Girblogger - Tumblr Posts

I am her

Heroin chick

so hi. i haven't opened tumblr in like a month as i was away from home for my scholar internship, now i'm back and i don't even know where to start. first of all, i hate my house and my parents, i wish i could go back to vienna every single moment of every day since i've been here. i despise my bedroom, i eat too much, my bed stinks and everything reminds me of depression. today's been the worst so far, i don't even have the strength to wake up or answer some texts. and viennaaaa, oh how i miss the place, and the people. to them, it probably isn't as important, this is just a normal experience a lot of teenagers do, but to me, it was most likely the closest i'll ever be to knowing what it feels like to be alive, to have a group of friends you can laugh with and get high with and to have people who care about you and know you, even if just a little bit. i was alone and i was alright. nothing will ever bring me back to those feelings. feelings my mind has already erased due to how i'm used to this sick place. and i don't want to go back to school, i fear there's no more energy in me to spend another year like the last few ones. always swinging, ranting and raving, feeling like I'm being dragged around. and that one boy...for the first time ever, i felt like i could be interested in someone in a normal way. for the first time, i wasn't obsessive or unnatural, at least not while living through the moment. only he has a girlfriend. and like, who am i fooling? i am able to recognise that i am not his person anyway, and that nothing would have happened even if he hadn't already been with someone because of how i normally act and handle these situations -i don't feel like i deserve to be with someone, I'm firmly sure nobody will ever feel romantic attraction towards me-, the problem is that i don't know how to forget and how to move on from all of the simple, yet special things that have come upon me, as it never happened to me before.

sometimes i just feel like i wanna hang myself

looks kinda like the creation of adam

. ݁₊ ⊹why, why, why? . ݁˖ . ݁

. ݁₊ ⊹ 𝒔𝒂𝒊𝒅 𝒚𝒐𝒖’𝒓𝒆 𝒂 𝒘𝒊𝒍𝒅 𝒎𝒖𝒔𝒕𝒂𝒏𝒈 . ݁˖ . ݁

𝒅𝒊𝒓𝒆𝒄𝒕𝒆𝒅 𝒃𝒚 𝒔𝒐𝒇𝒊𝒂 𝒄𝒐𝒑𝒑𝒐𝒍𝒂 𝜗𝜚

𝒄𝒐𝒎𝒆 𝒐𝒏 𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒓𝒚𝒃𝒐𝒅𝒚 𝒕𝒐 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒃𝒐𝒂𝒓𝒅𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒔𝒄𝒉𝒐𝒐𝒍 ˖˚⊹ ꣑ৎ‎

𝒊𝒇 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒍𝒊𝒆 𝒅𝒐𝒘𝒏, 𝒍𝒊𝒆 𝒏𝒆𝒙𝒕 𝒕𝒐 𝒎𝒆 𝜗𝜚 ⊹ ‧₊˚

𝒑𝒖𝒕 𝒎𝒆 𝒊𝒏 𝒂 𝒎𝒐𝒗𝒊𝒆 ˚₊‧꒰ა ꣑ৎ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚

𝒊𝒕 𝒘𝒊𝒍𝒍 𝒃𝒆 𝒐𝒖𝒓 𝒔𝒘𝒂𝒏 𝒔𝒐𝒏𝒈 ˖⋆🦢࿐໋

just scored a 100/100 on Chemistry 🏹

. ݁₊ ⊹𝒅𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒎𝒆𝒓 𝒈𝒊𝒓𝒍. ݁˖ . ݁

𝒔𝒊𝒍𝒆𝒏𝒕 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒖𝒏𝒔𝒆𝒆𝒏 🗝️⊹₊ ⋆

btw sorry for not being active I was busy with exams! 🏹

𝒅𝒊𝒗𝒊𝒏𝒆𝒍𝒚 𝒓𝒐𝒕𝒕𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝜗𝜚. ݁₊

and then i wonder why i break out…

do guys find tan lines attractive??

just want to be loved and be an attention whore