's FORGOTTEN about the Thing™ altogether.
The twins are probably why the Madame of Tenshukaku hasn't collapsed from overworking yet.
He's super on the ball when it comes to festival organization, tho. The faster that gets done, the more time there is to drag Kazuha around to all the different festive activities. That means it's safe to say the Yashiro Commission is very close to their archon.
Since "raiden" belongs to the twins as a surname, I'd rather Tomo's formal title NOT be Raiden Shogun. He might just go by "The Almighty Shogun" bc I can't think of anything cool and doesn't sound too edgy.
He's also called the God of Dreams. His storms over Inazuma are not as violent as the ones he upholds out around the surrounding ocean. The patter of rain and gentle roll of thunder lull the ppl into restful slumber. Nightmares dare not pierce the protective storm of a god to disturb them.
Don't tell Kazuha, but Tomo does, in fact, have an obnoxious collection of cat-related items. No, it's not clutter! No, he's not a hoarder! Please don't throw them away, Kaede-hime!
In equal measure, don't tell TOMO that Kazuha has a series of journals filled w haiku that do nothing but praise the hell outta his husband. The Electro Archon doesn't need a bigger ego than he already has. That, and he might cry.
The mandatory Booba Sword is here, except Tomo wields a claymore made from one of Kazuha’s tails.
He had it commissioned when Tomo returned from the Archon War as one of the seven victors. (He was there, actually; he made sure his handsome himbo stayed alive.)
Ofc, this all happened secretly; so, when Tomo saw his foxy babe short one beautiful tail, he thought somebody assaulted him. After many “calm down’s,” hugs, and kisses, Kazuha managed to explain himself. Kazuha: It’ll grow back, okay? Now, stop worrying! Tomo: Kazu-chaaaan! 😫
In case ya wanted to know, Kazuha still wields a sword and the power of anemo.
Tama the Cat exists and is a recent addition to their home, but Tomo carries her everywhere. He also demands the Shogunate staff address her as Tama-sama. Kazuha refuses, but he buys her hella fancy cat necessities. He will also personally cook her fish.
Tomo and Venti trade alcohol frequently (when Venti’s actually around) and try to out-drink each other. They bicker about how to best ENJOY alcohol, too.
Kazuha just shakes his head right along w Zhongli. He can’t really say much, tho, bc he likes a good drink just as much as they do. He’s simply more delicate w his approach (and doesn’t drink anywhere NEAR as much).
Tomo calls Kazuha every nickname under the sun, ranging from the cutesy Kazu-chan to the more refined Kaede-hime; but there is one name, one moniker, that he's never said in front of him unless it was in a formal setting: The Madame of Tenshukaku.
You'll only ever hear those words in succession if Tomo's whining in your ear after the kitsune gave him a good scolding. It almost sounds like he's referring to a demon or monster. Tomo: Ei, the Madame of Tenshukaku has struck again! Take pity on this poor archon! Ei: Your Excellency, please make haste. The meeting is in five minutes. Tomo: *audible gasp, face of betrayal* The Madame has taken you, too!
Kazuha doesn't really use nicknames. He just addresses Tomo as "Your Excellency" and "Lord Shogun" like everyone else, even if they're alone in private. Occasionally, Tomo can coax him into calling him something like "Tomo-dono," but it's still not casual enough for him. He'd rather his wife drop the honorifics altogether when it's just them. Tomo: You'll call Tama "Tama," but you can't call me Tomo? Kazuha: She's a cat, you're the ELECTRO ARCHON, Your Excellency. Tomo: Yeah, but you're also my WIFE, and I permit you to call me by my name when we're alone!
The reality is that Kazuha prefers the proper forms of address bc it reminds him that Tomo has risen to the highest position someone on their level can reach and earned his seat amongst the Seven. He's just so proud! Tomo still wants to hear his name, tho. Sometimes, he wonders if he'll forget his own name bc no one'll hardly say it these days.
happy five years to the only man ever
Thank you for everything Mr Minecraft :]
AGENT CURT MEGA IS OFFICIALLY THE MOST BABYGIRL CURT MEGA CHARACTER!
CONGRATULATIONS LEGEND!!!!!
Omega believed in him.
Hunter believed in him.
So when it mattered most, Crosshair's hand didn't shake.
the prophecy is true
there she goes, massaging her temples again. she feels like a pot of boiling water left on the stove too long and the water is about to spill over the sides. " cash... " his name leaves the faerie's lips again. is he trying her patience on purpose? it would feel like it if she hadn't known from the beginning of their relationship that he was a chaotic man (the shirts were definitely the first giveaway). a groan leaves agatha. " 'roombarmy'? cash, i swear to fucking god. " there it is. he has driven her to swear. the f bomb, no less.
who even has seventeen knives.
uh oh.
a nervous grin takes over his features, a hand raising to the back of his neck. “well… not kitchen knives, no.” he crosses his arms, pursing his lips akin to a pout. “if i were to go and like, i dunno, check my actual arsenal then… yeah. way more than seventeen in there. different makes, sizes, weights. y'know. for every occasion.” when you need to kill someone a certain way. “i'm sure i could assign some of my knives to the roombarmy.” he has just coined a new term. he will be using it. his roombarmy.
Chat did i cook
Now What Doodles!!! (Bill is singing “Sixer” by @lilliththefan in the 3rd one hehehe)
((I literally can’t stop listening to Sixer))
a hero in his own way 🫡
Charlie!
YOU did it! You were right!
The superstitions were real
You did it, man!
hey um. should’ve asked you this before but um. so. how was. how was reeve’s. um. yknow. final show. with the um. happy ending. um. (im going to kill you i would have killed to be there so jealous)
😙😙😙 thank youuuu
oh it was HEART SHATTERING.
for those who haven’t seen it, this was how andre sent reeve off. if you hear me and @songbirds-poet crying, keep that shit to yourselves.